Voices
by A Hidden Path
Summary: An AU fic set in Odaiba, featuring the older Chosen (Taichi, Yamato, Sora, Koushiro, Jyou, Mimi, and OC Eimi). The story follows them through their first year of high school in real time using journal entries, focusing on portraying character, and on delivering an authentic Japanese high school experience. Read on for teenage hijinks and school life :) Complete!
1. April 3

**An Intro to the Story**

Hey all! This story is going to be an exciting experiment for me! It's an AU fic set in Odaiba, with the older Chosen Children (Taichi, Yamato, Sora, Koushiro, Jyou, Mimi, and OC Eimi) starting their first year of high school. In this world, the kids _have not met, _and they are all first years,so we get to see how they interact as strangers and peers.

The really cool thing about this story is that it follows the kids in real time through one year of Japanese high school. I am following the Japanese school year calendar, so the story starts in mid April 2015 (some schools will start a week or two earlier, probably, but it kind of snuck up on me!). The story is told through journal entries written by the kids, one child per day. I hope to update once per week, so the story should end up being between 40 and 50 chapters (I might skip school breaks, and realistically, I might miss a week here and there).

This is a laid back, slice of life story about the daily life of Japanese first year high school students. I really want to practice the first person voice, and it's going to be a lot of fun to develop individual voices and writing styles for everyone. Some of the kids will write a lot, some will write a little, and they will all focus on different aspects of high school life, so it will be a great exercise in character writing. It's also going to be super cool to follow the Japanese school calendar, and to try my best to accurately portray high school life in Japan. There will be a lot of cultural notes provided to explain differences between Japanese and American high schools along the way (I wish I could accommodate more cultures, but I only have knowledge about those two, sorry guys D:).

This story is going to be very simple and light compared to my other fics, but that sounds fun, too! It will be a big challenge to write a journal entry every day, even if it is only 100-600 words long, or so.

I hope you'll enjoy _Voices!_

**Voices**

April 3: 20th-26th

**15.04.20**

**Monday**

**Kido Jyou**

It's natural to be nervous on your first day of high school, right? It's all so nerve-wracking. I mean, the first thing you have to do is shove your way through the crowds to read the class assignment boards, and I'm not very good at shoving. Then there's the endless opening ceremony, and we all have to sing the school song that we don't know yet, staring at our shoes and hoping that no one hears how tone deaf we are. Then, of course, we have the adventure of finding our classroom and introducing ourselves to everyone. I don't know, I guess it's kind of surreal to see all of these strangers, and to think, "Whelp, this is it. I'm stuck with these people every day for a solid year."

I hope I don't end up class president again. I'm _always_ voted class president, just because I look responsible- is it the glasses? I don't have time for the student government! I'm here to learn, and I already have so much homework. My brothers told me high school would be rough, but I wasn't expecting this.

Alright, I probably shouldn't complain that much. My high school is a ten minute walk from my apartment, it has a great reputation, and I passed the entrance exams with no problems. There are downsides, since joining a club is mandatory-who has time for that?!- and apparently I have to write a journal entry once a week. But I guess that's just life, right? I'll get through it.

But for now, I have an English worksheet that I can't make heads or tails of. I should have studied harder after graduation…

**April 21, 2015**

**Tuesday**

**Anami Eimi**

Dear Kitty,

I'm here, I did it, I'm actually in Japan, and I can't decide if I'm having the time of my life, or if I'm freaking out and dying and _help me ye merciful gods_.

It's all so new to me, everything. Every. Little. Thing. Seriously! Entering a house is different. Bathing is different. Eating is different. And man, I'm getting dizzy from bowing all of the time!

But I should probably back up a little. For fifteen years, my name was Amy Donahue, and I lived in the states with my American father and my Japanese mother. But now, I live in Japan with my mother's mother, and I just started my first year of high school. Well, technically, I spent a year in high school at the states, but they only have three years of high school in Japan, and I'm the same age as the first years here, so… Here I am.

Anyway, no one is going to be able to pronounce "Donahue Amy" here, so I took my mother's maiden name and switched to a Japanese form of my given name, and now I'm Anami Eimi. It probably sounds weird, renaming yourself like that, but as an American, I'm already going to stand out a lot here. Plus, I'll admit that I like being someone new, right down to my name. It's been like removing an old cloak, a cloak someone else swaddled me in, and weaving a new one.

In a lot of ways, I really love it here. It's calmer and cleaner than the states, although I don't really like how compact everything is. I wish I could live in a house, but obviously apartments are the only option in Tokyo. I really love the emphasis on politeness and respect in the culture, although I could do without the bowing. And my grandmother is such a sweet old lady, chattering at me and putting more food in front of me than anyone could possibly eat. I hardly knew her before now, but she's so gentle and kind, and the apartment is quiet and peaceful. She likes me. I like her. And I think I'm useful to her, too, doing some of the chores that are hard on an old body.

But the culture shock is rough. I grew up speaking both Japanese and English, so I'm fluent, and I even have a Tokyo accent. But I only learned the basics of reading and writing, and my school work is filled with kanji that I don't recognize. I almost had a meltdown when I opened my history text and couldn't read the first sentence. I've been learning at least ten new symbols per day, but I'm so behind…!

And let's be real: I stick out here. I look more American than Japanese. I'm pale with a pink undertone, I have western eyes (I mean double lidded, I hope that's not insensitive to say? I just don't know how else to specify), my hair and eyes are brown, and I'm curvy and medium weight. I'm five foot eight- sorry, sorry, 173 centimeters- and average _adult male_ here is 172 centimeters.

Basically, I'm a giant on every scale, at least compared to everyone else. When I had to read the classroom assignment boards, I didn't need to push through the crowd. I just looked over their heads.

But you know, I guess I'm not the only person who sticks out in my class. I'm in class 1-C, and I have some really interesting peers. The first person I have to mention, as far as sticking out goes, is Ishida Yamato. You can feel free to substitute any name for a man of unrivaled beauty here- Galahad, Fitzwilliam Darcy, Dorian Gray, Eros, Narcissus, Phoebus Apollo (hmm, apparently the ancient Greeks liked their men sexy, and who can blame them?).

Okay, I need you to close your eyes- which you can't do, because you're reading- Er… Well, try to picture this for me, okay? You won't regret it. You behold a beautiful face, an object of faultless symmetry and harmony. It features clear skin, a perfectly proportioned aquiline nose, and a firm, lightly clefted chin, but the odds are high that you won't notice any of that. This is partially due to his hair, which is spun gold set in place with an artist's painstaking touch. But mostly, unhappy reader, you are captured by his eyes, which are fanned with long golden lashes, and simultaneously every shade of blue imaginable.

No, really. Would I lie to you?

Now, it probably sounds like I'm in love with him, but that's not the case. Assuming that I know what love is, I flatter myself that I don't love with my eyes, but I _do_ admire with them, and I also observe with them, and I have to say that I'm very confused. How the heck is this dude Japanese?! What's going on? Little help, here? I'm dying to ask him. This kid is definitely King of the Mountain, as far as the girls are concerned. Every first year girl who already knew him spent the first day of school hoping she'd be in his class, then either celebrating or mourning.

I also met my first true redhead in this class. Sure, I've seen people with carrot colored hair, but Izumi Koushiro has some _red_ hair. It's blood red, sunset red, saturated and burning and deep. And this kid is _tiny, _shorter than about half of the girls. His eyes are dark and deep set, and he's got these thick, constantly disapproving brows. I wonder what he's thinking about all of the time? I don't know if I've ever seen him talk, except to give his name on the first day and answer a teacher's question, but he looks like he's thinking. He does the averted, concentrating eyes and the hand-on-the-chin thing, it's textbook nerd.

I want to talk about some of the other kids, but geez, I wrote so much- and I used way too much hiragana- I'm supposed to be practicing kanji. I have to go! Bye!

Yours,

Eimi

**15/04/22**

**Wednesday**

**Yagami Taichi**

Since these journal entries are supposed to be checked, but not read, I can say what I want, right? Like how stupid this is? Just what I need, another homework assignment that I'll forget about.

Speaking of, where the heck did I leave my planner? Is it in my desk? I wrote my homework assignments down on it like my mom made me promise to, but uh... Yeah, not very useful now. I dunno what today's homework is... Guess I had better try to make friends with a smart kid in my class. Maybe that tall dude with glasses.

But there's more important stuff to worry about, like try-outs for the football club. I mean, I was captain in middle school, so I already know some of the kids in the club. They know I'm solid. I should get in, no problem.

But just in case, I had better go practice.

**15.04.24**

**Thursday**

**Izumi Koushiro**

I can't say I'm fond of this assignment. I'd much rather solve math problems, or even write an essay. But a journal? What am I supposed to record here? As a student, my life is routine: classes, homework, programming, sleep. I rather doubt that any events worth describing will occur.

Because I'm obliged to write something, I'll mention that it's mandatory to join a club in this school. That's disheartening. I suppose my only option is the computer club, but I'm afraid it will be a waste of time, as I doubt I'll learn anything new there. Hopefully, members are allowed to pursue their own interests independently during meetings. That would be inconvenient, since my system at home is preferable to anything in our school's computer lab, but tolerable.

My parents tell me that this will be good for me, but I fail to see the benefits. However, the thought of my joining a club seems to make them happy, so I've stopped voicing my concerns at home.

**15/04/25**

**Friday**

**Takenouchi Sora**

I can't believe I'm in high school already. If it weren't for the cherry blossoms blooming, I'd think that there was some sort of mistake. How does time pass so quickly? It would all be a blur if we didn't have seasons to make the months distinct.

School years usually start off slow, but there's so much to do in high school. There's been a lot of homework, and classes are jam packed with new information. I've been trying to keep up as best I can, but it's difficult. I haven't had much time to socialize yet, but everyone in my class seems nice. We do have one kid who keeps falling asleep at his desk and not doing his homework, though. I wonder why Yagami-kun has such a hard time focusing? The teachers are very hard on him.

Hopefully, I'll start making friends in a club, but I don't know which one to join. My mother is pushing for home ec club. They told me that they do a lot of sewing, which I'm interested in, but I don't want to basically train to be a wife for three years. There's nothing wrong with being a housewife, of course, but it's not what I want. I wish I could join the women's football club, but my mother won't allow it. I was injured often playing football in elementary school, so I took up tennis in middle school. I'll probably end up in the tennis club. It's good exercise, and I enjoy it, but I do miss football… I'm probably too out of practice to be of use to the team, anyway.

Well, here's to a good year together! I'm going to try my best and enjoy it.

**15/04/26**

**Saturday**

**Tachikawa Mimi**

Dear Diary,

I can't believe it! I'm finally back in Japan, and I'm so happy! I spent middle school in the states because of my Papa's work, but now I'm back, and I missed it sooooo much! But I hope I don't get fat from eating all of the snacks they don't have in America, haha!

I'm a little bummed, though... When I left Japan, it was hard to say goodbye to my friends. Then I got settled in the states, and it was sad to leave_ them_. And now, all of my old friends are scattered to different schools, and there are only two of them in my class, and they don't seem very interested in me anymore. I thought this would be like coming home, but it's almost like starting over again.

There are some good things, though... Somehow, I still passed this school's entrance exams, just barely. American middle school wasn't very good preparation, but my parents hired tutors just for Japanese high school exams. It sucked, but it worked, and now I don't need tutors anymore, yessss!

And oh yeah, I met the. Cutest. Guy. _Ever!_ He makes last year's idols look like last decade's! He's got blond hair, blue eyes, and serious style. Yes, I can tell, even if everything from our clothes to our bags and shoes are uniform. It's mostly his hair that shows it- it's like he's a step ahead of the trends.

But don't get cocky, Ishida-kun! You need more than looks to interest me, even if they are heart-stopping. After all, I still know I'm beautiful!

Okay, I've got sooooo much homework, so bye~~~

XOXOXO

Mimi

**15/04/26**

**Sunday**

**Ishida Yamato**

Sometimes I can't decide if I love girls, or if I hate them.

It's nothing personal, it's just... This was my first week of high school, right? The only girl I've had an actual conversation with was... What's her name, the American girl. And yet, I already found a love letter in my shoe cubby, and another in my desk.

Maybe it's just me, but I kind of think that a love letter shouldn't be your introduction to someone. How can they possibly like me? They've never said a word to me! Although... I guess the letters were anonymous. They might have known me in middle school.

Speaking of, I was hoping the giggling and blushing and staring at shoes would end when I graduated middle school, since we're all getting older and maturing. But apparently, that just means that they feel old enough to send love letters now. Just what I needed.

I won't lie. Sometimes, I like the attention. But sometimes, it's hard to swallow that people see my face and never bother to go deeper.

But this is getting sappy, so...

I want to start my own rock band in high school. I put fliers for auditions on all of the school's bulletin boards. The problem is that my band would technically be a club, so I need a minimum of five members to start it. But everyone is required to join a club by May 8th, so I don't have much time to recruit. I didn't say so on the fliers, but I also don't want any girls, because I want everyone to be focused- I don't want members to flirt during practice. I don't mean to be harsh, I just really want the band to succeed. But of course, cutting out girls will make it that much harder to find four more members.

I don't know… I wonder if I'm being stupid, trying to make this happen. It's not like I have any skill or experience. I just like to play bass and sing, and I've written a few songs. It's hard to tell how good they are when I can only play one instrument. But I've been so focused on trying this, and I know I would regret it if I didn't take a chance. All I can do is work hard and hope for the best.

Speaking of, I'm going to go over these English lyrics I wrote. I hope I didn't make any mistakes, but it seems like I find another problem every time I look at them.

_End of the third week of April. See you next week!_

**Cultural Notes:**

**-About Odaiba:** Odaiba is a man-made island in Tokyo Bay. It is connected to Tokyo's mainland via the Rainbow Bridge, and you can also travel there by ferry.

**-The kids are all strangers: **Odaiba is a small, man-made island. Due to its size, it is unlikely that all seven kids are total strangers. Statistically, at least two of them should know one another as elementary or middle school classmates, but I'm ignoring this for the sake of the story.

**-15/04/20, 15.04.21, April 22, 2015: **The first two represent common Japanese ways of writing the date (yy/mm/dd, .dd). The third is a common American way of writing the date, which, as a foreign student, Eimi uses. I am also including the day of the week for the convenience of the reader, although the students wouldn't bother to give that information.

**-Class assignment boards:** Each Japanese high school class generally contains twenty or more students. Each grade, years one, two, and three, will consist of a few classes, usually labeled by letter. (Hence, class 1-A, 1-B, 2-A, 2-B, etc). When the students arrive at school at the start of a new year, they walk up to big boards for each class and try to find their names.

**-Opening ceremonies: **A portion of the first day of school is given up to an assembly where the principle/student body president/other officials address the students. I'm made to understand that these ceremonies end with singing the school song.

**-High school location, entrance exams:** It's not uncommon for Japanese high school students to commute _over two hours_ to high school, each way, every day! This is more common in the country than in Tokyo. Also, every time a student graduates and moves on to a new schooling level (elementary to middle, middle to high, high to college), they need to pass difficult entrance exam to enter their school of choice. It's all very competitive, and this is partially why suicide rates are high among Japanese youths. If you can't get into a good school, your future can be compromised.

**-Mandatory clubs:** Some high schools force students to join a club. This is supposed to foster positive relationships among students. Specifically, older students (senpai) are supposed to teach and guide younger students (kohai), and younger students learn to respect the older students. The kohai often have to do the dirty work, like cleaning up after the end of the meeting. Clubs are a big deal, and they often meet several times a week for two to three hours. A student's club is his or her primary social group, and students generally stay in the same club for all of high school.

**-Dear Kitty:** Eimi is imitating Anne Frank, who addressed her famous diary as "Kitty." This is probably equal parts copycat, respect/homage, and an excuse to address a person- the non-existent Kitty- as a reader in her writing.

**-Three years of high school in Japan:** Yep, Japanese high school consists of three years. Instead of having freshman, sophomores, juniors, and seniors, they have first years, second years, and third years.

**-Kanji: **The Japanese language utilizes three writing systems: hiragana, katakana, and kanji. Hiragana is a character alphabet used to spell out Japanese words. Katakana is a character alphabet used to import foreign words into the Japanese language. Kanji are Chinese characters that the Japanese use heavily in their writing. Each kanji is a character that stands for a word or a group of words. There are over 40,000 kanji, but 2,000 of them represent 95% of the characters commonly used in text. Eimi knows katakana and hiragana, but her knowledge of kanji is not up to the standard of her new peers.

**-Feet and centimeters: **Eimi is used to American forms of measurement, but Japan, like all sensible nations, uses the metric system.

**-Football:** For my fellow Americans, 'football' means soccer, not American football, the game with the tackling and the concussions.

**-Cherry blossoms blooming: **The Japanese school year begins when the sakura, or cherry blossoms, are in bloom. Anime episodes always show the pink petals in episodes about a new school year.

**-Uniforms, uniform shoes, uniform bags: **Japanese high school students wear uniforms, both in private and public schools (this practice generally begins in middle school). Also, each school has uniform school shoes (see the note on shoe cubbies below). Some schools even issue uniform bags, usually brown and rectangular (a statchel). Some schools also have rules about outerwear, usually forbidding patterns and certain colors- students might be limited to solid coats in navy/black/brown/gray, or so on.

**-Conversations between boys and girls:** In Japan, the students tend to polarize by sex. The boys hang out together, and the girls hang out together. It would be somewhat unusual for a girl to approach a boy and start talking outside of club activities or school specific interactions. Of course, Eimi has not been socialized in this way, since she grew up in the states.

**-Shoe cubby, desk:** Japanese students arrive to school wearing their street shoes. They walk to the shoe cubbies (called a genkan), remove their shoes, and put on the uniform school shoes waiting there. At the end of the day, the students switch back to their street shoes and go home. Each student's cubby is labeled, and so it's the perfect place to leave a love letter. Yamato also finds a letter in his desk, and this implies that the sender is in his class, and knows which desk is his. Japanese students stay in their homeroom all day, except for classes like gym and music that require special equipment. Thus, the desk is only used by Yamato. The top of the desk usually lifts straight up, so books and supplies can be stored inside.

**-English lyrics:** Don't ask me why, but Japanese music is filled with English lyrics. There are even bands that perform songs solely in English! Usually though, it's just a random word or phrase here and there.

**Author's Note: **Phew! Are any of you still reading? Props!

Okay, so I'm planning to update this story once a week for a year, with a few weeks off here and there, so I'll see you next week! I will still be writing for my other stories- it only takes me about 10-30 minutes to knock out one of these entries everyday, so the challenge is to stay on top of things. The entries will grow more and more interesting as the kids begin to interact, both in positive and negative ways…

My next update will be a new one shot story about the boys having a… Well, a facial hair growing contest. Please look for it some time next week. I'll also be drawing a cover for this story.

I had a lot of fun putting myself in everyone's shoes! Thanks for reading!


	2. April 4

**Voices**

April 4: 27th-3rd

**15/04/27**

**Monday**

**Ishida Yamato**

I'm starting to think this whole band thing was a huge mistake. You would not _believe_ the people who've been auditioning. Someone tried to get into a rock band with a _recorder_! A clarinet! And even worse, I've had a bunch of girls who want to sing, and even a few who want to be the club's "manager." What does that even mean for a high school band? It's gotten so bad that I've had to go around to all of the fliers and write on more information.

At least I've found a guitarist and a keyboardist. I still need drums, and I guess someone for rhythm guitar, since I need a fifth to meet the minimum club size. Our guitarist is Hiro, this smirky kid from 1-A who thinks he's hot shit. He's tall, black-haired, black-eyed, and he swaggers, with his legs and arms bent and his hands in his pocket. It's obnoxious, and I'm worried about his attitude, but here's the thing: he _is_ hot shit, at least when it comes to playing guitar. The keyboardist is Akihiko, a mellow guy from 1-B with brown hair and a sort of glazed expression, like his mind is far away. He composes, too, which is great, but his lyrics are meaningless b.s., like beatnik poetry.

Actually, I could use someone who is good with words, especially in English. Takeru is helpful for editing my lyrics, but until he grows a little older, he just doesn't have the maturity to write something worth singing about. I mean, what do middle schoolers have on their brains, anyway? For me, it was rampaging emotions, mostly. Not sure about Takeru. Not sure I want to know.

In other news, we might have the world's biggest idiot in my class. Yagami-kun really rubs me the wrong way, it's like everything he does is calculated to annoy me. He can't talk without half-shouting. He'll ask you a question, then talk over your answer. And he always talks to me- or at me, anyway- like we're best friends. I swear, if he puts his hand on my shoulder one more time, he's not getting it back.

Kid's an enormous idiot, too. Has he turned in a single homework assignment yet? Seems like at least five minutes of every class is devoted to teachers scolding him about not doing his work. What a joke!

But the most annoying thing of all is that people seem to like him! He just wanders around talking to whoever he feels like, boys, girls, whatever, and most of them just let him blather on.

Sometimes I really don't understand people.

**15.04.28**

**Tuesday**

**Kido Jyou**

I think I'm starting to get the hang of high school life. I'm attending a great cram school a few days a week, which excuses me from some of the medical club meetings. The medical club studies medical journals and developments together, and we also help out the nurse after school in shifts (someone has to be on duty at school until the athletic club meetings are finished each day, in case of injury).

The classes are interesting and demanding. We're taking Japanese I, contemporary society, mathematics I, science I, English I, physical education, and music, art, or calligraphy. I'm completely tone deaf, and I can't draw, so I chose calligraphy. I don't like how the subjects are mashed together, though. For example, "mathematics" and "science" are so vague, and concepts from different branches are presented together. Things will get more specific next year, and I'm looking forward to that. For now, I just have to stay sharp and learn whatever is thrown at me.

I generally have few friends, since I focus on studying so much, but I think I've struck up a comfortable alliance with Izumi Koushiro. He spends lunch breaks reading computer books, and I asked to join him last week. We read together, and sometimes I convince him to help me make sense of math class.

He's smart, but I don't think he's too interested in his grades. He's incredible at math and science, naturally gifted, you know. But he doesn't seem to care much about his other subjects, although his performance is still above average. It's a little frustrating- if he just applied himself more, he'd probably get perfect scores on everything. But as far as I can tell, he's interested in three things total: computers, math, and science. Nothing else even registers on his radar. It's really pretty incredible.

Anyway, I was pretty surprised when our little group expanded the other day. Anami Eimi, a tall American girl, asked to join us. At first, I was shocked and a little annoyed, honestly. A girl has _never_ walked up to me and asked to sit down before. I mean, there's nothing wrong with it, but it's just generally… Not done. But she likes to read, and I guess she must not know anyone in the school, since she just moved to Japan, so I guess I can understand. But I liked our group how it was- small and serious.

But when I looked at her, it really hit me- Anami-kun is _American_. She's a native speaker of English, which is probably my worst subject. I don't know how smart she is, but she's more than worth befriending for that alone. I stood so fast to get her a chair that my knees cracked.

Oh, speaking of girls… Have I mentioned Tachikawa Mimi? I didn't really notice at first, since I was so nervous about starting high school, but I have literally never seen anyone as beautiful as her. Not movie stars, not idols, no one. I'm not sure I can describe it well enough, but… She's dainty and graceful and confident, and she has hair like browned honey, and her lips are so pink, and her voice is like a wind chime, and I'm going to stop because I'm embarrassing myself.

I'm sure I'll never be able to do more than admire, since I'm busy studying, and girls aren't my strong suit. But it's a nice perk of being in this class. I wish I could talk to her, but I wouldn't know what to say, anyway.

It's best to focus on my studies.

**15/04/29**

**Wednesday**

**Yagami Taichi**

Ughhhh! I tried out for soccer club, but get this- they don't tell us who made it until May 4th! We have a competitive club and a recreational one, and I tried out for the competitive one, so I have to wait until everyone tries out before I get the results.

But I mean, there's no reason to worry. I was great, so no big! Right?

Anyway, would someone tell me what's up Ishida's butt? Probably his own big head... I went to talk to him today, right? And just as I'm saying hi, he whips around, gives me this evil death glare, and says, "Personal space, Yagami-kun."

So I guess I had my hand on his shoulder, which, I mean, is that such a huge deal? I don't even think about that stuff. Anyway, I let go, and I said, "Sorry, man. Didn't realize you were so delicate."

I think he wanted to say something back, because his face went all pink, but then Takenouchi, this soft-spoken girl with killer legs, showed up out of nowhere and started talking to me.

Obviously, I'd rather talk to her than argue with Ishida, and the next thing I knew, we were talking soccer, and I forgot about him.

I wonder what all of the girls see in Ishida? I swear, his name is like a buzz whenever class isn't going on. Whatever. If they want a pretty jerk, they can have him.

I bet girls like Takenouchi are smarter than that...

**April 30, 2015**

**Thursday**

**Anami Eimi**

Dear Kitty,

At first, I was too busy adjusting to notice it, but... I truly don't know a single person in Japan, do I?

I spent the lunch breaks last week desperately trying to memorize some kanji, but... I really want to talk to someone. I haven't really so far, and... Well, I would like to. It's lonely, having no one in an entire hemisphere.

So this Monday, I took a good look around the room during lunch and made my choice. Oh, maybe I should back up here. Lunch break is sort of... different here. There is no cafeteria, so everyone has to bring a lunch from home. I bring leftovers from dinner, because my grandmother makes so much. We eat in our classroom, although I think you can move around a little if you want? I don't know anyone in the other classes, so there's no point for me.

Right, so I was looking around, and I saw that Izumi-kun and Kido-kun were sitting together. But they were totally ignoring each other and reading. This was kind of stupid of me, because I know how annoying it is to be bothered while I'm reading, but I guess watching them read felt inviting. I asked if I could join them, and only Kido-kun looked up.

Have I mentioned Kido Jyou? I like him! He's really tall (taller than me, which means that I have to like him a little automatically, haha) with dark hair that almost looks blue. He has dark eyes and glasses, which I think complement his long face. Or at least, I can't picture him _without_ the glasses. He's kind of thin, stretched out, and gawky, but he's nice.

At first, I think he was surprised, and maybe a little annoyed. But then he jumped up and dragged a desk over for me and put it up against his, isn't that nice?

I really expected that he would keep reading and I would study, but he shut the book and started asking me about English. Before I knew it, we were pouring over his notes for our English class. He had so many questions, I don't think I've been spoken to so much all together since I left the states! He was really easy to talk to, since he directed the conversation and listened when I answered.

I've been sitting with them all week. Izumi-kun hasn't looked at me once the whole time, but today he nodded to me when I sat down. I think he's reading computer books. That's what SQL is, right? Computer talk for databases? Maybe tomorrow I'll ask him.

So anyway, I don't have to awkwardly sit alone anymore, and I think they're both really nice, even if Izumi-kun doesn't speak. I don't think he's stuck up or superior; he just has his mind on other things.

But I still have a problem, because I'm supposed to pick a club! I've attended some meetings at the choir club and a few a capella clubs, but I don't know... I'm sure I'd like them, but the music is so unfamiliar to me (I didn't listen to much Japanese stuff growing up). I wasn't too interested in any of their pieces, and... Well, I hope this isn't too rude, but... Well, I sort of... Sing a lot better than they do...? I'm sorry, I'm sorry! I had this problem in the states, too... I want everyone to be at my level (or better, preferably), but of course it isn't possible when you're joining a club for fun with no real entrance requirements.

The girls have been gossiping about Ishida-kun's club, which is a rock band. I found one of the fliers today and had a major giggle fit that made some people stare at me, I think. He's added by hand that he is looking for a drummer and a rhythm guitarist **ONLY**, underlined, bolded, and in caps. I wonder what's got him in a snit? It must be really funny to see that pretty face all irritated.

Still, you know, I bet it would be worth checking out, just for fun. I can play guitar... sort of. Alright, I power chord like no one's business, but hey, at least I'm bringing the correct instrument. And I bet he'll be surprised when I sing. They usually are, and I don't mean that proudly. What I mean is, people never seem able to reconcile my voice with the rest of me, which I'm pretty sure isn't a good thing.

Well, I'll think about it, I guess.

Classes are really something here! Back home, students were separated on the basis of their abilities. We had normal, honors, and advanced classes. Here, everyone is assumed to have the same academic ability, so they teach everyone at the highest standard. I really miss the freedom to choose my schedule that I had in the states. Here, the whole class takes the same classes together, so I don't get to choose which type of science or history I want to take. The teachers come to us in our homeroom, except for P.E., music, and lab classes, so we sit in the same room almost all day. My only choice was between music, art, or calligraphy, so of course I chose music, but I wish I could take art, too.

Luckily for me, there's no history this year! I don't know _anything_ about Japanese history, so I thought I'd be at a huge disadvantage, but we're taking contemporary society. I thought that meant "social studies," which is basically history, but we're studying what's going on around the world _now _(I told you I couldn't read the darned textbook). Phew! I have a year to try and catch up, since second years take Japanese history here.

Maybe Kido-kun has some kind of primer he'd be willing to lend me…

Yours,

Eimi

**15.05.1**

**Friday**

**Izumi Koushiro**

I've joined the computer club. I'm happy to see that we are allowed to sit at our systems and do what we please during the majority of each meeting, but I would still prefer to be at home. My club mates have taken to asking me questions, and the more I answer, the more they ask. I'm apparently already building a reputation as something of an expert, which is ridiculous. I've a long way to go before I reach that level.

Furthermore, the system I use at school is a dinosaur compared to mine, and mine has my preferences, projects, and favorite programs loaded on it. This is all so troublesome… Besides, I can't drink oolong tea here. I mentioned that to my mother, and the next day she packed me an extra snack and an oolong tea in a small cardboard carton.

I've decided to stop complaining.

Until a few days ago, I had a pleasant lunch arrangement with Kido Jyou. We sat together and worked on separate pursuits, which removes a ridiculous social stigma surrounding reading alone. But a few days ago, Anami Eimi asked to join us. My heart sank when Kido-san accepted. Females tend to chatter. This is a generalization, of course; for example, Yagami-san speaks more than Anami-san, in my limited experience.

Kido-san and Anami-san generally discuss English for the entire lunch period. It took a day or two to adjust to the new sounds. I've found that Anami-san's voice is a pleasant background noise, and she's very articulate, more so than Kido-san. Perhaps it would be wise to listen to some of her explanations. English isn't my best subject, but my reading material is so much more interesting.

Speaking of, I had better complete tonight's worksheet.

**15/05/02**

**Saturday**

**Tachikawa Mimi**

Dear Diary,

Maybe I should have stayed in the states for high school. The classes here are so much harder, I don't understand anything! And American kids get all of the fun stuff, dances and proms and dating and parties. Everyone here is so serious, I want to scream!

I don't understand. Usually I make all kinds of friends with no problems, but it feels so much harder now. Is it because I became too American, or something? Everyone liked me in the states, and everyone liked me in Japan before I left, but now everyone is either buried in their books or shutting me out. And some of the girls give me such mean looks...! What's with them?!

Ugh. Forget them! At least I have Sora-chan. She's this quiet, nice girl who is somehow totally older than the rest of us on the inside. I don't really get how she can be so patient and thoughtful all of the time. This girl in our class totally snubbed her the other day. Aiko-kun was supposed to be doing day duty with Sora-chan, and she just bailed and went to try out for Ishida-kun's band. Sora said, "Go ahead, good luck," even though Aiko-kun didn't apologize or anything. She was so calm, but I was _so_ mad! You can't bail on a girl just to try and impress a boy, no matter how hot he is.

I stayed with Sora-chan and helped her finish cleaning, and that's how we became friends. And when I get annoyed at Aiko-kun, Sora-chan just smiles and says, "It all worked out. We're friends now, right?"

And I'm like geeeeeeeez, heaven called, they're missing an angel.

So really, though, I guess it is okay. Who needs Aiko-kun and her friends when I have Sora-chan?

I hope Sora-chan is smart, too, because I'm looking at my math homework, and it makes me want to cry. You know who I think is smart, though? Anami Eimi, that American girl. Or at least, she gets the questions right when she's called on, and she sits with the nerd herd at lunch. Hey- that's actually a great idea! We can talk about the states, and I can tell her stuff about Japan, and she can help me with school.

Okay, well, I still have to do my homework, so goodbye!

XOXOXO

Mimi

**15/05/03**

**Sunday**

**Takenouchi Sora**

I've tried out for the tennis club. I only hope I did it for the right reasons... My mother kept talking about the home ec club, and I... I was getting frustrated, and I felt cornered. I hope I didn't join the tennis club just to assert myself. Of course, I don't know if I made the team or not yet.

What's done is done- I should be more cheerful, like Mimi-chan. She helped me out the other day, and now we're friends, and I'm very glad. She has a very vibrant personality, so I can't help liking her. She has a great sense of style, and we've been having a lot of fun talking about clothes. I wonder if I'll be brave enough to show her my design sketchbook someday? If someone as stylish as her likes my designs, then I would feel a lot better about my silly daydream of becoming a clothing designer.

I wonder if that would be feminine enough for my mother? You'd think so, but she's very insistent on my learning ikebana. There's an ikebana club at school, but my mother said it was below my skill level. I'm not sure that that's true. I'm not especially talented, no matter how much my mother wants me to be.

I wonder what she would think of my designs? I'm worried that she'd tell me to focus on ikebana instead, since it's the family business. It's true that our business is stable, and that very few people manage to break into the fashion industry.

Ah, Mimi-chan's here. She's going to show me her favorite stores on the mainland, and I'm sure it will be great!

_End of the fourth week of April. See you next week!_

**Cultural Notes:**

**-Soccer/football:** I had a reviewer point out that Taichi and Daisuke call this sport "soccer" in the original Japanese, which confused me because I know the sport is called "football" in Japan. I looked it up, and yes, officially the sport is called "football," by which I mean the Romanization "futtoboru." Their national league is called the Japanese Football Association. However, after American influence following World War II, people started calling the game "soccer," or rather "sakka." So basically, it seems both are correct! I will probably default to soccer from now on, though, since it's in the canon, and since I call the sport soccer myself. Thanks for helping me clear this up!

**-Cram school: **Many Japanese students attend more school after school by choice! The varieties of schools have different names depending on their type, but I'm going to simply translate it as "cram school." Some of these schools teach specific skills, but most are aimed at helping students pass entrance exams. Jyou's participating so early in his first year of high school is a bit… over-enthusiastic, since he won't take college entrance exams until his third year, but people do it, and Jyou is definitely someone who would.

**-Staying in the classroom all day: **As Eimi says, Japanese students stay in their desk in their classroom all day, except for classes that require special facilities. The teachers come to them, and they also eat lunch there. The students are also responsible for cleaning the classroom each day before they go home. This is supposed to instill a sense of pride and ownership over the classroom, and to create solidarity among the class. Also, since the class stays together all of the time, they all take classes at the same academic level, and there is very little room for students to make choices about their schedules. It's common for students to feel like their classes are simply beyond their capabilities.

**-American kids get all the fun stuff: **Yep, there are no dances/proms at Japanese high schools. Dating is strongly discouraged by schools and parents, and many Japanese youths don't have a chance until college (although for the sake of the story, I may ignore this). High school partying, drinking, and drug use is rare, too, at least compared to the states.

**-Day Duty:** Japanese students rotate daily responsibilities. Common duties include taking attendance and telling the students to stand and bow when a teacher enters the room, serving lunch if there is a school cafeteria, putting away equipment (gym materials, art materials, cleaning a lab, etc), and cleaning the classroom after school.

**-Ikebana: **The Japanese art of flower arrangement.


	3. May 2

**Voices**

May 2: May 11th-17th

**15/05/11**

**Monday**

**Ishida Yamato**

Ugh. Rough week.

So I found my drummer, but that put us at four members- one short from the minimum of five. And that's when things started getting desperate.

The actual guitarists and drummers all auditioned, and for the last few days, I only had girls with violins and singers to turn away. At this point, my only choice was to take a horrible guitarist, pick a manager, give someone a freaking tambourine to wave around, or shut down the band before it even starts. I was starting to lose sleep over it when Anami Eimi showed up.

Eimi-kun's the class American, and I'll be honest; I feel bad for her. People kind of treat her like a freak show. Whenever someone talks to her, it's to ask about the states or English, or to shine a spotlight on how different she is, and, well, I know the feeling.

So maybe that's why I wasn't so annoyed when she asked for an audition, although it might have helped that she brought a guitar. Another thing is that she doesn't blush or giggle or stare at her shoes when she talks to me. She just... looks me in the eye and talks.

I was the only one in the clubroom that day, so I figured, why not give her a shot? I had nothing else to do. She sat down and started playing, and I almost told her to stop. _God_, she's awful. I didn't recognize the song, but she obviously stripped it down to power cords. The strings protested when she shifted from one to the other- they made kind of a thin whine as her fingers slid.

But then she started to sing. I couldn't hear the guitar anymore, and it didn't matter that I couldn't understand the English lyrics. Her voice is... ethereal, aching, sweet. Like flight turned to sound. I was stunned- you could have poked me and knocked me over.

I didn't want any girls in my club. She's a rank beginner as a guitarist. But... She seems okay, and she _does_ speak English, and there's that voice...

In the end, I offered to let her join the band as our manager. I want her to give us singing lessons, and to try to write lyrics for us. In return, I'll teach her how to compose, and Hiro-kun will give her guitar lessons every practice. I hope I don't regret it, but I also offered to write two songs a year for her to perform. Her voice isn't a rock voice, but I'll figure something out to form a complete club with someone useful.

I don't know if she'll go for it. I can tell she wants to perform- she doesn't want to feel like a bench warmer. So... I really hope I don't regret this, but I told her she can play rhythm guitar if she improves enough to satisfy Hiro-kun and me.

This has been so obnoxious. If Eimi-kun doesn't accept, I don't know what I'm going to do.

I'm going to call Takeru.

**May 12, 2015**

**Tuesday**

**Anami Eimi**

Dear Kitty,

I'm really glad I met Jyou-kun and Koushiro-kun. I feel calm around them. They accepted me really easily, and mostly we talk about school and nerdy stuff. Yeah, Koushiro-kun talks to me now! Buuuut only in tiny sentences, and only about science. But it's simple and intellectual. I don't have to explain myself or where I came from to them.

That's becoming such a big problem for me. I didn't realize it, but apparently being pale is a big deal here? And I'm _super_ white. I'm a polar bear (actually, they turn kind of yellow, don't they?).

So yeah, it starts innocently enough. My female classmates will start talking about how pretty my skin is, and what whitening product do I use? (Wait, whaaaaaat? That's a thing?) Then it shifts, and before I know it, I've got girls asking my measurements and bra size and hip size, and apparently curvy is exotic here?

And by now I'm red faced, stammering, and glancing at any male classmates within earshot.

Today Tachikawa Mimi saved me from one of these conversations. I don't know how to describe it. She just slid into the group, redirected the conversation, looped arms with me, and slipped back out. It was like James Bond with less gunfire and more suave. And also more mascara.

I feel like you maybe shouldn't trifle with Mimi-kun...

Anyway, she talked to me after school today. Apparently she lived in the states during middle school. I didn't talk much. I felt so homesick... I don't miss the people so much, but I do miss the familiarity. I feel like I'm skydiving without an instructor. Sometimes I feel like I forgot the parachute, too.

Oh, oh! I tried out for Ishida-kun's band. It was... weird? I got mixed vibes from him. He made me this super conditional offer to join his club, but sometimes he seemed reluctant, and other times he seemed to be trying to sweeten the deal. The problem is that I wouldn't be a regular performer in the band, which... Not super compelling. I also got the feeling that he more... _needs_ me there than wants me there? I can't figure out why that would be true.

Also, is it me, or is he kind of a moody little so-and-so? Would I get along with him and his band mates?

He did offer to teach me to compose, and to have his guitarist teach me... And I mean, I AM pretty lousy at guitar...

Hmm...

Yours,

Eimi

**15/05/13**

**Wednesday**

**Yagami Taichi**

Yesssss I made the soccer club! Annnd I'm the only first year on the starting lineup! I mean, not that I doubted it would happen.

I'm playing offense, too! Score! I've been to some practices, and I'm glad everyone is taking it seriously. I'm on a great team. It's going to be a great year!

I wish I could say the same thing for my stupid class. Ugh! My skin is crawling. I found out yesterday that there's an Ishida Yamato fan club. God, I wish I were shitting you. I thought this crap only happened in bad shoujo anime. But no... No, it's a real thing. I just threw up a little in my mouth.

I mean, it's not an official club, obviously. Just some first year girls getting together to gush about him. I only know about it because I heard them gossiping in the genkan.

I hope his stupid band can't find that stupid fifth member, and he has to tuck his tail between his legs and give it up.

And I hope my team kicks ass at our first game. I'd better go practice.

**15/05/14**

**Thursday**

**Takenouchi Sora**

I made the tennis club! I'm so relieved. I hope we all get along and improve together.

I think my mom was a little disappointed, but she congratulated me. Sometimes it's so hard to tell what she's thinking. If I asked, would she tell me?

I'm worried about Mimi-chan. She keeps saying that the girls in our year are snubbing her. I tried to convince her that she's just comparing her last year of middle school, where everyone knew and liked her, to the first year here, where everyone is starting over. But I've been keeping an eye on things, and... Well, no one is being mean to her, but some of the girls do seem to be giving her the cold shoulder. Sometimes, it seems like they are changing the subject when she comes close, and sometimes they try to physically block her out of joining the group.

I can't imagine why they would. Mimi-chan is a sweet, strong girl. Sometimes she speaks too bluntly, and... Well, she can be a bit spoiled and demanding. But she's cheerful and friendly, she's fun and vivacious, and she's supportive. Why would people dislike her? Am I not seeing things clearly?

Oh, Mimi-chan also has very good tastes. We went shopping last Sunday. She had me try on so many things, but we found clothes that really work for me. Next Sunday, she's going to show me how she does her makeup. I've never been very good at that, so I'm excited. I bet my mother will like her, too.

I may be mistaken, but there might be some friction between Yagami-san and Ishida-san. I can see why, I suppose... Yagami-san is so energetic and open, and Ishida-san is so calm and distant. But I've overheard them snarling at each other a few times now. I hate to see them fight. It's a waste of their potential, and I feel like they have a lot to offer. I'm probably being presumptuous, though...

**15.05.15**

**Friday**

**Kido Jyou**

I'm so glad that Eimi-kun is sitting with us now. You won't believe what happened today. Koushiro-kun, Eimi-kun, and I were eating lunch, and guess who pulled up a chair to the other side of Eimi-kun's desk?

Tachikawa Mimi.

I'm being serious! She just walked over and asked to join us, but she was looking at Eimi-kun, who sort of... nodded automatically, like she was shocked, and who can blame her?! Tachikawa-kun sat down, and Takenouchi-kun joined her, and suddenly I'm caged in by girls, and Koushiro-kun sighed, and I would have kicked him if Eimi-kun hadn't been in between us.

The girls talked about America for most of the time, and I guess I just... listened. It's so nice, having those pretty voices all around you. And I was surprised to hear Tachikawa-kun talk. I hate to say this, but I assumed she would be kind of... ditzy. And I mean, I don't think she's a star student, but she's not vapid. She had a lot of interesting things to say about American schooling versus Japanese schooling.

I think she's trying to connect with Eimi-kun through shared experiences. I know it has nothing to do with me, but I still feel glad. And this is why I shouldn't focus on girls! I'll turn into a nonsensical idiot.

But I still hope she'll come back tomorrow... This could be bad.

**15/05/16**

**Saturday**

**Tachikawa Mimi**

Ugh! I can't stand it! No matter what I do, about half of the girls in my year are ignoring me. Why?! I can spot a faux pas when I see one. I didn't do anything!

So I decided that if the girls are going to be mean, I'll play with the boys. It's weird, there's like this divide between boys and girls in Japan. But we all mingled in the states, so why not?

I've talked to Eimi-chan. She's a little too mousey for her own good, but she's nice, and she has the sweetest puppy eyes. She's friends with Jyou-kun and Koushiro-kun, or at least, they sit together during lunch. So Sora-chan and I joined them for lunch, and hopefully we'll all be friends soon.

Lately, I've been able to get Eimi-chan to talk more. I finally realized that she's clamming up because she misses the states. Well, I mean, Sora-chan told me that was why. If I'm homesick, I want to talk about it, but Sora-chan said it hurts some people to talk about stuff like that. Isn't that weird? I always feel better when I talk. How else do you get it out?

Anyway, I think Eimi-chan and I can be close, like Sora-chan and me, and I think Sora-chan likes her, too. As for the boys, Jyou-kun is alright. I like how overwhelmed he was when Sora-chan and I sat down, haha! His eyeballs almost popped out of his face. Poor boy! This is what happens when you don't ever interact with the ladies.

As for Koushiro-kun, he's kind of a jerk. I tried to include him, but he acted like he didn't hear me. Eventually, Eimi-chan nudged him, but he only looked up from his book long enough to say like three words to her and blink at Sora-chan and me.

Uh, hello? Rude much?! I wonder why Eimi-chan bothers... At first, I think she was trying to get him to pay attention, but then she kind of shifted to pulling the conversation away from him. I just want to include everyone... It's not my fault he's antisocial.

Well, fine. Sora-chan, Eimi-chan, and Jyou-kun are nice, so forget him.

**15.05.17**

**Sunday**

**Izumi Koushiro**

Between computer club and the sudden influx in our lunch group, my social involvement has spiked too high for my tolerance. The only way to compensate is to stay up later. I need to decompress by working on my own. However, my mother has expressed concern over my late hours, and I'm not sure how to satisfy both parties.

I'd be grateful that Anami-san tries to act as a buffer between myself and Tachikawa-san, but I suspect that Tachikawa-san is present because of Anami-san.

Still, I've never had someone take my part in a social situation before. It's been... surprising.

I don't want to reflect on this further. There's something I'd like to add to my program.

**Cultural Notes:**

**-Golden Week: **I didn't bother having the kids talk about it, but there was no May 1 update because the first week of May is Golden Week in Japan. The week is filled with back-to-back holidays, and many work places are closed. Because the adults are off, many children are pulled out of school for vacations, and many teachers take off, too! Basically, no one was around, so I took a week off from updating XD

**-Skin whitening product:** Yep, that's totally a thing in Japan. Pale skin is often considered desirable, so they have all kinds of products to lighten skin tone. Women will sometimes carry a parasol or wear long sleeves all year round to avoid tanning.

**-Shoujo anime:**Anime aimed at young girls (as opposed to shonen anime, which is aimed at boys).

**-Fan club:** As Taichi states, it's a shoujo anime cliche for the most popular boy in class to have a fan club of over-zealous girls devoted to him. There is often bullying involved; if a girl gets too close to the idolized boy, the other girls will pick on her to make her back off. This is meant to keep the coveted boy single, and thus available for everyone.

I haven't looked into this too much, so don't quote me, but I heard this is an exaggeration of actual bullying problems in Japanese schools, which can be pretty… shocking. Google bullying in Japan if you're interested (but know that not every child is a bully, obviously!).

**-Genkan: **The shoe cubby area. Also the word for the entry way to the home, where shoes are removed.

Thanks for reading, guys! Next update is Seeking Resonance. I'm hoping to update on Friday, but I can't promise it. Within a week, though!

Also, I fell a little behind on replying to reviews, but I will get to it soon! Thank you so much, everyone!


	4. May 3

**Voices**

May 3: May 18th-24th

**15/05/18**

**Monday**

**Tachikawa Mimi**

So. SO.

Eimi walked up to me with the weirdest look on her face today. She said, "Mimi-kun, can I talk to you?" And I was like, uh, obviously I need to know whatever's going on in your head, girl. Do you expect me to say no when you look so silly?

It took her a while to get to the point, but she finally said, "I overheard some of our classmates saying they hate you because you're with Ishida-kun, and I thought you should know."

It felt like someone slapped me! I didn't know whether to scream or laugh! I think I did something in the middle- that would explain why Eimi-chan stepped back. Poor girl! I ended up ranting at her. It's always this way, ugh! People just pair up people based on how they look! Ishida-kun and I are gorgeous, so we must be together. Geez, I've hardly ever spoken to him!

Is this _seriously_ why some of the girls have been snubbing me all this time?! Can you believe it?! Naturally, I put my lunch down, marched right over to the girls who've been snotty to me, and gave them a piece of my mind!

And you know the most infuriating thing? Even though I was scolding them, they looked so happy when I said there's nothing between me and Ishida-kun. Ugh! Have some pride, ladies! Don't pin everything on a boy! Make sure you're someone you can respect first!

Ugh, that is IT! I'm so mad! These girls are lovesick sheep. Until they're young women again, I'll just hang with Sora-chan and Eimi-chan, and make sure they know how awesome they are on their own!

XOXOXO

Mimi

**15/05/19**

**Tuesday**

**Takenouchi Sora**

We started the first lab in our science course. I was nervous because I've never touched these instruments. We had labs in middle school, but the materials were so basic. Suddenly, I'm surrounded by flasks and beakers and burners, and it's a little intimidating. Anyone who has done ikebana knows how the slightest twitch of your fingers can destroy a piece. It seems like the lab would be the same way, except with chemicals and flames instead of petals and stems.

But I was paired with Ishida-san. We've been classmates for a few weeks, but I've hardly heard him speak. I don't think he has any friends... Although Eimi-san mentioned that his band has formed, so I suppose he has that. The only time he seems to speak is when teachers call on him, or when Yagami-san tries to chat with him. That... never seems to go well.

So, I suppose I'm still nervous. Ishida-san seems to be calm and steady, which is good in a lab setting. But I don't know if I'll be able to talk to him. I hope we can get along...

**May 20, 2015**

**Wednesday**

**Anami Eimi**

Dear Kitty,

I'm so lucky! I'm lab partners with Koushiro-kun! Everything is sure to go well. I was hoping I'd be paired with him, Jyou-kun, or Sora-san. Speaking of, Jyou-kun was paired with Yagami-kun... Oh, dear. Oh, dear! Jyou-kun went so pale! I hate to say it, but I nearly choked trying not to laugh. Even Koushiro-kun cracked a smile, and isn't that nice to see? (Sorry, Jyou-kun!).

Okay, so... I really hope I made the right choice here, but I joined Yamato's band (he insists on dropping honorifics among bandmates). So far, practices have been... Interesting. It's Yamato's band, but there's some posturing among the members, especially Hiro, the guitarist. I feel like they're trying to establish the hierarchy or something.

Which is kind of funny, since Yamato wants to name us "The Teenage Wolves." Honestly? I had trouble stopping myself from laughing. I suggested The Motley Penguins, but no one liked it... I guess penguins aren't cool enough?

It's okay. I don't mind being at the bottom of the pack. I just want to learn, sing, and have a place to belong. I like how small the group is, and I like that we're all first years. I bet Yamato did that on purpose- he wouldn't want senpais to look up to in his own band, yeah? Man, he's proud.

We're just starting out, so I have no idea what our songs are supposed to sound like yet. But still... I'm looking forward to the ride.

Yours,

Eimi

**15.05.21**

**Thursday**

**Izumi Koushiro**

If I had known that we were expected to sing in music class, I would have taken calligraphy instead.

I suppose it was foolish of me, but... The rules governing music are very clear and universal. I know the theory, and it translates into instructions of varying complexity, just like math and programming. Of course, there is a talent and skill factor that I lack, but I assumed basic effort would compensate in a high school elective.

Simple melodies on recorders and pianos are no problem. But singing? I suppose I could get by singing in a group, but by myself? This is going to be humiliating.

We've been reviewing the basics and warming up as a class, and we started individual work today. Naturally, no one volunteered when our teacher asked who wanted to have their range tested first. Finally, she looked at me and started struggling to remember my name- teachers for electives often have that problem. Anami-san raised her hand, and the teacher called on her, instead.

I don't know anything about vocal ranges, but even I can distinguish a good vocal performance from a poor one. Anami-san sings beautifully. I was shocked. It's jarring to suddenly discover so much talent in someone who trips while changing her shoes and always forgets her handkerchief.

I shouldn't be so surprised. I know better than to rely on appearances, but... well, I was still taken aback.

As much as I'd hate to ask, I wonder if she would be willing to prepare me for my own vocal trial? It would be embarrassing, but less so than floundering in front of everyone. I hope we move on to something else soon...

**15/05/22**

**Friday**

**Yagami Taichi**

Today in soccer practice, the coach split us up into first year groups and upper classmen groups. He wants to see the new blood in action against his regulars, I guess.

The older boys are good. Really good! Strong opponents really pump me up, and it's great to struggle against people who are actually on your side. Lets you know you can count on them. We have a killer defense. I'm going to make sure we have a killer offense, too. There's still time to piece things together before the first tournament.

So I almost didn't notice, since I was focused on the game, but Takenouchi watched some of it. She just sat on the far end of the grass and watched. I guess she likes soccer? Maybe that's why her legs are so toned. But don't we have a girl's soccer club?

Weird. I'll ask her when I get the chance. If she wants to play, she shouldn't just sit there alone. I'll play with her, if there's some reason she can't join the club.

Oh yeah- I'm partnered with Kido for the lab part of my science class. Sweet! Maybe I'll get a decent grade this year! I'll have to deal with the nerd king, though... Eh, how bad can it be?

**15.05.23**

**Saturday**

**Kido Jyou**

Just shoot me now and get it over with.

Out of all the people I could have had for a lab partner- Koushiro-kun! Eimi-kun! Literally anyone else, or no partner at all!- I was paired with Yagami-kun.

I don't think I can explain this well enough to you. Yagami-kun dozes off during class, rarely does his homework, doesn't take notes, and doesn't care about the time he's wasting in class when teachers scold him. From what I can tell, his whole world revolves around soccer and flapping his mouth at people.

And that's alright. It takes all kinds. But not when my grade is on the line! Koushiro-kun and Eimi-kun are so lucky, being paired up together. This will be a piece of cake for them, but I'll be babysitting while I try to do experiments.

Life just isn't fair sometimes. You can prepare and study all you want, but some outside factor can destroy all of that effort. I think that's a big cause of unhappiness- chance derailing your plans.

I'll have to work extra hard to compensate for Yagami-kun. That's just the bottom line.

**15/05/24**

**Sunday**

**Ishida Yamato**

I formed this band and chose the members, so I thought it would be understood that I'm in charge. But there's been a lot of jostling during practices. Hiro is especially bad about it, questioning everything everyone says and being a hot shot.

The good news is that Eimi has a mellowing effect on the boys. I thought having a girl around would just be a distraction, but no one seems to see her that way. She mostly just listens if we're not working with her, but if the interruptions turn into arguments, she's suddenly right next to us. It usually goes, "That's a good point, Hiro. But what does everyone else think?"

Am I a bad leader? Why do I need a meek girl to nudge the power back to me? I'm not trying to dominate or cut other people out of creating our songs and our sound. I'm just trying to keep us working as a unit.

I shouldn't worry so much. It's probably just that this is new for all of us. We're all feeling each other out.

Musically, we're all solid. Probably Akihiko, our keyboardist, is the least skilled, but it's easy enough to ramp up the difficulty of his parts while he improves. Eimi's been reviewing his lyrics, and thank God, she cuts out the senseless bits and makes replacements. Usually he's okay with it, since she seems to capture what he was going for in words that aren't gibberish, but sometimes we have to keep crap like "hope blue," "my love is a jacket," and "riding a current of rage" to keep him happy.

Eimi told me she's writing down everything she cuts for posterity. She's... got a weird sense of humor.

I want to make some changes to a song, so that's all for now.

**Cultural Notes:**

**-Girl on girl bullying: **The social snubbing/bullying that Mimi experiences here is kind of a shoujo anime trope, especially when there is a popular boy at the center of everything. I don't know how common it is in real life, but it sure is exploited a lot in entertainment.

**-Handkerchief**: Restrooms in Japan do not offer paper towels and blow dryers. Everyone carries a handkerchief to dry their hands with after using the sink. You can see Koushiro drying his hands with his handkerchief after using the Yagami bathroom in _Our War Game_, then stuffing it back in his pocket (this is right after Taichi blue screens the computer).

Eimi grew up in the states, so she often forgets to bring a handkerchief (she probably had to buy some when she arrived- I know I've never owned one).

Kind of a light week this time! Got a few interesting plot points lined up for next week, mostly centered around gym class in Japan. Seeking Resonance will be updated on Friday, so please stay tuned!


	5. May 4

**Voices**

May 4: May 25th-31st

**March 25, 2015**

**Monday**

**Anami Eimi**

Dear Kitty,

Oh no. No no no. Nope. _Nope._ Noppity.

Our school has a pool. I always assumed it was there for the swim clubs, but apparently we use it during gym class in summer? We have uniform swim suits and everything!

Whyyyy? First of all, I already have to change into my gym uniform in a classroom full of other girls. I can deal with stripping to my underwear, but do I have to strip naked in front of everyone to put on a swim suit? Then I get to _wear_ the swim suit in front of everyone, including the boys. And I'm so much bigger than the other girls…!

At least I know now. We won't use the pool until summer, which starts in late June. I have some time to lose weight. It's only enough time for about five pounds, but every little bit helps.

The most annoying part is that I already know how to swim. I mean, I'm not going to win any competitions, but I can do the breast stroke fine. I'm on top of the whole 'not drowning' thing. Man, we never did this in the states. I wonder if it's because Japan is a bunch of islands…? Maybe they figure everyone is more likely to encounter water. I don't know.

And speaking of gym class, you won't believe what happened to me the other day. They have these things called "tobibako" in Japanese gym class. It's a vaulting horse made of wooden frames, and you stack more and more of them to increase the difficulty. You take a running start, jump off a spring board, lean forward, slap your palms on top of the horse, spread your legs parallel to the ground, clear the jump, then land on the floor on the other side of the horse.

Everyone here has been doing this since elementary school, but I've never seen one of these suckers in my life. My first jump was an absolute disaster. My palms hit the top of the horse, but my legs weren't high enough. My thighs smacked the sides, my chest toppled forward into the front of the horse, but I had already pushed off with my palms. My body kept going. I flipped over and landed in front of the horse on my tush.

There was this awful, never-ending moment of silence while my whole class stared at me. I could feel my face getting so hot. But then Yagami-kun started laughing, and he came up to me and hauled me to my feet. I don't know why, but when I saw him laughing, I realized that it _was_ pretty funny, and I started laughing, too. He slapped an arm around my shoulders, which is pretty uncommon here, but I guess that's just Yagami-kun. Before I knew what was happening, he told the teacher he would work with me, and we were in a corner of the gym, practicing away from the rest of the class.

I thought Yagami-kun was kind of thoughtless and callous because he doesn't care about classes and homework, but it turns out he's pretty nice! His priorities are just different, I guess. And you know, that was the first time anyone's touched me since I came to Japan. It was such a little thing, but that moment of physical connection made me feel less alone.

Before the class was over, he was also helping Jyou-kun and Koushiro-kun. I was jumping, so I didn't see what happened with them, but I hope they didn't fail as hard as I did. Things were going well until Yagami-kun said something terrible. When I thanked him for his help, he grinned and said, "No problem! I need all of you at your best for sports day!"

Sports day?! What fresh hell is this? C'mon, Japan. _C'mon! _What more do you want from me?!

It turns out that Japanese schools have a day devoted to the classes competing in sporting events. We called this field day in the states, but it's apparently a bigger deal in Japan. Ours was just a few games of tug-of-war and sack races followed by popsicles, but apparently they have marathons and three-legged races and all kinds of events that are scored competitively.

Yaaaaaay.

You know what? I'm going to think about something else now.

I couldn't believe it, but Koushiro-kun asked me to give him singing lessons. We're learning about singing in our music class right now, and we have to sing in front of everyone, and a lot of people aren't comfortable with that. I figured he would be one of them, but I never expected him to ask me for help. I'm sorry he's having trouble, but I'm happy, because he can be hard to talk to. Sometimes I have to research whatever topic we last discussed, so that I can contribute something to our next science conversation! He's a really hard person to make friends with, so I'm glad we'll have a new way to interact.

Anyway, we've been meeting in the music room after our clubs for about half an hour. He's… I can see why he wanted help. Honestly, I think his voice is kind of adorable. This would probably offend him, but he has a feminine voice, high pitched, gentle, and with soft inflections (sometimes they're so subtle that it's… kind of a monotone). I think his range could soar into the highest tenor territory, but, well… He's so _stiff_. I keep trying to explain how to breathe from the diaphragm, how to stand, and how to shape your throat and mouth to support certain notes, but… This just really isn't his thing. Singing is a very open, personal process. You're dipping into yourself and creating sound with your body, and you color it with your emotions. If you don't express emotions in your speech, how can you express them while singing?

Well, maybe the exposure to singing in front of me will help him relax in front of the class. I'll help him for as long as he wants. It feels nice to be helpful, and to be treated as an authority on something. Besides, I like Koushiro-kun. There's something special about quiet, private people. It's so nice when they let you in or show you a different side of themselves, even in a small way. I hope I'm not reading into it too much. Maybe he just needs help for the class, and isn't interested in being friends.

I don't know, but I'm having fun.

Yours,

Eimi

**15/05/26**

**Tuesday**

**Takenouchi Sora**

It's difficult to be an underclassman sometimes. I understand the importance of respecting our seniors, but no one likes spending the first half of each club meeting chasing after tennis balls and being on hand to help. We have to stay after to clean up, too... Well, that's just how it works. Next year, those duties will pass on to the new first years.

But I never have enough time to work my body. I'm just starting to feel primed when it's time to leave. I've been watching the soccer clubs after our practices and wishing I could play, too. We have a few of them at different competitive levels, and for boys and girls, but I always end up at our top tier club.

They're so talented, it's mesmerizing. You should see Taichi-kun play. It's rare for a first year to make the starting lineup, but I can see why he did. He's fearless on the field, turning every play into a game of chicken. I always think he's being too aggressive, or that he's going to foul someone, but he reads his opponents perfectly. He always sidesteps at the last second.

He caught up with me at the end of one practice, and we talked for bit. He offered to play with me, and I can't believe he still had energy after rocketing around the field for so long. I felt a little bad for pushing him, but I couldn't say no. I've been wanting to play with him for a while, but I didn't know how to ask.

It was really something. I've never been pushed like that on the field, although I suppose I haven't played competitively since being injured in elementary school. He plays with so much focus and intensity.

He said I should call him by first name, and that he's always willing to play. I had a feeling that he's a nice person. He's a lot better than me- I'm very out of practice- but he didn't look bored at all.

I just wish Ishida-kun could see Taichi-kun's good side. It's a vicious cycle with them. Taichi-kun will be too forward or loud or personal for Ishida-kun's tastes, Ishida-kun will push back, and Taichi-kun will switch from too friendly to too aggressive in an instant. You should have seen the look on Ishida-kun's face when Taichi-kun called him "Yamato." Just his first name, no honorific. Ishida-kun definitely took it as disrespect. They started arguing, and thankfully our math teacher walked in before it escalated.

It's strange to see Ishida-kun lose his temper. He's very calm, quiet, and respectful during our labs. He's smart, too. His interpretation of the experiment is always a bit deeper and more thorough than mine.

I can't get a read on him, so I talked about it with Eimi-chan during lunch. She thought about it for a while, then said, "He's kind of complex. If he's having fun and making music, he's mellow and funny. If he's neutral, he's quiet and distant. If you step on his pride, run. That dog won't hunt, monsignor."

I'm not quite sure what that last part meant, but I think I get the idea. I'd like to see what Ishida-kun is like when he's enjoying himself. He tends to be pretty focused during the labs, but I admire how careful he is with the instruments, and how he calmly tries to figure things out when he's stumped. I wonder if I could watch a band practice? Probably not...

I think our lunch group is growing more friendly. Eimi-chan is talking more, and Mimi-chan seems to get a kick out of tutoring Kido-san. I can see why... Kido-san is very smart, so it's a novelty to teach him (Mimi-chan speaks English fluently because she spent middle school in the states). Plus, he's... Well, he's got a crush on her. It's very obvious, and very cute. I think Mimi-chan might be going a little overboard teasing him, though. She leans in so close to him over his workbook. I hope she's not giving him any wrong impressions. But Mimi-chan is naturally friendly; she's not doing it on purpose. Should I mention it? I don't want to offend her...

I wonder how Izumi-san goes so long without speaking? Wouldn't that be lonely? At least he talks to Eimi-chan and Kido-san sometimes. All I can really say about him is that he's quiet, he likes to read, and his lunches make me drool on sight.

I thought my mother didn't want me to join the tennis club, but I overheard her on the phone the other night. She told her friend that she was in the tennis club in high school, and that she's really looking forward to my first game.

I was so shocked! I wonder why she didn't tell me that? Should I bring it up myself?

Maybe I'll ask Mimi-chan for an opinion... It's kind of hard to talk about this, though.

**15.05.27**

**Wednesday**

**Izumi Koushiro**

I'm exhausted.

Between the crowd at lunch, computer club, and vocal lessons with Anami-san, by the time I come home, I need to be alone for a few hours. My parents give me space and privacy, but my mother isn't fond of my late hours. I don't know how to explain to her that I value time working alone more than sleep. I was able to place much more time into my programming projects in middle school and elementary school. The irony is that the older, more intelligent, and more experienced I become, the less time I have to utilize my skills.

I fear I might have led Anami-san to believe that we're closer than we are. She used to restrict our conversations to mutually interesting topics, but she's been asking about my life and talking about herself lately. I think the singing lessons made the difference. She's been asking me to call her by her first name, as well.

Is there a way to distance myself without hurting her feelings? She doesn't deserve that, but I'm already overtaxed as it is.

Luckily, our singing unit ends soon. With Anami-san's help, I've added a few notes to my range. I'm not sure that I sound any better- I know I'm a terrible vocalist- but perhaps I can focus on what I need to do physically when I perform, instead of my classmates.

Yagami-san is trying to convince Anami-san, Kido-san, and me to "train" on Sunday. This is tied to our mutually pathetic performances in gym classes, and I'd rather not expound on that. Anami-san seemed willing to entertain him, and I can't understand why. Kido-san and I are against it. Vehemently.

I want to program, but perhaps I should go to bed early tonight. I feel a bit light headed.

**15/05/28**

**Thursday**

**Yagami Taichi**

Yeesh. You drop one beaker, and King Nerd has a freaking conniption. It's not like it was a dangerous chemical. I told him he should lighten up. He'll end up with an aneurysm or a heart condition or something, seriously. Dude went blood red and girl-voiced, like someone kicked him in the balls.

I _said_ I was sorry. Besides, Eimi gave us some of her... chemical. Mixture. Whatever. By the time Jyou finished yowling like Miko when I step on her tail, she and Koushiro made more.

See? If you flip out, it just gets worse. We got it done. What's the big deal?

Whatever. At least Eimi talks these days. I guess it's because I'm teaching her how to jump? She never said anything to me before then. Isn't she in blondie's band? I wonder how she puts up with him. I thought he was going to deck me for calling him by his freaking name. It's so stupid- we're the same age. What's the point of honorifics? Too bad a teacher showed up before he could do anything. I'd love to take him down a peg.

Oh, so I asked Sora to play soccer with me after practice, and we've been hanging out a lot after our meetings since then. I love how she moves. It's so fluid and graceful. She just sweeps from one play to the next. It's like she makes mental adjustments before she has to make any physical changes.

Physically, she's not in the same shape that my teammates are, but she could improve. And holy crap, you should see her legs at work...! I thought they were awesome at rest, but this is another level.

I tried to ask her why she didn't join the soccer club, but she didn't seem to want to go there. Hmm. Maybe I'll ask again later? I hope I don't forget and blurt the question out whenever.

**15/05/29**

**Friday**

**Tachikawa Mimi**

So things are finally starting to change between me and the other girls in my class. I'm holding back because I'm angry, but I don't want it to be like this forever. I'll slowly branch out to include them, but I won't forget that Sora-chan was there for me, and Eimi-chan, too.

Actually, I'm keeping an eye on Eimi-chan. I think she's oblivious- if it isn't a book, music, Koushiro-kun, or Jyou-kun, she isn't interested- but I'm noticing some signs that she's being blacklisted now. It makes sense; Ishida-kun made her his manager after telling so many other girls that he didn't want one. What was he thinking? He's setting her up for social disaster, and she's too clueless to see the danger.

But they can't fool me now that I know what's going on. If things get ugly, I'll step in.

Oh, so Jyou-kun is just the cutest thing! I've never seen someone blush the way he does. It's so fun to tease him! He doesn't have natural style and presence like Ishida-kun, but he's open and approachable, and he doesn't start wars between girls. Okay, I know that isn't really Ishida-kun's fault, but I'm just mad.

Hm, I wonder what kind of boy I like? Boys like me. They don't approach me as much in Japan as they did in the states, but I can tell here, too. Still, somehow I've never thought about what kind of boy I'd like. I mean, I'm only fifteen, but don't people know that kind of thing?

Honestly, though? I'd rather be admired than admire someone else. I've seen how blind and stupid people can be when they're crushing on someone. I've got plenty of other things to think about, like our fashion club!

Speaking of, I saw Sora-chan's open sketchbook when I came over to do homework the other day. I really like her designs, but she seemed embarrassed. It turns out her mom runs an ikebana school out of their apartment. She's this well-known lady, strict, regal, quiet, and always wearing a kimono. Seriously, it was like seven PM on a Thursday, and she was sitting seiza at a low table and doing ikebana. The quiet in the apartment was so awful, I wanted to scream!

The arrangement was pretty, though.

Oops, I have to finish my homework. Ugh, it's so hardddd... Maybe I should call one of the girls?

XOXOXO

Mimi

**15/05/30**

**Saturday**

**Ishida Yamato**

Things are going a little better with the band. We decided to call ourselves The Teenage Wolves. Our songs are in the first stages of actually sounding like music now, and there are fewer interruptions. Even Hiro's getting too into playing to give anyone much crap.

I kind of feel bad that I set Hiro on Eimi for guitar lessons. He's such a hot shot, but she tolerates him a lot better than I would. And I think it's good for him. When he brags or tells her she's doing it wrong, she smiles and agrees with him. Anyone who hasn't completely lost their head to their ego has to feel a little embarrassed when their own bs gets parroted back at them. I wonder if she's doing it on purpose, or if she's just that meek?

I've been working with Sora-kun in our labs for science class. She's the third girl I've found who speaks to me without being flustered- Eimi's the same way, and I don't think Mimi-kun knows the meaning of embarrassment. I enjoy working with her. She seems quiet, thoughtful, and smart.

I just wish I knew what to talk to her about. I've developed ways of dealing with the smitten girls, but I'm not sure what to do when they're calm. It's starting to feel awkward, only ever talking about the experiments. I wonder if she's into music?

Speaking of girls and music... I keep finding more love notes and letters. Some of them are charading as lyric submissions, as if I ever asked for that.

Part of me does like the attention, but... I don't know, it's just getting ridiculous. Where does this persona that these girls love come from? Am I projecting it on purpose? None of them know me. They have no idea that I don't read their letters and poems and lyrics. They don't know that they're annoying me and weirding me out.

I could tell them, but I don't want to hurt their feelings. At least, that's what I tell myself, but is it possible that I actually don't want the attention to stop?

No, forget it. I don't want to touch this with a ten foot pole.

Ugh. Yagami-kun called my name across the room the other day in between classes. Just my first name, no honorific, nothing. I almost lost it for a second. Who does he think he is, mocking me like that in front of everyone?! Sora-kun said something to me about Yagami-kun being friendly and informal, and not meaning it badly, but there are limits. He knows I don't like him. He knows we're not friends. He's goading me.

One of these days, he's going to push me too far. I can feel it. I don't want to snap and start a fight, but... I only have so much patience. At some point, I'll have to push back.

And knowing that I might lose it in front of everyone makes me dislike Yagami-kun even more.

Forget this. I have homework to do.

**15.05.31**

**Sunday**

**Kido Jyou**

Yagami-kun is going to be the death of me. He's either going to explode our lab station in my face, or he'll give me a heart attack. Either way, dead is dead.

He dropped the beaker with the reaction I spent the first ten minutes of class making. Then I had to clean it up before I could start over, and he was no help- he was too busy telling me to calm down and saying it wasn't a big deal.

Look, mistakes happen. Maybe I reacted too strongly. But Yagami-kun seriously needs to take responsibility for his mistakes and fix them instead of telling me there isn't a problem. Of course there's a problem! He lost the first ten minutes of our work, and now the next ten have to go towards cleaning broken glass and a chemical spill! That's not nothing! That's a hazard and a major time constraint for our experiment!

Thank God for Koushiro-kun and Eimi-kun. By the time I finished cleaning, they made another beaker with the same mixture and slipped it to Taichi. At least I can count on some people around here. In the end, we finished the experiment- barely.

The irony is that Yagami-kun cares about gym class. He insisted on teaching Koushiro-kun, Eimi-kun, and me how to jump. I know how, I just don't do it as well as some of the other kids. I'll receive a fine grade, and colleges are a lot more interested in my science grades than my physical education scores, especially because I want to be a doctor. Why did he feel the need to perfect our jumping? The experiments matter. The jumping doesn't.

In other news, I'm trying to form a study group. Our first round of tests is approaching, and we need to be prepared. I know we don't have much time on the weekdays, but we have half days on Saturday and a free day on Sunday. I'd like to have access to Koushiro-kun's math and science skills, and to Eimi-kun's English. I'm sure I have something to give in return. Eimi-kun seemed interested, but Koushiro-kun... Well, he visibly recoiled, if only a little. Sometimes I wonder if he actually likes us, or if he's just sticking with the most tolerable people to avoid being picked on.

Actually, I think he _is_ picked on a little. It's nothing major, but I think I saw someone elbow him in the hallway the other day. It was crowded... Maybe it was nothing. But talk about his intelligence and his computer skills is starting to spread, and I think people are labeling him as a nerd.

I've always hated that. Someone can be an idiot and a jerk, but if they're the star of a sports team, everyone loves them. But if your skills are mental, you're looked down on. Why is that? Are we perceived as threats?

I think it doesn't help that Koushiro is so small, and that he looks so... not Japanese. I can't tell what his background is, and he won't let me broach the topic. I could force it, but I don't want to make him uncomfortable.

Anyway... I wonder if Tachikawa-kun would be interested? I'm not sure I'm brave enough to ask... She still sits with us at lunch every now and then. I think I'm finally learning how to talk to her without... You know. Stumbling.

Uh, actually... She keeps telling us- all three of us- to call her "Mimi-chan." I mean, of course I _want_ to, but I've never called anyone "chan" before, and... I don't know if I can do it.

Ugh. I wish I were better with girls, like Ishida-kun...

**Notes: **

**The first year girls: **Yamato and Mimi are making it sound like all of their female peers are all over Yamato, but they're exaggerating. It's just enough of the girls to make it _feel_ like it's all of the girls.

**That dog won't hunt, monsignor: **Oh, Eimi. This is a rarely used saying from the American south. It basically means, "That won't work," or "that won't fly."

**He has a feminine voice:** Koushiro is voiced by a woman in both the Japanese and the English versions of the show. I thought he might switch to a male voice actor for Tri, since he's older now, but nope. Still a lady, and probably still totally adorable.

**No honorific:** In the canon, Yamato and Taichi address one another without honorifics. However, the situation is very different in Voices (I get into this more below, so scroll all the way down for an in-depth explanation if you're interested). Here, Taichi and Yamato are strangers with a slightly hostile relationship. It's considered insulting to address someone casually without having a strong relationship first, as this implies a lack of respect. While I believe Yamato is a supporter of a more lenient approach to honorifics, and Taichi absolutely is, the friction already in place between the two of them is exacerbating things.

**I've never called anyone "chan" before:** Jyou is implying that he's never been close to a girl before. This probably also indicates that he has no close female relatives around his age or younger. Boys_ can_ call each other "chan," but it's... That would be pretty quirky. "Chan" tends to be reserved for girls.

If a girl calls a boy "chan," it usually implies that they are dating. However, this can also be done teasingly, and sometimes childhood friends call each other "chan."

**Sitting seiza, low table: **Seiza is a sitting posture where the legs are folded directly beneath the person's thighs and tush. It can be pretty hard on your legs. In the states, our tables are fairly high, and we use chairs to sit at them, but Japanese tables are often close to the ground. You generally sit on a cushion. Some households have one type of table or the other, and some have both.

Thanks so much for reading, everyone! I also really want to thank everyone who is reviewing. Feedback is a huge motivational force for fanfiction authors. I really appreciate when readers take the time to let me know that they're engaged, and to discuss what's engaging them. Thank you!

**A note on my honorifics usage, and on my treatment on canon:**

(If you're not interested in this stuff, please feel free to skip this. It's just here for readers who may have questions about how I address them).

I don't always use the canon honorifics in Voices. This is a reflection of the changed conditions of my AU relative to the canon. In Digimon Adventure, the kids are much more lax in their honorifics (except for Koushiro, who uses "san" for almost everyone). This is because the kids are in elementary school, and most of them know one another already (Taichi, Sora, and Koushiro were in the soccer club at the same school). Their dangerous situation probably also has something to do with this. Who has time to say "san" when Kuwagamon is trying to decapitate everyone?

In Voices, the kids are all strangers, which makes them more formal. Additionally, as high school students, they are expected to be more precise and respectful in their honorific usage. It's common for kids in the same grade to refer to one another as "last name-san" in real life, especially when they are beginning a new school career together.

As in real life, the kids will grow more lax and familiar in their language as they grow closer; first years are generally more likely to use "san" with each other than third year students. And of course, some characters are more formal than others. In Voices, Koushiro calls everyone "last name-san" for now, Jyou universally uses "kun," Eimi and Sora start out formally but are happy to ease into friendlier language, Yamato uses "kun" until he has permission to ditch honorifics, and Taichi tries to ditch honorifics entirely. If you read carefully, you can pick up on some subtle preferences, some characters switching to first name and less formal honorifics for certain people, but being more formal with others. Over time, the kids will move towards addressing one another casually. (I'm likely to goof up in some spots, though, oops!).

But culturally, dropping an honorific prematurely can be deeply insulting, as we saw in today's episode.

Also, as a general note on canon... I've been a Digimon Adventure fan for 16 years, so it's a pretty good bet that I know a lot of the canon stuff. I can't know everything, because I haven't heard all of the drama CDs or read all of the light novels, and I totally make mistakes sometimes, but I'm fairly solid. If I deviate from the canon, it's probably either to reflect a circumstance of the AU, to turn the issue into a future plot point, or just because I felt like it.

Hopefully that explains where I'm coming from? XD XD I hope I'm not being confusing or needlessly complicated.


	6. June 1

**Voices**

June 1: June 1st-7th

**15/06/01**

**Monday**

**Ishida Yamato**

Turns out that Sora's easy to talk to, after all. All I really had to do was break the ice. I mentioned my band- not trying to impress her, just trying to talk- and she seemed interested. Before long, we were talking about traditional Japanese music, which she said her mom plays all the time. I'm not a huge fan, but I can hold a conversation about it.

She's in the tennis club. I can see that... She's very trim and athletic. Don't they wear little white skirts when they play? It would suit her. I wonder when their first game is?

I wonder when my band will be able to actually perform? I'd like to participate in some local contests and shows, but there's no point to rushing in and bombing. I want to be a strong contender for the main stage at the culture festival, but that's months away. Still, we can't sit on our thumbs until then.

I guess I'll have to think about it.

**June 2, 2015**

**Tuesday**

**Anami Eimi**

Dear Kitty,

Man, tests are coming up... I have to study hard. I've learned so many kanji and done all of my homework and studied everyday, so I hope I can be on the same footing as the other kids.

I went to Jyou-kun's apartment last Sunday to study with him. I was hoping Koushiro-kun would come, too, but he didn't, even though he lives in the same building. I felt a little sad... Jyou-kun was wondering if maybe he doesn't like us much after all, and it kind of brought me down. He likes us, right? I mean, we like him…

Jyou-kun is a good study buddy, though. He helped me figure out some math stuff. His apartment is really big and nice...! Apparently, his dad and his two older brothers are all doctors, or doctors-in-training. Wow! No wonder Jyou-kun is so focused on his schooling. I wonder if it's a lot of pressure? No one's ever asked me what I want to do.

What _do_ I want to do? I honestly don't know. I'd like to work with animals or the environment, but I'm not physically fit, and it doesn't pay well... I don't want to be greedy, but I have to be able to support myself on my own. That's important to me.

Oh, speaking of, I'm the manager of The Teenage Wolves, yeah? Yamato mentioned wanting to perform. Should I try to draw up a schedule for when people should learn certain parts, and research contests and stuff? That's all... managerial, yeah? I worry about stepping on Yamato's toes. I'm not sure if he'd be big on delegating.

But geez, I'd like to contribute. So far all I've been doing is writing and tweaking lyrics. I wonder if I could do research while the boys are playing? Maybe there's internet access in the computer club room?

Speaking of... I'm a little worried about Koushiro-kun. He's been even quieter than usual, and he hasn't been eating all of his lunch, even though it looks so good. I asked Jyou-kun what he thought, but he said he hasn't noticed a difference. I've asked Koushiro-kun if he's okay, and he always says yes without looking up from his book.

I feel kind of sad. I'm glad I have shopping with Mimi-chan and Sora-chan to look forward to this weekend, although I guess I don't have much money... My mom sent me some, but I have to use it wisely.

I really want a new circle skirt, and they've been releasing so many cute things in macaroon colors this season. But if I want to grab dinner with the boys after practice, or get an ice cream or whatever sometimes, I can't blow it all on one skirt.

Maybe I don't feel much better after all...

Maybe I'll try to talk to Taichi-kun tomorrow. He's always happy. He'll probably try to make me jog with him or something, though... But then, swimsuit season is coming up, so...

Yeah, this isn't helping. Later.

Yours,

Eimi

**15/06/03**

**Wednesday**

**Takenouchi Sora**

I'm so relieved. I'm finally able to talk to Yamato, and we've started getting along well once he made it clear that I'm welcome to approach him. He's not nearly as distant as I thought he might be- he already invited me to call him by his first name. I was surprised at how well-rounded he is. He seems to know a little bit about a lot of topics, and it's nice to listen to him talk. At first, he can be a little tense, but once he relaxes, his voice goes mellow and smooth, and it's a wonderful sound.

I keep trying not to notice how blue his eyes are, and I mean that very literally. They always seem to be a different shade of blue. How does that work? Is it the lighting? And I've never seen such blond hair before. I don't want to focus too much on how he looks, because other girls do and I can tell it annoys him sometimes, but… Well, he's handsome. There's no point in denying it. I just can't let it distract me.

I'm already so distracted by my mother… There's an ikebana convention coming up at Tokyo Big Sight, and she wants to me go with her and make pieces to represent the Takenouchi school. I don't mind manning the table for her, but I don't want to make any pieces. I'm just not good enough at ikebana, and… Well, I'm trying to distance myself from the art and the school. I don't want to upset my mother, but I don't think ikebana is in my future.

I wish I had someone to talk to about it… I want to talk to Mimi-chan, but… I don't want to be rude, but she can be insensitive, especially about family issues. She talks about her parents often, and apparently they dote on her and give her whatever she wants. I'm not sure she'll be able to understand me. Maybe Eimi-chan could, but it's hard to approach her about serious issues. She has a way of deflecting anything serious.

I don't really know what to do.

**15.06.04**

**Thursday**

**Izumi Koushiro**

Thankfully, the singing unit is behind me. My performance was far from good, but it wasn't at the absolute bottom end of the spectrum. It escaped notice, which is all I hoped for. I'm able to return home directly after computer club now.

Anami-san has been asking me if I'm well lately. I do feel sluggish, but I wonder how she noticed? I tell her I'm fine, but she continues to inquire. Why? At least Kido-san only requires a single assurance. The continual questions bother me. I don't understand Anami-san's concern, and it makes me uncomfortable.

I was hoping my peers would prove more mature in high school, but this was apparently optimistic. Some students have been knocking into me in the hallways, and especially in the genkan. It's mild, as far as bullying goes, but these things tend to escalate over time.

At least I've learned how to identify and avoid bullying types over the years.

I can't help hoping that puberty will have some discernible effect on my body soon.

**15.06.05**

**Friday**

**Kido Jyou**

I really don't have time for this this week. Tests are coming up!

The quick version of life right now: I didn't have the guts to ask Mimi-chan to study on Sunday, Mimi-chan insists that I switch to using 'chan' for herself and 'her girls,' Taichi-kun hasn't exploded anything recently, Koushiro-kun is ignoring us, and I think it's hurting Eimi-chan's feelings, and I guess I'm not in the best mood with him because of it.

And my notes won't study themselves, so that's all.

**15/06/06**

**Saturday**

**Yagami Taichi**

Damn it. I have a thing for Sora, don't I?

At first I thought I was just kind of attracted to her. Happens all the time, you know? No big. But today, she said she was tired after my practice. Instead of playing, we sat down on the grass and just talked. Honestly, I was a little bummed at first, since I like playing with her, but… Well… This was nice, too.

It was weird. She looked… Man, I don't know how to describe it! She was smiling, but her eyes were, like… Looking far away. At first she was so quiet, and I just rambled, you know, filling the silence. But eventually she started answering questions and contributing, and…

It seems like she has a lot on her shoulders. She was talking about how her mom wants her to do an ikebana exhibit for the Takenouchi school, and how she doesn't feel like she can make something worth exhibiting. She said she wants to refuse, but doesn't want to disappoint her mother. And apparently the tennis club is some kind of compromise with her mom? Her mom doesn't want her to play soccer because she was injured in the past?

I was pissed at her mom. Injuries happen in sports, and Sora's wasn't a big deal. It healed up fine, no marks or anything. Why shouldn't Sora do what she wants to? Why does she listen to her mom? Can't she just say no and do what she wants?

I asked her why she cares so much about what her mom wants, and Sora was quiet for a while. Then she smiled, and I'm not kidding, the sun was setting behind her, and her hair lit up with it, and it smelled like summer, all earthy and stuff, and- well- I'm not a poet, okay? But she was beautiful and sad, like a painting or something, and _damn it_.

She said, "I don't know. I guess it's because I love her."

And all I could think was, _this girl is beyond me. This girl is on another level, isn't she?_

Damn it! It was so much easier to deal with her when I just thought she was kind of hot and good at soccer! What am I supposed to do here?

I wonder if I know anyone who's good with girls, and who I can trust to keep their mouth shut…

**15/06/07**

**Sunday**

**Tachikawa Mimi**

Dear Diary,

I'm starting to make friends with everyone. Forgive and forget, right? _Wrong!_ Forgive, yes. Forget, no. Not because I'm mad anymore, but because I need to keep an eye out for repeat problems.

But so far, so good! I still like Sora-chan the best, though. Part of me wishes I could be mature and calm like she is, but you know what? I have too much fun being me to want to change!

But tests are coming up, and that's the opposite of fun, _ughhhh_. Eimi-chan mentioned studying with Jyou-kun, and I was like, "What! I want in on that!" Not because I want to study- _blech!_\- but because I'm behind after middle school in the states. I need all the help I can get. And this way, I get help and people at the same time.

I wonder if I'll be able to tease Jyou-kun? That's always fun.

So Eimi-chan, Sora-chan, and I went shopping today. I found all kinds of cute stuff for Eimi-chan, but she wouldn't actually buy anything. I was annoyed at first- what's the point of trying on clothes if you won't buy it? But Sora-chan pulled me aside and said that Eimi-chan probably just doesn't have money.

I guess I forget sometimes that not everyone gets an allowance. Eimi-chan says she lives with her grandmother, and sometimes old people don't have much to retire on, yeah? I wonder why she came here to start with. I tried to ask, but Sora-chan kept shaking her head behind Eimi-chan.

Augh! Why can't people just _talk_ about stuff? _So frustrating!_

Oh well...

XOXOXO,

Mimi

**Culture Notes:**

**-Culture festival: **Japanese schools from elementary through university level hold an annual culture festival, often on or around November 3rd, which is National Culture Day (the fairs are generally held on the weekend, sometimes one day, sometimes both). Preparations begin very early! Generally, each class is expected to do something as a unit, and many clubs host events, as well, so there is a lot going on. Common classroom fair offerings include plays, cafes, and haunted houses. If clubs want to perform or exhibit, they might have to compete for limited venue space, hence Yamato's concern about winning a time slot on the main stage in his school's auditorium.

**-Tokyo Big Sight:** A convention center in Odaiba. The place where Myotismon corralled the captured humans during his siege of Odaiba.

**-Taichi's practice on Saturday:** Taichi and company go to school for half days on Saturday, which is common in Japan. Whether or not they have club meetings on Saturday depends on the club, but a competitive sports club probably would.

It's one of those weeks where everyone mysteriously and universally decided to not write much. Translation: things got away from me this week, but I made it! Hah! XD

Thanks for reading!


	7. June 2

**Voices**

June 2: June 8th- 14th

**15/06/08**

**Monday**

**Takenouchi Sora**

I saw Izumi-kun slip on the stairs today. He almost fell, but Taichi-kun was behind him. He grabbed Izumi-kun's blazer, hauled him up, laughed, and whacked his back a few times. In retrospect, I should have asked Izumi-kun if he was feeling alright. It's so easy to overlook him, especially beside Taichi-kun, who calls so much attention to himself.

Speaking of Taichi-kun, I'm not sure how, but I ended up talking to him about the ikebana convention. I guess he doesn't seem the type to have a conversation like that with, but he asked an important question:

Why am I trying so hard to please my mother?

Of course, it's because I love her. But Taichi-kun is right to point out that I deserve to become my own person. I've decided to make just one arrangement. I'll try my best and ask my mother if it's honestly good enough to stand among the samples from her students. If it is, fine. If it isn't, I just won't be able to contribute. I can't focus so much on ikebana when I have exams and tennis, but I want to show her that I mean no disrespect towards her or the art.

I feel a lot better already.

I hate to admit to this, but I was really curious about Yamato's band. I peeked into the classroom that they practice in after my club. I wonder if they know that girls do that all the time? When I came, there were three pressed against the wall next to the window, glancing in when the boys were focused on playing.

I can't blame them; I did the same thing. Yamato seems more relaxed when he's playing. He smiles a lot more and seems comfortable with his band mates, joking around and talking smack like boys do.

And what is it about instruments that make the performer more attractive? Yamato's guitar is really beautiful. It's a bass with a dark blue gradient. You know, even the sound is kind of like him, deep and moody and in the background.

I didn't stay long, since more than a glance struck me as intrusive, so I left. I can't wait to hear them perform. They were practicing, so it wasn't perfect, but I think they'll sound good.

Mimi-chan said something about joining Eimi-chan and Kido-kun for a study session over the weekend. That's not a bad idea. I wonder if Yamato and Taichi-kun would be interested? I'd have to ask Kido-kun first.

**15/06/09**

**Tuesday**

**Tachikawa Mimi**

Dear Diary,

I knew Koushiro-kun was trouble! He up and left the group on Monday to eat by himself, and he didn't come back today. What's wrong with us, huh? And why would you want to eat by yourself, anyway? It would be so boring!

I wouldn't mind so much, except that Eimi-chan seems kinda bummed. I don't know why it makes a difference to her, since he doesn't talk, but I guess I'd be upset too if my friend bailed on me with no reason except that he felt like it.

Ugh! I don't like it when people make my friends sad. I can't figure out if I should try to get back at him, or if I should try to talk him into coming back so that Eimi-chan will feel better.

In other news, I found out that Sora-chan doesn't just design clothes... She can actually _make_ them! Can you _believe_ that?! I wish she had told me before, but it only came up as a coincidence.

I really wish she had joined the fashion club. I wonder if she can teach me? I want to come over and see the clothes she's made. If they're anything like her designs, they'll be super cute!

Man, Sora-chan is so talented. Ikebana, soccer, tennis, designing and making clothing, and she's smart, too... When I think about it, what can _I_ do? Does shopping count? How about doing my hair and makeup? I don't want to beat myself up about it, but I guess I don't really have many skills.

I wonder if I should start learning something? I just want to have fun... I already have those stupid exams coming.

Oh, right! I should talk to Jyou-kun about his weekly study party! Haha, he's so frazzled about the tests, it's hilarious. Maybe I shouldn't tease him so much about it, but it's so fun!

XOXOXO,

Mimi

**15.06.10**

**Wednesday**

**Kido Jyou**

Okay, what does Koushiro-kun think he's doing? He's acting like a jerk!

On Monday, he left our group at lunch. He said he wanted to eat on the roof, and when Eimi said that sounded fun, he said he was going alone so he could concentrate on his book.

He's been completely avoiding us since then.

I want to say it doesn't bother me, but it does. Even though he doesn't say much, I thought we were friends. But I guess he just wanted to avoid standing out by being a complete loner. So why change his mind a few weeks in? Does he think we're that annoying?

But I'll get over it. Eimi-chan and Mimi-chan are taking it harder. I think Mimi-chan just doesn't like him much to begin with. I hate to say this, but I think she's used to people noticing her and going out of their way for her, especially boys, because she's really pretty and charming. Then there's Koushiro-kun, who hardly glances at her, and who looks irritated when he does. Now she's offended by his deflection. She says things like, _"Leaving us?! For a stupid book?! Ugh! Can you get any ruder?"_

Eimi-chan seems genuinely hurt, which is worse. Sometimes she'll ask me if I think he's okay, or if I think he wants us to approach him. All I can say is, "I don't know," but she keeps asking. I'm guessing it's on her mind a lot.

I admit, I snapped at her today over it. She asked me if I thought he was okay for the sixth time this week, and I couldn't help it. I said, "I don't know, and I don't care. Why are you so concerned? He obviously isn't interested in us."

I know, I know. I feel terrible about it, and I apologized as soon as I realized what I had said. She looked kind of pained and asked if I really though that. I_ do_ think that, but obviously it's not what she wanted to hear. I hesitated.

I can't remember exactly what we said, but it went kind of like this:

"Don't you like him?" she asked. "I do."

"Well, I mean, I _did_. But it's hard when he's pushing us away like this."

"I know," she said. "But I don't think he's himself lately, and it's not like he has good social skills to begin with. I'm not sure if he's thinking straight. And anyway, we're his only friends, at least in this school. If we give up on him, then who does that leave?"

The only answer was no one, and that does seem pretty harsh. But isn't he doing this to himself? Is it really our responsibility to work hard at fixing our relationship and be snubbed in return, just because he doesn't have other friends?

Is Eimi-chan too nice, too idealistic, or too stubborn? Am I being mean? Sometimes I get too focused on my studies, or on everyone pulling their weight equally in every situation. I want to be fair, but realistically, aren't we all weak sometimes? Should I take that into consideration more before getting mad at Koushiro-kun?

This is all just great. Well, at least I know I have one friend I can count on in a pinch...

But seriously. Midterms are next week! I don't have time for all of this pointless drama!

**June 11, 2015**

**Thursday**

**Anami Eimi**

I feel like I shouldn't say it so bluntly, but I don't know how to ease into it. Koushiro-kun collapsed today during gym class.

It's technically not summer yet, but it's been so hot and humid. We were jogging outside, and it was _awful_. As usual, I was at the back of the pack, but Koushiro-kun was trailing behind even me.

I heard a thud, and when I turned around, he was face down on the track. It's weird, I panicked, but it felt far away. I didn't think at all, I just ran to him and turned him over. He was passed out, but breathing. I pulled him up, put his arm over my shoulder, and dragged him a few steps before anyone else reached us.

Taichi-kun and the teacher got there first, with Jyou-kun stumbling towards us in the background. I think they wanted me to let go of him, but I couldn't process what they were saying. In the end, Taichi-kun took his other arm and started hauling.

Anyway, Jyou-kun came with us because he's a nurse's aid, and the teacher had us carry him to the nurse's office. Jyou-kun kept trying to switch places with me, but I think I remember shaking my head and gripping Koushiro-kun harder. Isn't that weird? I think I had this idea that I'd never see him again if I let go, or that someone else wouldn't carry him properly, or… _something_. Stupid, I know, but I've never seen someone completely unconscious like that before. It scared me so much.

The boys hauled him onto a bed- I think Taichi-kun had to pry me off. It just happened, what's wrong with me? I should remember it better! Jyou-kun explained what happened, and the nurse told Taichi-kun and me to go back to class. I asked to stay, but only nurse's aides can miss class to help the nurse. I asked what was wrong with Koushiro-kun, but she shooed me out of the room.

But I heard her call an ambulance, and it felt like my brain froze over. Taichi-kun dragged me into a closet- yes, a closet, with mops and buckets. We talked, and I think he was trying to comfort me, or at least make sure I was okay- he kept giving me a bucket? I remember being annoyed, but at least he knocked me out of my panic. It was nice of him. My memory clears up around the time when we left the closet.

I tried to take really good notes for Koushiro-kun, but I was so distracted and shocked. It was so weird to me that the daily routine went on. One of our classmates is in the hospital, maybe still out cold, and we're supposed to sit here and translate sentences into English? It felt so wrong and surreal, but that's how the world works, isn't it? I kept glancing at Koushiro-kun's empty desk and feeling sick. Did anyone else feel that way? That's a normal reaction, right?

I didn't go to band. Instead, I gathered up Koushiro-kun's things, made copies of my notes, got the hospital information from the nurse, and went to visit him. You know what's sad? We're all classmates, but Jyou-kun had cram school and Taichi-kun's really serious about his soccer team. I know Koushiro-kun's hard to get to know, but why was I the only one to visit him? He was in the hospital! I didn't know if he'd ever wake up again!

I _knew_ there was something wrong with him these last few weeks! I wonder if he was trying to be alone because he wasn't feeling well? I hope he'll hang out with us again when he recovers. Mimi-chan, Taichi-kun, and even Jyou-kun seem to think that I shouldn't care about Koushiro-kun, since he's so prickly and anti-social, but... I don't think he's mean. I don't think he wants to hurt people. I think his brain is just... different, sunk into the information world instead of the social one. There's no need to exclude him because he doesn't have social skills.

Besides, sometimes, when he looks at me and speaks to me, I just... I can feel the weight of his intelligence and his talents, and it's amazing. And I can't help but think, _If no one connects to this kid, will all of that ability and talent go to waste?_ You could be the best singer in the world, but it wouldn't mean much without an audience. Koushiro-kun is smart, ridiculously smart,_ prodigy_ smart, but if he can't interact with or connect to anyone, will it all go to waste? I'd hate for that to happen.

Anyway... Thank goodness, he was awake when I saw him. I was so nervous and freaked out about what I'd find out in the hospital room, but he was sitting up and alert. Except for being hooked up to some IVs and looking pale and worn, he seemed okay.

He didn't say much, but his parents were there. His mom was really nice and friendly. She told me Koushiro-kun has pneumonia- he was hooked up to antibiotics, and also water, because of course he's dehydrated, because why bother taking care of himself?

Stars! Who the hell gets pneumonia in spring?! I'll tell you who! Idiots who don't eat and sleep for a few weeks! Stupid Koushiro-kun! What's the point of being able to derive complex equations in your head if you don't remember to eat and sleep and drink?!

Well, at least it wasn't serious. He didn't stay the night in the hospital- his mom asked for my phone number, and she called me to let me know when they sent him home. Apparently he passed out from exhaustion and the strain of being sick and hungry and thirsty.

I'm exhausted, too. I was worried all day, but I still had to act normal and take notes and stuff. I shouldn't have panicked so much, but whenever someone says "hospital," I think it's hard to stay calm. Even the sirens scare me.

Should I tell Koushiro-kun how scared I was? Should I scold him for not taking care of himself? I'm afraid he'll think I'm overstepping my bounds, and, based on how other people reacted, I'm not sure if my behavior here is normal. Aren't you supposed to care about and visit your friends?

I can't think about it anymore. I just want to sleep.

Yours,

Eimi

**15/06/12**

**Friday**

**Yagami Taichi**

Yeesh! This week has been ridiculous.

Koushiro face planted on the track yesterday. I was on the opposite side of the circuit, and I saw him eat the dirt. Kid's lucky he still has skin on his nose.

Eimi got there first- she wasn't far ahead of him- and man, did she freak. She was checking his vitals and saying his name over and over, trying to wake him up, I guess, but he was _out_.

Being unconscious is bad. _Really_ bad. I carried Koushiro to the nurse with Eimi, who I think was on auto-pilot or something- her eyes were all big and glassy, and she just shook her head when I talked to her. Seriously though, dude weighs like fifty pounds- no wonder he fainted.

I wasn't surprised when the nurse called an ambulance. I was feeling pretty shitty, wondering if Koushiro would be okay. He didn't look so good, sort of chalky with gray under his eyes. Plus, it was pretty similar to what happened with Hikari years ago, so I guess I was stuck on that.

But I think Eimi felt worse. She was pale and just, like... Staring. Kind of like when dad drinks with his coworkers and comes home drunk and almost asleep. No focus. No awareness.

I didn't want to bring her back to class like that, so I tugged her into a closet. I guess that was kinda stupid of me- it looks sketchy, right? But I wasn't thinking about that stuff.

So we stepped around the brooms and buckets, and... Hrm, well, I guess it went kinda like this:

"You okay?" (That's me)

She blinked and nodded. Not good enough.

"You don't look okay." (Me again.)

"I'm worried. Why are we in a closet?"

"Because you look like you might puke." I handed her one of the buckets. I was trying to be funny, but I was also kinda serious.

"Have you ever seen someone faint like that?"

I froze for a second. _Seriously?_ It's like she plucked my thoughts out of my brain. I couldn't stop thinking about that time I turned around and Hikari was passed out on the dirt.

I nodded.

"Did that person need an ambulance? Were they okay?"

I nodded again. I could tell she was asking because she was scared, but I wished I had never dragged her into the stupid closet.

"Koushiro-kun will be okay, too. Right?"

"Yeah. Geez, he's fine. Relax. Probably just the heat. They'll take care of him." I started to hear the ambulance, and I tried to block it out. I_ hate_ that sound.

"Kids don't have any business being on ambulances or in hospitals..."

I saw Hikari's face in the dark, all pale and pinched, fighting to breathe. I nodded again and changed the subject. Damned coward...

"Why are you so worried anyway, Eimi?"

"What? We're friends and classmates. Aren't you worried, too?"

"Well, yeah. But not puke-worried."

"Taichi-kun. I'm not throwing up." She tried to hand the bucket over, but I didn't take it.

"I thought you guys stopped hanging out at lunch. Besides, Koushiro never talks anyway. Doesn't that annoy you?" It bugs me, trying to talk to him and being ignored. I can't dislike Koushiro, though. That annoyed face he makes is hilarious. Totally worth it.

"No, it doesn't. I need to get to class." She put the bucket down and put her hand on the doorknob, and I could tell that I had messed up somehow. I grabbed her shoulder before she marched out.

"He's going to be okay. Don't worry."

She looked at me for a while, then patted my hand. "Thanks, Taichi-kun."

Somehow, I don't think I actually helped.

I can't help but wonder... If I passed out, would any of my classmates come running like she did? Is Eimi like that with everyone, or just the people she hangs with at lunch? Just Koushiro? Are they, like... a thing, or whatever?

Nah, that's stupid. How could you be into someone who doesn't talk? And there's no way Koushiro could get a girlfriend before me. Maybe she's just nice. Maybe she's just protective of her friends.

Or I guess... Maybe that's not the first time an ambulance has taken someone she cares about away.

Shit. I'm going to go see if Hikari wants to do anything.

**15/06/13**

**Saturday**

**Ishida Yamato**

The band is doing well. We can play three songs from start to finish, but they need fine-tuning. Still, it's enough to do demo performances and give people an idea of what the band is about.

Eimi found me during lunch early this week with a list of contests and shows we could enter, registration forms for stage slots for the cultural festival, and a list of suggestions for how to prepare for performing. She really did her research. The contests were sorted by level of difficulty and historical turn-out (the more press and buzz, the better), the forms were complete except for signatures and song choices, and her schedule for learning parts was challenging without being impossible. I guess that's what she's been up to lately, scribbling in the corner of the club room.

It was weird, though. She kept apologizing for the work she did, and it makes me wonder if she feels pushed aside or like a bother at meetings. Of course, I'm glad to have this kind of clerical work taken care of. I guess I did need a manager after all.

It's a little annoying, but I had better try harder to include her... Or at least, I _was_ thinking that before she skipped practice on Thursday and Friday. She was visiting Koushiro-kun, who fainted on Thursday. At least she came back on Saturday.

If I were sick, it would be nice if someone came to see me, so I'll let it go. I wonder if the band would visit me? I think we're slowly becoming a team.

Whatever. Eimi said Koushiro-kun's recovering. It was really eerie to see him collapse. Good thing he's alright.

Sora invited me to study with her friends for our midterms tomorrow. I generally don't like to study in a group, but it might be a nice for a change. I think Jyou-kun is smart, and I know Sora is. Either way, it will help me put more effort into school. Sometimes I put too much focus on the band, you know?

**15.06.14**

**Sunday**

**Izumi Koushiro**

I'd rather not write about this, but I promised my mother that I would only exert myself for school work while I recover. I try to sleep and rest, but it's so monotonous. Technically, this is school work, and it will occupy me for a time.

I collapsed while my class was running during gym on Thursday. It felt strangely like falling asleep. I grew more sluggish and heavy with each circuit, until something switched off entirely.

I have vague impressions of being carried to the nurse's office and riding the ambulance, but I wasn't fully aware of my surroundings until I roused in the hospital. The gap in my memory is frightening. I've tried to piece it together with Kido-san over the phone, but I can't be certain about anything.

I've developed pneumonia, and the doctors are blaming it on my late hours and insufficient nutrition and hydration. It's not as if I've been neglecting to eat and drink on purpose. My appetite was reduced, so I didn't eat as much, but apparently that was a sign of illness.

I've spent the last few days in a constant state of mortification and guilt. My parents must have been horrified when they heard that I was in the hospital, and medical care is expensive, even with insurance.

And I can't describe how embarrassed I was when Anami-san appeared in the hospital room. Kido-san told me that she was distraught when I collapsed, but I suspected as much. I have disjointed impressions, mostly auditory, of her calling my name and insisting on staying with the nurse. I was hardly able to look at her when she visited, and my mother scolded me over it.

I don't understand her. I've never been hardy, and this isn't the first time that I've taken ill at school. No one else has visited me when I'm ill, and she's so persistent.

On Friday, she dropped off notes and homework assignments, but declined my mother's offer to come in. Yesterday, mother insisted, and she was ushered into my bedroom. I had the impression that we were both uncomfortable.

I didn't know what to say, so I thanked her for copying her notes for me. I pointed out that her notes from Thursday afternoon were written in English and requested a translation, which was a misstep- she was embarrassed and needlessly apologetic. Overall, the atmosphere was awkward, and she didn't stay long. It's for the best- technically, I'll be contagious for another day.

I thought I had reestablished distance from Anami-san and Kido-san. We stopped eating together early this week. I'm sure Kido-san was irritated by it, since he's been stiff and brusque around me. And, despite my best intentions, Anami-san hasn't been as animated as usual. Why does she continue to visit, despite my stepping away from her? Why does Kido-san call? I don't know what to say to either of them. I feel so uncomfortable and humbled- I put effort into stepping back from them, but then Anami-san is sitting beside me and peeling an apple, even though I'm silent and staring at the far wall.

I had to show appreciation somehow, so when she left yesterday, I thanked her and called her Eimi-san, something she asked me to do while she was giving me singing lessons. I wonder if she understood my intentions. I'm aware that communication isn't among my talents.

My parents didn't mention her at first, but I suspected that they would. My mother asked about her today, and, as usual, I didn't know how to respond. Calling her a friend seems presumptuous after how I've treated her, but I think my parents made other (more dangerous) assumptions.

I'm sure her intentions were good, but I wish she hadn't seen me in the hospital. I must seem more delicate and helpless than ever. My parents tell me that I should be proud of myself, and of my mental capabilities. Generally, I wouldn't choose to trade them for social skills and physical strength and size. But sometimes, the desire to change everything about myself is overwhelming. Sometimes, I want to be talkative, strong, and well-liked, like Yagami-san, even if it means trading in my intelligence.

Of course, traits and skills cannot be traded and changed, so those thoughts are useless. But I can't seem to stop entertaining them.

I wonder if Eimi-san and Kido-san think less of me because of all of this...

**Cultural Notes:**

**-Windows into the classroom:** Japanese classrooms generally have two walls of windows: one facing the outside, and one facing the hallway. Anyone walking down the hall can look into each classroom on either side through the windows, hence Sora's ability to watch the band practice from the hallway.

**-When dad drinks with his coworkers: **There's this business culture in Japan where coworkers drink together after work. This is seen as a work event meant to increase bonds between members, and there is etiquette involved. The practice is called _nomikai_. Expectations vary from company to company, but for some companies, it's expected for coworkers to drink together frequently, causing workers to come home late and drunk often. Other companies don't emphasize this practice as much, and still others are fine with employees attending, but not drinking alcohol.

**-Peeling an apple: **Japan is big on etiquette, and hospital visits are no exception. It's bad form to visit someone without a gift. An apple is a popular choice, since it's healthy and unlikely to be forbidden by the doctor. It's expected for the person visiting to peel the apple for the patient. Japanese people often peel their fruits out of fear of pesticides, which is a little ironic from my Western perspective, considering that the skin of fruits often contain fiber and nutrients.

Since Eimi is American, it's odd for her to know about the Japanese apple hospital visit ritual. This implies that she's visited a Japanese person in the hospital in the past, or that she's been specifically coached for hospital visits in Japan.

**Author's Notes:**

I was late on this one because I was on a weekend getaway, and the hotel charged for wifi- geez! XD I'd better hurry to write this week's installment, too…!

Koushiro's causing a ruckus, huh?


	8. June 4

**Voices**

June 4: 22nd- 28th

**15.06.22**

**Monday**

**Kido Jyou**

Well, my first high school midterms are over. I did well, but I'm a little surprised and frustrated. I'm usually the top student across all of the subjects, except for health/gym. I, uh, got knocked down a few pegs this time.

Okay, Eimi-chan's fluent in English, so I wasn't surprised to see her at the top there. But how did she take contemporary society, too? Out of curiosity, I checked the music class, and she also got the best score there (I take calligraphy, but I'm not especially good at it). Koushiro-kun was at the top for mathematics and science. In the end, I only placed first in Japanese.

Eimi-chan must have studied her kanji like a madwoman. How did she have time to study everything else so hard? Still, she really nosedived in math, placing just above the middle of the pack. Except for that, gym, and our electives, the three of us took the top three spots in each subject.

At first I thought American education must be better than people tell us, but I think it's just Eimi-chan. Poor Mimi-chan hardly passed some of the classes, especially math and science. According to her, her schooling in New York City wasn't anywhere near the standard of these tests. I recommended my cram school, but I don't think she's interested.

I'm surprised Koushiro-kun performed so well. He returned to school on the first day of midterms, so he probably wasn't at 100%, but he still did so well...

My friends are monsters, aren't they?

It's funny, though. My scores are higher than they were in middle school, but I'm placing lower... I wonder if it's because I studied with them so much? I checked the scores for other classes in my grade, and we're at the top of our year.

I can't decide if it's exciting or discouraging to have classmates like Koushiro-kun and Eimi-chan. Either way, I'm not going to let them leave me in the dust. I'll give our finals for this term everything I've got!

**15/06/23**

**Tuesday**

**Ishida Yamato**

Man, high school tests don't mess around. I placed within the top ten in every subject, so it's fine, but I used to place within the top five during middle school.

Can't say I'm interested in trying to claw my way up there, now. Kind of a waste of time when you've got classmates getting perfect scores.

Band practices are _finally_ back on- club meetings are canceled while we take tests. We've decided to enter one of the contests Eimi found, so everyone's focused. Realistically, our odds probably aren't good, since we'll be facing established bands. But we all want to perform, and I think we'll put up a good fight.

Takeru's staying with Dad and me this weekend, which really means that he's staying with me. I'll have to find time to clean the apartment and go grocery shopping somehow. It feels like ages since I've seen him.

It's been so weird with him recently. It's like he's taller every time he visits, and like his personality is a little different. I can't keep up, and it... I don't like it. Am I a bad brother? I mean, we both have school, our clubs, and our assignments. It's not fair how little time is left over after that.

My brother is growing up, and I'm not around to see it happening. All I'm getting are snapshots. What if I don't even have those someday?

I guess my parents did what they had to do, but I can't believe people marry without meaning forever.

**15/06/24**

**Wednesday**

**Tachikawa Mimi**

Dear Diary,

Oh my goooooooood. I hate exams! I thought I was going to cry when they passed them out. They're a bajillion times harder than the tests in the states, and I have more homework, and when are kids supposed to have fun? This is so stupid! You're supposed to enjoy your youth!

Somehow I managed not to fail anything, so my parents aren't mad, but I wonder if they're disappointed? At first, I liked being back in Japan, but now I wish we were in New York again. I can't even let off some steam at a party, because no one parties here, because everyone is at their school club and then trying to finish their homework before they fall asleep at their desk.

This isn't any way to live!

Ugh, I wonder if I'm just stupid. Eimi-chan came straight from America, sat down, and placed first in a few subjects. Jyou-kun did really well, too. He already goes to cram school, even though it's only his first year. Why does he care so much about grades? Wouldn't he rather go see a movie or shop or hang out?

Sora-chan did well, too... Maybe I should study more with my friends for finals, but it's such a drag...

I don't have time for this journal assignment! I'm gonna go watch TV and surf the internet, and no one can stop me, so there!

XOXOXO,

Mimi

**15.06.25**

**Thursday**

**Izumi Koushiro**

Thankfully, I did well on my exams, despite taking them so soon after my illness. My condition has improved, but I haven't fully recovered. My parents insist that I go to bed once my homework is completed until I'm well again. I'm not a fan of this, but I can't argue after frightening them.

I admit that I felt awkward when I stepped into the classroom on Monday. They all saw me faint and leave in an ambulance, and their attention on my return was embarrassing. I'm afraid it made me even less social than usual.

I wasn't sure if I'd be welcomed back into my lunch group after my behavior towards them, but Eimi-san sat down beside me during lunch on Monday and demanded to know why I was in school at all. I take it the attitudes towards student illness vary between the states and Japan. She expected me to stay at home longer, but we don't have retests here, or at least, not for a case like mine. I was obligated to return, and I was fortunate that I didn't take ill during testing week.

I've been making a point of speaking to Eimi-san more, and of being less formal with everyone. It's been uncomfortable, but I feel they're owed the effort after being so accommodating towards me.

It's not wise to push myself, so I'll stop writing here and go to bed.

**June 26, 2015**

**Friday**

**Anami Eimi**

Holy stars. You would not _believe_ the tests they give over here. I almost had a nervous breakdown when I saw my math exam. If not for studying with Jyou-kun so much, I would have bombed for sure. Actually, I think I owe a lot to his help. I wish I had a way to thank him… I can't even treat him to dinner or something, since I'm broke. I wonder if there's something I can do for him?

Well, I got through it, so it was a success, somehow. I don't really want to think about it now, you know?

Would you believe Koushiro-kun came back to school for his exams?! He should be taking care of himself! But he said that he had no choice. Apparently, everyone has to take the tests at the same time across each grade level, and there aren't make up tests. Can you imagine? That would never fly in the states.

He seems like he's doing well. Actually, he's been talking to me a lot lately, and I'm having a lot of fun. I found out that he has a very dry sense of humor. He's actually kind of sassy when he's not being so polite and formal. Who knew?

In other news, the pool opened, and just as I suspected, everyone is so tiny and cute, and then I'm all huge and tall and… Sigh. I feel so self-conscious. I wish I were pretty and personable, like Mimi-chan… How did I get so big? Do I eat too much? Is it just that I'm American? I'm really not that tall or big by American standards. I mean, my BMI is healthy.

As expected, Taichi-kun is a really good swimmer, but Yamato's good, too. Jyou-kun and Koushiro-kun are really bad! It's hilarious! Like, don't you guys live on an island in the middle of an island?

I actually love swimming, it's the only athletic thing I'm not bad at, although Yamato definitely swims faster than me. It's really too bad that you need… You know, a swimsuit.

Oh! The boys are practicing for a show, isn't that exciting? I'm trying to help, but all I can really do is work on lyrics and try to listen for problems. I think they're starting to sound really good, though! Fingers crossed for the performance!

Yours,

Eimi

**15/06/27**

**Saturday**

**Yagami Taichi**

Exams happened, it sucked, let's move on.

Actually, can you _believe_ my classmates?! Koushiro literally got perfect scores in math and science! Eimi did the same in English and music, and trailed a few points behind Koushiro in science, and don't even get me _started_ on Jyou. I mean, holy crap. They're beasts! Who the hell studies that much? What's the point? Is it really worth it to see your name at the top of the board? Is there some other reason?

My parents sure think there is… Damn. I wonder how I'm so stupid and Hikari's so smart. She usually takes the fifth to tenth spot in her class. I'm… We'll just say… _lower_.

Ahhh, well. I didn't fail anything. S'all that really matters, yeah?

Heh, so like… They opened the pool. God bless summer, man. You would not_ believe_ Sora's legs in a swimsuit. I thought her calves were nice, but her thighs?! Not a good time to be wearing nothing but trunks, let's leave it at that. And I guess I never noticed, since she's always running at the mouth, and that's not my type, but… Mimi? _Yikes_. She's all slim and confident, like a model. Hell, a _supermodel_. Wait, what's the difference, anyway? Whatever.

Oh and hey, Eimi? _Man_, they build 'em different in America, don't they. I like athletic girls, so she's not for me, but you can't argue with those curves. And her hair's really long, it's kind of nice how it floats on the water around her.

Actually, we've got a lot of cute girls in my class! I got in with the right group of kids, didn't I?

Practices are back on, and we're really ramping up for a tournament. I'm going to train as hard as I can. I've gotta get out there and run to work on my stamina. Later!

**15/06/28**

**Sunday**

**Takenouchi Sora**

I'm so glad our midterms are finished. Thankfully, I managed to do well. I hovered around fifth to tenth place for most of my subjects. I noticed that Yamato and I scored similarly on everything, except that he did better in math, and I did better in contemporary society.

The tennis club is preparing for tournaments, but I doubt I'll play this year. We have so many talented players that the first years don't have much hope of making the rotation. Either way, we're all working hard and trying to support one another.

I gave my mother an ikebana arrangement for the convention, and… Well, she was disappointed. In the end, she chose not to exhibit it. I went to the event and helped her with the booth, which was fine. Afterward, she asked me why I've fallen behind on practicing ikebana.

I was tempted to apologize and start working harder, but I remembered Taichi-kun's advice, and decided to tell her the truth. I told her that, while I like ikebana and respect the art, I'm much more interested in designing clothing. She was quiet for a while, then asked me to show her my work.

My heart started beating so hard. Designing clothing seems like such a fragile, difficult goal, and I'm always so hesitant to share it with people. But I showed her a few of the things I'm most proud of, plus some of my newest drawings, and she looked at them for a long time. Finally, she asked me if I'd be interested in designing fabrics with flower motifs for kimonos, as well as place mats to put beneath her arrangements.

And in that moment, I knew that my mother didn't want to control my future after all. She wants to work with me and make the family business better together, using each of our strengths. I'm embarrassed to admit it, but I started to tear up.

My mom is a distant woman. She's very skilled and very proper, and sometimes, she's hard to approach and get to know. But the truth is that she feels things deeply and cares about me a lot, even if she doesn't always know how to show it. In the future, I'll have to work harder to communicate with her, so we can avoid misunderstandings.

I don't know what else to say. I feel so relieved and grateful. It's like I dropped a burden and feel so much lighter now.

I can't wait to see what my mom and I can do together.

**Cultural Notes:**

**-Posting test results:** Yep, exam scores are often posted for everyone to see in Japan. The top performers are at the top of the list. Talk about pressure!

**-Schooling in Japan vs America:** Japan takes schooling much more seriously than the states, and their approach tends to be more uniform across the nation. On average, Japanese students attend 60 more days of school per year than their American counterparts. Japanese curriculum is advanced compared to what you find in the states. There is no skipping years or separating children on the basis of ability. It's assumed that everyone can perform at the top standard, and that the bottom performers simply study the least.

So, the kids are held to higher standards, but there are also problems of depression, bullying, and psychological problems like _hikikomori_ from all of the pressure. (_Hikikomori _is a condition most often found in Japan where people, most typically male youths, refuse to leave their homes, or even their bedrooms).

**-No make up exams:** Japan tends to be strict about their make-up exam policies. Often, staying healthy is considered part of taking exams, no excuses, especially for entrance exams. There might be exceptions for mid terms and finals, but I assume that the situation has to be extreme.

**Author's Notes:**

Just to let you guys know, the kids will be on summer break from mid July through August, and I'll be taking a break with them. See you next week!


	9. July 1

**Voices**

July 1: 6th-12th

**15/07/06**

**Monday**

**Yagami Taichi**

Yesssss! Just one more week, and then it's summer break! Seven weeks with no classes! It's the best time of the year. The only thing I'll have to do is play soccer, which is basically what I wish I could always do.

I am so ready for this tournament! BRING IT ON! Haha, I'm getting pumped. Maybe I'll hit the gym and do some endurance training after this.

There's really only one downside to school being out, and that's not being able to see Sora. And, you know, swim with all the girls. I wonder if I could put together some kind of day trip to the beach? I suck at organizing stuff, though. Maybe Jyou would be good at it? He's into Mimi, right? And she's friends with Sora. It could work!

And maybe Sora'd be willing to meet up with me to play soccer? I mean, we all live on Odaiba. It's not that big. Hopefully I can convince people to do stuff over the break.

Mimi likes to do stuff, so she's probably in, and she can convince Jyou to go. I'm hoping Sora will go places if I ask. How do I hook Eimi and Koushiro in? I don't know how much they like me, but they're friends with Sora, Mimi, and Jyou, I like them okay, and they'll fill the group out more.

Hm, I'd better talk to Mimi. Maybe she could make a plan.

Just as long as Yamato's not a part of it...

**15/07/07**

**Tuesday**

**Tachikawa Mimi**

Dear Diary,

Yessss! This is the last week of this term! I can't believe I made it! I can't wait to relax and go out with my girls!

Speaking of, you know, I think Taichi-kun might have a thing for one of them. It has to be Sora-chan, right? I mean, no offense to Eimi-chan, but I think she's too low key for Taichi-kun. And besides, who could resist Sora-chan?

Anyway, he mentioned that it would be fun to do stuff this summer as a group with our friends. I think he's got a few things in mind, day trips to the beach and the pool, maybe the mall and some of the stuff on the mainland, like a theme park or a zoo. That sounds so fun! I like doing things with just my girls, but a big group is always exciting, especially when there's chemistry kicking around. Hehehehe! And if we go swimming, I can wear a cute bikini instead of a school swimsuit.

I'm sure I can convince Sora-chan to do things, and Jyou-kun will probably go along with me. Eimi-chan is harder. I wouldn't bother with Koushiro-kun- he'll just try to get out of it, and probably trail after us if he does go. But Taichi-kun specifically mentioned him, so...

Well, I guess this will be a nice challenge for me, huh? I wonder if flirting would work? He'd better not get any funny ideas, though!

But Taichi-kun didn't mention Yamato-kun at all. Isn't Yamato-kun friends with Sora-chan and Eimi-chan? Haha, he's one of those guys that girls love and boys hate. Taichi-kun and Yamato-kun don't really get along, do they?

I think I just thought of a way to make this summer more interesting...!

XOXOXO,

Mimi

**15.07.08**

**Wednesday**

**Kido Jyou**

Help.

Crap. _Crap!_ I don't know what to do. There's talk going around about my friends going to the beach over summer break. It started with Taichi-kun saying how fun it would be and pestering me to do his work for him- you know, deciding where to go and how to get there, contacting everyone, all of that. At first I told him to figure it out himself and keep me out of it, but then he mentioned that Mimi-chan was going.

I honestly couldn't decide whether to be happy or annoyed. I hate how everyone knows I'm attracted to Mimi-chan. Why can't I be detached and hard to read, like Koushiro-kun? It's so embarrassing, and it's not like she could ever be interested in me.

But at the same time, I can't believe I'm being invited to a beach trip with girls, especially a girl like Mimi-chan. Actually, except for school trips, I don't think I've gone on a trip with friends. I've always hung out with serious kids, you know?

I'm a little torn, because I do want to go, but... Well, I had planned to be really serious this summer and get ahead on my schoolwork. But... one day can't hurt, can it?

I wonder if Taichi-kun ever stopped to think about who will chaperon this trip of his. I guess that's on me, huh?

Of course...

**15/07/09**

**Thursday**

**Takenouchi Sora**

Mimi-chan is very excited about going on a beach trip with Taichi-kun. It sounds like a lot of fun, but I'm not sure that they've thought much about the details.

I want to go, but we need more of a plan before I approach my mom about it. She'll let me go if everything is accounted for, but right now, we can't even seem to decide on the guest list. Mimi-chan invited Eimi-chan, but she said she has a summer job, and that she's busy with her club activities. Koushiro-kun just wasn't interested.

I want to invite Yamato, but I know Taichi-kun doesn't like him, and apparently his band is practicing a lot over the break... I keep hoping Mimi-chan will invite him, or that Eimi-chan will mention it to him.

I should probably just talk to them, but I don't want to be teased about asking a specific boy to come. But it's more fun with more people, right?

I'm looking forward to summer, but I will miss seeing everyone everyday. And, to be honest, my apartment can feel a little oppressive, since my mother is so quiet and serious. I'll have to do my best to get out and enjoy myself.

Well, with Mimi-chan around, I think I can manage.

**July 10, 2015**

**Friday**

**Anami Eimi**

Dear Kitty,

I'm so happy! I have my first job ever, all because of Yamato!

I'm seriously broke, and I guess Yamato noticed, because I'm always turning down going to cafes after practice with the boys. Apparently, his dad works for the Fuji Television, which has this super cool building that looks like a giant ball propped on a grid. Ishida-san needs an interpreter over the summer to translate some articles into English for the station's website.

I'm not sure if Japanese students are allowed to work during the school year? I think it might depend on the school, or on getting certain forms filled out. But summer break is fine, so I'll finally have some money!

Also, I don't always have to go to the station, so I can still sit in on most of our band practices. Yamato was very insistent about that, for some reason. He's very dedicated to The Teenage Wolves.

Oh, also, Mimi-chan is talking nonstop about a beach trip, and Taichi-kun has started straight-up nagging me about it. I think I'm touched, but also annoyed.

I want to go, but I'm a little nervous... I don't have a swimsuit that fits besides my school one, and I'm not really sure if I want to lie on the beach next to Sora-chan and Mimi-chan... They're so cute... I wasn't sure about fitting it into my schedule either, so I asked Yamato. But it turns out no one invited him- how could you not invite Yama? He's a nice guy, and totally welcome at a beach for, uh, aesthetic reasons.

So then I got all nervous and awkward, and I asked Mimi-chan if Yamato could come, and she said, "Sure, the more the merrier!"

But she grinned like a Chesire cat, and I am concerned.

But! It turns out Yamato is really a guy who can make things happen! His Dad has a van (this is weird to me, coming from the states, but most people in Tokyo don't have cars! They all use public transportation), and he volunteered to drive us and chaperon, which made Jyou-kun happy.

So, it looks like this beach thing is happening! Oh, oh, I wonder if we'll do stuff like... Smash a watermelon with a bat, watch fireworks, and have a courage contest? Oooooh, and a festival with yukata! Not that I own a yukata…

Oh, did anyone ask Koushiro-kun? He might not want to go, but it might hurt his feelings if we're all talking about it and no one invited him. I'll ask Mimi-chan.

Yours,

Eimi

**15/07/11**

**Saturday**

**Ishida Yamato**

Today was the last day of this term, finally! We have the whole summer to practice, and three weeks until our first contest. We'll spend part of most days at school, preparing in our clubroom.

I got Eimi a job at my dad's work. I knew just sitting in on practices all summer would be a drag, but honestly, I want her on hand to listen for problems, and to stay on top of administrative things. So now she can sit there and make some money, and I can ask her to do things here and there. Everyone wins, yeah?

Ah, speaking of, she mentioned a beach trip with her friends. I'm not too close with her group, except for Sora, but the beach is a nice change of scenery. Besides, it's hard to turn down an opportunity to annoy Taichi-kun, who apparently had no intention of inviting me.

So, you know. My dad is always looking for a way to relax and spend some time with me, since he's always so busy, so I mentioned it to him. He said he'd drive us, so all Taichi-kun could do was fake a smile and run with it.

I wonder if I'm pushing it too much, since we really don't get along. But I'll just avoid him in the name of keeping the peace.

Because really, who wouldn't want to go to the beach with Sora?

**15.07.12**

**Sunday**

**Izumi Koushiro**

It's been a prodigious day. I woke up early, completed a program for a local business, sent the payment invoice, studied a math text, and worked on a personal programming project. I can spend my time however I'd like to during summer vacation, and it's such a relief.

I wish every day could be like this, pursuing my own interests and accomplishing goals. School often prevents this, since I'm made to study subjects that aren't of interest to me, such as music and physical education. But I suppose there is merit to growing more well-rounded before I focus solely on math and programming in college.

Unfortunately, my mother asked me if I'm planning to do anything with my friends over the break. I suppose she's referring to Eimi-san and Jyou-san. Eimi-san invited me to a few outings, with particular emphasis on a beach trip. I'm not interested, and I thought I would be able to avoid it.

However, Eimi-san stopped by yesterday to drop off one of my handkerchiefs. She still frequently forgets to bring her own, and to return them to me at the end of the school day. Naturally, my mother invited her in and chatted with her while she made us a snack. She asked about Eimi-san's plans for the summer, and she mentioned the beach trip.

It would appear that I'm attending now. I suppose I could have refused, but mom looked so happy when Eimi-san specified that I was invited. I can't help but wonder if Eimi-san orchestrated all of this. Does she sense that I want to please my parents? I can't decide if I'm upset with her or not. No one enjoys being cornered, but... She means well. I've been engaging her in conversation more, and I've found that she's kind and earnest.

She looked almost as happy as my mother when I agreed to attend.

Well… I suppose it's just one day.

**Cultural Notes:**

**-Summer break: **The Japanese summer break starts in mid July and usually ends in late August/early September. Actually, it would probably start at the end of next week, honestly. Also I'd like to clarify that I messed up the exam schedule. They should have had midterms earlier, and then finals right before the end of the term. My bad!

**-Working during the school year:** I'm unclear on the rules for this. They might vary from school to school, especially between private and public schools.

**-Club meetings over break:** It's common for clubs to meet during school breaks, hence Taichi practicing soccer and The Teenage Wolves practicing. The facilities at school are usually still available for this reason. It's also common for club members to meet for social outings.

**-Fuji Television building:** During 01, Wargreymon ripped out the sphere Eimi mentions and threw it at Venommyotismon.

**-Watermelons, fireworks, courage contest, festival: **Eimi is basically rattling off the "Japanese student summer break activities, according to anime" checklist. Obviously, Eimi has seen some anime/read some manga.

**-Yukata:** Sort of a lightweight, casual kimono worn in summer.

**Important Announcement!**

I _will not_ update Voices during the summer break, since they don't have to do this assignment during breaks. I'll see you guys again during the first week of September, and we'll see how the break went for everyone. I'll be working on Growing Up with You and Seeking Resonance during that window, so please check them out!

In the meantime, if you have any ideas about events you'd like to see in Voices, please let me know! Thank you to everyone who has already written in :) Oh, and please don't send me coupling suggestions, I've got all of that planned out already :) I'm looking for events, such as "Taichi and Yamato get into a big fight over x." Also, I am definitely going to cover the cultural festival and the sports festival :D

Thanks so much for reading! I'll see you all again soon!


	10. September 1, Pt 1

**Note: **The summer break chapter was too long, so I'm splitting it into two parts. Stay tuned for part two next week.

**Voices**

September 1, Pt 1: 31st-2nd

**15/08/31**

**Monday**

**Ishida Yamato**

Well, summer vacation is over, and we're officially back in school. The Teenage Wolves practiced almost every day over the break, and we've made a lot of progress. I helped dad at work to make some money, and I saw Takeru a few times. Kid's growing too damned fast. I noticed a couple of girls his age checking him out while we were together. Wasn't he eight years old just the other day?

We finally entered our first competition. No one would admit it, but I think we were all nervous as hell. Hiro stopped swaggering, Akihiko's eyes glazed over more than ever, and Naoki kept talking nonstop and drumming his fingers on everything. Not sure about Eimi; she was running around the whole time.

Waiting for your turn to play is the worst. You can hear the other bands over a scratchy green room sound system, and the other contestants in there with you pretend not to see anyone or to hear how great the performing band is. Honestly, outside of the venue, inside the green room, and onstage all feel like different, distinct universes.

This was my first public performance. I admit that I felt shaky when Eimi ushered us onstage. Just before we stepped on, she stopped us and said, "Sora-chan and Mimi-chan came to cheer us on, so give them a good show!"

Somehow, that only made me more nervous. When did Eimi tell the girls about the contest? Should I have told them? Maybe I'll post a flier at school next time.

I focused on adjusting my bass strap and the microphone stand, squinting in the stage lights. It was like an oven up there, except humid, too. When I couldn't avoid it anymore, I looked out at the audience, and my vision swam. There were so many people, growing less and less distinct further from the stage.

For a second, I almost panicked. Then I heard Sora and Mimi-chan cheering, starting a round of applause as we were announced, and I had to smile. I don't know what I did or how I did it, but I felt myself relaxing and smirking, even though I was nervous.

Then Naoki counted us in. At first, I think you focus so much on what you have to do that you block out the crowd. But eventually, I relaxed enough to feel their energy and respond to it, and that's when everything clicked.

We won honorable mention, which was kind of disappointing. I know we're new, but we practiced so much, and performing felt so great, I just assumed we would place. I guess it's a reminder to keep working. Plus, now that I've seen the performance recording, I have to admit that we have some weak spots to work on. We'll be ready for the next event.

I thought the contest would be hard to top, but our group gatherings went really well. I didn't expect to enjoy them as much as I did.

The beach trip was first, and the girls looked great. Sora wore an athletic bikini in blue, very practical for a day of running around on the beach. She's fit and toned, and I'll be asking Eimi and Mimi-chan about the pictures they took.

We spent most of the day swimming and playing beach volleyball. I feel a little embarrassed about how competitive I was with Taichi-kun. I guess I wanted to butt heads with him in an acceptable way and win. Well, trash him, really. But ultimately, we were always on opposite teams, so whoever had Sora won.

At one point, I walked away from the group to check on dad. A group of older girls, probably in their early twenties, stopped me and asked me to... Well, they wanted to pick me up. I couldn't believe it. I tried to stay calm, but I could feel my face heating up. I'm a minor! Did they think I would just follow them if they complimented me, bent forward, and winked?

I was struggling to respond, which I think the ladies took as acceptance. One of them giggled and took my hand, and when I tried to turn away, I found Sora jogging towards me.

I hate to admit it, but my heart leapt to my throat, and I almost panicked. I stumbled over her name, like she had caught me doing something wrong. I worried about what she would think of me if she misunderstood the situation.

I tore my arm away from that woman. "I'm not interested," I said, and I was already walking away before I finished talking. They called after me, but I ignored them. Ugh. I can't believe kids have to worry about stuff like that. I know I look a little older than my age, but not _that _much.

Sora walked back beside me, staring at the ground and not saying a word. I don't know what she was thinking, but she wasn't happy. "Thanks for the save," I said.

Her head jerked up. "Oh- You aren't mad, then?"

"What? No!" I realized that I was still unsettled, so I tried to recover some ground by playing it smooth. "They weren't my type."

"Oh?" She looked away again, and I wondered if I had said something wrong. Or could it be that she was jealous? I felt myself smirking, even though I knew it wasn't the wisest reaction.

After a pause, she said, "What _is_ your type?"

I hesitated. Sora is... she's different. I've never been interested in a girl before, not past surface attraction, anyway. But Sora doesn't squeal about superficial things and get tongue-tied when she talks to me. She's compassionate, mature, serious, smart, wise, and beautiful.

So yeah, I guess _that's_ my type.

Instead of saying all of that, I went with leaded misdirection. "I like your hair. The clip is very pretty." She was wearing a hibiscus flower in her hair, a real one. It was placed very skillfully, pulling the hair away from her face on one side. Her hand brushed the petals, then fell away.

"Thanks," she said. "My mother stopped me on my way out and clipped it in."

I've gathered by now that Sora has a complicated relationship with her mother. I guess I wanted to spend some time with her, so I sat down on one of our blankets and patted the spot beside me. I mostly listened as she talked about her family's ikebana school and her mother. I feel bad for her. It seems like she really struggles to make both her mother and herself happy. I know what it's like to have a tense home environment.

It was a little bumpy, but the beach trip was great.

We also went to a festival as a group, and I was really impressed when Eimi told me that Sora made her yukata. She didn't have one, being American, and apparently Sora offered to make one. And it was beautiful, well-made, and perfectly tailored. I ended up having a long conversation with Sora about her process. She's really very talented.

While we were talking, Sora suddenly paused and said, "Where is everyone?" The crowd was unbelievable, and I guess we lost track of the others while we were talking. We had wandered into the game area, and we spent some time looking at the prizes. I noticed Sora lingering in front of the shooting gallery, which had a collection of traditional teddy bears made of yukata-styled fabric. She was staring at a red one with a white and pink floral pattern.

This was a little forward of me, but I guess I couldn't help it. I leaned close to her and said, "Do you want that?"

Maybe I'm projecting- it was dark, even with the lanterns- but I think she blushed. "Oh- I'm not very good at shooting games."

I shrugged. "I'll give it a shot."

She started stammering, but I was already paying the attendant. Luckily, I always used to win toys for Takeru, so I was pretty confident. Each prize has a target below it, and you just have to hit it with a cork gun. Easy. I refused to let myself feel nervous. I just picked the gun up, took aim, and _bam_. First try.

Thanks, Takeru. I owe you one, kid.

She seemed kind of overwhelmed when I handed her the bear. For a second, I was afraid she'd refuse it, but she smiled and accepted. And I guess that was the first time I gave a gift to someone I'm not related to.

When did I start feeling this way about Sora? I wouldn't say I'm head over heels, but she's definitely on my radar. Maybe there isn't a single moment when you realize you're interested in someone. Maybe it just builds in little steps. But while I'm still able to be at least mostly objective, I have to admit that I could do a hell of a lot worse. I don't feel worried about potentially falling for her. I feel like I'm walking into it knowingly and with the expectation that good things will follow.

Speaking of, we closed the summer with a courage contest. I thought it would be a waste of time, since I'm not scared of whatever booby traps the others cobble together, but I went anyway. I think Mimi-chan is trying to set people up, because she insisted on boy/girl pairs. I couldn't relax until I drew Sora's number; I didn't want to take care of Mimi-chan, and I'm not sure if Eimi would be afraid or not.

I almost got sucked into competing with Taichi-kun again like an idiot, but Sora kept me focused. When he took off running in the dark, Sora and I read our clues and set a course. We triggered a few traps, but Sora just laughed at them, and I guess if she laughs, I feel like laughing, too. We probably should have won, but Taichi-kun managed to find the charm out of pure luck, running around in the pitch black like a fool. Funny how some people are like that; no matter what they do, it works out for them.

I can't say I mind. Sora didn't seem scared, but she walked very close to me. I guess it's nice to be a source of comfort for someone, even mildly so. I haven't felt useful to someone for a long time.

But the summer's over now, and I guess it's time to focus again. Eimi turned in our request form for a performance slot on the main stage during the cultural festival, and we'll have to compete for it. I'm trying to get everyone to concentrate on that. I want as many fans within the student body as possible, so they'll hopefully attend our contests in the future and cheer us on.

**15.09.01**

**Tuesday**

**Kido Jyou**

Augh, I can't believe our break is over! It's so much easier to cover your material when you're not learning new things every day. But I did study a lot, and I finished my homework much faster than usual, since I had Koushiro-kun and Eimi-chan to help twice a week.

I managed to do a few things outside of studying this summer, and I have to admit, it made for a nice change. That beach trip… Can we do that again? Now? No? Well, I guess it's for the best to limit some things. It would be hard to concentrate with girls in bikinis around all the time. I thought my heart would crack my ribs when Mimi-chan lifted her cover up on the beach. I mean, I knew she was wearing a swimsuit under that, but for a split second, it looked like… I'm sorry, I'm getting out of line. She was beautiful, of course. She wore a tiny floral bikini and this huge pink cowboy hat. I asked why she wore it to the beach (I think the hat was made of more material than her suit), and she said the wide brim keeps the sun off of her skin. Hmm. I think she'd look good with a tan, but it's true that sun exposure can damage skin. On that note, I tried to stay under an umbrella with Koushiro-kun and watch everyone play volleyball and swim, but Mimi-chan dragged me out, and I guess when she grabbed my arm and pulled, I followed without thinking.

I was terrible at both, but no one seemed to mind.

At one point during the day, the group drifted apart. Taichi-kun and Eimi-chan were making a sand castle, Koushiro-kun was reading, and I'm not sure where Yamato-kun and Sora-chan went. Mimi-chan rolled over on her towel and asked if I'd put sunscreen on her back. I think I went into shock for a second- was this for real? Was this some kind of sitcom setup? I hesitated, and she said, "My skin's starting to burn, I can feel it. I can't find Sora-chan, and Eimi-chan's all sandy. _Please?_"

Koushiro-kun smacked me with his elbow- maybe he thought Mimi-chan would ask him if I said no? I stood and sat next to her, and I don't think my sweating had anything to do with leaving the shade of the umbrella. This probably goes without saying, but I've never touched a girl like that before. Her skin was like silk, soft and smooth, and I could feel her breathing beneath my hands. I tried not to react, but… Well, I decided to lay down on my stomach on the towel beside hers for a while.

She talked to me for a long time, sort of murmuring. She sounded half asleep, but I can see that. There's something lulling about the sun and the sound of the waves. Mostly she talked about our friends. She seems to think that Koushiro-kun and Eimi-chan are pairing off, as well as Sora-chan and Yamato-kun. I don't claim to be able to read those situations, and while I do think that Eimi-chan has a crush on Koushiro-kun, I doubt he reciprocates.

She didn't say anything about me. I shouldn't have gotten my hopes up. What do I have to offer a girl like Mimi-chan? But it's hard not to hope, especially when she asks me to put sunscreen on her.

I'm an idiot, aren't I.

We also went to a festival together, and it was nice to see the girls all dressed up. You start taking a certain pride in them. It's not sexual, I promise. There's just this feeling of… Yes, these beautiful girls are part of our group, they're with us, and we get to watch them smile and laugh. Nothing lights things up like a happy girl. I wonder if I feel that way because I don't have any sisters, and these are my first female friends? Whatever the reason, I enjoy watching them enjoy themselves, and I feel good when they turn to me and want to share something with me. Does that sound strange? Of course I like my male friends, too, although Taichi-kun tries my patience sometimes.

The last thing we did as a group was a courage contest. I had no interest in walking through a dark abandoned factory (you know I'd trip and break a leg), so I offered to set up the contest, which meant hiding the charms, writing the clues, and setting up the traps the others made. I came to the event, but I spent most of it waiting at the start/finish line in the building's lobby. I planned to stay there the whole time, but when I heard Mimi-chan screaming, I couldn't help myself. I knew she was probably just reacting to a falling sheet or something, but like an idiot, I went running anyway.

Her voice was otherwordly, so high-pitched and keening. I was shivering the whole time, even as I ran full-out. The factory had a lot of rooms and long hallways, and she stopped screaming before I found her, but I remembered where the nearest traps were and moved towards them. She was sitting on the floor in a hallway, pulling gelatin and spiderwebs out of her hair. She called my name when she saw me, and she sounded so relieved. She jumped up and hugged me, and her body was cold.

"You should have worn a jacket," I said, which is a ridiculous thing to say to a girl wiping tears from her face and goo from her hair. But even in summer, nights can be cool, and I took my sweater off and offered it to her. Honestly, I was a little surprised when she put it on.

I asked her if she was okay, and she started talking in a stream. It ran into a hiss that built and built into almost a screech, like a kettle coming to boil. I can't say I caught every word, but it seems that she ran into spider webs and broke a trip line that dropped jello on her head. She was furious at Koushiro-kun. I know he doesn't have any people skills, so if Mimi-chan says he wasn't considerate of her feelings, then I believe her. But Mimi-chan admitted herself that she ran off and got lost, so I'm not sure how Koushiro-kun is to blame for her ending up alone. It seems they both made mistakes, but it's hard for me to avoid favoring the crying girl. At least I know I'm biased. I avoided Koushiro-kun for a few days so that I wouldn't say something accusing to him.

Once she calmed down, I led Mimi-chan back to the lobby, and she clung to my arm the whole time. Is it wrong that I enjoyed the courage contest? I couldn't help it. Before we said goodbye and went home, Mimi-chan thanked me with such a sweet, serious look in her eyes. I swear I can still see her face, with moonlight in her eyes and her hair.

She still hasn't returned my sweater. That's alright. She can keep it if she wants.

**September 2, 2015**

**Wednesday**

**Anami Eimi**

Dear Kitty,

I'm really sad that the summer is over. It was the best one of my life. Back in the states, I was stuck at home alone with my brother all summer, marooned in suburbia. I held my breath for three months every year, waiting for life to start up again. Here, I'm within a fifteen minute walk of a group of friends. I was so busy!

Let's see... The Teenage Wolves rehearsed every day except Sunday, just like always, except that our practices were longer. Mostly I sat there and did my translating work, but sometimes I listened or did gopher stuff. I'm still working on my playing with Hiro, and I'm getting better.

The boys entered a contest. It was really exciting, but I was so busy that the memory is a blur. There were forms to fill in, light and sound people to talk to, and instruments to cart around. But it was so worth it when I saw my boys walk onstage! There was a big crowd, and Sora-chan and Mimi-chan were there, and everyone cheered for them so much.

They weren't as polished as some of the other bands, but I think our songs are great, and I loved watching Yama perform. It's like he steps into a new skin when he hits the stage, so smooth and confident. His presence seems effortless, but I know him well enough to guess that it's not. He's working hard up there.

We didn't place, but we won honorable mention. I think it was great for our first contest, but Hiro and Yama seemed a little bummed. Silly boys! Rome wasn't built in a day.

Oh, I've discovered that Mimi-chan's shrieking can hit incredible decibel levels. I watched my boys from the back of the stage, and I could hear her from there. I'm surprised Sora-chan didn't go deaf!

I studied twice a week with Koushiro-kun and Jyou-kun, and sometimes the others joined. Japanese schools give so much summer homework, I couldn't believe it! But we did it together in small chunks in Jyou-kun's apartment, studying in the cool and the quiet with his older brothers drifting by and offering help. They're really nice and smart, like Jyou-kun, but I think he's the family worrywart. They both tease him about it. I was a little jealous of their relationship.

Obviously, I have to mention the much-prophesied beach trip. We chose a day with perfect weather, sizzling and clear. We all met at the school gate and piled into Ishida-san's van early in the morning. Even the car ride was fun, since everyone was talking and excited. (Well, except for Koushiro-kun. He was trying to read while Mimi-chan told him to stop and be social. Why is she so offended by that?)

Speaking of Mimi-chan, she and Sora-chan invited me to shop with them for the trip, and Mimi-chan found this amazing swimsuit for me. It's red and has this flouncy little skirt. But I digress.

When we arrived, everyone carried stuff to the beach- you wouldn't_ believe_ how much stuff you need for the beach- and everyone took off their shirts and cover ups. Ahhhh, Sora-chan and Mimi-chan are sooooo cute, and Taichi-kun was killing it. He's the only one of us with visible muscle definition, and the tan looks so natural on the beach. Don't get me started on Yama, though; he's really too handsome to be allowed. There should be a permit or something. I think I noticed a group of older girls trying to hit on him, but I wasn't in earshot.

I spent the day running around with the others, trying to keep up with volleyball games and swimming. They have so much energy! Ishida-san lounged under an umbrella off to the side all day, trying to give us privacy but stay available. Jyou-kun tried to hide under an umbrella, but Mimi-chan dragged him out, and he's putty with her, I swear. Koushiro-kun was more recalcitrant, and as Mimi-chan isn't strong enough to move him, she enlisted Taichi-kun's help.

Alas, Koushiro-kun. Your day of pleasantly reading on the sand was not meant to be. Taichi-kun picked him up, threw him over his shoulder (_!_), walked into the surf ("Taichi-san, put me down! What are you- _Taichi-san!_"), and as soon as the water was deep enough, he tossed him in.

Koushiro-kun doesn't swim well, so I ran behind behind Taichi-kun, trying to make myself heard over his laughing, Koushiro-kun's babbling, and Mimi-chan's giggles, but naturally, it was no good. Koushiro-kun disappeared beneath the water, but it was shallow enough that he found his feet. Then a wave pushed him into me, and we grabbed onto each other. He didn't sway with it at all; it hit him like a train, and judging by the coughing fit that followed, he swallowed a large percentage of it.

So now Koushiro-kun's hacking and turning red, I'm screeching at Taichi-kun and trying to drag Koushiro-kun out, and Taichi-kun's just shaking his head. He grabbed both of us by a shoulder and said, "You can't swim, Koushiro? Learn computers some other time; I'll teach you."

At this point, I was holding Koushiro-kun up. The water was at our waists (well, I guess it was higher on him? I think he's been growing recently, though), and I think I realized all at once that his arms were around me. He was leaning against me and struggling for air. I stopped scolding Taichi-kun and went silent.

Then something curious happened. Mimi-chan walked to the edge of the water and lifted her voice into this sexy, twinkling call. Taichi-kun twisted around so fast that his neck cracked. "Aww, Taichi-kun," she sang- yes, it sounded like siren song- "Come on! We were playing volleyball! We need you! Eimi-chan's a good swimmer. Let _her_ teach him."

What was she thinking? I have no idea! But Taichi-kun turned back towards us, and I swear his eyebrow jerked up. I was trying to tip Koushiro-kun onto his feet, and we were all tangled up, and when Taichi-kun's stupid eyebrow went flying, I wanted to grab it and pull it back down. I almost started sputtering because I felt so self-conscious and defensive. Koushiro-kun let go of me, but another wave broke, and I heard him sigh as he grabbed my arm.

"I don't know," Taichi-kun said. "Are you strong enough to haul him back in if he slips?"

"He's fine!" Mimi-chan cried. "Come on, Taichi-kun!"

Annnnnd he left. I can't blame him; he had Sora-chan and Mimi-chan beckoning to him in bikinis. That's some Tantalus shit right there. I watched him go until Koushiro-kun heaved on my arm, trying to stand.

"I apologize," he said. "Thank you for your assistance. If it's all the same to you, I'd rather read."

His face was flushed from swallowing sea and coughing, and his hair was all tousled. I guess I suddenly realized just how thin he is. I could see his ribs, faint ridges beneath his skin, and the impression of his hip bones just above his trunks. His body hair is red, too. There's just a tuft on his chest, and a little trail beneath his belly button. Did the other boys have hair like that? I guess I don't remember. But I kept wanting to touch that line of hair, and thaaaat would not have gone over well. Who cares about body hair? It's hair! I guess it's because it's all so red?

Anyway, he seemed so tiny and fragile, and I said, "That might be a good idea. You were sick not long ago. Don't push yourself."

It was obvious that I made a mistake. First, his eyes flared open. Then they narrowed, and he glanced away. I saw a muscle tighten in his jaw. "Actually... I suppose there _is_ merit to swimming lessons. I didn't perform well in gym class, and it's a part of our grade. Would you mind...?"

I admit that I stared at him for a second. Why the sudden switch? But he looked so serious, it didn't occur to me to say no. So I ended up holding his hands for the better part of an hour, trying to teach him to breathe, kick, and stay calm. His biggest problem was that he wasn't relaxing. His breaths were shallow, not enough to fuel the activity or give him buoyancy.

At the time, I was very focused, trying to find the problems and fix them. I don't think I was very aware of holding his hands or being so close to him. But somehow, when my mind wanders these days, I keep finding it there. I can hear the waves and the water splashing beneath his legs. I can feel his hands in mine, and the slow, steady burn in my muscles from supporting him. And I can see his hair, mussed and wet, plastered down above dark, deep-set eyes. He looks very serious when he concentrates. It's a little... Intimidating isn't right. It just makes me feel a little nervous. High strung? But it's not a bad feeling.

Anyway, the others called us and said they were getting shaved ice, so we left the water. I think Koushiro-kun was exhausted; he went straight for his blanket and sat. I guess it must have been hard on him…

We stayed until the sun set, and I was so tired that I fell asleep tucked in the back corner of the van, even with everyone talking. How embarrassing...

I also went to my very first Japanese festival this summer! Sora-chan helped me pick fabric and made a yukata for me, can you believe it?! She's so nice and talented! It's dark blue with yellow and white flowers. She also lent me a spare pair of sandals. The yukata is amazing, but the shoes were very uncomfortable and awkward.

The festival was really fun. The girls looked like moving flowers in their yukatas, there were so many games, and there was food everywhere, all kind of crazy stuff I had never tried before. My friends were all there, and everyone shared bites of things, so I got to try so many new foods. (As a side note, I don't understand why you'd eat octopus. Even deep fried, they are rubber.)

There was this drum ceremony, and it was amazing! There were all of these huge drums set up in the shrine, and young men wearing headbands came out and played them. I could feel the deep reverberations in my bones like a second melody. Yamato was right- it was worth it just for the drums.

The night ended with fireworks. I've seen better- I think the light and air pollution from the city interfered with the viewing. But they were really nice, and it was just such a great evening. The only bad part was the crowd. It was so packed, I kept trying to stay in the middle of my group. Crowds make me nervous...

We closed out the summer by meeting at an abandoned building on the outskirts of the city to tell ghost stories and have a courage contest. It's kind of a gauntlet of scary obstacles in a scary environment that you have to pass to find an object. Whoever finds their object and returns to the starting point first wins. We all made hazards and obstacles, and Jyou-kun set everything up and made hints for us.

Mimi-chan insisted on boy/girl pairs, and I was paired with Taichi-kun. We won, I guess, but it wasn't much fun. He grabbed my hand and ran, and it turned into a blind marathon through dark, musty hallways. I don't even know if we set off any traps; we just kept moving so fast. I like him, but I wish I could have been paired with... well, anyone else, I guess. Poor Koushiro-kun especially needed help. He lost Mimi-chan, or something; they boy give different accounts, so it's confusing.

So, that was my summer, and it was awesome! And my hand is about to fall off, so good night!

Yours,

Eimi

**Author's note:** Thanks for reading! See you next week :)


	11. September 1, Pt 2

**Voices**

September 1, Pt 2: 3rd-6th

**15.09.03**

**Thursday**

**Izumi Koushiro**

Summer always passes so quickly. For the most part, I had a peaceful break. I generally programmed all day, except to work on homework with Eimi-san and Jyou-san. The apartment was quiet and cool, with few distractions or obligations outside of my work. And there is a certain charm to the buzz of cicadas, the tones of the wind chime my mother hung in my window, and summer snacks and iced tea.

My mother was very interested in the beach trip. She insisted on a haircut and new swim trunks. The old ones seemed fine to me, but she said they were too short; apparently, I've been growing, which is certainly welcome. She also packed food for everyone, and I can't help wondering how she finds time for all of this. I wish she could have joined us, since she seemed so excited about it.

It was fine, I suppose. As usual, Mimi-san heckled me about being antisocial when I tried to read. I wasn't interested in playing volleyball or swimming- just what I need, a voluntary day of gym activities- so I spent most of the day beneath an umbrella, reading on a blanket. Home is more comfortable, but the change of scenery was pleasant.

Everyone seemed impressed with my mother's cooking. I tried to remember everything the others said so that I could relate it to her. Mom only cooks for my father and me, since we have no other relatives and I don't invite anyone over. I never would have anticipated that she wanted to take care of _more_ people, but I suppose everyone enjoys sharing their skills. Perhaps I should offer my apartment for a future study session...

After lunch, the others returned to their sports, and I read my book. Eventually, Mimi-san began to complain about my sitting out, and she enlisted Taichi-san's help in convincing me to join in. He proceeded to lift me, carry me across the beach, and dump me into the sea.

It was mortifying. He wouldn't dare treat the other boys like that, but I suppose I'm an exception because I can't fight back. I tried to free myself, but he didn't give an inch. And naturally, I'm not a strong swimmer. I can barely stay afloat in a pool, let alone the ocean.

A wave rolled over me when I went under, and it pulled me forward, then back. I should have remained calm, but it's difficult when water is roaring in your ears and you're disoriented. I hit an obstruction and wrapped my arms around it without thinking, then hauled myself up.

You can imagine my embarrassment when I found myself standing in three feet of water and clinging to Eimi-san's hips. If I hadn't been so busy hacking up salt water, I would have apologized and fled. Sadly, all I could do was cough and lean on her.

She was gracious about it, arguing on my behalf with Taichi-san, who, naturally, was not listening. He suggested giving me swimming lessons, which I was having none of. Mimi-san insisted that Eimi-san teach me, but I wanted to return to terra firma.

And here's where my logic falters. Eimi-san pointed out that I was ill recently, and that resting was advisable. She was correct, and yet the words offended my pride. I didn't care if the others watched me slink back to my umbrella, but... Foolishly, I believe I wanted to prove to Eimi-san that I'm not weak.

And so, despite my embarrassment and the aching in my lungs, I stayed in the water while she instructed me to float, kick, and breathe with my strokes. I spent a lot of time holding her hands and kicking, trying desperately to stay afloat.

But as my body worked, my mind roamed, and I was very aware of Eimi-san. I've never noticed before, but she smiles whenever I look at her. Perhaps she smiles all the time; I don't pay attention. She remained patient and supportive throughout, never complaining about my slow progress and the physical contact. I'm unused to such prolonged social encounters. I was exhausted when we finally stopped, and not just physically.

I'm some ways, it was a very tiring and trying excursion. But I can't seem to regret it, even though my parents asked for a full report of the events. I suppose variety can be worth a certain amount of hassle.

Unfortunately, at the close of the summer, Taichi-san and Mimi-san decided to have a courage contest. Worse yet, I agreed to attend. And worse still, I drew the same number as Mimi-san before we ran Jyou-san's course.

The courage contest took place in an abandoned factory. It was a maze of rooms and hallways, disorienting in the dark. We had flashlights and clues to help us find the charms Jyou-san hid. I wanted to read them before we began, but Taichi-san took off running when Jyou-san gave the starting signal, and I suppose Mimi-san was excited. She ran after them, and I almost lost her immediately.

I found her when she entangled herself in a spider's web and started screeching. Her voice echoed down a dark, featureless hallway, a hellish sound far more frightening than an arachnid. I tried to help her, but she grabbed me and squeezed, covering both of us in filth. I was suddenly less inclined to assist.

I shook her off, but she grabbed my arm. I asked her for some space, and she took offense. I tried to explain that there was nothing frightening there, and that we had to use the clues to finish the contest. Unfortunately, she heard a creak, screamed, ran, and set off a trip line that dropped congealed gelatin on her head. My ears are still ringing with the screaming.

She ran, and I lost track of her in the dark. I checked what felt like hundreds of rooms, calling her name and swinging my flashlight around, but I couldn't find her. I thought the screaming would help, but the echoing was misleading, and I wandered in the wrong direction.

I spent the rest of the contest trying to locate the entrance, then waiting for the others to return. Mimi-san was very upset with me, claiming that I abandoned her and didn't care about her feelings. In my mind, abandonment involves intentionally leaving someone. That's what _Mimi-san_ did when she ran off screaming in the dark.

I only hope the others don't think less of me because of this. Why should I be held responsible for Mimi-san's irrational behavior? If she requires a partner who will hold her and tell her whatever it is she needs to hear during a courage contest, then she should have made that clear from the start instead of insisting on random pairings. I'm sure Sora-san could have soothed her effectively where I failed to.

Fortunately, Mimi-san seems to be the only insulted party now that we've returned to school. I hope she'll forgive me soon. I'm not particularly fond of being glared at.

I can't decide if these events were worth attending. They all had positive and negative sides. I suppose they added variety to my summer activities. I can't help hoping that our winter break will be more calm.

**15/09/04**

**Friday**

**Tachikawa Mimi**

Dear Diary,

Noooo, summer's overrrrr, how did that happen?! Sigh. Goodbye, sun and free time. Hello, classes and homework. I feel like I'm wilting!

I had such a good time this summer, too. I hung out with Sora-chan a lot, reconnected with my friends from before I moved to the states, and played with my new group, too. I cultivated a few succulents and cacti to give my friends, and I learned a few new baking recipes. Somehow I even managed to finish my stupid homework.

But enough about homework! Let's talk about the beach! It was such a beautiful day, so clear and blue! The ocean sounded like music! Is there any place better than a beach in summer? It's like magic, especially when you're young and surrounded by cute boys and girls!

My girls were so cute in their bikinis! Sora-chan was so sporty and hot in hers, and the flower in her hair was a nice counterbalance to the athletic cut of her suit. I wish I could be as toned as her. And then there was Eimi-chan with her marshmallow chest (white and fluffy!) and those knockout hips. I chose dark red to complement her pale skin and dark hair and a little skirt to appeal to her feminine tastes. And you can bet I chose a top to emphasize her shape; a V-neck halter, of course.

The three of us look so different, but we're all hotties on the sand! Isn't that great?

Our boys weren't half bad, either! Yamato-kun is fabulous, obviously. The sun lit up his hair and made it glimmer, and I swear the ocean made his eyes bluer. More blue? Taichi-kun was rocking his athletic build, and even Jyou-kun looked cuter than I expected. His shoulders are way broader than I gave him credit for!

Poor Koushiro-kun looked like someone's little brother who got sent along so he wouldn't feel left out. I almost felt kind of bad for him, since he's so short and scrawny. But then he ignored us as usual, even though we're trying to have fun as a group on the beach, so I stopped feeling bad.

Seriously, how am I ever going to make friends with him if he won't talk? It's not like I _want _to dislike him.

Anyway, I tried to make sure everyone was enjoying the day. I convinced Jyou-kun to play and swim with us, and when Koushiro-kun kept sitting out, I asked Taichi-kun to help. He ended up tossing Koushiro-kun into the water, which I felt kind of bad about. So when Taichi-kun suggesting swimming lessons, I jumped in and said Eimi-chan should give them.

I think Eimi-chan likes Koushiro-kun. She always hovers around him in a group, even though he's so boring. I wonder what she sees in him? At first I thought she was just being nice and making sure he was included, but now I think she likes him. I'm a girl, I know these things! Even if I don't always understand them... I hope Koushiro-kun likes her back. It's really the least he could do, since she's always so nice to him.

But I totally can understand Sora-chan liking Yamato-kun. He's hot, he's amaaaazing onstage (I saw his concert, and he looked so cool performing), and he cares about how people feel. Sometimes his temper is a little random and intense (I can't figure out why he seems to want to blow up at Taichi-kun sometimes), and he's a little too quiet for my tastes, but a girl could do a lot worse.

And I think he likes her back! Annnd they totally disappeared for a while during the beach trip! Go Sora-chan, go! I tried to get the details from her, but she didn't tell me much. It drives me nuts, but sometimes Sora-chan likes to keep things to herself. I wish she'd just spill!

Let's see, we also went to a festival. It was pretty standard, but it was so cute how Jyou-kun kept trying to make sure no one got lost from the crowd and that everyone was happy. It's so sweet how he cares about everyone, especially the girls. He nearly panicked when we lost Sora-chan, but I told him that Yamato-kun was with her, and he calmed down.

Speaking of Sora-chan, she made an amazing yukata for Eimi-chan! I'm so jealous of her talent. I wish I could do something like that! The yukata was nicer than any I've ever had, and when I told Sora-chan that, she said she'd make me one, too! She really is the best friend a girl could have.

Ugh, and now I'm getting ticked off just thinking about the courage contest. I wanted things to be interesting, so I said we should have boy/girl teams. And I'll tell you a little secret: I really wanted to pair Yamato-kun and Sora-chan together! Such a cute couple! I'm telling you, it's going to happen!

I know it was dumb of me, but I think I just assumed Koushiro-kun would draw Eimi-chan's number because they always seem to end up together, which would leave me safely with Taichi-kun, who I thought would play the hero if I got scared. But no! Stupid Koushiro-kun drew _me_! He wasn't supposed to do that! I know it's my fault, anything could happen with the random drawing I set up, but still!

I looked forward to the courage contest all summer, but when I saw that dark factory at night... The hallways were so long, and you couldn't see a thing beyond your flashlight, and Taichi-kun and Eimi-chan told such scary stories before we went in there...

I like to think that I can handle anything, but the truth is that I get scared in those situations. Sometimes being scared is fun, and I thought this time would be like that, but... Well, for example, I ran ahead after Taichi-kun when Jyou-kun started the contest, and when I looked back, Koushiro-kun was already gone!

I called his name and waited, and he answered and eventually strolled along with his face in the clue sheet. Couldn't he tell that I was scared? Why was he more worried about the contest than my feelings?

We worked on a clue and decided which way to go, and I stepped into this huge spider web. And it was _real_, not a fake! Ugh, it was so sticky, and it spread across my face and got in my nose and my mouth and I'm shivering just thinking about it, oh my god! And I swear the spider plopped on my arm and crawled down, it felt fat and cold and huge and I guess I freaked out and started running, and then I set off a trap that dumped jello on my head and it was freezing and slimy and I couldn't help screaming.

Koushiro-kun kept telling me to calm down, because yeah, I can just turn it off like a light switch. I hugged him- I was scared!- and he _pulled me off_, can you _believe_ it?! What, is he afraid of a little jello and spider webs?! He's a boy! He's not supposed to be scared! He's supposed to help me!

But I know he wasn't afraid at all. He sounded normal, and he kept saying, "Calm down, Mimi-san. It's only silk proteins and hydrated gelatin powder. You're not in danger." He pushed me away because he doesn't care if I'm upset. It made me so angry, I think I forgot to be scared... Until I felt something moving in my hair.

I just wanted to go home and get away from Koushiro-kun and the stupid spiders and their stupid gooey webs! I started to cry, and I don't even know if it's because I was mad or scared or frustrated. All I know is that I ran until I got tired, and then I slid down the wall and tried to clean my hair while I thought about how stupid I was and how stupid Koushiro-kun is.

But you won't believe what happened next! Jyou-kun, who I thought was staying out of the courage contest because he was scared, came running to find me when he heard me scream. He could have stayed where he was, but he ran full speed when he thought I was in trouble, even though he was afraid. And when I saw him, I felt so relieved, and I thought, _This is how a guy should act_. I hugged him, and he gave me his sweater because I was cold, even though I was so dirty. He was so worried about me, he kept asking if I was okay and checking my face.

I kind of bombarded him with my story, but he listened and didn't worry about a stupid contest or anything else. He led me back to the factory entrance and let me hold his arm. See! _That's_ a gentleman!

I'm so lucky he was there. Who knows how long it might have taken for the others to find me?

I washed his sweater, but I haven't returned it yet. I don't really know why. It's not like it's something I'd want to wear, but I feel kind of good when I see it draped over my chair.

I'll just keep it for a few more days...

XOXOXO,

Mimi

**15/09/05**

**Saturday**

**Yagami Taichi**

Aww, man. It kinda sucks to be back in school. Just a few days ago, I would have been running around on a field right now. Instead I'm cooped up in here, doing stupid homework.

I pushed really hard during practices this summer. We _all_ did. I thought we'd crush everyone in the tournament, and at first, we did.

It was amazing. We killed it, mowing the other teams down. We even had some shutouts. I can't even tell you what it's like, flying across the field and always knowing a teammate will be where you need them, doing whatever needs doing. When I was younger, I liked always being the best on my team. I thought pushing myself to make up for the slack made me better. But everyone's great on my team, and totally focusing on what I have to do and knowing everyone else is ready to kick ass is _way_ better.

So yeah, things were great, and we blew through the ranks. But the more we won, the more nervous our Captain and the seniors were. I've never seen Cap nervous before. He's always focused, but relaxed. All of us first years could feel the difference. Doesn't he know that everyone looks to the leader and picks up on his attitude?

Long story short, as good as we are, we got steamrolled in the qualifying round to represent our prefecture. And I'm so pissed, not because we lost, but because _we didn't play our best game_!

Turns out our prefecture has this incredible team in it. Jindai high draws athletes from outside of Tokyo- hell, apparently even from outside Japan- with their sports program, and soccer is the star. This is the third time our seniors lost to them in the qualifying round of this tournament, and the same thing keeps happening in other tournaments, too.

Well, of _course_ it does! They let it creep into their heads and mess up their game! We should have given that game our best shot, but we were absolute crap out there. I kept charging in and trying to pass, but no one was there to receive. They were afraid of a stupid team.

Were they good? Hell yeah. So fight hard! Don't get intimidated and slow down. Playing a strong team is fun and exciting, or at least, I thought it would be. Who doesn't want to butt heads with the best?

Ugh, damn it, I'm so angry! I caught Cap alone later and told him all of this stuff. At first I thought he was mad, and I guess I was yelling. But he didn't say a word, he just sat on a bench by the field and let me go until my lungs hurt.

When I finished, he clasped his hands like a teacher and said, "There's another tournament in the fall. We'll face them again. If you have any ideas for training or strategies, you know where to find me."

That was it. He didn't defend himself or get mad or anything, he just got up and left. Doesn't he care?!

Oh, I show him. I'll come up with the best strategy and training ever. It will be hell's boot camp. The seniors won't know what hit them!

PS: I did some stuff with Sora and her friends. We went to the beach, and the girls were really hot. But we have DVDs of Jindai playing, and of our matches with them, and I need to watch them and think of a plan.

**15/09/06**

**Sunday**

**Takenouchi Sora**

I think there's poetry and beauty in the changing of seasons, but it's always sad to see the summer pass, even if it does give way to autumn leaves. And that's especially true this year.

I don't know if I've ever had a better summer. I spent a lot of time with Mimi-chan, I saw Yamato perform, I saw one of Taichi-kun's tournament matches, and I joined Eimi-chan, Jyou-kun, and Koushiro-kun for a few of their study sessions. I made new designs and sewed a few outfits.

I really enjoyed Yamato's performance. I can't explain it well, but it's strange to see someone you know step onstage. In that moment, he wasn't functioning as Yamato; his job was to lead the band and be the face for it. And it makes me feel kind of superficial, but he's so handsome, and he sings so well, and the bass looks so good slung around his shoulder, and...

Did you know there are girls at our school who call themselves his fan club? I guess I always understood why that's so, but I thought it was silly. Now I think I'm in danger of becoming a new fan girl.

But I won't! I won't, because what matters is a person's heart. That thought saved me for a week or so, but then we went to the beach, and I remembered that I already like him as a person.

Yamato is... He's serious and private. It can be hard to talk to him and to build a relationship, which is a pity, because he's very interesting. He knowledgeable about music, art, and style, he's smart, and he has a lot of empathy.

I talked to him for a long time on the beach about our families and how we grew up. I didn't know his parents are divorced. Mine are... it's complicated. My father is a researcher, and he's almost always traveling. I was mostly raised by my mother, and it seems that Yamato has lived with just his father for a long time, too. He has a younger brother, and I think he must really love him. He looked pained when he explained that they don't live together, and they haven't for years.

I love my father, but I hardly ever see him. As a child, I sometimes wished that my mother traveled and that my father stayed at home, or I daydreamed that we were all together. It must be even worse for Yamato, missing both his brother and his mother.

Anyway, he has all of this going on in his head, and yet there are all of these girls who are after him because of how he looks. The world is an interesting place. There's always more to see, if you'd only take the time to explore.

I'm glad he didn't walk off with those older girls who flirted with him on the beach. He came back to our group, instead. I doubt his father would have allowed him to go with them, but still, I think he really did want to stay.

As I write this, I'm looking at the teddy bear he won for me at the festival. Can you believe it? I don't think a boy has ever given me something before, outside of relatives and obligation gifts. I'm trying to figure out if it means something, but I don't know what to think.

Oh, I don't even know how I feel. I must be feeling something new for him, because I keep trying to figure it out. I know I'm attracted to him- that's simple enough to understand. I know I'm happy when we end up together unexpectedly, like during the courage contest. I know I like him as a person.

But love? Even liking? I'm not sure. It all seems so soon... I only turned sixteen a few months ago! I've gotten to know him a bit, but it's not as if I know everything about him.

Oh, dear. I just realized that the girls in my year would hate me if they knew that Yamato gave me a present. Maybe I'll wait a little longer before I try to talk to Mimi-chan or Eimi-chan about this. Not that they would gossip. I just... This is all so fragile and new.

Why did he win me the bear? Was he just showing off? I know boys like to do that sometimes. I just don't know!

I hope this confusion passes soon...

**Author's Notes:**

**Jindai high:** This is a real public school in the Tokyo prefecture, but I don't know anything about it. I just searched for a list of schools in Tokyo and chose one at random to achieve a convincing sound XD

Hope you guys aren't too upset by my avoiding talking about everything through Taichi's perspective. I just wanted some variety, so I gave him soccer brain, which I don't this is a stretch for him XD

See you next week! Thanks for reading. And as always, a special thank you to my lovely reviewers :D


	12. September 3

**Voices**

September 3: 21st-27th

**15/9/21**

**Monday**

**Takenouchi Sora**

Although I miss the summer, this time of the year is always exciting. So much is happening at school! Our homeroom period is filled with choosing what to do at the cultural festival, we're practicing for Sports Day during gym, and some of our class and club activities are suspended for preparations. After focusing so much on school work all year, it's a nice change, but it does bring about its own pressures.

The biggest problem right now is choosing a culture fair activity for our class. Everyone wants something different, and some of us are very... vocal about it. I'm worried that if we keep arguing, the other classes will claim school resources before we can.

Personally, I'm not sure what we should do. Our class budget is pretty small, and everyone has different talents. Is there a way to make everyone happy?

It's fantastic weather for tennis, since the heat and the humidity are finally starting to pass. I was so surprised when I saw Yamato at my match on Saturday! He said it was only fair, since I went to his performance. I wonder if Mimi-chan told him about it? She keeps saying she 'ships' us. I looked up what that means. It was embarrassing.

I try to be aware of my relationship with Yamato, because I remember what happened to Mimi-chan when rumors that they were dating were spreading. But I haven't heard anything about me, and I think Mimi-chan's had an eye out for me, as well. I wonder if anything would happen if people think that we're growing closer? I wonder if we actually are?

Oh, I don't know! Choosing a cultural fair activity is the more immediate problem, and Taichi-kun keeps asking me which Sports Day event I want to participate in. I'll focus on that for now.

**15.9.22**

**Tuesday**

**Kido Jyou**

You'd think I'd be happy when our school work slows down and some of our normal activities are suspended in favor of autumn festivals, but I think I'm more stressed than ever. Even if club meetings are cut in half, I still have to go to cram school and keep up with my studies.

I always get stressed in autumn. Studying is my thing. School is what I'm good at, or at least I always thought it was before high school. It keeps getting harder and harder these days. But when you place me in the middle of a sports or culture festival, it quickly becomes obvious that I have no other talents. What would I do if we put on a play or had a concert? Have you ever heard me sing or act? And I might actually be worse at sports. Not sure. My brothers complain that my singing is a form of torture.

In other news, Mimi-chan returned my sweater, and the pockets were stuffed with baggies of home made cookies! I still can't believe it, even though I'm sitting here looking at what's left. My mom's the only woman who has ever baked something just for me... I'm trying not to read into it too much. It's probably just a gesture of gratitude. Right?

Either way, I'm not sharing these cookies with anyone.

**September 23, 2015**

**Wednesday**

**Anami Eimi**

Dear Kitty,

Things are getting so interesting! I'm so excited about the Cultural Fair! The Teenage Wolves will be auditioning later in the week for a performance spot in the auditorium, and our class will be doing something, too, but we can't decide what! Mimi-chan wants to turn our classroom into a sweet shop for the day, a lot of people want us to have a musical performance, some want haunted houses and plays, and we can't decide on anything, and homeroom is basically an extended battle where everyone talks over everyone. There's got to be a compromise in here somewhere...

Meanwhile, Taichi-kun keeps asking me what athletic event I want to do. I'm not good at that stuff at all... Jyou-kun says there's an event where you toss beanbags into elevated baskets. That's... That's probably about my speed. Mimi-chan is trying to talk me into joining our class's cheer squad. Whaaaat? Have you ever seen me dance?

Oh, speaking of Mimi-chan, we had a strange conversation yesterday. She asked me how to get along better with Koushiro-kun, which surprised me. I thought she... kind of disliked him, and she said that she wants to have a good relationship with everyone in our group. My second question was why she thought I could teach her anything about him. It's not like I'm some kind of... nerd whisperer.

God knows I tried to get out of that conversation, but Mimi-chan is, ah, difficult to discourage. I spent a lot of time dodging and stammering, but in the end, I told her that you can't expect Koushiro-kun to show friendship in the typical way. For example, he doesn't say hello with a lot of energy like Taichi-kun, or ask me if I feel well if I look down, like Jyou-kun and Sora-chan. But he does bring me textbooks and internet printouts if he thinks I'll find them useful or interesting. If you don't pay attention, you'll miss it. And being awkward and being rude are two different things, although people confuse them a lot!

I feel kind of weird about talking about Koushiro-kun like that, but if it helps Mimi-chan understand him, then I'm happy. I'm sure they can get along if they just meet each other half way.

Yours,

Eimi

**15/9/24**

**Thursday**

**Tachikawa Mimi**

Dear Diary,

Everything is so busy and active lately, and I love it! The Cultural Fair is coming, and I really wanted to host a sweet shop in our classroom. Can't you just see all of the goodies lined up in colorful jars? My girls and I would spend time baking at school, and Sora-chan could make cute little outfits for us to sell the sweets in!

But everyone had all of these other ideas, and it was a big argument! I think a lot of the girls wanted a concert so that Yamato-kun would perform in our classroom. Dummies, what do they expect to do while he's sitting there playing guitar? We're all supposed to work together.

Anyway, in the end, Sora-chan was the one who fixed things. She said, "Why can't we have a bazaar and do a little bit of everything?" So basically, I can sell baked treats and the succulents and cacti I cultivate, Yamato-kun can play in the background for mood music, people who want to cook can bring in little grills (the home ec lab is booked for the culture festival already), and so on. Cute idea, right? We can all bring our talents to the table!

I'm tired of being annoyed with Koushiro-kun, and really, he must be an okay kid if Sora-chan, Eimi-chan, and Jyou-kun like him, so I asked Eimi-chan how to make friends with him. She was really frustrating at first, trying to get out of the conversation, but I wouldn't let her get away!

And it was so worth it, because she said some hilarious things! At first, it was all normal enough- he shows affection differently, he's not trying to be rude, blah blah. But when I kept demanding more, she squished her face up, got quiet for a while, then said, "Well, I think you're expecting him to interact like a dog. Koushiro-kun's really more of a cat."

Catshiro! Can you believe it! I tried so hard not to laugh, and my eyes watered! She said, "When you come home, most cats don't run to the door and wag their tails like dogs. They maybe pop in to see who it is, exchange a look with you, and go about their business. If you respect their space and let them do their thing, eventually they will spend more time with you."

So yeah, maybe I should give Koushiro-kun some catnip, and we'll be besties! Oh my god!

Ahhhh, I do understand her, though. I guess I have to learn to let him do his thing without expecting him to do what most people do. He's definitely different.

Oh! So I gave Jyou-kun cookies when I returned his sweater, but I hid them in the pockets to surprise him, and he stammered so much when he thanked me the next day! _Adooooorableeee. _Poor guy, it seemed like he didn't know what had hit him!

I want to be on the cheerleading squad for our class on Sports Day! I want Sora-chan and Eimi-chan to join me, but I know we need Sora-chan for the female race. She's so athletic, she can get us lots of points! But Eimi-chan doesn't have an excuse, so I'm going to find a way to make her work it for the good of the class! I'm just trying to be a team player.

XOXOXO,

Mimi

**15/9/25**

**Friday**

**Yagami Taichi**

Man, I don't have time for the cultural fair. I have a soccer tournament to train for! At least I can treat prep for Sports Day as training.

Sora keeps trying to cheer me up after our tournament defeat. By now I've annoyed most of my friends by talking about soccer all of the time, but Sora always listens, and she even made some suggestions that I'm adding to my strategy. She's really smart!

I'm hoping to have my training schedule and strategies ready soon so that we have more time to practice, but it's hard when we spend so much time working on the events at school. You'd think I'd be happy that we're easing up on academics a little, but the cultural fair especially can kill a ton of time. That's why I want to do something quick and easy. If we do a play, I'd end up building set pieces after school. Same deal for a haunted house. I'm glad Sora suggested the bazaar thing. I'll just offer to man booths when my classmates want to look at the other exhibits. No prep work!

Plus, Mimi is apparently bringing home made sweets. Score! Think she'll notice if I swipe some? I get so freaking hungry! Jyou had cookies, I saw him try to eat them when he thought no one was looking. He wouldn't give me any, which I thought was weird. I'd almost say that a girl must have given them to him, since he was so touchy, but I mean... It's Jyou.

So I tried to talk to Koushiro about soccer tactics, because he's a walking brain, yeah? I bet he'd have lots of good ideas if he'd think about something other than computers. At first, he was all, "I'm not interested, Taichi-san," so I decided to speak his language and brought him a library book on tactics in sports. He just kind of looked at me and cocked an eyebrow when I handed it over, but I saw him flip through it during math class. (He never listens during math. I think he's about thirty years ahead of the teacher in his brain).

Oh yeah! I don't have much time, but I try to catch Sora's tennis matches when I can. They wear white polos and white little skirts, oh man. She looks amazing, I can't believe I get a free pass to just... look at her and watch her move. It's almost like dancing sometimes, except that they could probably decapitate someone with that raquet. I bet she'll move up in the club soon. Maybe I'm biased, but she seemed really good.

Alright, I got stuff to do. Later!

**15/9/26**

**Saturday**

**Ishida Yamato**

So much has been happening, I'm not sure I know where to begin. I guess I'll start with the good things so my tone won't be so annoyed the whole entry.

We won a spot in the auditorium, so we'll be performing both days. We're all really looking forward to the chance to perform for the school. Maybe we'll have a lot of new fans after this. We get to do two sets of three songs, and the guys and I decided to give one song slot to Eimi to thank her for her work. So now I guess we have to work with her to write something in her range and style. We have some time, so it shouldn't be a problem, but she seemed pretty overwhelmed. I hope she has some idea of what she'd want her song to be about.

I'm in luck for our class presentation, too, because it seems like I'll just have to sit around and play guitar. Maybe I can convince Eimi to sing sometimes, so I won't wear my voice out before the performance. It was so like Sora to suggest an activity that lets everyone play to their strengths. She knows that struggle really well.

Speaking of, I've been going to some of her matches lately. I went to show her support, but I didn't expect to enjoy them as much as I do. The matches are scheduled, so I can come just in time to see hers.

I'm pretty good at sports. I couldn't beat an athlete in their own sport, and someone who does a lot of running around would eventually beat me because of their endurance. But if I have to play beach volleyball with Taichi-kun, we're well matched for a few rounds. I know enough to recognize that Sora is talented. She's graceful but powerful, and she's always analyzing and thinking out there. And the uniform looks amazing on her.

I was having a great time going to her matches and talking to her afterward, and I was going to ask her to grab lunch with me last Sunday. But Taichi-kun was there, too. I couldn't believe it. I knew that they're friends, but I didn't think they were that close. I shouldn't be so angry; it's not like Taichi-kun did something wrong. But I was so aggravated when I saw him that I waved to Sora and left. No need to show her my bad side if I can avoid it.

I can't imagine something is going on there. Right? I mean, seriously. What are the odds of us liking the same person? We're so different! Of course, the more important thing is Sora's type...

Forget him. If he's there next time, I'll talk to Sora, anyway. Maybe I'll even bring Takeru. He's always interested in seeing something new, so he'll enjoy it. Besides, girls love that kid. I taught him well. Between the two of us, I'm sure we can convince Sora to go somewhere after the match.

_Without_ Taichi-kun.

**15.9.27**

**Sunday**

**Izumi Koushiro**

It's been an... interesting week.

Now that our class has decided on holding a bazaar for the culture festival, our president handed out a sign-up sheet to describe what we'll be doing. I wanted to offer my services covering booths while my classmates took their turn exploring the festival, but Taichi-san took the last slot. That means I have to set up my own booth or help someone else make items for theirs, and the only product I can make is a program.

I was discussing this difficulty with Eimi-san and Jyou-san over lunch when Mimi-san suggested that I man a computer repair booth. I was taken aback. Although I doubt people generally carry their computers to the culture fair, it was a thoughtful suggestion, and Jyou-san said that we would highlight it on our class's flier to give students and parents notice of the service. When I thanked Mimi-san, she smiled and returned to her conversation with Sora-san.

Things were awkward between us just a few days ago, so I'm not sure how to interpret this exchange.

Taichi-san approached me the following day on the topic of soccer tactics. At first, I was disinterested (not to mention still annoyed by his tossing me into the ocean), but I scanned the book during a free moment and found it more interesting than anticipated. I'm a bit alarmed to find myself intrigued by a topic Taichi-san put forth, but it's a new facet of strategy. I'm not sure if I can actually be of assistance, but perhaps it would be worth learning more about his team's defeat.

I felt obligated towards Eimi-san because of the events of the beach trip, and I've become aware of my mother's interest in hosting, so I offered to have a study session in my family's apartment today. I decided to restrict the first one to Eimi-san and Jyou-san to test the concept in a more controlled manner.

Again, I was surprised by my mother's enthusiasm. I tried to convince her that a study session didn't require more than tea and simple snacks, but somehow we ended up with a variety of homemade treats, infused water, and tea. Then mom convinced my friends to stay for dinner, which she proceeded to morph into a feast. With dessert. All told, I believe Eimi-san and Jyou-san were here for almost six hours.

My mother chatted with Eimi-san for a long time while she prepared dinner. Eimi-san kept wandering away from the table and the text books to watch her work. Soon, mom was teaching her how to cook and chatting with her, and I'm embarrassed to admit that I learned more about Eimi-san while listening to that single discussion than I've learned from months of being her classmate.

My mother asked her so many questions about her past and her family, her hobbies and her aspirations, her school life and her home life. I didn't know that she wants a pet cat, or that she has a brother, or that she lives with her grandmother. Why haven't I asked her such basic questions? What do I know about any of my friends? About Jyou-san?

I'm familiar with their basic personalities and the skills that they have exhibited at school. I've met Jyou-san's family, so I know a bit more about him. That's all.

I'm suddenly finding this rather uncomfortable.

When dinner was served, Jyou-san finally lost his hyper focus on school work and joined the conversation. My parents both seemed interested in them, and I was struck once more with how awkward my social skills are in comparison. While I try to be polite, I'm often disinterested in engaging the people around me. And when I am interested, I don't know how to express it. I've always been this way, and I suppose that's a large reason why I tend to avoid social interaction. It can seem futile when you're aware that you have no way of clearly communicating your intentions.

How did I manage to acquire the kinship of Eimi-san and Jyou-san? They aren't the type to be false, so their interest must be real. Eimi-san especially has proved that, placing me further in her debt with each instance.

I'm not sure what to think of all of this. I can't even determine if I should address the issue, or if I can. But I am beginning to feel that they deserve more effort on my part.

Life was much simpler before I met people beyond my family worth making that effort for.

**Author's note: **And there you have it! Thanks for reading! Feedback is, of course, always appreciated. Have a great weekend :D


	13. September 4

**Voices**

September 4: 28th-4th

**September 28, 2015**

**Monday**

**Anami Eimi**

Dear Kitty,

Sigh. Why am I on the cheer squad?

Well, I _know_ why. Mimi-chan signed me up for it on the Sports Day form, and when I went to change it during gym, Taichi-kun squished his face up thinking about it, looked me over (excuse me!), and said, "No, this is good. Perfect. You know how to project, right? I want to hear you cheering from way over there." He pointed to the far side of the field.

I tried to protest, but he asked me what I'd want to do instead, and the truth is that I wouldn't be very good at any of those things. I could do the beanbag toss, but I wouldn't be better than anyone else. Taichi-kun is right to point out that I can be the loudest cheerleader.

Sigh. Maybe if I stand next to Mimi-chan, no one will notice me.

So we have extra gym time to prep for Sports Day. I've spent a lot of time learning the dance steps. They're easy for me, because I'm exempt from the complicated stuff to keep cheering, and to lift the smaller girls. Can you believe Taichi-kun has me weight training for this?! I told him it's overkill, and he said, "What? Don't you want your body to work harder for you?"

I hate to say it, but he's right. It can't hurt to give my body has some basic strength and stamina. But I'm still kind of annoyed...

I went to Koushiro-kun's house on Sunday. It was so fun! I mean, I guess I didn't get as much studying done as I usually do, but I hung out with his mom a lot. Does that sound weird? Well, she's really nice, and her cooking is so good (sometimes I can't help asking Koushiro-kun for a bite of his lunch). My mom never taught me anything... It's like she didn't think I could do it. I _can_ do it, though! I helped Izumi-san make dinner. But even though I left home for a reason and I'm happier here, I miss my mom more than I thought I would.

I think Izumi-san is nicer, though. She asked me all kinds of things, like what I want to do when I'm older. I was kind of taken aback. I didn't have an answer, so I've been thinking about it.

Well, I want to learn how to cook so I can take care of myself when I graduate. I was so busy making a new life here that I forgot to think about what will happen in three years! Do I want to go to college here? In the states? How will I pay for it and support myself? How will I feed myself? At least my grandmother taught me how to clean and do laundry...

Zeus's nasty loin cloth, this is all too much to think about right now!

My more immediate problem is writing a song for our performance in November. Hiro's going to write me an easy guitar part for it- I think he's trying to make me feel legit, you know, singing and playing an instrument. My boys are really nice. I'm so touched that they thought of me... Some days, it's really hard to be in Japan. But usually, I feel so happy that I'm here and have all of these great friends and a sweet little grandma.

But I've never written a song from scratch before; usually I tweak Aki's stuff or fill in someone's half-finished lyrics. Sometimes I just toss in some English (there's a surprising amount of English in modern Japanese music). What am I supposed to write about?

Speaking of practices, Yama declared a holiday today. He's right that we've all been working hard and could use a break, but I know he helped Sora-chan and Mimi-chan test recipes for their bazaar baking. Who can blame him? Taste tester is a pretty sweet gig.

Anyway, I had some free time after school today. I guess I could have gone straight home, but I wandered around a bit. I ended up outside of the computer lab and peeking in. I was so surprised to see Koushiro-kun standing in front of the room and explaining something to everyone! He was using the projector and everything.

I know this is kind of intrusive, but the back door was open and the lights were out, so I just, uh... Stepped inside for a few minutes. He was talking about the math behind a programming problem, and I didn't really understand. But the kids were asking questions, and he answered them all so patiently and thoroughly. I don't know if I've ever heard him speak so much before. I knew he's good at teaching, since he's more or less pulled me through math, but... Wow.

It felt so weird to watch him, so familiar, but so new. I felt really proud that he was addressing so many people about what he likes, and that they obviously respect him. Passionate people are the best, aren't they?

But I think I also... I kind of wished that only _I_ knew how smart and special he is, or that he was only talking to me, or... something? But I wouldn't feel that way. It's oppressive.

When he finished, I slipped out of the room before he turned the light back on and went home. I decided to rest. I think there's something off with my head space, you know? I_ have_ been working really hard at school.

With that in mind, I'm going to go read a book.

Yours,

Eimi

**15.09.29**

**Tuesday**

**Izumi Koushiro**

Somehow, I've become our class's Sports Day tactician. That's sarcasm; the 'somehow' is Taichi-san, as always.

In return for placing me in a low-key event (why do I have to barter for this? Other people simply signed up), I am assisting Taichi-san in dividing our peers among the athletic events. I've helped him set up trial runs and so on, collect data, and distribute our classmates accordingly. Some of my peers are bothered by our strategic approach; like me, they would prefer to simply sign up for the events of our choice. I don't know why Taichi-san insists on winning our year's Sports Day events. I suppose it makes sense to perform at the best of our capabilities, but this seems a bit much. Thankfully, it's his duty to speak to unhappy athletes.

At the request of the computer club president, I gave a lecture at a meeting earlier in the week. I was hesitant to speak in front of my club mates, and to imply superior understanding of the topic. But I enjoyed answering questions and engaging them on a topic I'm interested in. I don't have many opportunities to discuss programming and math beyond what relates to everyday use and school curriculum.

Sora-san and Mimi-san have been distributing sweets at lunch for us to sample. I was very complimentary about them, partially because they were delicious, and partially to encourage the continued improvement of my relationship with Mimi-san. Eimi-san is usually excited to try something that one of our friends made, but today she seemed to deflate when Mimi-san passed the cookies around. I suppose I wouldn't typically notice something like that, but she's very obvious about these things. Her shoulders drooped, and she went silent.

I was baffled, so I asked my mother for an explanation. I think she tried to hide a smile with her hand, but I don't see why she would bother. After a pause, she said, "Maybe it's because she doesn't know how to bake. If you ask her to come over and study again sometime, I can teach her a recipe so she can contribute to the baking stand."

Eimi-san _has_ mentioned that she doesn't know how to cook or bake, and she does seem to regret it. I wonder why she's lacking in skills that my other female friends seem to have? I'm hesitant to suggest another study session so soon after the last, but I suppose we generally have them weekly, regardless...

**15/09/30**

**Wednesday**

**Ishida Yamato**

How does this crap end up happening?

I brought Takeru to Sora's tennis match last Sunday, and Taichi-kun was there, too. This time, I didn't back down. I brought Takeru over to meet her, and as always, he asked a lot of questions and was friendly. It's hard not to like someone who asks you about something you enjoy with genuine interest, especially when they have the Ishida/Takaishi looks. I think Sora liked him a lot.

But Taichi-kun took one look at him and put his back up. It turns out- can you _believe_ this?!- my brother and his sister are friends and classmates. The Hikari-chan Takeru mentions is _Yagami_ Hikari. And she sounded so pleasant based on Takeru's descriptions...

Alright. I'm getting out of line. If Takeru likes her, then I'm sure she's a good kid. But Taichi-kun is irritated because apparently his sister talks about Takeru, and now Taichi-kun has a face for Takeru, and that face is connected to mine.

And it annoys me even more that we're mutually bothered by this. I'm starting to feel like it's time to grow up and let go of this tension with Taichi-kun, but whenever I think about nudging things in that direction, he does something that bothers me all over again, like tagging along to lunch with Sora, Takeru, and me. And I can't even complain, because Sora said, "That sounds great, let's go," when I asked her, and naturally, 'let us' includes Taichi-kun.

Of course she wouldn't cut someone out. I should have been more careful about asking, but Takeru brought up lunch before I figured out how to get rid of Taichi-kun, and it snowballed from there.

At least I had some time with her the other day. I canceled a club meeting to help her and Mimi-chan with their baking. They were surprised that I know how to bake and cook. I was embarrassed at first, wondering if they thought it was feminine, but Mimi-chan started babbling about how "Every girl loves a boy who can cook." She elbowed Sora when she thought I wasn't looking (Or did she know that I was? I'm beginning to think that Mimi-chan is a lot more savvy than I gave her credit for).

I'm a little conflicted. I'm serious about my band, but I canceled a meeting to be with a girl. Am I being untrue or unfair to myself and the band? But we _are_ supposed to work together for the culture fair, and I don't have any specific prep work because I'll be providing music. And I do think a break is beneficial every now and then...

I wonder if I should talk to someone about Sora. I can't, though. This isn't the kind of thing I can just blab about. Who would I even go to? Maybe if Takeru were a little older... No. This is something I have to figure out on my own.

**15.10.01**

**Thursday**

**Kido Jyou**

What's the deal with Taichi-kun's brain? He moves and talks, so it must be functioning. But I wonder sometimes...

We were working on an experiment today, and he was handling an acid. Instead of, you know, paying attention, he was looking over his shoulder and talking to Koushiro-kun about soccer, of all things. His hand kept tipping more and more, until 6 molar acid leaked out of the vial and onto his skin.

And he didn't react at all! I was making calculations, and I didn't look up until it dripped onto my notebook. When I realized what was happening, I grabbed him and marched him to the nearest sink while he tried to get away.

He wasn't wearing his gloves, because of course he wasn't. He had to take his blazer, shirt, and tie off- luckily for everyone, he had an undershirt. He started wincing when I switched gloves and cleaned his arm under the faucet. Our teacher and Eimi-chan neutralized the spill while I flushed his skin. There's really not much else to do for an acid burn.

It's not like in the movies, where green goo bubbles and disintegrates everything. It just burns, bleaches, and distorts the skin. You'd have to use a really dramatic chemical and not treat the affected area to see an immediate change. Those chemicals do exist, but not in a school lab.

So he was fine, but I was upset at Taichi-kun for neglecting his safety like that, and the safety of the people around him. How many times do I have to tell him that a lab is a dangerous environment? What if he had dropped the vial, and it splashed onto someone else? Eimi-chan and Koushiro-kun work right next to us!

But I think he actually listened to me this time. At least there's that. His apology seemed sincere. I'm glad he's alright.

In other news, I didn't know what to do for the culture fair, so Mimi-chan enlisted me as her helper. Anyone who knows Mimi-chan should feel at least a twinge of anxiety at being named her assistant, no matter how much they may like her. I asked her to go easy on me. She laughed.

What _is_ it about her? She makes me weak in the knees, but I'm eager for more. It's like I'm a glutton for punishment, but it's not really punishment at all, except that it is, because I'm sure she doesn't feel this way about me. She's just being herself, that's all, and it turns me into a nervous wreck. I mean, I guess I'm always kind of a nervous wreck, but this is different, because it's exciting, too, but also depressing, because... I'm just a plain kid who's wound too tight and lives with his head in textbooks.

I wonder if my brothers have ever gone through this before? Should I ask? I don't want to be teased... They always seem to have everything together. I wish I were more like them.

**15/10/02**

**Friday**

**Tachikawa Mimi**

I'm having so much funnnn, I love autumn! I get to spend time at school scolding Eimi-chan until she shakes her hips properly, teasing Sora-chan where Yamato-kun can see it, baking, feeding treats to my friends, and making Jyou-kun sweat. It should always be like this!

You know, I was thinking. I really miss the parties and group outings we used to have in America. It's hard to throw parties here because we have school six days a week and club events on the weekends, but maybe I'll just put my foot down and demand that everyone come to a party on a Sunday. We can miss one club event! You're only a kid once! Let's have a party!

So, does anyone else see Yamato-kun and Taichi-kun making googly eyes at Sora-chan? And don't even get me started on Eimi-chan. I'm seriously seconds away from shoving her into Koushiro-kun so they can just kiss and get it out of their systems already. Problem is that I don't think Koushiro-kun is interested, but he's really hard to read. What a waste... I hope Eimi-chan will be okay. How could a boy not like a girl who likes him so much? Maybe he's too oblivious to see it. Should I tell him? Maybe a hint would be okay? Would he even notice a hint?

Probably not. Sigh.

But anyway, I feel bad for Taichi-kun, because it's Yamato-kun that Sora-chan likes. She was so impressed by his baking. I was kind of pissed that his chocolate chip cookies tasted better than mine. He said it's because they're his brother's favorite. God, that line even got _me_ a little. I think Sora-chan nearly melted.

But I make better brownies and snickerdoodles, so there!

But Taichi-kun is always near her. He really doesn't know how to show his interest; he acts just like a friend. I wonder if he's okay. He always talks about soccer, but lately he's obsessed. He's not going to score any points with Sora-chan (or the rest of us!) if he can't think of anything but soccer ever.

Maybe that's why he poured acid on himself the other day during science class... But he's okay, because Jyou-kun stepped in. He's so good at taking care of people. Before I even knew what was happening, he was already helping Taichi-kun take his clothes off (I think all the girls appreciated that!) and washing his arm. Isn't it cool that he always knows what to do? If someone is hurt or in trouble, he's there. He just steps up without hesitation. He didn't have to help Taichi-kun, you know? He could have let the teacher deal with it. Most people would have.

Oh, I have to call Sora-chan about a recipe. Later!

XOXOXO,

Mimi

**15/10/03**

**Saturday**

**Yagami Taichi**

Damn, but I need a win. I really, _really_ need one. All I can think about is soccer and Jindai. And crushing Jindai. At soccer. Do you see my problem?

Man, I dunno. Sora told me that I might be overdoing it, and Koushiro said that my strategy proposal for the captain is as good as it will get. Jyou keeps saying I need to focus- I dropped a chemical the other day. Mimi's words of wisdom were, "Oh my GOD, stop it with the soccer stuff!" And I caught Eimi going blank-faced when I was talking to her. She zoned out and had no idea what I was saying.

I watched so many recordings of Jindai and our team, and especially of Jindai kicking our asses. I read about the psychology of sports and convinced Koushiro to help me with my tactics. My plan is ready. I have to go show it to the captain. But what if it isn't good enough? I've always just prepped my body and played as hard as I could. It was always enough. Suddenly it's not even close. If I'm not good at soccer, what _am_ I good at?

Forget it. I'm going to turn this in, and it's going to work. AND my class is going to win Sports Day for our year. We can do this!

I probably shouldn't be spending part of Sunday watching Sora play tennis, but I need some down time. Yamato was there, and he brought his brother. I couldn't believe it when he introduced himself as Takaishi Takeru. That's Hikari's friend! How is he Yamato's brother? They have different family names!

Well... He did seem like a nice kid. Really friendly, smiles a lot. Maybe talks too much. Much more likable than Yamato, who suggested going to lunch, then hardly said a word.

Why did he come to Sora's match? Are they friends? Does Yamato even have friends? He's such a loner. I always thought he just had his band, and he went to the ocean because Eimi invited him. But even though he hardly talks and spends so much time by himself, the girls all love him, and apparently Sora is friends with him...

You don't think... Geez, I wish Eimi would pair up with him. I always thought she was the only girl he talked to, other than his being Sora's lab partner.

I don't know. Maybe I should tell her how I feel. But how do you date, anyway? Would I even have enough time for it with all of this soccer stuff? Damn, sometimes I feel like I don't know anything about anything.

I just need a win, man.

**15/10/04**

**Sunday**

**Takenouchi Sora**

I feel a little overwhelmed recently. There's so much going on and so much to think about!

This weekend, both Yamato and Taichi came to my tennis match, and Yamato even brought his younger brother. I didn't know until after the match- can you imagine how embarrassed I would have been if I lost?

It's so surprising... Mimi-chan and Eimi-chan have both seen a match here and there, but suddenly these two keep showing up, and... Why? And why would Yamato bring his brother? And why did Takeru-kun grin and say, "I'm so happy to finally meet you. My brother talks about you all the time"?

When he said that, Yamato suddenly looked away, staring into the tennis court. I think I paused for a second and said something like, "Oh, the pleasure's mine. Yamato's told me all about you."

And he has, honestly. I think music, his band, and his brother are his favorite topics. But do you think he talks about me with Takeru-kun as much as he talks about Takeru-kun with me?

These days, I often find myself holding that teddy bear from the festival and just... trying to figure this out. I think I like him. I look forward to seeing him and talking to him, and sometimes my pulse goes a little crazy when he smiles. And when he sings and plays, it's like I can't believe my eyes and my ears. But- and I hope this isn't crazy- I think because he's so attractive and talented and smart, I keep wondering if I actually like _him_.

Logically, I know I do. I've spent a lot of time talking to him by now. But... Well, I guess I'm a teenager, and I'm still trying to figure myself out. This all seems really sudden and intimidating. Maybe it's time to open up to someone about it, but it's not easy...

I'd like to talk to Taichi about it, since he helped so much last time, but I know he doesn't like Yamato, and I'm starting to wonder why he's coming to my matches all of a sudden. I think this was the third time, and I don't think he was happy about Yamato and Takeru-kun being there. Our lunch together was a little... stiff, except for Takeru-kun, who was so cheerful and talkative. Why did I feel like I was in the middle of a ring of aggression? If they don't like one another, why didn't one or the other leave?

Probably male pride. They both have that. But I'm trying to figure out what they could be fighting over, and the only solution seems to be...

But it can't be _me_. That's just silly. No, I'm internalizing again, or over thinking, or something. I'm going to go work on a design, try to clear my head.

**Author's Notes: **Thanks for reading! I hope you're having a fun autumn!


	14. October 2

**Voices**

October 2: 12th-18th

**15/10/12**

**Monday**

**Yagami Taichi**

We kicked ass on Sports Day! It was so freaking awesome! Everyone did a great job, and all of our training and planning paid off. We didn't just win among the first years. We _dominated_.

I did one of the longer dashes, the tug of war, and of course the relay race that we end the festival with. We were lagging behind in the relay race, which is the highest scoring event of the day, but never underestimate a soccer player. No one eats up a field like we do. Haha, I dunno, it was so cool to watch the gap shrink. It was like, "Oh, a gap? What gap? SORRY SUCKER! SEE YA!"

I handed off the baton to Junpei, who is in the track club, and he held the lead, and my classmates went nuts! It was great! I'm sitting here trying to remember more details, but I was so busy all day, trying to make sure everyone was raring to go and knew what they had to do. It's kind of a blur.

Luckily, Hikari came and took a lot of pictures. I wish she wouldn't push herself giving everyone water, but I know that's part of her personality. It's why she's so damned lovable. But if any of the high school boys took a shine to her, I'll give them so much hell.

So somehow, I ended up directly behind Yamato during the tug of war. Maybe this was stupid of me, but I ended up taking a few digs at him to make him pull harder. I was fired up and feeling cocky, I guess. Usually when I talk to him like that, he gets pissy and Sora steps in, so there could have been a big problem in the middle of a tug of war round. But this time, he laughed, shot a line right back at me, and pulled harder. We went back and forth until tugging took up all of our focus.

Huh. What happened there? Has he finally gotten a chill pill prescription? Or maybe he was trying to play it cool in front of his kid brother? Who knows. I could maybe actually get along with him if he were always like that.

And if he hadn't danced with Sora so damned much.

I dunno, sometimes I wonder... He has to like her, right? That's why he's like... always around. But what about her? Does she like him? Does she like anyone? It's kind of hard to figure out what she's thinking sometimes.

At least I got to dance with her, too.

Anyway... I got my win in a big way. I'm coming for you next, Jindai!

**15.10.13**

**Tuesday**

**Izumi Koushiro**

Sports Day took place on Saturday, and I'm relieved that it's finally behind me. While the beanbag toss was hardly demanding physically, the passing of Sports Day frees me from increased time spent in gym class, and from assisting Taichi-san in his preparations.

Incredibly, he insisted on training me for the beanbag toss. I spent a lot of time throwing bags into hoops these last few weeks. How mind-numbing... I tried to make the repetitive motion more interesting by applying height and angles to calculate the force and arc of the perfect toss. I found that my accuracy did improve when I took these factors into consideration, if only slightly. I scored well in the actual event, which is a relief. I received a distracted smack on the back from Taichi-san afterward, rather than a lecture, and was allowed to sit on the edge of the field undisturbed for the rest of the day.

Taichi-san, Sora-san, and Yamato-san participated in a few events each, but I think Eimi-san and Mimi-san had the most demanding job. They cheered and danced all day, from early morning through the evening. By the time the events ended and the bonfire began, Eimi-san could hardly speak audibly or move.

I wanted to help somehow, but I didn't know what to do, and Jyou-san hovered over the two of them. I ended up standing by awkwardly while Jyou-san tended to them and tried to convince Mimi-san to skip the folk dance. In the end, she pulled Jyou-san into the dance, leaving Eimi-san sitting on the grass. I had no interest in dancing, so I joined her.

Her voice was like a croak, and she seemed sore and miserable, so I didn't engage her much. My mother always brings people tea when they don't feel well, so I brought her some from the tent nearby. I can't be sure if it helped. I have enough difficulty interpreting social situations when both parties can speak.

Now that I think about it, she was silent today. Perhaps communication by email would be more comfortable for her while her throat heals? I suppose it couldn't hurt to try.

**15/10/14**

**Wednesday**

**Tachikawa Mimi**

Dear Diary,

Ahh, the Sports Festival was so much fun! They had Field Day in America, but this is a lot more of an event. There's so much going on all day, and the cheerleaders are at the heart of it all, keeping everyone pumped!

It was so fun to dance, sing, and twirl all day! And you know, we won for our year, both as a cheer team and as a class. Naturally, we're the best! And my girls were so hot, working it all day long.

I guess I do feel a little bad, though... I didn't realize how hard it was on Eimi-chan. She kept working the whole time without complaining, but at the end of the day, she was all croaky and sore. Why didn't she just _tell_ me she needed a break? That was all she had to do! And she's been all quiet since then…

I felt like maybe Taichi-kun and I shouldn't have put so much pressure on her. I kept praising her and telling her that we needed her to lift the girls, and Taichi-kun kept telling her to cheer louder, and... Well, it's not my fault she didn't tell me she was tired!

But I brought everyone more goodies I'm trying out for the Culture Festival. I made her chocolate cupcakes because I thought it would perk her up, and she smiled, but it was fake- I can tell! I think it actually upset her somehow, and don't think I didn't see her give half of it to Jyou-kun! What is she thinking? Why won't she talk, like a normal person?! Ugh!

Oh, speaking of Jyou-kun, though... He was so cute, fawning over Eimi-chan and me after the festival. He really will make a great doctor, as long as his patients don't mind his hovering. But enough was enough, and I wanted to dance, so I dragged him into the line mid lecture. He's a horrible dancer, even with a simple folk dance, but it's okay. He would have performed the steps better if he could tear his eyes away from me.

You know... I hate to get into this, but Sora-chan approached me the other day about Jyou-kun again. I know he likes me. That's an understatement. It's all over his face and his body, and even his voice. Sora-chan was all hesitant and nervous when she said it, but she was like, "He's a really nice guy, and I'm worried about his feelings."

I mean, I'm not leading him on, though. He's a friend. He's done some really nice things for me, and I appreciate him. Am I supposed to cut him off because he likes me and I don't like him back? I like him as a person and look up to him. I wish I could be a little more selfless, like he is. Wouldn't it hurt his feelings more to treat him coldly? Am I supposed to tell him that I not in love with him, so he should hit the road? I mean, love? I'm sixteen!

I dated a few guys in America, and it was fun and all, but I like being single more. I just want to have fun, and the boys always want more than I can give them, whether it's physical or emotional. Besides, I can't really imagine kissing Jyou-kun... Haha, he'd probably pass out!

No, things are fine as they are. I know Sora-chan has everyone's best interests at heart, so I'm not mad at her, but she's wrong about this. Jyou-kun and I are good friends, and I'm not throwing that away. He's a smart guy that you can count on. He knows how to handle himself.

XOXOXO,

Mimi

**15/10/15**

**Thursday**

**Takenouchi Sora**

If you ask me, Taichi was probably a little too invested in Sports Day for his own good. I was worried about him. But it paid off; our class really worked together and flourished on Sports Day, and he was at the center of it.

Everyone was working so hard... Mimi-chan and Eimi-chan kept dancing and cheering all day to keep our spirits high. Taichi was somehow everywhere at once when he wasn't in an event, pumping everyone up. Koushiro-kun and Jyou-kun tried their hardest, even though they weren't especially interested. I could tell that Yamato was really focused during his events. I was so surprised when he ran. I knew he was naturally athletic after playing beach volley ball with him, but I didn't know he could win events against people on the track team. He told me he would lose in a longer race, and that's why he chose a dash instead of the relay event. Apparently he has natural skill, but not much endurance.

He really can do anything, can't he? He's smart, musical, attractive, and athletic. I want to encourage him to develop his athletic skill, but we only have so much time. I suppose music just means more to him.

I won my dash and the three-legged race with Mariko-chan. This might sound funny, but Taichi and Koushiro-kun paired us by height and similar top speed. Although we're friends and club mates, we didn't pick one another on our own. Taichi really became obsessed with strategy ever since losing to Jindai, and somehow, Koushiro-kun was pulled into it...

I really admired how Taichi took charge of everything. Part of me thinks it wasn't really necessary, but all the work we did brought us closer as a class, and isn't that one of the goals of team sports? And I've never seen someone so naturally able to support everyone on his team. It's like he radiates energy and positive feelings and never runs out. He was still going strong during the dancing at the end of the day, even though Eimi-chan and Koushiro-kun were so exhausted, and I was feeling some strain, too. I danced almost the entire time, though. People used to dance frequently, but it's not done much anymore, other than maybe bobbing around at a club.

Still, Yamato was a good dancer. Most people were self-conscious and stiff, obviously paying attention to their feet. He smiled and looked at his partner the whole time, and I thought it was gallant of him to offer Mimi-chan and Eimi-chan a dance. Not that they didn't have anyone to dance with or anything. I could tell that he was... How do I say it? Paying respects. Honoring his friendship with them. Being chivalrous, basically. Oh... Do I sound like I'm gushing? I'm not. It was just nice. Refreshing.

Mimi-chan danced with Jyou-kun a lot. I was really worried about it, because it's not my place, but Jyou-kun is a nice person, and I always worry that... Well, that Mimi-chan might be... Kind of leading him on by accident. Thankfully, she wasn't offended when I broached the topic, but she obviously didn't want to keep talking about it. I said my bit as gently as I could and bowed out. I hope she knows what she's doing...

I can't blame her, though. I feel like I don't know what I'm doing around Yamato sometimes... I wish I were more mature, and understood my own feelings more. I wish I had an older sister to ask. I'm sure my mother wouldn't be impressed if I talked to her about a boy when I'm supposed to be focusing on school and the future of our family's Ikebana school...

Well... We had a great Sports Day. Good job, everyone.

**15.10.16**

**Friday**

**Kido Jyou**

I thought that opting out of the athletic events to volunteer in the medical tent would be less stressful for me, but boy, was I wrong. Isn't it strange how some people can run outside around all day and be fine, like Taichi-kun, and some get woozy and faint after an hour? Luckily, none of my friends took ill- I was glad to see that Koushiro-kun chose a low-impact event- but several students had some form of exposure issue. That's why there's a group of parents who are against Sports Day and try to get it canceled every year.

I would say that I side with them, but honestly? The kids who take ill as a result of exercise should probably start a soft exercise routine and work their way up to a healthy tolerance for physical activity, unless they have some kind of condition. When will people learn to take care of their bodies...

Well, no one was seriously hurt or ill, so it went well. I even danced with Mimi-chan a few times. I can't decide if it was amazing or terrible. I know I'm a pathetic dancer, but who wouldn't want to be that close to her? Besides, I don't know if I could say no to her if I wanted to.

Isn't that pathetic? We're not even together, but I'm so hopeless around her. And since everyone else knows about it, I assume she does, too. She's never brought it up, so I guess... Well, of course she's not interested. I should probably try to get over my infatuation. But it's not a cold or a virus. It's not like I can take a pill or get a shot, or even sleep it off...

Really, I should just be grateful that she and my other friends are in my life. Can I really complain when I get to see her smile and greet me everyday?

I'm... just going to ignore that twinge I just felt.

**15/10/17**

**Saturday**

**Ishida Yamato**

Have you ever felt a begrudging admiration for someone's talent before? It's no secret that I don't like Taichi-kun, but I can't deny that he pushed us to victory at the Sports Festival. It's not just that he won a few dashes and gave us the lead in the relay race. He spent the whole time sliding from contestant to contestant, pumping them up and encouraging them. He always knew how to get under someone's skin- ribbing Sora, taunting me, encouraging Eimi, challenging Mimi, and annoying Koushiro-kun. It's like he just swings our panel open and starts mashing the buttons inside until we're in fight mode. And he was like that with every single one of our classmates, not just our friends.

It was obnoxious, but it worked. And if we're participating in Sports Day, we might as well win. I don't... think I could do that. I always thought Taichi-kun was clueless and I'm fairly empathetic, but...

Maybe his brain only works on a field?

Whatever. The day was his; I can admit it.

Takeru and Hikari-chan came to watch us after their classes let out. I tried to sign up for afternoon events, but they missed tug-of-war. We won; Taichi-kun kept needling me as we pulled until we were both too out of breath to trade insults.

I hung out with them when we had down time, and I have to say, I'm impressed by Hikari-chan. She volunteered to help Jyou-kun and the other medical attendants carry water to the athletes, and naturally Takeru couldn't sit there while she worked. She has a calm, mature demeanor. I'm wondering how my brother struck up a friendship with her. I love him, but he's... sometimes he can be a little... much.

But what am I saying? He's my brother. Of course the girls love him.

I did well in the hundred meter dash and the obstacle course. It was kind of embarrassing. I would have chosen something else, but as Koushiro explained, we needed a well-rounded athlete who wasn't participating in one of the more trying events to win the obstacle course. It took two baths to wash all of the flour out of my hair...

Oh yeah, Aki and Hiro ran the three-legged race for class 1-B. It was hilarious. They ended up arguing in the middle of the track, like some kind of Osakan slapstick pair. Naturally, they came in last, and Sora took the race with one of her friends from tennis club.

There was a bonfire and folk dancing afterward. I danced with Sora a few times, but so did Taichi-kun, and a few other guys danced with her, too. It's not a big deal; it's just line dancing. There's very little physical contact. I wonder if she knows any other dances? I realized then that I don't know much about dancing, and it seems like something a man should know how to do. A lot of guys neglect things like dancing, cooking, personal style, and courtesy towards women. I don't want to be one of them. You should be able to entertain and care for your partner and your female friends.

Maybe I'll ask her if she likes to dance.

**October 18, 2015**

**Sunday**

**Anami Eimi**

Dear Kitty,

I will never, _ever_ join another cheer squad again. I don't care if our squad won the most points for our year. I don't care if Mimi-chan says I'm sexy and Taichi-kun tells me I did well. My throat was like firey sandpaper for a while, and I was convinced that my arms would fall off at my shoulders if I lifted another girl. They look so tiny, but they get heavy after a while! And my back!

I sound like an old woman, but it was really hard. I should have done a sack race or something...

I didn't even get to dance at the bonfire... I was looking forward to it, since my band mates promised to teach me the steps, but I was just too tired and miserable. Jyou-kun fussed over Mimi-chan and me until she convinced him to dance. It was so funny- he was still begging her to rest while she tugged him into the line!

But I was surprised when Koushiro-kun sat with me. I mean, I guess he wouldn't want to dance, but still... I couldn't even talk to him, but he kept me company. We just sat there and watched the dancers. They were moving around a fire, so their bodies made dark shadows with endless, swaying arms and legs. He even brought me tea, and it tasted awful, but it felt good on my throat. It seems like something Jyou-kun would do naturally, but did Koushiro-kun always think of things like that?

Mimi-chan danced with a lot of guys, but I think Jyou-kun is the only one she danced with more than once. I think that was a talking point in most of the Austen novels. Ooooh, Mr. Kido favored her with multiple dances. What a portent! Haha, I know I'm being silly, but I can't help hoping that Mimi-chan might like Jyou-kun. He's such a good guy, and he's so into her... I swear I could see him blushing when they danced, even in the dark.

But while I sit here shipping Jyou-kun and Mimi-chan, I have to say that I don't know what's going on with Sora-chan. I mean, it's just a bonfire dance. It doesn't mean anything. But Taichi-kun and Yamato-kun looked really invested when they danced with her... It makes me nervous. I want everyone to be happy, but... Well, there's only one Sora-chan.

It's been a few days now, but I'm still a little sore and tired. Yama sent me directly home after school on Monday and Tuesday because of my rasping, but it's not like I'm sick, so I got to stay after that.

Or maybe I _am _sick? I don't know. I feel kind of… off? Usually I feel fine, other than the soreness. But sometimes I have palpitations and flushing. Even weirder, sometimes I feel nervous without really knowing why. I wonder if I'm too stressed out with school stuff? There _is_ a lot going on lately... Should I ask Jyou-kun?

Koushiro-kun has started texting and emailing me lately. He actually says a lot more that way than he usually does in person. Funny how that works for some people. It's really nice to get to know him more. I wonder if he emails any of the others?

Oh, hey! Speaking of, he just texted me. Later!

Yours,

Eimi

**Notes:**

**-Obstacle course and flour:** One of the common obstacle course obstacles is a pan filled with flour. The contestant has to, er… Stick their face in the flour and find a hidden object (usually a coin) with their mouth. I'm wondering how Koushiro and Taichi convinced Yamato to join the obstacle course! I assume some of the obstacles are actually athletic xD But I don't actually know!

**-Osakan slapstick pair: **It's a type of comedy team popular in Osaka where one person is "the angry guy" who reacts to the silly behavior of "the stupid guy." More precisely, this humor style is called _manzai_, and is comprised of the straight man/hothead (_tsukkomi_) and the wise guy/idiot (_boke_). Think Laurel and Hardy. Based on what we know about Yama's band, Hiro was probably screaming at Aki for his poor performance in the race XD

Hey guys! Voices updates may be a bit sparse until November, since I'm working on a Halloween story called _The Ouija Board_. It's a lot of fun, so if you want to get in the Halloween spirit, give it a read! But I should be updating fine throughout November because of Nanowrimo, so stick around! Thanks for reading and reviewing :)


	15. October 4

**Voices**

October 4: 26th-1st

**15.10.26**

**Monday**

**Kido Jyou**

Everyone is so excited about the Culture Festival. Isn't this supposed to be a school? It's so hard to focus on work when there's all of this random stuff in the classroom, and everyone is working on and talking about other things.

But… It _is_ important to take breaks every now and then. I guess it's alright. At least I still have cram school to help me stay on my toes.

My friends have been weird lately… Sora-chan and Mimi-chan are practically ruling the class. So many of our classmates look to them for instructions, and Sora-chan is so capable, and Mimi-chan's excitement is infectious. It makes me happy to see her in such good spirits, even if her commands are a bit much sometimes. You wouldn't believe how often I've been in her apartment lately. Her room is so cute, filled with pink things and plants. She has this hard core vanity with a huge mirror, its own lighting, and built in shelving units for her makeup. I did _not_ realize that being beautiful was so much work. How does she find the time? And don't even get me started on her closet.

Like an idiot, I was so nervous to meet her parents. Her mother is like her, cheerful and direct. But I think Mimi-chan may have more social awareness; sometimes I feel her working me like a marionette, but I don't even mind. They call that being whipped, don't they.

Her father is so doting. As far as he's concerned, Mimi-chan is a legitimate princess. It's tempting to think that he's spoiling her, but obviously I'm in no position to judge. I can see my own strings attached to her fingers, after all…

I have to say that Taichi-kun has been impressing me lately. He's using his skills to talk to people and bring back information for our classmates, and he makes us laugh when the hours of working on the bazaar run long. It's a little weird to look at him and not think that he's slacking off. Don't get me wrong, he's still the same old Taichi-kun, but he's trying harder. It's really all I asked.

Eimi-chan and Yamato-kun are really wrapped up in their club's performance. I can understand, but I wish Yamato-kun would remember that we have the class bazaar, as well. He helps out when Sora-chan asks him to, but otherwise he's off by himself with his guitar or talking to Eimi-chan about her song while she paints pots. Even worse is when girls gather around him while he plays instead of doing their jobs…

I've been kind of worried about Eimi-chan lately. Sometimes when I talk to her, her eyes shift and start looking through me, and I know she drifted off. When I asked, she told me she's been feeling off, so I had my dad look at her. He said it's probably stress, so I tried to teach her meditation, but I'm not sure that it sunk in.

Who knows what she's thinking? I tried to ask Koushiro-kun, but that was about as useful as you'd imagine. I saw Mimi-chan looking at her and… What's the right word? Giggling? Cooing? You know how girls look when they see a puppy or a baby? Something kind of like that.

After that, I decided to step back. If it makes Mimi-chan_ that_ pleased, then it's too dangerous for me.

As for Koushiro-kun, he's been spending more time with Taichi-kun. It seems like a weird combination, but apparently he's keeping track of the information Taichi-kun brings back. I know it's none of my business, but I'm glad that he's branching out a little more. I was surprised when I saw him texting Eimi-chan in the genkan; apparently they walk home together sometimes if their clubs happen to let out at the same time. He seems to be paying her more attention lately, but it's so hard to read him. I want to say that he's come a long way from the kid who just tolerated our presence at the beginning of the year, but… Hm. He's present more, and he speaks more, but he's still holding back more than he gives.

Geez, I sound like a mother hen, don't I? I guess I can't help worrying about everyone. This probably sounds belittling, but I feel like they'd be in trouble if I don't keep an eye on them. You have to admit that they're… an _interesting_ group of people. Sometimes it feels like only Sora-chan, Eimi-chan, and I have our heads on straight, and Eimi-chan's slipping into the dubious category herself lately.

I'm a little sad that my father and brothers are too busy to attend the festival, but my mother will be there. She's excited about it. She's met some of my friends during study sessions, but she keeps saying she wants to see them all together. I guess we do make for a colorful picture. I hope things don't get too out of hand…

Says the person who is currently watching Mimi-chan try to paint gold dots on Eimi-chan's face while Yamato-kun and Taichi-kun argue about which one of Sora-chan's sweets taste the best.

Send help.

**15.10.27**

**Tuesday**

**Izumi Koushiro**

The Culture Festival is approaching quickly, and the fliers announcing our bazaar, including my computer repair service, have been distributed. We've been spending homeroom, some class hours, and some time after school transforming our classroom into an appropriate venue. Thankfully, our bazaar does not call for much in the way of preparation, at least compared to a play or a cafe. We're decorating tables and helping students with marketable skills make their products. The classroom has been filled with creative activities ranging from sewing to painting.

Because my service does not require prep work, I'm often enlisted as a class-wide helper, along with Taichi-san and Jyou-san. It's been tiring, but there is a certain satisfaction to being useful to my peers. There aren't many events that cause my classmates to approach me and engage me so freely, and because there's a concrete topic at hand, I can manage the conversations easily. It's difficult, rewarding, and exhausting.

I suppose my primary charge is recording and interpreting the data Taichi-san gathers from other students regarding popular items, common clothing sizes, and favorite baked treats. It's a relief to work with information instead of trying to perform in an artistic capacity.

My mother seems to be very excited about the festival. It's open for general admission, so both of my parents will visit. I admit that I'm a bit nervous. I hope what they find meets their expectations. I don't want to disappoint. They will probably want to meet all of my friends and as many of my club mates as possible. I hope that I'm able to fill such a gregarious role long enough to assure my parents that I have an adequate social network. I'm aware that this has always been a concern for them.

My booth is open throughout the day, so my parents are timing their visit around Eimi-san's performance on Sunday afternoon. Mom seemed concerned about the fact that her parents can't attend. I hadn't considered that. It's so easy to take the presence of your parents for granted… That realization is remarkably uncomfortable. Shouldn't I be especially aware of that fact?

I shouldn't be surprised by my mother's kindness, since it's part of her character, but it always impresses me. She's only seen Eimi-san a few times, but she's worried about her, and she's taken so much time to speak to her and teach her how to cook and bake. Does she enjoy teaching those skills? Perhaps I should indicate interest in the culinary arts, but I must admit that I have none. Eimi-san, however, seemed thrilled to learn. It's a strange feeling, watching two people you know bond as a result of a connection to you. It evokes something akin to pride, although the merit is all theirs.

Eimi-san seems more herself lately, but she's oddly absent minded. It seems she's absorbed in writing lyrics, which is something I could never hope to accomplish. While I sympathize with her struggle, I admit that there's a comfort to her focus. If I require a quiet moment in the bustle of festival preparations, I can always sit beside her and read or program. I'm in good company, but free from the expectation of conversation.

My mother is calling me, so that's all for this time.

**15/10/28**

**Wednesday**

**Takenouchi Sora**

Everyone is working so hard for the Culture Festival! I didn't expect this, but Taichi-kun's leadership from Sports Day is leaking over into the preparations for the festival, too. He isn't nearly as focused or driven about it, but he's still going from person to person and encouraging everyone. Honestly, it's a better balance, with all of his charisma and caring without the intensity and pressure.

I can't believe how much buzz is building up around The Teenage Wolves. So many of our classmates signed out during their performance slot that we decided to close up the shop for half an hour so that everyone could watch Yamato, Eimi-chan, and the others. So when Yamato mentioned that he wished he had a product to sell to boost our classroom funds, I joked that if his group had a CD, it would fly off the shelves.

I wasn't prepared for his eyes to spark the way they did. I swear I could see it, a thrum of electricity passing across a blue backdrop like lightning. Or is that something I felt and imagined?

I knew he was taken with the idea, so I reminded him that the festival is next weekend. There's no time to record and produce a CD. It was sad to watch his excitement drain, and I wish I had thought of it much earlier.

But then he nodded and said, "Realistically, we need more practice before we record. But it's a great idea. I wonder how you go about doing that?"

I have no idea. Oh dear, I wonder if I just sent someone else to Koushiro-kun for technical help...!

I'm sure it would take a long time, but I hope he does make a CD someday. I would love to have it.

Taichi-kun was practically vibrating while we were working on the festival today, staring out the classroom windows at the field. I sent him around the building to collect ideas for snacks and clothes. We want to know what to bake the most of, and what the most common dress sizes are for girls in our school. I've been sewing constantly in the home ec lab and at home, trying to complete pieces in time to sell at the show. Some of my classmates are working with me, and I somehow ended up in charge of the group. I hope Mimi-chan doesn't mind that I've had less time for baking...

Mimi-chan is so excited about the festival. She's so vibrant, it's fun to watch her enjoy herself. She really has a green thumb, and she's been bringing in more and more plants for sale. It's been entertaining watching Jyou-kun try to construct a display for her. Luckily, some of our classmates have been helping him out. I'm not sure if he ever touched a hammer before this.

My mother is attending the festival. It makes me a little nervous... I want to impress her, but I also don't want that desire to be too obvious. The atmosphere at home has lightened since I talked to my mother about my interest in design, but she's a realistic woman. She knows that succeeding in the fashion industry is a lofty goal. I'm nervous... What if no one buys my clothes? What if I price them too high or too low? Mimi-chan keeps trying to talk my prices up, saying that hand made items demand higher prices, but I want the students to be able to afford them. And I'm also afraid that no one will buy anything if the cost is too high...

I wonder if mom will watch The Teenage Wolves with me? I wonder if she'll like them? Should I introduce her to Yamato? That's probably too much, isn't it. What if I introduce all of my friends to her? Will she be able to read a difference in how I treat various people?

I want my mother to know all of my friends, but... It's Yamato I really want her to approve of. That's... I know there's meaning there.

Well, regardless... It's been hectic, but it's so nice to watch everyone work as a team. I can't wait to see what we do together.

**October 29, 2015**

**Thursday**

**Anami Eimi**

Dear Kitty,

I think there's something wrong with me. Why now?! There's so much going on at school! I'm supposed to perform my very own song at the Culture Festival, and it's next weekend, and I'm still working on the lyrics, and I think Yama is ready to shove my head through my guitar.

I tried to ask Jyou-kun if he thought I was alright, but that was a mistake. He dragged me to his father, who is a doctor. I was so embarrassed, but Jyou-kun is so insistent about health stuff, he didn't give me much of a choice. I told Kido-sensei how I've been feeling: spacey, difficulty focusing, fatigue, nerves, palpitations. He gave me a quick, informal exam and attributed it to stress. He's probably right; I'm worked up about writing a song and performing, and I was already worn down by Taichi-kun's training for Sports Day. He asked Jyou-kun to teach me the meditation routine he uses, and recommended that I try to do something fun.

That's why last Sunday's typical study session was replaced with hanging out at Koushiro-kun's apartment. Jyou-kun taught me how to meditate while Koushiro-kun programmed. It was hard; I was supposed to be listening to the music and focusing on breathing, but I kept zeroing in on Koushiro-kun's keyboard clacking and the mouse clicking. I guess I'm distractable, huh…

After that, Koushiro-kun's mother offered to teach me how to bake strawberry short cake. I felt so happy when she said that. I almost laughed, isn't that weird? Well, I followed Izumi-san out of Koushiro-kun's bedroom, and at first I thought it was kind of odd that I was alone with Izumi-san without her son around, but she's so warm that I didn't feel awkward.

What _is_ it about Koushiro-kun's mom? It's so easy to talk to her. She asked questions, and I found myself completely spilling, even though I hardly know her. Without even realizing it, I was talking about how Mimi-chan and Sora-chan keep giving the boys these amazing sweets, and I can't make anything, and Koushiro-kun keeps saying how good they are, and I feel so left out. And Sora-chan and Mimi-chan are going to fill stands at the bazaar with hand made clothes and sweets and plants, and I can't do anything, and I almost started tearing up talking about it. But I wasn't even embarrassed, because Izumi-san has the gentlest eyes, and she smiled at me and said, "Well, now you'll be able to make strawberry short cake. It's Koushiro's favorite."

So I took notes, and we baked and chatted, and it was so much fun! Izumi-san is so interested in my school life. I wonder if even she has trouble talking to Koushiro-kun sometimes? I'm pretty sure she was mining me for information about his life at school. I don't mind, except that I'm an idiot, and I started talking about how cool Koushiro-kun was when he gave a lecture for his club- something that I wasn't supposed to know about!

Smooth, Eimi. You are silk. You are a vat of melted chocolate. You're an _idiot_. Maybe I'll get lucky and she won't mention it to Koushiro-kun... She didn't ask how I knew about it. Maybe it sounded normal?

Well... Anyway, Izumi-san had me serve the cake to the boys, and they said it was good! I couldn't believe it when Koushiro-kun took a second piece. I was probably smiling too much. You know how you can feel your cheeks start to stretch? But I'm so glad I can do it, too, just like Mimi-chan and Sora-chan. Maybe I can still learn everything I need to know to take care of a home and myself, just like them.

I wish Izumi-san could be my mom. She's so kind. I wonder if Sora-chan will grow up to be like her, all nice and nurturing? I want to be like that, too, but I don't know if I have it in me...

So I feel a little better now, except that I don't, because my song lyrics are a mess. Aki and I wrote a melody for my voice together, just singing the song on vowel sounds. Hiro wrote a guitar part for me, and the boys filled in the other instruments. They put together this ballad that rises and falls, rises and falls, bursts into a final swell, and spirals down to nothing. I'm so flattered and shocked that they made such a complex, beautiful piece for me. I teared up when we played it the first time, and they teased me so much. Ugh, they're so great! I don't even know what to do. How can I repay them?

Well... They left the lyrics up to me. At first, I just ran the melody through my head and wrote, sort of a stream of consciousness. It didn't rhyme, and it didn't always fit the beat, but it was just a base.

But when I finished, there... There was no way around it. I was working on a love song. And I was all, "Really, brain? What do you know about love?" But... it's kind of weird. You know how a lot of love songs are about how attractive and great the loved one is, or how much the singer needs them? My song is... I think it's about... adoration? It kind of circles around the point in the verses, but clarifies in the chorus. Build, swell, break.

I wanted to trash the whole thing and start over. Just reading it made me freak out. What do I know about that stuff?! I'm going to sound like a starry-eyed child, with more feelings than brains and experience. But even as I told myself I would write something new, I found myself tweaking it, adding and subtracting in my head while I walk to school, during English class, and during club meetings.

And that is why I'm never going to finish my lyrics, and Yama is going to kill me. The festival is next weekend! Everyone is going to hear me sing it! So many people in my class wanted to hear The Teenage Wolves perform both days that our bazaar is closing for the sets. All of my classmates will hear my song! What am I going to do?

Oh boy. I'd better try that meditation again.

Yours,

Eimi

PS: I'm a little sad to miss out on Halloween in the states while I'm in Japan. They do have it in here, but it's… There's no trick-or-treating. It's more like an adult holiday? Like, a time when you can drink and dress up? But I'm too busy to look into it, and the kids at school aren't talking about it too much… It's too bad. I really love Halloween.

**15/10/30**

**Friday**

**Ishida Yamato**

It isn't like me to be nervous. I can't say I like it.

Somehow, performing in front of the school is more nerve-wracking than performing in the contest over the summer. If everything goes to hell somehow, I still have to look at those kids almost every day for the next three years. Plus, my dad is somehow making time to come, and of course I invited Takeru. He texted me today and said that mom is coming with him.

I don't even know how I feel about that. It's all too... complex. I get that she's trying to support me, and I guess that's good. But where has that support been for the last... God, how long has it been? Almost ten years?

I don't see my mother very often. When my parents split up, they asked me who should live where. I still can't believe they did that. I was so young, and they dropped that burden on my shoulders just so they wouldn't have to carry the responsibility. I thought I understood what my choices would mean, but I didn't stand a chance of fully appreciating the implications.

Both of my parents work all of the time. They always have. I learned how to cook and clean early on. My mother can keep house, and she's more emotionally available as a parent. I knew Takeru had to stay with her for his own good.

I could have stayed with mom, too. I wanted to. But it didn't seem fair, leaving my father all alone, and I knew he can't take care of himself. So I went with him.

What I didn't know was that I'd spend years seeing Takeru once or twice a year, and that my mother would completely drop out of my life.

Recently, Takeru and I have grown old enough to meet up on our own, so I see him fairly often. Naturally, I run into my mother more as well. It's always so stiff; I'm angry, and she's... I guess I don't know what she's thinking. She could regret it. She could feel guilty. But even if she does, it doesn't change the situation.

So what is she doing, showing up at the Culture Festival now? I went through years of Parent Days where no one came. There were Sports Days and Culture Festivals in the past. Why now? Did Takeru talk her into it? He_ is_ becoming persuasive. It's scary as hell.

Forget it. I don't know what to think. I know there's no use mulling over it, but stopping is easier said than done.

Anyway, Sora suggested that we make a CD to sell at the Culture Festival. There's no time this year, but the thought of having a CD is pretty exciting. I'm probably getting ahead of myself; we don't even know how popular we'll be with the student body yet, let alone the world beyond it. And how much does it cost to have a CD produced? Probably a lot.

But the thought of holding our CD in my hands is mind-blowing. Sora said she would be our first customer. I wonder if she would play it at home? I can't decide if that's exciting or embarrassing. Strange how close together those two can be.

I want to introduce my dad and Takeru to Sora and my band mates. I know Takeru likes Sora, but my dad didn't get much of an impression from the beach trip; there were too many of us. Actually, he knows a lot more about Eimi, since she worked with him over the summer.

But I'm not worried. Who wouldn't like Sora? Again, I might be getting ahead of myself, but I think I'm alright.

But I won't be if Eimi doesn't finish her song lyrics soon. Actually, I'm worried something is wrong with her, and that we might have to swap out her song for a different one. Sometimes when I look at her, especially when she's writing, there's so much conflict in her eyes. I know that look; it's been on my face too many times to mistake it.

I wonder what's going on in her head? I can tell there's a problem, but I don't really know what to do about it. The song seems to be about love, or at least about devotion to someone. I don't know much about her life outside of school, but inside of it, her network is pretty small. Actually, it's similar to mine in size.

I'm tempted to think that she's writing about Koushiro, but... How do I say this? Could someone really write a love song about him? He's a decent guy, but... She spends a lot of time around him, and they usually just... kind of sit there. Well, it takes all sorts, I guess...

I tried to talk to her about it, but she was too stressed about finishing the lyrics to really hear what I was saying. That's not good; it's hard to channel anything creative like that. I told her to take a break from writing and go sing with Aki. Hopefully his chill will rub off on her.

Man, I feel like I'm paddling against the current in a river of worries. I'd better go chill myself before I turn into Jyou.

**15/10/31**

**Saturday**

**Yagami Taichi**

I feel a little more like myself ever since Sports Day. I finally pulled my shit together and presented my ideas to the Captain and our coach. Our training for the fall tournament starts as soon as the Culture Festival ends, and there isn't much time, but it's something, right?

I tried to be all confident about it, but I kinda wished that I had Koushiro with me. His collected expression is pretty reassuring, at least when it's on your side. Plus, if I messed up the details, he could have been all like, "Excuse me, Taichi-san, but..."

Anyway, we put a lot of thought and work into it, so I would have been pissed if coach and Cap blew me off! But I was kind of surprised. At first they were skeptical, but the more I talked, the more they got into it. They said it was good, and that they're going to use my ideas. I mean, I knew they were good, because Koushiro and I spent all that time reading shit and watching games and looking at player data. But people usually don't like my plans, which usually come down to "CHARGE!" It was cool to be taken seriously like that.

But for now, I can't do any more until the festival ends. I'm trying to focus on it, and I know people are tired of my soccer brain. But it's so hard to see the field sitting there empty and to sit around in the classroom after school when I'd usually be out there. Luckily, I can help Sora out. She usually asks me to go talk to people for information. I never really knew how important info is before, but suddenly I'm using it all over the place.

I'd rather be at practice, but it is fun to go talk to new people in other classes and grades. And Sora always smiles and thanks me when I come back with questionnaires filled out. I wonder if that's why dudes will work for their families? Because of how it feels when their wife smiles at them? Not that Sora and I- Forget it.

I wonder what else I can do to help? Hikari said she wants to go, and my mom is coming, too. I want our bazaar to be interesting for them. Maybe Sora will have some ideas for what I can do?

**15/11/01**

**Sunday**

**Tachikawa Mimi**

Dear Diary,

The Culture Festival is the best! I've been baking and bringing my plants in to school. Mariko-chan had the idea to hand paint the pots for my plants, so I've been helping with design ideas, and Sora-chan helps when she can. Eimi-chan is singing and playing guitar for our bazaar, so she doesn't have much prep work. I roped her into painting the pots. At first she said she couldn't do it, but now she's squished between the other girls doing a great job. See? All she needs is a little… _encouragement_.

Anyway, I am so in love with Sora-chan right now (but aren't I always?). Taichi-kun and Yamato-kun keep running to her like puppies with wagging tails, asking her what they should do. And she always thinks of some chore to keep them busy. It's _delicious_. Now that's power! Plus, she has a group of girls helping her sew, which is awesome, because her clothes are going to draw so much attention to our classroom. That girl is on fire!

As for me, I have my painting group, plus Jyou-kun carries new plants to school for me from my apartment. He and some other boys are building display stands for the things we want to sell. There's baked goods, plants, and clothes, but also paintings, sculptures, stuffed toys, framed photographs, pottery… Our class is so talented! Everything is so colorful and fun!

Haha, I wonder if Sora-chan realizes that she keeps talking about The Teenage Wolves and their performance? She keeps asking Eimi-chan about her lyrics, and the poor puppy keeps turning pink as a tutu. I checked them out when Eimi-chan wasn't looking, and oh, God. Oh, sweetie. I had to focus in because these definitely aren't pop lyrics. It's hilarious, because it's just like talking to her; she dances around the point. But if she thinks she's fooling anyone, she's kidding herself!

It's about being so super into someone, but not in that "you're hot and I wanna piece" kind of way. It's more like… "You're amazing, and I don't even know what to do, but you already have all of me," and I was getting all wibbly reading it. Seriously! You'd never guess that she's thinking stuff like that. I mean, I knew she was crushing on Koushiro-kun, but this? Does _she_ even know?! I don't think she does!

I asked Sora-chan if I should talk to her about it. She said I should wait until after the Culture Festival, so that she doesn't flip out when she's supposed to be performing. Man, I'm glad she's my best girl. I wouldn't even have thought of that.

God, everything is so fun right now! I feel like dancing! I'm gonna call some friends and gossip about everything!

XOXOXO,

Mimi

**Culture Notes:**

**Kido-sensei:** Teachers are addressed as sensei, but so are professionals, such as doctors, and people who are in charge of something, such as the head of a dojo.

**Halloween in Japan:** I'm hearing all kinds of different things online, but apparently Halloween is a time for drinking, partying, and dressing up in Japan. So, you know, not too different from what we have in the states, except that the elements for children seem to be absent, and the celebration is not nearly as wide spread. It seems to be limited to young adults in cities.

**Soccer tournaments:** I know nothing about soccer and the timing of tournaments and so on. Sorry! Just run with it, okay? XD

**Author's Notes:** So, I'm working on Nanowrimo. I'm trying to complete _The Ouija Board_, but it's been difficult, and I want to keep updating _Voices_, especially since the Culture Festival is interesting. Hopefully no one minds me stepping back in time a little to make sure that there's time to introduce the festival properly. It would actually be occurring this weekend (today and tomorrow), so I will try to update this story again next week before I leave for vacation to talk about that.

I'm writing so much these days for Nanowrimo, so I would appreciate some love more than ever ;) If you're enjoying the story, please let me know! Thank you :D


	16. November 2

**Voices**

November 2: 9th-15th

**15/11/09**

**Monday**

**Ishida Yamato**

Man, they should have given us today off. I'm exhausted.

The Culture Festival was amazing. I didn't expect our bazaar to be any more successful than the next classroom's exhibit, but our room was packed both days. It seemed like the stage area for Eimi and me was always surrounded by girls. Mimi-chan's suggestion of a tip jar worked out, too. Tipping generally isn't done in Japan, but she said musicians perform on streets for money in the states; "busking," apparently. Eimi verified, and Mimi-chan smacked a jar down. Eimi and I pulled in almost forty thousand yen. Guess I should have put a jar in front of the stage when we performed.

It was hard to see through the crowd, but everyone was working hard. Sora sold all of her clothes before noon on the second day, so she spent the rest of the time working with Mimi-chan. Mimi-chan is like a hurricane, by the way. I could hear her sweet talking customers and drawing attention to the booths.

Being on the spot like that all day was really tiring. Eimi and I took a few breaks, and we were careful to keep our voices intact for our performance, but playing for hours takes a toll mentally. Maybe it's because I'm introverted? But you're not exactly yourself when you perform. There's a bit of an act there, presenting a personality that will draw in the audience. By the end of the day, I felt like lying in bed and just staring at the ceiling.

As for our performance... I wish we could do that more often. Our school has a nice auditorium, with a decent sized stage and plenty of seating. We filled every seat both days, and people were standing in the back. The turn out was crazy; why were there so many kids from other schools there?

There was so much energy in the room. It felt so different from our last performance, where no one knew us. This time, it was like the auditorium was filled with our personal fans. I don't understand how the audience was so in our favor, since we've never performed at school before, but I appreciated it. The others would probably deny it, but I think we all enjoyed walking onstage to all of that cheering.

So we all stood by our instruments, and their voices hit us like a wave. The force of it was ridiculous, and I stood at the mic in shock for a few seconds. I could see the first few rows in the stage lights, all of these screaming girls.

And before I knew it, I was smirking and introducing us, and Naoki counted us in, and we were _on_. Their energy hit us like alcohol on a fire, and everything exploded. It was just a three song set, but we were sweating buckets by the end of it from the heat and the effort. The audience wanted an encore, but the schedule is packed, so we cleared out.

That was Saturday's performance, when Dad was there. Takeru and my mother came on Sunday. I hate to say this, but I was more nervous about them hearing my band than I was about the rest of the crowd combined. Luckily, they weren't in the first few rows, so I couldn't see them.

Again, we had a great crowd, and I think we played our absolute best so far that day. I tried to focus on performing rather than thinking about my family and wondering if Eimi would be alright.

She had me worried. She didn't have time to re-write her lyrics. I told her that it's better to stick with what she really wanted to say, anyway. She turned red and looked down at her sheet music. She was kind of a nervous wreck, but I think only some of it was related to the actual performance. Maybe I'm projecting? But she seemed more or less alright with the idea of getting onstage and singing.

Poor kid should have known better than to put her heart on paper. Anyone can see it there.

I was worried about her pulling off the emotional complexity of the piece, even though she wrote the lyrics. She's, what, sixteen? And her practice performances sounded fine in the technical sense, but they were sheepish. She set the bar too high and was falling short.

I have to hand it to her, though. She walked up to that microphone, introduced herself as our manager, and she killed it. I'm not joking- I saw a few people tearing up, and of course Aki is such a damned teddy bear, he was choking up. For three minutes and some change, she wasn't Eimi at all; she was the longing inside all of us to love and be loved, and I'll be honest, it got a little raw.

I wasn't the only one who thought so, judging by the beats of silence that passed between the last note of the song and the first cheer.

I probably should have checked in with her, but Takeru met us at the door to the backstage area, and Mom was with him, and... Even though I'm seeing her more often these days, she looks older than I remember.

Is that how things are always going to be? Whenever I meet Mom or Takeru, will there always be a moment when I feel the discrepancies between what my memory pictures and what I see?

She was tearing up, and I was about to say something about Eimi's song when she hugged me and said that she was proud of me.

I tensed, and I almost wanted to challenge her, but... Damn it. It's just that she hasn't touched me since I left with Dad. I guess something in us always responds to our mother. I didn't say anything, but I hugged her back.

She talked about how much she liked the band, and how tall I am now, and I tried to engage her. But like always, those familiar questions clogged my brain. _Why haven't I seen you for so long? What have you been doing? Do you regret what happened? Why did I have to spend so much time alone?_

Thank God for Sora. If she hadn't showed up, I might actually have started asking those questions, right in front of the backstage entrance. Where did she even come from? Did Takeru bring her?

Before I knew what was happening, Takeru was leading us to the far corner of the hallway, away from the doors and the foot traffic. I realized that Sora was with a pretty woman with a reserved expression. It was like a kick in the gut when I realized that I was dealing with _two_ mothers. (How did I go from zero to two so quickly?!)

I know from Sora that her mother is traditional and serious, so I wanted to make a good impression. I introduced my family and tried to be courteous, but I'm worried that I wasn't my best. My mind was swirling after the performance and seeing Mom.

Takenouchi-san said very little, and she moved on pretty quickly. I guess she wanted to meet all of Sora's friends, but I wish I could have had more time with her and Sora. I have no idea what she thought of me.

Then I was alone with my family again, and I tried to act like everything was normal. I introduced them to my band mates, then gave them a tour of the school and my classroom. Mom bought one of Mimi-chan's plants, and Takeru bought sweets.

I had singing duty again, so they hung around for a while, and then we went to dinner. Mostly Mom and I listened to Takeru chatter. He looked so damned happy, and he even mentioned that he wished Dad were here.

Does some tiny part of him think that we'll all be together again? I hope not, for his sake. It's not going to happen. I wish I had his optimism, though. How does he keep smiling when the mood is so tense?

Mom asked me to let her know when I perform again. She said she loved us, but I always wonder if moms feel like they have to say that. Takeru said, "We don't have to wait for another concert to get together." I heard myself suck in a breath.

Mom hesitated, then said that was true. And now we have plans for another dinner a month from now.

I'm too drained to sit here and read into this. I'm going to bed.

**15.11.10**

**Tuesday**

**Kido Jyou**

Ugh. I'm so tired, I feel like I could fall asleep at my desk. Have I ever felt this worn out before?

I've been running around like a crazy person, trying to do whatever needed doing for the festival. I shouldn't complain; I can't make anything, so running errands was the least I could do.

I also went to prep school as much as possible. I'm beat. It seems like everyone had a good time, but I'm glad things are back to normal.

You know, I've definitely had years when it felt like I was the only one doing any work for these events. And yes, some people worked harder than others, but our class really worked together for this, and I think that's why it was such a success. It's kind of funny that Taichi-kun gets so little done personally when he's going around talking to everyone else, but it really does help keep everyone cheerful and motivated.

Mimi-chan is the ultimate salesperson. Sometimes I'm a little frightened by how much influence she can hold over strangers. Just a smile and a few kind words, and people were pulling their wallets out. She's so dangerous...

My mother met my friends on Sunday. She seemed to especially like Eimi-chan, whose singing she admired (she also knows her already from study sessions). She made a request for an American standard, and randomly, Eimi-chan knew it. Mom got a kick out of that. She also seems to dote on Koushiro-kun a bit… I wonder if it's because he's quiet and focused, like her sons?

Mimi-chan hasn't been to my place as much, since she isn't so interested in studying. This was probably delusional of me, but I made sure my mother met her. They talked for a while about music and plants, and when we met up for dinner with my father, she talked about her a lot. I believe the words "beautiful" and "charming" were spoken, which isn't a surprise, I guess.

But I _was_ surprised by how well Koushiro-kun's computer repair service went. He worked on laptops all day. I imagine it was all fairly boring stuff for him, probably virus and malware removal for the most part. I checked in on him when I could, just to make sure he wasn't overwhelmed socially. But he does so much better when there's a task in front of him, especially if it's in his skill set. He was chatting away about the computers and explaining the problems like it was nothing. You'd never know he has any social clumsiness if you saw him then. I wonder if there's a way to channel that focus in daily life... Maybe there's some kind of psychology thing my dad or brothers know about that could help?

Yamato's band really did well. They must have worked hard. I wonder sometimes why people put so much effort into things outside of school, since your grades are basically passports to your future. But I guess if you could succeed as a musician, you don't need a degree. I can't imagine a life without more school at this point…

I think I related a little too much to Eimi-chan's song. Honestly, it was a little hard to listen to. It was like she was... how do I say this? Sort of unzipping herself and showing the insides, but in a figurative way. Her thoughts and feelings. Coming from someone who can dance around a straight-forward question, it was kind of jarring. But I guess that's what the arts are for, right? Expression?

I wonder what Koushiro-kun thought of her song. She had to be talking about him, right? Maybe that's presumptuous, but I can't imagine what else she'd be thinking of. Is it possible to write something like that, and perform it like she did, without experiencing it first?

I wonder if that's how I feel... I don't think I have the confusion that Eimi-chan seems to feel, but the rests of it felt familiar. Just what I need, someone mashing on my sore spots...

Sorry, it's not like it's her fault. It's just hard to not feel down about things sometimes, even without that kind of reminder.

Anyway, classes are back on, and it's business as usual, so I should study.

**15/11/11**

**Wednesday**

**Yagami Taichi**

The Culture Festival was cool and all, but I am _so_ ready for practices. It feels great to be on the field again. And it's pretty cool watch Coach tell everyone about my plan and put it into effect. I've been working really hard at practice, and trying to get training in on my own, too. Hikari keeps telling me to take it easier, but I can't slack off. That defeat hurt too much. We're _going_ to do better this time.

I had a good time at the festival. It was really annoying how all of the girls flocked around Yamato, though. So when Mimi-chan told me to move along people who were taking up space and not buying stuff, I was like, "I'm your guy!"

Sora was so amazing, though. Designing clothes must be hard enough, but making them, too? Dude, the most creative I can get is making an omelet. They taste good, but they look kinda messy. Whatever, Hikari likes them.

Anyway, her clothes sold out, and people were so interested in them. I heard Koushiro say something about making a store website for her. I wish I could help her out somehow, too, but how?

Even though they shut down our bazaar both days so we could watch Yamato's band, I didn't go on Saturday. But Sora told me that Eimi was singing on Sunday, and it was one of those tones where I knew I had better listen to what she said, so… I went. I hate to say this, but the band actually is pretty good. I could do with less screeching from the girls, though. Sora really seemed into it…

Eimi's song sounded really nice, but it was some heavy stuff, man. I knew this all along, but she thinks too damned much. The lyrics were kind of layered and complicated. Part of me thought, "Man, if you want something or someone, just go get it, right?" But when I thought about it more… It's not always that easy, I guess. I think she should go do something fun to take her mind off of things. Maybe I could organize another group thing? I think Mimi-chan mentioned a party once or twice.

Mom and Hikari seemed to have a good time. Mom really liked Sora and Mimi-chan, I think. She bought a few plants, and I probably shouldn't tell Mimi-chan that Mom tends to over water things. Maybe I'll tell Hikari to take care of them. Speaking of, she was with Yamato's brother a lot… Maybe I should keep an eye on that? I mean, I guess he seems nice enough, but I asked around, and some of the girls said that he has lots of female friends.

And oh god, don't get me started on my teammates. They're all like, "Oh, is your sister coming? Your sister had better come!" Like I can control that! What are they _thinking_? She's too young for them!

Okay, look. Hikari's got her shit together more than I ever will. She can handle herself. I get it. But if anyone breaks her heart, so help me… I'll break a few of _their_ organs.

Speaking of my teammates, though, I organized some time for extra drills. Gotta go- I'm supposed to be leading them!

**November 12, 2015**

**Thursday**

**Anami Eimi**

Dear Kitty,

I've been having a really, _really_ weird week.

First, the Culture Festival, I suppose. I thought singing and playing guitar in the classroom would be fun, but I didn't realize it would be so crowded! That was stupid of me; of course the girls wanted to see Yama. They literally hung around, getting coffees and sweets and watching him perform. And I felt myself shrinking more and more, because I could feel this... antagonism raining down on me. I know it sounds crazy, but I could sense it.

Yama and I were side-by-side most of the day on our tiny platform, playing our guitars and singing, sometimes together, sometimes taking turns. You could feel the mood shift when Yama sang and when I had a song. His performance was welcome and valued. Mine was not.

Part of me understands... I know I've said that Yama is handsome, but I don't know if I can really impress on you just how good looking he is. You know how movie stars are like the top 0.5% of the population in terms of attractiveness? I think he's way more attractive than most of them, or at least in the same league. It might be partially because I know him in real life, and he has presence that the celebrities will never have for me. Take it with a grain of salt, but all I can tell you is what I think.

So yeah, add his talent, intelligence, and the 'cool-type' persona he cultivates to his looks. _Bam_. Now put me right beside him. Not so bam.

I can totally deal with being the supporting attraction, but what was with the dislike I seemed to read from the crowd? Am I being too sensitive? I mean, this can't be like the situation with Mimi-chan. Society has this construct called "leagues," and I am _not_ in Yamato's. So there's no way people would think that we're together. Geez, I can't even imagine that!

But… I wonder what it's like to be in love with someone. There's supposed to be, like... Feelings? Attraction? Fireworks? That's what they say, anyway. I've never felt that before at all. I mean, I can tell when someone has physical beauty. I can tell when I like one person more than another. But I've never looked in someone's eyes and gone all fluttery and struck by lightening or whatever.

I want to assume that those feelings are just exaggerated in songs and movies, but why is that exaggeration so universal? It makes me think that there must be something to it. I mean, they say all of Greek and Roman mythology is The Various Instances in which Zeus/Jupiter Could Not Keep It in His Divine Loincloth, and the Resulting Hijinks. This isn't a new thing.

I'm really too young to worry about love and lust anyway. I need to get back to the Culture Festival.

I brought a homemade strawberry shortcake, and I saw Koushiro-kun buy a piece when he took a break. His booth seemed to do well. I wish I could have talked to him more, but I was so busy! I hope he was okay talking to that many people, but he should be fine if it's something technical.

I met some of my friends' family members. I admit that I was really jealous when I met Mimi-chan's parents. They love her so much, it's so obvious. What makes one person more loved than another?

Geez... I keep getting sidetracked. Um, I saw Yama's younger brother again. Takeru-kun is soooooo cute, oh my gosh, he was dressed like a hipster! He's all scrawny with blond hair, and I swear to you, he was wearing skinny jeans, a button down shirt, a vest, a scarf, and a hat. Not a cap, like a legitimate hat. A fedora, maybe? And he was side-by-side with Hikari-chan, Taichi-kun's younger sister. They were apparently doing a report on the Culture Festival together, with him writing and her taking photos.

(But every school has a Culture Festival, which leads me to believe that they were just looking for an excuse to take our pictures and interview us. I see what you're doing, children.)

I wonder if those two are dating? That would be so hilarious, since their brothers are all tense around one another. They're kind of young, though, so maybe not?

My boys did _such_ a great job performing, and Yama is something else when he's onstage. When he smirks with the stage lights gleaming in his hair, and the music is swelling all around him, from him... Yikes. I wonder if my other boys get jealous? Everyone was amazing, but Yama's definitely the star of the show.

I bet they all have their fans, though. Hiro is so talented, shredding on the guitar like he was born with one in his little baby hands. Aki's dreamy expression is so soothing, and he somehow gives his keyboard the most emotive voice. As for Naoki, he's got enough energy to support the whole band, and you're not likely to miss him.

I watched them from the side of the stage, and they really gave it their all. They were so sweaty when they finished, but they smiled so hard, and they were kind of... dazed? Delirious? It was probably a lot to take in.

I was so happy for them, but I knew that I'd have my own performance on Sunday. I had to use my love lyrics, because I honestly couldn't do anything else. For better or for worse, I realized that I was looking at my song, and it just wouldn't work any other way. And trust me, I tried.

But it made me so nervous... I had this weird feeling that the lyrics were like diary pages, but I HAVE a diary, and it's not like it's filled with gushing about how I'm in love with someone. I love my boys, my friends, and my grandma. I look up to Sora-chan because of her maturity and warmth. I want to be universally caring, like Jyou-kun. Koushiro-kun is the smartest person I've ever met, and I admire how hard he's been trying to open up more. I could go on; I love them all.

So... Why did this feel so personal and private? And why couldn't I just change the lyrics? Why am I so stuck on it when I've never even had a crush on someone before? I haven't experienced it. It shouldn't matter. It's just words.

Sunday came, and I watched my boys play in the wings again. My hands turned into icicles, and my face was so flushed, and I trembled. Almost vibrated, really. I've performed before as a soloist, and I get nervous, sure. But this was something different.

Then Yamato turned to me and grinned, and Naoki gestured with his drumsticks, "_Come, come_," and so I went. My ears were ringing, and if the crowd was still cheering, I couldn't hear it. The stage lights were like little suns, and it burned onstage. When I took Yamato's spot center stage, I could smell his cologne and his sweat lingering there. I could see the first few rows of the crowd, and they were probably other students, but my brain couldn't process their faces. Everything else was darkness.

When you get onstage, you're supposed to exude energy, unless you have some kind of persona that relies on other methods of drawing the crowd in (for example, Yama's "cool dude" thing). I should have been peppy, but... I don't even know what happened. I stared into the darkness and just... Just talked. My brain wasn't in control at all; it was totally fried.

I must have said roughly the right thing, because Naoki counted us in. Thank God for music; the familiar melody carried me when I could barely keep myself upright. And the song builds so gradually, I was able to grow with it. And everything was the white hot light in my eyes and the music in my ears, and I sang.

How do I describe what it's like to sing for an audience? There's nothing to compare it to. Your diaphragm expands and contracts, fueling your lungs, and the air seems to rush upward. Your voice spills out, and everything it touches tingles and sparks, so your throat and chest are all alight with sensation. Meanwhile, your heart is pounding and your blood is rushing and it's earnest, pure, potent.

And then it was over, and there was a silence, and it sounded so shattering after all of the cheering and the music. Then I heard a shrieking cheer (definitely Mimi-chan), and then everyone was clapping and standing up, and we all bowed, and then the curtains closed so the stage hands could prep for the next set.

I was frozen, just blinking at the curtain, when Hiro smacked me on the back. They all said I did a good job, but I couldn't even tell you if I sang in the right language.

When we went back to the classroom, Koushiro-kun was at his booth with his parents. They called me over and were so kind. I knew Koushiro-kun was in the audience, but I didn't know his parents would be there. I can't believe they took the time to hear me sing… How can they be so nice? I don't understand. Koushiro-kun could have taken them through a tour of the school during that time instead. I mean, my own parents didn't usually go to things like that.

Koushiro-kun said I was amazing, and I didn't know how to act. Luckily, Mimi-chan chose that _exact_ moment to bodily tackle hug me from behind. Unluckily, this pitched me into Koushiro-kun, who crashed against his table, turning us into a teenager pile riiiight in front of his parents. Oi, Mimi-chan…

But do you think he really meant it? I mean, I don't think he'd lie, but… Amazing? From Koushiro-kun? He's probably the most talented person I know, so that's… Wow.

My friends were so complimentary. It felt really good, but I hope they were being honest. I guess I won't know for myself until the AV club releases the recordings.

I feel so tired… I'm going to sleep.

Yours,

Eimi

**15/11/13**

**Friday**

**Takenouchi Sora**

The Culture Festival passed in a blur. We were so busy showing items to customers and answering questions. I couldn't believe it, but my clothes sold out! And some of my classmates asked if I would be willing to make clothes for them by commission. I'm a little overwhelmed!

When I brought it up to my friends, Koushiro-kun mentioned that I could sign up for a website that creates a storefront for my work. That way, I could handle payments through an online service like . He also offered to make me a site if I wanted one, which was so kind of him.

The classroom was packed all day, and although we offered nice wares, I think Yamato was the main draw. The crowd around our little stage platform was so big that Taichi had to kick out loiterers so the shoppers could fit in the room. Basically, people were allowed to stay as long as they were eating or drinking something they bought here. Mimi-chan kept working the crowd, trying to draw people away from the stage and towards the items for sale. It was quite a sight.

I felt a little intimidated by how many people Yamato drew in. I guess it's easy to forget how popular he is when you generally only see him in your classroom. I wonder what he thinks of it... I can tell he doesn't like it when girls have crushes on him but have never spoken to him. I've seen him throw away letters from his cube in the genkan without opening them. At first I thought that was harsh, but I've seen it happen enough that I'm starting to understand his feelings.

And when he performed... I really couldn't believe it. He looks so collected and assured onstage. He's usually so calm and quiet. If it weren't for his natural presence, I think you could miss him entirely, because he has a habit of hanging back and observing. But he's front and center onstage, and he sings and plays so well, and everyone was screaming and cheering for him, and heaven help me, I'm _such_ a fan girl now. I held out for as long as I could, I really did. I tried _so_ hard. But my heart was dancing the whole time, and I was cheering just as hard as Mimi-chan, and I felt so… It was so exciting! It's like I could feel energy flying up and down my nerves.

The Teenage Wolves have improved so much since their last performance; you can tell they've been working hard. The crowd really loved them. I'm so proud of Yamato, and I know the band means a lot to him. I'm happy for him. Maybe we can hang out to talk about the performance soon?

Of course, Mom was there on Sunday, so I had to reign myself in a bit more (the presence of parents did _not_ stop Mimi-chan from screaming). They played another three part set, but this time, Eimi-chan closed it out. Her song was… I already read the sheet music, but I hadn't heard it before, and… Wow. I thought it was very powerful. I'd say it was about loving someone, but that doesn't quite fit. It was more like adoring someone, being in awe of them, and not knowing what to do about it, how to express it, or even how to process it. All of these emotions tumbled together, excitement and joy, confusion and hesitance, sadness and fear.

I felt that song in every cell of my body. It almost made me tear up, but I knew I couldn't, since my mother was beside me. How would I explain that to her? And I had no idea that Eimi-chan could sing like that. Yamato told me she was a good singer, but I wasn't prepared for what I heard. Her voice is like a bell, clear and sweet, but she really knows how to convey the emotions she was singing about. I don't really know much about music, but I thought she was wonderful.

We stood and filed out of the auditorium when their set ended, but Takeru-kun slipped into the crowd and stopped me. I couldn't believe his outfit; he was wearing a fedora, a vest, and a scarf! It was a bit much, but oddly, it _did_ suit him. I think I heard my mother swallow a laugh beside me. I introduced them, and he took hold of my wrist and said, "Could you come with me? I could really use your help."

I had no idea what he had in mind, but I followed him. He led us backstage, and I saw Yamato's band mates passing by, some with family members. Yamato was in the far end of the hallway, standing there with a blond woman. His body language was tense.

When I moved closer, I knew that she was Yamato's mother. They have identical eyes, and she's so beautiful. I know that Yamato's relationship with his mother is strained, so I tried to be cheerful and warm to smooth things over. There were introductions all around, and I wanted to stay for a while, but my mother closed the conversation quickly and led us away.

I was a little upset at first, wondering if Yamato was offended. But after we left backstage, Mom smiled at me and said, "He's very handsome."

I don't know if I've ever twitched so hard. All I could do was stare at her. That smile widened, and she said, "I wouldn't have left so quickly, but it seemed like a family moment. Perhaps some other time?" And then she started talking about how good their set was, and I don't think I managed to string two words together the whole time.

I don't understand! How could she possibly- She hasn't met Yamato before, so how- Have I ever mentioned him at home? I suppose it's possible…

Is this what they mean by a mother's intuition? Wow…

Mom said she loved my clothes, and she bought a slice of my cake and a plant from Mimi-chan. I introduced her to my friends, and she seemed to like everyone. We went to dinner afterward, and it went more smoothly than I could have hoped.

But still, I'm so worn out… People can sure surprise you, even if you've known them your whole life!

**15/11/14**

**Saturday**

**Tachikawa Mimi**

Dear Diary,

Ahhh, this was such a fun weekend! Our classroom was jam packed with people the whole time. Our class made so much money, we'll be able to do something really cool for our class excursion this year.

Haha, you wouldn't believe the crowd that Yamato-kun and Eimi-chan drew in. There were so many people that I told Taichi-kun to move the loiterers along! We're trying to run a business here! Luckily, if Yamato-kun can draw people in with his music, I can draw them in with... Let's say 'charm'. I was smiling and making eye contact all day, trying to make the people listening to music come to the booths.

Jyou-kun was such a good sport. I bossed him around all day, and so did some of the others, but he just did whatever needed doing. Isn't that a good attitude? If someone bossed me around, I'd prooobably get all snippy and say no, unless it was a friend.

I sold so many plants and sweets, and I think I sold one to all of my friends' parents. There were a few left over, and I gave them to my friends. Jyou-kun got the nicest one as a reward for his hustle. Oh, haha, and I made sure to give Koushiro-kun a plant in a pot that Eimi-chan painted- and to tell him that, of course! He didn't give much of a reaction. So frustrating!

Sora-chan's clothes were so beautiful... I begged her to make me some of her styles in different colors, and in my size, obviously. I saw a bunch of girls ask her to make things for them. I really think she will be a successful designer, and I hope this convinced her that she can! And her mom, too. She looked a little more relaxed than usual, maybe because she wasn't in her apartment, which is also the home of her famous ikebana school? No kimono that day, anyway. They're so uncomfortable. I wonder if that's why she's so stiff?

My parents were so sweet. They met all of my friends and invited them to come over any time. Aren't they the best? And when we went home, they had so many good things to say about everyone. And Koushiro-kun fixed Papa's computer, so they were impressed about that. They loved The Teenage Wolves, too!

Speaking of, _wow,_ Sora-chan had better get a move on if she's serious about Yamato-kun, because damn! He was amazing, and I think pretty much every girl is his fan. Okay, I'm exaggerating, but honestly? A lot of girls are into him.

And I mean, I get it. Mysterious loner charm? Yep. Smart? Check. Talented? Double check. Smokin'? Hot damn! As for me, I understand attraction, but I guess I'd need more than that before I went all gooey and fangirly, you know?

Which doesn't mean that I'm judging Sora-chan, because they've been making googly eyes at each other for a while now. Anyway, she was so worked up about the performance. It was so fun, because normally she's so in control, but she was screaming with the rest of us and gushing about them, haha!

They were so good! I'm looking forward to hearing the recording. I never knew I liked rock music until I went to the states. They really like to play classic rock over there, and I heard bands like Queen, Styx, The Eagles, and Aerosmith. I think I like pop better, but that was good, too! I mean, The Teenage Wolves obviously aren't up there with them, but for a high school band in its first year, they're pretty amazing, I think.

And holy cow, Eimi-chan! I mean, I saw her sheet music, and I can read it a little, but wow. I didn't know she could sing like that! Why didn't she mention it?! We need to go to karaoke like yesterday! I want to see who can get the higher score and sing some duets. Sora-chan and Yamato-kun can go, too! Heck, let's all go! I wonder if Sora-chan can sing? Hahaha, maybe I can get Jyou-kun, Koushiro-kun, and Taichi-kun to sing! I bet none of them can.

Anyway, yeah, I still don't think Eimi-chan understands her own feelings. I can't wait to have a little _chat_ with her about it. I wonder what I should say? I should probably have Sora-chan with me, so I don't push too hard. Eimi-chan can be so sensitive, which I guess is why she could write a song like that. It was like I could feel her bunched up emotions. I liked the song, and her voice is amazing, but I didn't like feeling all jumbled up. Does she feel like that all the time? That would be so hard!

Ah, I'm getting a call from a friend. Later!

XOXOXO,

Mimi

**15.11.15**

**Sunday**

**Izumi Koushiro**

The Culture Festival went unexpectedly well, but I think it took a toll on everyone. There's been a hush around the classroom, and it feels very conspicuous after the activity these last few weeks. I suppose it must be, if I noticed it.

I didn't enjoy how crowded the classroom was during the bazaar, but fortunately I was occupied with customers most of the time. The overwhelming majority of the problems were simple, issues caused by downloading viruses and the like. I had a few cases where the damage had spread to the point where removing the problems required some effort, but for the most part, everything was straight forward. Some cases called for replacement parts that I simply did not have, but I gave those customers instructions for ordering replacements and promised to service their machines when the parts arrive. Overall, the repair booth was a success, and I made sure to thank Mimi-san for her suggestion.

There were a few awkward cases where male customers inquired about the cause of their computer issues in front of female family members. I didn't know how to explain that certain downloads and web sites they visited- sites of an, ah, adult nature- had undesirable effects on their machines. It took a few attempts, but I eventually put together a script that I hope was vague enough for discretion, but direct enough to communicate the point. I can't say with certainty if I achieved this end.

Thankfully, my parents seemed to enjoy the festival. I introduced them to all of my friends that they haven't met, and they made a point of conversing with all of them. My mother seemed especially taken with Mimi-san, and they talked about baking for a while. I was a bit surprised when my father struck up a conversation about soccer with Taichi-san. He's never brought that subject up with me. I wonder if he's ever disappointed that his son isn't interested in sports? I'm afraid I truly can't create an interest in that topic.

Speaking of Mimi-san, she's been teasing me about Eimi-san lately. I believe I might have missed the first few instances, but her comment when I purchased a slice of Eimi-san's cake was so direct that not even I could misinterpret it. It was something along the lines of, "You don't have to _buy_ sweets from someone who's sweet on you. Just ask her, and she'll make you all the cakes you want."

I was fairly confident that I understood, but an internet confirmed that "sweet on" is a colloquialism for having romantic feelings for someone. After some floundering, I brushed off Mimi-san's teasing; after all, she'll tease at any and every opportunity. I had almost forgotten about the comment by the time The Teenage Wolves gave their Sunday performance.

Eimi-san performed the song she's been working so hard on. I've heard her sing before, but nothing quite like this. I enjoy music, but I'm not as interested in it as the average person seems to be. I suppose I'm not a qualified judge, but her voice is beautiful, and her ability to express emotion is potent. I've watched her agonize over her lyrics, and I was surprised to find that they are about cherishing someone, and a host of convoluted, related emotions. I know that I shouldn't read too much into the lyrics. She was performing, after all. But she seemed so earnest, and I witnessed her difficulty writing the song. The signs seem to indicate that it's important to her.

But even if Eimi-san is writing love songs based on her actual experiences, it's unlikely that Mimi-san's teasing is connected. I know myself too well to suspect that someone could harbor such profound feelings for me. I have very little to offer anyone beyond my technical skills. There's no need for me to panic or behave differently around Eimi-san, although I have a slight and inexplicable urge to do just that.

I can't help but wonder what she's thinking, however. I tried to guess the person she could theoretically be interested in, but I have no leads. I assumed Jyou-san at first, but rejected the idea. Yamato-san seems the next choice, since they spend so much time together as club mates, but again, there's not enough evidence. Perhaps it's one of her other club mates?

But the reality is that I am not observant enough to gather the necessary data. For all I know, my exclusion of females might be presumptuous. And it isn't as if I can inquire, given the sensitivity of the subject. I suppose it's really none of my business, but Mimi-san… She possesses a certain talent for getting under your skin with her teasing.

To make matters worse, Mimi-san leaped on Eimi-san while she was in front of me while in sight of my parents. I tried to ask her to refrain from involving other people in her teasing, but she only laughed and pinched my cheeks. Hard.

My life was simpler before I acquired female friends.

**Cultural Notes:**

**-40,000 yen:** Currently about $325

**Author's notes:** And that's all for now! I have so much material for my stories that just needs some editing, so hopefully December will be filled with updates. I appreciate your reading and reviewing.


	17. December 2

**Voices**

December 2: 7th-13th

**December 7, 2015**

**Monday**

**Anami Eimi**

Dear Kitty,

I'm writing this during English class. I speak English, so usually I just scan Jyou-kun's notes so I can remember the technical names for certain grammatical cases. Anyway, I'm looking around the room, and I guess- this is a little weird, I know- was Koushiro-kun always cute?

I mean, I'm writing in my journal, so I can check and see what I thought when I met him. Hmm. I sure sang the praises of Yama, haha! As for Koushiro-kun, I did mention him, but mostly I talked about his hair and how short he is. He does have really nice hair.

Actually, he's gotten taller. He used to be around my chin, and now I think the top of his head is at my eye level. Yama and Taichi-kun are growing, too; they used to be just a little shorter than me, but they shot past me these last few months.

But back to the point... I don't remember thinking Koushiro-kun was cute before. He's staring at the board and frowning right now, and there's a little vertical line between his eyebrows, and I want to poke it and smooth it out. He would scowl some more if I did that...

I guess boys can grow cuter, just as they can grow taller. I want to ask Mimi-chan if she thinks he's cuter than he was in April, but I think she would tease me. Maybe I could ask Sora-chan or Yama?

It doesn't really matter, though. Sunrise, sunset. Change is the only constant. And so it goes.

**Later**

Okay, so I know I usually don't do this, but it's two days later now, and I'm writing again because I'm kind of freaking out. I _knew_ I shouldn't have said anything about Koushiro-kun to Mimi-chan and Sora-chan. Mimi-chan... she really likes romance, and sometimes she sees whatever she wants to see, and... I shouldn't have said anything. But it's been on my mind so much lately, and it just slipped out somehow.

So then Mimi-chan dragged us to her apartment (she literally pulled me out of my club room while Hiro and Naoki laughed) and started interrogating me. It was all, "I knew you liked him! When did you figure it out? Are you going to tell him? How? I can help you! First, I'll do your makeup and dress you up!" And on and on and on. It was like being under fire. I'm glad that she wants me to be happy, but _yikes_. I kept trying to tell her that I don't view Koushiro-kun romantically, but she wasn't listening to anything she didn't want to hear.

Thank goodness for Sora-chan. She asked all of us a few questions, and everyone talked, and I learned a lot! One of the things I found is that I really am different... I haven't had any of these conversations in the past, but apparently Sora-chan and Mimi-chan think some of the boys are good looking, and they react to that. It makes them physically feel something. I like to look at some people more than others, but it doesn't make me respond physically. But it felt like they could talk about that that stuff for a while, especially Mimi-chan.

I've wondered this before, but… Is something wrong with me? Would I like Koushiro-kun romantically if I reacted to physical appearances like Mimi-chan does? Is attraction all that separates my current feelings for him from romantic feelings? Like I said, I think he's cute, but I don't think about… I don't know, holding his hand or kissing him. Although I do wonder what a kiss tastes like. Does it taste like whatever they last ate? I don't know if I like the sound of that…

I've been thinking about this so much, and I decided that I love Koushiro-kun more than I've ever loved anyone else before. I like his politeness, and I think it's cute when he gets flustered. I love it when he gets annoyed and puts his back up, especially when he ends up snarking. Even though he's so amazingly talented, he's such a dorky nerd, and it's fantastic. He's my favorite person. And I guess that _is_ kind of a big deal, but it doesn't mean that I want to date him.

But when I was waffling over my response to how I feel about Koushiro-kun, Mimi-chan said something that really bothered me: "What would you do if I asked him on a date?"

I brushed the question off because I was already so embarrassed by her barrage, but it keeps coming back to me, and I remember all of these times that I've wanted to monopolize Koushiro-kun, or at least be given special attention from him. That time when he gave a lecture, I wished I were the only one hearing it. When the girls gave him sweets and he said they were so good, I was upset because I couldn't make anything for him. And if I think about Mimi-chan asking him out...

It physically hurts. It's like I can't breathe. I mean, she wouldn't. She was just trying to make a point. But I don't understand why I would react physically to this, but not react physically to Koushiro-kun. Am I just _that_ possessive without even having feelings for him? That's horrible! I mean, it's not great regardless, but at least I could understand it if I had a crush on him.

I feel like this is getting to be just as confusing as the lyrics of my song, and _oh my stars_, everything just snapped together, and it feels a slap to the face. That song is why everyone thinks I like him now! Or wait, was it the "he looks cuter lately" thing? Now even I'm confused! Or was I already confused?

I don't even know! I already had other stuff going on, you know?! I keep teasing Yama about his love letters because I don't know what to do about the note I got in my shoe locker. It says: _Stay away from Ishida-san_.

What the hell is this, _Mean Girls_ meets a bad slice of life anime? I want to show it to Yama and the boys, but I'm afraid they'll either take it too seriously or not seriously enough.

Maybe I'll show Sora-chan. She always knows what to do. But doesn't she like Yama? Does that make this weird? I'm not really sure...

My head feels like it weighs ten tons. I'm going to sleep.

Yours,

Eimi

**15/12/08**

**Tuesday**

**Takenouchi Sora**

Koushiro-kun made a website for selling my clothing already. I can't believe how fast he is! He uploaded pictures of the things I made for the festival (thank goodness I took pictures for my records), and I took pictures of my materials, and now people can order things in specific fabrics. I got a few orders already, so I turned off new orders until I finish my list. I can't believe it! I'm actually making clothing for pay!

I told Mom about it, and she seemed impressed. But she did remind me to stay focused on school... And then she immediately asked me about the AV club recordings from Yamato's performances. I'm glad I'm on friendly terms with Mom recently, but I never really realized how aware and teasing she is before. Mothers are tough, aren't they? I feel like she's always a step ahead of me.

But speaking of Yamato, those recordings are amazing. The AV club mixed them, but he has Koushiro-kun working on them, too. I think they already sound great, but you know how it is. When it's something you made, it's never quite perfect.

I overheard Eimi-chan teasing Yamato about love letters in the genkan. I shouldn't have eavesdropped, but apparently he's received two that she's aware of since the festival. I wonder if people are leaving them under the door to their club room? He brushed it off and said it was no big deal.

I hate to say this, but those letters and his popularity are finally starting to get under my skin. Before I knew what I was doing, I walked down the genkan and asked him if he wanted to do something with me, right in front of Eimi-chan and who even knows who else.

I've never seen him react quite the way he did before. His eyes went wide, and he blushed. I couldn't believe it, but I'm absolutely sure that he was flushing. He turned to finish putting his shoes in his cabinet, and when he closed the door, he was a little more composed.

"S-sure," he said. "W-what did you have in mind?"

And somewhere in those five seconds, I realized what I had done and started to panic. But his reaction was so cute that I was able to stay calm, even though my insides were wriggling. I've never heard him stutter before today. I looked at Eimi-chan and said, "What was it that Mimi-chan said we should try?"

Poor Eimi-chan looked from him to me and back. Thank goodness she went along with it, because I couldn't think of anything to say. "Um, you mean karaoke?"

"Right." I nodded and turned back to Yamato. "Would you like to join us?"

I saw the confusion in his eyes. Why did I start with just us and then add on everyone? I know it was strange, but I couldn't help it; I panicked. But he agreed, and I told Mimi-chan, and now we're all meeting up for karaoke on Saturday night.

It's funny. I try to stay calm and in control, but this time, things went well even though I acted on impulse. I guess it's okay every once in a while. Mimi-chan praised me and said that it's about time I take things into my own hands, but… Well, it feels strange! But it worked out, and I'm really looking forward to singing with everyone, and I hope I can spend some time with Yamato. I'm not that good of a singer, but maybe we can sing a duet. I wonder if I'll work up the nerve to ask him?

**15/12/09**

**Wednesday**

**Tachikawa Mimi**

Dear Diary,

Well, it happened.

When we were changing into our gym uniforms the other day, Eimi-chan asked Sora-chan and me if we thought that Koushiro-kun has gotten cuter. I couldn't believe it! I grabbed her and squished her so hard, even though we were half undressed.

Finally! _Finally_, one of them is showing interest! Thank God!

But we were in the middle of changing, and then we had gym, so I told everyone that we were skipping our clubs today to hold an emergency girl's meeting. Poor Eimi-chan turned so many colors so fast! She's so cute; the pink flew down her face and her neck and almost hit her bra! She was all, "But, but Yamato-" and I was like, "SORRY but that's the wrong boy!" So anyway, I told Yamato-kun that I'm borrowing Eimi-chan today, so there!

So we all went to my place after school, and I think Eimi-chan was wishing the floor would gobble her up. Silly thing! Doesn't she know that this is why you even have friends?!

She was all, "I don't know why you're making such a big deal out of this. It was just an observation."

Uh, yeah! Just the kind of observation I've been waiting for! Both Sora-chan and I agreed that he's been getting cuter, since he grew a few centimeters and his super short hair grew out. Eimi-chan nodded and tried to end it at that, but no way! I've been waiting weeks for one or the other to say something like this, _anything_, geez!

I was getting frustrated because she kept dodging and going silent, but I made myself shut up so Sora-chan could take over. Sora-chan handles her so much better than I can. She's clever, because she didn't make all of the questions about Koushiro-kun. I was impressed! Eimi-chan talks a lot more when there's give and take, instead of someone directly asking her things.

Anyway, I'm starting to think that Eimi-chan is kind of... wired differently than me? Other than laughing over Yamato-kun's good looks and praising Sora-chan and me for our cuteness, she didn't seem too interested in talking about boys and that stuff. Eventually- and this took a_ long_ time- Sora-chan circled around to asking her how she feels about Koushiro-kun.

I was afraid she'd brush it off again, but I guess all of that talking got her going? She looked off to the side for a while and said, "I don't know. I don't feel the way books and movies say you'll feel, with the butterflies and the attraction. But I really like him and admire him, and I feel happy when I'm around him. Sometimes I think about the next time I'll see him, and it makes me feel good."

I guess I was a little let down. I was all geared up for an actual confession! But I also felt a little weird, because that's kind of how I feel about Jyou-kun. But all this time I've been thinking that Eimi-chan likes Koushiro-kun, and I still think she does. So like... Does that mean anything?

Haha, wow, Eimi-chan's infecting me with over thinking! I know when I'm interested in someone. She's the one who's confused.

But I think Sora-chan and I convinced her to at least think about it. I don't know what there is to be confused about, though. If you like someone, you like them! Eimi-chan and Sora-chan can be so guarded.

Oh! But! Sora-chan asked Yamato-kun to go to karaoke with us, yesssssss! Can you believe it?! I'm so proud of her! I'm going to help her get her voice ready so she can _own it_! In fact, I'm going to go look up song ideas right now!

Really though, would it kill Yamato-kun to pursue her a little? Sora-chan said he's gone to some of her tennis matches, so that's something, but seriously. Boy needs to get his ass in gear. I wonder if he's used to being pursued at this point? He'd better step up his act if he wants a super grade A cutie like my Sora-chan! Geez!

XOXOXO,

Mimi

**15.12.10**

**Thursday**

**Izumi Koushiro**

I'd like to purchase Christmas gifts for my parents, but I'm at a loss for an appropriate choice. Generally, my family's Christmas activities consist of a large dinner and a gift for me from my parents, but now that I'm in high school, I feel it's time to reciprocate. They've been even more supportive than usual this year, so I would like to show my appreciation, if I can.

I asked Eimi-san, Sora-san, and Mimi-san what I should purchase for my mother. They agreed to go shopping with me this Saturday before the karaoke meet up, which was more than I wanted (especially since I was planning to skip the event). But I need the help, so I grit my teeth and agreed.

Then Mimi-san told me that she and Sora-san are busy at that time, and Eimi-san will help me. I'm no expert, but I feel as though I've been set up. Eimi-san looked genuinely confused, so I assume she wasn't in on Mimi-san's plan.

I hate to admit this, but I've been investigating Mimi-san's claims that Eimi-san is interested in me. All I can say with certainty is that she seems to seek me out, but she's done that for as long as I've known her. I've been trying to observe her behavior around boys, but I haven't witnessed anything suggesting a developing romance. I fear my knowledge base on the subject is insufficient, so I searched online for signs of love. The list is quite long, I'm afraid. It's too much data to handle without a record on hand, at least for a neophyte such as myself, and naturally, I can't stare at my laptop while trying to interact with people, as much as I'd like to.

I asked Jyou-san for his opinion in private, and was shocked to hear that he agrees with Mimi-san. I asked for evidence, but he seemed unwilling to entertain the topic. While I understand his hesitance, I can't accept an argument that is not supported by data.

This all makes no sense. Why would Eimi-san feel any particular regard for me? I was baffled enough by her friendship, let alone any potential romantic admiration. Jyou-san asked me how I feel about her, and I responded that I enjoy her company and find her talented and likable. But I've never entertained the notion of romance in my life.

He said that maybe I should start to, but it isn't as if I can turn an emotion on. I suppose I could try to consider it, but I'm led to believe that romance involves feelings outside of logic and rational consideration. That's probably why I'm at a loss.

I'm almost certainly overreacting, however. I'm sure this is merely a misunderstanding. There's no need to waste further time on the topic when I have a program to work on and concert recordings to tweak.

**15.12.11**

**Friday**

**Kido Jyou**

I'm beat. They're really cranking things up now that the events are over. We have tests before our winter break, which starts Saturday, December 19, and we return to school on Monday, January 4. Which means that tests are really too close for comfort!

So why are my friends planning karaoke this weekend? Don't they care about their grades? I tried to say no, but Mimi-chan... Well, you know how it is. I guess it's only a few hours... I'll spend the rest of the day studying. Koushiro-kun and Eimi-chan are coming over in the afternoon, but they're leaving to go shopping at some point, apparently.

Speaking of, it sounds like Koushiro-kun finally picked up on Mimi-chan's teasing. He asked me if I also think that Eimi-chan likes him. I felt really uncomfortable, because I don't want to talk about someone else's feelings. But I couldn't lie, so I told him that I do think so.

I tried to leave it at that, but he asked all of these questions, wanting proof, I guess. He seemed kind of out of sorts. I don't know what his problem is. Obviously I'm caught up on Mimi-chan, but if I didn't like someone in particular, well... I mean, I'm not saying that you should date anyone who is interested you, but if she's a good person and you like being around her… Who doesn't want a nice girlfriend?

Koushiro-kun, I guess. I told him to at least consider it. Don't just brush off someone's feelings without entertaining the possibility. Poor Eimi-chan... I don't think she's as aware of things as I am, but I bet she'd take it pretty hard if Koushiro-kun rejected her.

He's probably just going to ignore it, though. I don't really know if that's better or worse. Geez, it's not all that often that someone thinks you're special. Why would you ignore that?

Christmas Eve is coming up, but I guess that doesn't matter for me. It's not like Mimi-chan would be interested in going out with me. I wonder what she'll be doing? Something with Sora-chan, maybe?

I need to forget all of this and study. The tests don't care about our stupid teenage drama.

**15/12/12**

**Saturday**

**Yagami Taichi**

So we won our first few matches in the tournament. 'Won' is kind of an understatement, though. We're kicking ass out there, which is great, because we're competing to represent Tokyo in the All Japan High School Soccer Tournament. That takes place during winter break, but one step at a time.

We haven't played Jindai yet. It looks like they'll be one of our later matches. We've worked hard, and I hope everyone keeps their head this time. I know we can do it if we play our best game.

Sora came to one of my matches. It was tempting to show off, but I forced myself to say serious. Luckily, I played really well, and she seemed impressed. We went out for coffee and pastries after, and I probably shouldn't have eaten three cinnamon rolls in front of her, but _damn_ I'm hungry.

Oh, speaking of Sora, apparently we're going to karaoke on Saturday night. Sounds fun! And it will do me good to get my head out of the field. Other than my teammates, my social life's been dry lately. I hope I'm not missing too much.

Hikari tells me that my singing sounds like Meeko crying for food, but she's just teasing. It can't be that bad. Right?

**15/12/13**

**Sunday**

**Ishida Yamato**

Things have been all over the place lately.

Ever since the concert at school, I've been getting more letters than ever, and apparently my band mates are getting some, too. I've also had two girls confess to me this week in person. I didn't know either of their names, because I've never spoken to them before.

Eimi was talking to me about it when Sora showed up. I wanted to cover Eimi's mouth, but obviously that wasn't an option. All I could do was stand there while she talked about my love letters in front of Sora.

Then something weird happened. I saw Sora grimace, and then her face set with determination. She walked straight to me and asked me to go out with her, just like that: "Would you like to go out with me some time?"

I hate to say this, but I completely lost it. I felt color rushing to my face, and I could hardly say anything. I ducked behind the door to my shoe locker. Totally smooth, yeah? _Dammit._

I don't know, I couldn't help it. Her expression was so serious and earnest, like it meant a lot to her. Having her look me in the eye like that... My stomach knotted and dropped down to my ankles.

Maybe it's because I panicked, or maybe it's because Eimi was there, but she suggested a group karaoke outing. Dammit! I think I might have been_ this close _to being asked on a date. It figures that the girl I want isn't one of the ones writing letters or confessing…

But karaoke was a good time. Mimi-chan's been telling me that she likes to sing, and she has a nice voice. She insisted on doing a few duets with me, and I sang with Eimi, too. But I liked singing with Sora the best. She has a gentle voice, and her natural tone is pleasing, but she must not sing much. I asked her if she'd like me to teach her some technique, and she said yes. And now we're going back together over winter break, just us this time.

Taichi overheard us making plans- it's kind of hard for him not to, since there were seven of us in a fairly small room. He didn't look happy, but I have to give him credit. He didn't pitch a fit or even say anything snappy to anyone. He didn't sing another song after that, though.

It's so annoying that I feel bad for him. I mean, it's too early for me to be celebrating, but I think things are coming along nicely with Sora. Taichi's obnoxious sometimes, but he's not a bad guy. Even though I don't want him to get what he wants in this case, I don't like to see him put out.

His singing might actually qualify as a war crime, though. Luckily Mimi pretty much told him what I wanted to say, and he's less likely to get into an argument with her. Jyou is... pretty bad, too. Koushiro can hold a tune, and he's actually not bad, but I wouldn't say he's good. He plays it too flat. I don't think he enjoyed it much.

But the girls had a good time. We should go back together some time, but until then, I'm happy to go with just Sora.

**Culture Notes**

**Christmas Eve… doesn't matter for me:** There aren't many Christians in Japan, so for most people, the holiday is not religious. In fact, Christmas Eve is a date night! Couples celebrate by getting each other a present, going to fancy restaurants, and, well… Booking hotels for the night, shall we say. Since he has no girlfriend, Jyou feels he has no reason to think about Christmas Eve. There are some Christmas Day traditions, but I'll cover them later.

**All Japan High School Soccer Tournament: **I didn't make this up! It's a real thing XD It's an annual nationwide high school association soccer tournament. It's the largest scale amateur sport event in Japan, and it takes place over winter break.

So, since winter break is coming, I will have one more _Voices_ update this month, and then they will start again on the first week of January. In the meantime, I'll be posting one more _Growing Up with You_ chapter and the final two chapters of _The Ouija Board_. Come check everything out! Thanks for reading and reviewing :)


	18. December 3

**Voices**

December 3: 14th-20th

**December 14, 2015**

**Monday**

**Anami Eimi**

I had such a great weekend. After classes let out on Saturday, Koushiro-kun and I went to Jyou-kun's place to study for our exams. Then we went shopping for a gift for his mom. We were originally planning to go in a bigger group, but Sora-chan and Mimi-chan backed out, and I think... Well, they probably did it on purpose.

So it was just us going to the mainland and shopping. They don't have many malls here, at least not quite in the same way we do in the states. The stores are clustered together, but they're not all inside a shared building. So to find some shops, we took a train from Odaiba to Shinjuku. It took about half an hour and opened up into what is, for me, a level of hell.

There were people EVERYWHERE, on the sidewalk, on the road, in the stores, just a massive crowd. The buildings are tall and crowded together and flash with lights and ads on screens, even during the day. It was sensory overload; without realizing it, I found myself clinging to Koushiro-kun's arm just to ground myself. I felt like I'd get swept away.

He asked me if I was alright, and I said yes, but maybe I was lying just a little. I've mostly stuck to Odaiba so far, since I'm so busy with school, my club, and my friends. It's easy to forget that we're a little isolated from the crush of Tokyo mainland.

It wasn't until Koushiro-kun found the store he wanted that I realized I was holding onto him. He chose this enormous department store, and I kid you not, there were people waiting to bow at us as we walked through, and I was like whaaaaaaaat. Then I let go of him and figured I should bow back, so I did, but then they bowed again, and I thought I heard Koushiro-kun laugh just a little as he motioned me away.

The place was massive. It must have had fifteen floors, each one with different wares. There were pretty ladies in the elevators to tell you what is where and to push the buttons. I wanted to let Koushiro-kun do the talking, but he kind of... froze up, so I said we wanted the house ware department.

Once we were out of the elevator and had a little free room around us, I asked him what was wrong. I guess he was embarrassed, because he turned red. "I have difficulty with sales clerks," he muttered.

I had to swallow a laugh. I kind of know where he's coming from. It can make you nervous to have a stranger approach you and put all of their attention on you with such a big smile, but I've never gone into shock like that. I wonder if that's why he really wanted help going out? But then, couldn't he have ordered something online?

I led him to the kitchen stuff and started looking through it. It was fun, trying to imagine what Izumi-san might want. We really wanted to get her a standing mixer for baking, but it was too expensive. Instead, I helped Koushiro-kun pick out a few unusual spices and ingredients, just to see what his mom might do with them. We also got an electronic kitchen scale for more precise cooking (I think I might have made him laugh with that... Was it too nerdy?), a pretty, hand-carved wooden spoon, and a cute wall hook for her apron.

Apparently his mom likes to try new foods, so Koushiro-kun's using to send money to my mom, and she's mailing him American spices and treats. I might ask for a few treats... I don't have much money, though. I wonder if she'll get some for me?

I tried to help Koushiro-kun at the register. He did better there than in the elevator, I guess since there's a task involved. But sometimes he would hesitate and get tongue-tied, and I sort of slipped in and engaged the clerk with small talk. I kept nudging him beneath the counter when I did it until he gave me one of those great scowls.

Anyway, I think we did pretty well. Presents are even harder in Japan, because you have to keep in mind everyone's small living space... Food is often a good choice.

After we finished shopping, we went to the basement level for dinner. I was shocked again, because this was not your typical mall food court. Koushiro-kun called it a "depachika" and translated it for me as a "food hall." It was like... a collection of individual vendors, all selling specialty items. There was a fish market and a small supermarket, too! The displays were so pretty and brightly lit!

I was in for another surprise when I saw the price tags; ouch! Then Koushiro-kun said he was treating me in return for my help, and I almost dropped the cookie tin I was holding. I tried to turn him down. No one's ever bought food for me outside of my family, and I can't really say why, but I felt embarrassed and anxious. But we went back and forth a few times until he said, "I insist," and my mouth snapped shut. I was always taught to stop arguing if someone says that.

So... Yeah. He took me to the patisserie section, too... I got some kind of chocolate mousse tart thing, and it was _amazing_. And I felt all jittery because he kept smiling when I ate the pastry, and I realized it was because I was, well, very obviously enjoying it.

By then it was getting late, so we hurried to the karaoke place, which was closer to Odaiba. Everyone was dressed so cute, you should have seen Mimi-chan, Sora-chan, and Yama! I wish I could be stylish.

I've never been to karaoke before. We were shown into a private room (classy!). It was lined with long, cushioned benches with a table in the middle. A screen and speakers were mounted on the far wall, and there was a telephone to call in food and drink orders to the front desk. Everyone bought something, which I thought was strange; don't they know that eating and drinking interferes with your singing?

In typical Mimi-chan fashion, she herded Koushiro-kun to the far edge of the booth, then told me to go next. Then she got in and squashed me into him. Dear gods... Jyou-kun sat next to her, and the others filled in the opposite side.

I had so much fun! I'm confident when I sing. It feels so amazing, like I'm capable and strong and attractive, because it feels good and it sounds good and everyone is impressed, and it can be hard not to feel drunk on it. Not that I've ever had alcohol before, but I assume it's similar?

I was surprised at how well my friends can sing! Usually it's hard to find someone in a room who can hold their own vocally, but obviously Yama rocks, and Mimi-chan has a bright, poppy voice. Sora-chan has such a pretty, relaxing tone; she could be really good if she learned technique. And he has no natural inclination for it, but I like Koushiro-kun's cute tenor.

But Jyou-kun sings in a chatty sort of monotone, like he's trying to avoid actually singing. Taichi-kun I think is just tone deaf. You should have seen Yama grimacing in the corner.

I really hope we get to do this again, even though I think Koushiro-kun and Jyou-kun didn't like it much.

Just... as an update, I have been thinking about how I feel about Koushiro-kun. What I can tell you is that I had an amazing time on Saturday, and I even liked studying for exams with him and some of our friends on Sunday. I just... I'm happy when I see him. I want to be around him. And it can be hard to tell, but he seems to like being around me? I hope so...

I don't know enough to say if I'm in love, but I am happy.

Yours,

Eimi

**15/12/15**

**Tuesday**

**Ishida Yamato**

Not much to say at the moment. Tests are on, so it's been busy. I'm trying to study and not bug Koushiro about how the recordings are coming. And I'm really trying not to worry about taking Sora to karaoke. I mean, it's Sora. It will be fine, right?

I hate feeling anxious. It's just not like me. But I don't want to mess things up with her, and this feels like an important opportunity. You only get one first date.

Ugh, I somehow let my plans with her slip to Takeru. He's been barraging me with dating advice from god even knows where. He looks like a kid in a candy store whenever he talks about it. Well, I guess I know he likes Sora... I teased him about Hikari-chan until he shut up.

Apparently my family- all four of us- are going to a shrine together on New Year's Day. It was Takeru's idea, of course. I hope this works out... I mean, it should be fine, but... I don't remember the last time all four of us were together.

I know exams are on, so there's not much time to talk, but Taichi still seems quiet. I almost want to ask if he's okay, but he'd probably think I'm gloating or something. I should probably leave him.

Hope he's alright. I wouldn't want to be in his place right now, though.

**15.12.16**

**Wednesday**

**Kido Jyou**

It's exam week, and I don't have time for this.

I guess I should say something... Oh, on top of everything else, Mimi-chan can sing like a pop idol. Of _course_ she can. I bet she can dance, too... I always assume there's no way I could feel more attracted to her, and I'm always wrong.

She looked really happy when she was singing. Is it weird that I was a little jealous of how much she was praising Yamato-kun's singing? And I wish she would pull me close like she did with Sora-chan and Eimi-chan to sing together.

But of course, singing is another one of the talents that I just don't have. All I have is school, but Koushiro-kun is clearly smarter than me, and Eimi-chan might be a little ahead, too...

Forget this. I need to get back to work.

**15.12.17**

**Thursday**

**Izumi Koushiro**

I've been enjoying myself recently, but that familiar social exhaustion is creeping in. Thankfully, I should be able to spend time alone over the winter break.

Eimi-san accompanied me to a department store in Shinjuku over the weekend. I was initially reluctant to go alone with her, not out of distaste for her company, but because of the social pressure of a one-on-one outing. My discomfort was compounded by Mimi-san's insinuations about Eimi-san's feelings. I was still and silent for most of the train ride, wishing that I hadn't requested assistance. In retrospect, I realize that she might have taken offense to my taciturn behavior, and I hope that isn't the case.

The crowd in Shinjuku seemed to overwhelm Eimi-san. She took my arm, and I almost asked her to release me. I doubt she realizes that such gestures are far more uncommon in Japan than the states. But... She was in the crowd because of my request, and it occurred to me that her comfort was my responsibility. I ignored my misgivings.

Unfortunately, my anxiety spiked further when we boarded the elevator. As the woman asked for my floor number, I realized that this was my first shopping experience unaccompanied by a parent. They've always interacted with the clerks on my behalf.

It's infuriating, because logically I'm aware that there's no reason to be uncomfortable in these situations. Still, the total focus of a stranger is disconcerting to me, and I hesitated. Eimi-san stepped in, and she spoke to the other clerks on my behalf, as well, although she literally nudged me into speaking more and more with each new encounter.

Her gift choices for my mother surprised me. She went straight for the home good section, disregarding anything too large, too expensive, or too frivolous on her own. But while her choices were pragmatic, they were thoughtful, an aspect I feared I would lack on my own. She chose various kitchen items, spices, and foods, all with an eye towards how my mother cooks and what she has and does not have in her kitchen. And she presented her suggestions as options, granting me the feeling and outward appearance of making the final selections.

I recognize the value of her help, so to show my appreciation, I treated her to dinner. It was only after I offered that I realized the potential for romantic overtones, especially since we were alone. I fear I made Eimi-san embarrassed and uncomfortable, and yet all I could think of to do was to keep insisting. Thankfully, she took pity on me and my inability to salvage the situation and accepted.

I was flustered until we sat down to eat. Eimi-san's emotional range is bewildering. Sometimes, she's quiet and withdrawn. A moment later, her attitude is infectiously chipper, and that's what happened when she began eating. Apparently she's never been to a depachika, and other than the crowd, she seemed to enjoy it. I'm glad I was able to provide a pleasant experience, even if it was by chance.

While we ate, she expressed her fear that we were boxing my mother in with our gift choices. That idea troubled me far more than a simple comment should have. I've always seen my mother as a warm, capable woman, but I relate to her solely as my mother. She cooks and cares for the apartment and the people in it. I've relied on her to provide for my needs and support me, but... Shouldn't our relationship be more than that?

I expressed this as best as I could (which was very clumsily, of course). Eimi-san smiled in a way I couldn't quite decipher. She said, "Realizing something like that means you're maturing. All children relate to their parents solely as parents initially. So don't feel bad about that, okay? Use that energy to learn more about them in the future instead."

I pointed out that I don't know how to learn more about them, and Eimi-san laughed. "Oh, yes you do! Just as questions, like you always do."

I was both amused and irked at how easy she made it sound. I asked if she was volunteering to be my guinea pig, and she agreed. Framing questions was difficult at first, but grew easier as the conversation went on. Her replies often led to an obvious question, though I can't say if this was natural or by her design.

We lost track of time and had to rush to karaoke. I'm not a fan, but the group seemed to enjoy it, and watching was not without its amusements. I wish Mimi-san and the others hadn't cajoled me into singing, but thankfully no one emphasized my performance except for Eimi-san, who seemed to enjoy it far more than it merited.

I begin to sense that this is simply a reflection of Eimi-san's attitude towards me. I'm still struggling to comprehend it. I'm not certain if I ever will.

**15/12/18**

**Friday**

**Takenouchi Sora**

We're already so busy preparing for the New Year at home. We celebrate traditionally, so there's so much to do: the cleaning, the food, the traditional decor, the floral arrangements, the cards... I'm exempt until exams end and break starts, but I'll be joining in soon.

Thank goodness I have some activities lined up with my friends. I'm really looking forward to karaoke with Yamato. I'm a little nervous... I've never been on a date, and I could hardly believe it when he asked me. I wonder if he originally planned to, or if it just happened when I said I would like to learn how to sing?

Mimi-chan's been on dates in the states, so I asked her what I should do. She said I should be myself and keep calm. She seems to think that I have Yamato wrapped around my finger already. That's very complimentary of her, but... Well, I think she's more confident in me than I am.

Still, she is right that there's nothing to be gained from being nervous. But what should I wear? I bet Mimi-chan would have some opinions on that!

I'm also going to Taichi's finalist soccer match on Sunday. He's put so much effort into this. I really hope he wins, but the team they're up against is amazing. But if anyone can beat them, it's Taichi. I asked our friends to go with me to support him, and I was surprised when most of them said yes. I didn't think Eimi-chan or Koushiro-kun would be interested, and he did say no at first. But Eimi-chan said, "Wouldn't it be interesting to see your strategies at play?", and then Taichi showed up and basically demanded that he come. You could see the moment when Koushiro-kun caved. His shoulders fell and he rolled his eyes, but he smiled just a little.

I feel like our group is really beginning to click. Taichi and Yamato don't fight anymore, although I can't say they're friendly. But then, is Yamato ever openly friendly? I think he still hasn't spoken to some of our classmates.

That boy... What should I do with him?

**15/12/19**

**Saturday**

**Tachikawa Mimi**

Ahhhh yessss I'm freeeee! I'm so happy! Two weeks of freedom! What should I do first?!

Hmm, well, I would love to sing some more. Karaoke isn't nearly as big in the states, and I forgot how much I love to sing. I loved the look on everyone's faces when I did my first song! That's right, Mimi is invincible!

Maybe I'll invite Sora-chan and Eimi-chan! I'd invite everyone, but I want Eimi-chan to give us technique lessons, since she's had more training than me.

Oh! Speaking of training, I heard Yamato-kun asking Sora-chan on a date to the karaoke place! Hm, maybe I should push back our outing, then. But! Finally, the boy made a move! I hope he doesn't lose his nerve when they're alone together ;)

Let's see, something we can all do together... Ah! Let's have a Christmas party! I'll host it, and the girls can bake, and the boys can buy snacks and food. Hey, maybe someone has a karaoke machine we can use! Or some kind of game. Oooooh, I would love to play truth or dare. Can you imagine the trouble I could cause?

And then there's New Year's, of course. Maybe we could visit a shrine together? Hmm, actually, New Year's is usually a family holiday... We should have lots of fun together beforehand, then.

But enough of writing! It's time to kick off my vacation with a shopping trip! Let me call Sora-chan and Eimi-chan, and maybe one of the boys would like the honor of carrying our bags!

XOXOXO,

Mimi

**15/12/20**

**Sunday**

**Yagami Taichi**

It's over.

Long story short, we lost to Jindai. It was really rough. Hikari and Mom were there, and so were some of my friends. Vacation just started, so people were free, and Sora, Koushiro, Eimi, and Mimi showed. All of those people saw us lose.

It sucked, but we played a great game this time. I'm proud of us. I mean, we made it to the finals, which is further than my school has ever gone. When we were about to leave the locker room, Cap said a few words, then turned it over to me. I was surprised, but I told everyone that we had worked hard, that Jindai was just another team like the ones we had already beaten, and that we had better play our damned best after coming so far.

And... Well, we did. I don't think we've ever played so well. It was amazing, all of us throwing ourselves into it, forgetting everything but playing. But it still really, really sucks that we lost. Our team has a lot of third years, and this was their last chance to make the All Japan Tourney.

But even though we were all so bummed out, Cap gave a speech when we got back to the locker room. He said that we didn't make it, but if we keep working as hard as we have, we could next year. Then he did something I'm still flipping out over.

He said (and this is all true, I swear!) that I was the reason we were able to improve and play our best against Jindai. I made the training plan and the game strategy. I yelled at everyone for playing like crap against Jindai in the past out of fear. I encouraged everyone.

And so, when he graduates, he's naming me the next Captain.

Usually the head of a club is a third year, unless there are none. So I couldn't believe it at first, and I kind of looked around the group. But he was serious, and no one objected, so I tried to say something to accept. Hell if I know what came out of my mouth, though.

Normally the team hangs out after tournament games, but I guess we needed time to ourselves after the loss. I found my family and friends and told them the news. I'm a pretty lucky guy. They were all excited about it.

We went to dinner, and now here I am, writing this and feeling jumbled. I don't even know. I'm happy to be the new captain, and I'm proud of how far the team came so fast. But I hate that we lost, and... Well, I think I lost in another way, too.

While we were at karaoke last weekend, Yamato asked Sora on a date, or something that sure as hell sounded like one. She smiled (that smile freaking kills me, the one that makes her eyes all warm) and said yes.

I've been trying not to think about it. I threw myself into training, and then there were exams. But now it's over, and I've got two weeks of free time ahead of me, and... Shit.

I mean, it's not like one date seals everything forever, but... I don't know. I've seen how they look at each other. Even I'm not that clueless, although I've tried like hell not to notice.

Look, this is life. I know that stuff doesn't always happen like you want it to. I'll get over it, but... It might take some time. I can't help it. Sora's pretty damned amazing, you know?

I've been all messed up lately, too focused on soccer, too caught up on Sora... I just hope I feel like myself again soon.

**Author's Notes: **There will be no Voices updates during the two week Winter Break. I'll see you again in the week of January 4th! In the meantime, I will be updating Growing Up with You and The Ouija Board, so please check those out. Thank you for reading and reviewing! My stats page has been broken for about a week, so reviews are more appreciated than ever, since I can't see if people are reading or not. Happy Holidays!


	19. January 1, Pt 1

**Voices**

January 1, Pt 1: 4th-10th

**16/01/04**

**Monday**

**Yagami Taichi**

Things are too damned quiet over New Year's. It's weird, because everyone loves to be lazy, but after a few days of lounging around, I get antsy. And everything is closed, and people are busy with their families, and it's too damned cold to play soccer.

Well, I had a few good times before the new year. My soccer team got together for a Christmas party. We had a hot pot and turned off the lights, and naturally everyone brought weird crap to put in there. Someone melted a damned chocolate bar in the stew. I tried to bring a durian, but Hikari swapped it out of my cooler for some kind of spiced pork. It was spicy enough to be interesting, but tasty... Or at least it might have been before the chocolate and gods know what else.

That's the thing when dudes get together: no one can cook. There were no homemade sweets or anything, either. Apparently Yamato can cook, but he's the only guy I know who can.

Luckily, Mimi had a year ending party, and there was so much food. Her mom's cooking is hilarious, man. She made everything really plain and offered all of these wild add-ons, like strawberries, jelly beans, whipped cream, cinnamon, coconut, and on and on... For soba! Jyou kept making sick faces as I ate weirder things, so naturally I kept going and challenging Yamato and Sora. Yamato likes to act so cool, but I can ruffle him if I push hard enough. And the girls brought homemade sweets; _score_!

I celebrated New Year's as usual. My family and I went to a shrine on New Year's Day. Normally I don't think too much about my wishes and goals for the new year. It's always stuff like, "Protect Hikari" and "win soccer." But... I don't know. I still want that stuff, but this year I feel like...

If I were more mature, if I thought about stuff more... Would Sora have chosen me? Would I have told her how I feel? And would I have worked harder with my team from the start and thought of group strategies instead of focusing just on my own performance?

I dunno, it's been so freaky. It's like the world was as simple as ever a few months ago. And suddenly, it got bigger and colder and confusing. I can't get a girl just because I like her. I can't always win just by trying my hardest. I can't even always win by trying my hardest with teammates. And hell, how am I supposed to keep Hikari safe when she has a life independent of me? I don't know the girls she spent New Year's Eve with. And what do I know about Takeru, really? Are they dating? She skirts around it when I ask.

Anyway, this year I want to combine thought and action. I have people to help me, you know? Koushiro and Jyou are smart, Eimi and Sora catch emotional stuff that I miss, Mimi has enough energy and charm for all of us, and... Well, I hate to say this, but Yamato has a pretty good balance.

He still needs to get over himself and his feeeeeeelings sometimes. C'mon dude.

Geez, I don't even know what changed or why I feel this way now. I want to get out of here and get moving. I'm gonna hit the gym.

**16/01/05**

**Tuesday**

**Takenouchi Sora**

This is going to be a wonderful year.

I was exhausted coming into the new year. Every year, the family school wraps up all of its business transactions so we have a fresh start in the new year. My mother was busy with that and the decorating, so a lot of the cleaning, card sending, and well-wishing was left to me.

Plus, I wanted to keep my little clothing business up to date, so I completed all of the pending orders and shipped them out before the end of the year. I opened a new ordering period on Monday, and it's already full!

I can't believe everything's going so well with my sewing... My customers are sending me pictures of themselves modeling their clothes, and Koushiro-kun added a gallery to the site so I can upload them.

I asked Mom what I should do with the money. My savings account doesn't offer enough interest to justify storing it all there. She suggested taking out a percentage to cover costs and for spending money, then putting the rest into a long-term savings account for college.

On the surface, the ikebana school seems like purely an artistic endeavor, but it's a business, too. Mom is a smart businesswoman, and she's going to start teaching me how to run a business financially. Obviously mine is much smaller in scale, but most of the skills are still applicable.

I'm exhausted, but also so grateful and excited to be planning for the future so young.

But things are going well right now, too. When Yamato asked about our karaoke date, I suggested Christmas Eve. I know it was bold, but... Well, if we're already planning a date, then it's a given that we're interested in one another, right? It didn't seem like that much of a stretch. Still, it was so hard to sound calm and normal when I said it.

I definitely surprised him. He looked dazed for a few seconds! Then he snapped back into focus and said, "Christmas Eve- Yeah- Definitely-". And then he realized that he was babbling, and he turned pink.

There is nothing better than making Yamato lose his cool. He's so proud of his composure, and he _is_ calm and mature. But if you hit the right buttons, he's more emotional than the average person. I can't believe his relationship with me is one of those buttons.

It makes me feel confident and safe with him. I know he's not playing around with me. If he were, he wouldn't react like that when I propose a Christmas Eve date. I can trust him and his intentions.

As for the date itself, Mom was very particular about what time I should come home (no later than ten). I made sure to obey all of her suggestions; I don't want her to worry. Yamato picked me up and made small talk with Mom that was significantly less smooth than his norm.

We were going to karaoke, but he was dressed so sharply, even though he obviously took pains to dress down his blazer and slacks. But I shouldn't tease him; Mimi-chan spent nearly an hour dressing me, and another doing my hair and makeup. She only left about fifteen minutes before he arrived. I'm so lucky I have her; her work was fantastic, and she gave me the pep talk of the century. I needed it! I thought I was calm, but my nerves started spiking around two. I would have been a mess without her.

We had a karaoke room to ourselves, and Yamato taught me how to breathe from my diaphragm. It's hard- I kept slipping back into breathing from my chest. We kept ordering the same song and working on enunciation and when to breathe. I never realized how easy it is for certain sounds to be lost when you sing.

Before I realized it, Yamato was beside me with his hand on my stomach, making sure my diaphragm was moving. It was embarrassing to sing in front of him, but he encouraged me. I can't believe it, but I improved in just an hour and a half!

We had dinner afterward, and Yamato dropped me off at home. He made a point of wishing my mother a good night, which was sweet.

And naturally I spent the next hour telling Mimi-chan everything that happened over the phone.

As I said, I was busy, so I didn't see any of my friends until New Year's Eve. Mimi-chan had a party, and it was so lovely to see everyone together and relaxed. Even Jyou-kun looked calm, which was a wonderful change, and Koushiro-kun was more talkative than I've ever seen him. We ate soba, mochi, and sweets, and I tried to convince Taichi to not dump yogurt into his bowl. I'm afraid I failed. I don't know how he managed to eat so many strange things and then follow it up with two slices of Eimi-chan's cake, two of my cinnamon rolls, and six of Mimi-chan's cookies. Where does he put it?!

The party ended at one in the morning, but I had my mother's permission to watch the first sunrise of the new year with Yamato (I think she can't help being charmed by him. I know the feeling.) I went home and slept for a few hours, then met up with him.

I wanted to hike up a hill or something, but Odaiba is a flat man-made island. Instead, we sat on cushions on top of Yamato's apartment building and huddled together with coffee for warmth.

I'm so glad that Yamato doesn't need to talk all the time. We spoke a little, but we were mostly silent as the horizon blushed and brightened. I love color so much. Most of my dreams are just washes and bursts of colors, and I could watch the sun rise and set every day.

I was in a sort of trance with my head on his shoulder when he called my name. I looked up, and his expression was so serious, but also shy. He hesitated, then said, "I hope we can spend a lot of time together this year."

I'm not really sure how the next part happened. I didn't know what to say, but I found his hand and squeezed it. I think he moved in most of the way, but then he stopped, and there was so much going on in his eyes, and they were so blue, and he was flushed, and... I knew what he wanted.

I leaned in the rest of the way. His lips were cold, but his breath was warm, and suddenly my body heated up. How is it possible to touch someone's lips with yours and feel it everywhere? Just a little bit of contact swept all over me, and I wanted more so badly, but it's not like we could just... keep kissing outside in public!

Still, I have no idea how long we kissed. The particulars are a blank; the rush and the sensation of it is what I remember.

It was so hard to walk away from him after that. It didn't matter how stiff my bottom was or how cold I was, or that I would be going to a shrine and meeting some of the ikebana students that evening. I just wanted to be with him. I hope I wasn't too dazed and distant during our New Year's festivities.

This year, in addition for praying for the health and happiness of my parents and friends, I asked that I can grow into myself as a woman, and that I can become closer to Yamato. What we have now is so new and fragile, and I want it to grow strong. And for a relationship to work, I need to be my best self.

I feel so grateful and hopeful right now. Things are going well with Mom, Dad's research is coming along, my friends are so wonderful, and I'm dating Yamato.

It's going to be an amazing year.

**16.01.06**

**Wednesday**

**Kido Jyou**

A new year is a fresh start, right? I wonder why I still feel so heavy from last year's worries...

I did well on the exams, but is it good enough for med school? I need to improve, but...how? How can I give more at this point? I already don't have a social life, unless you count studying with Koushiro-kun and Eimi-chan. I already attend cram school. Am I just not as smart as my brothers and my father?

I decided that I might be wasting too much energy on the situation with Mimi-chan. Can I work my hardest if I'm pining over her? So I'm trying to get over her, which is kind of hard when we're friends. I'm making an effort to treat her the way I treat Eimi-chan and Sora-chan. I never realized how different my relationship with Mimi-chan is until I stepped back. I hope it doesn't upset her, but what can I do? It's sort of... emotional self-defense. And I'm not blaming her or implying that she did something wrong. It's just... sort of a small, common, run-of-the-mill personal problem. Happens all the time.

We had a party at Mimi-chan's place on New Year's Eve. Her mom really, uh, went all out. I've never seen such a weird spread of food before. I still feel a little nauseous when I think about what Taichi-kun ate. And the volume...! He may be in shape, but his arteries are probably pretty nasty. Not that he listened to me...

My family visited the local shrine together, as always. New Year's is the only time I can count on having everyone at home, since doctors and med students are so busy. I love that everything is closed. Even I relax over New Year's. It's great to see my brothers, and Mom is happiest when we're all together.

I saw Koushiro-kun and Eimi-chan together on their way out of the shrine. She was dressed and made up. I hate to say this, but I was a little jealous of Koushiro-kun. Not over Eimi-chan specifically, of course, but because he has a girl dolling up for him, and I'm not even sure if he noticed or cared. I hope it works out for them. I don't want her to feel heartsick, like I do sometimes. I wonder if I should try to talk to him again... Probably not. If he's not interested, then what can you do? But I wish he'd at least look and see what he has right in front of him.

I always pray for the health of my family and my grades, but this year I asked for wisdom, strength, and maturity, too. Sometimes I think I get so focused on my grades that I miss other things, and I don't just mean outings with friends. Can I grow as a person if I'm only worried about school? But how else can I make sure I become a doctor who helps people? What I need is balance. And I'm stressed enough about school without wallowing in romantic drama.

The new year is the perfect time for these kinds of reflections and changes.

**January 7, 2016**

**Thursday**

**Anami Eimi**

Dear Kitty,

It's official: I love New Year's in Japan!

So apparently, it's traditional to clean your house from top to bottom before the new year. It's because gods visit the house when the year turns, and I guess you don't want to dirty their immortal persons.

I was doing homework with Koushiro-kun and Jyou-kun at the Izumi apartment, and his mother asked if my grandmother needed help cleaning. I sort of stuttered; the Izumi apartment is always spotless, but my grandma can't keep on top of it as well. I thought I turned her down, but she showed up the next day at our place, and Koushiro-kun was with her! He was so clueless about cleaning, I think he spent more time being taught what to do than doing it. But that's okay... I just, I have fun when he's around, and his mom kept assigning us to the same tasks.

I think Izumi-san is the nicest person I know. Who else volunteers to clean an old lady's house? They've never even met before! And she did it so kindly, without forcing herself or making it sound like Grandma can't do it on her own. I want to be like her someday. (Oh, she also thanked me for helping Koushiro-kun pick out her Christmas gift. She said she loved it, which is such a relief!)

Grandma took us all out to dinner after we finished cleaning, and she talked more than I've ever heard her speak before. I always sensed that she's a little lonely. We talk over dinner, but I'm usually at school, club, studying, or with a friend. And talking to a teenager is probably different than talking to another adult. I wish I could do more for her…

While we were eating, Izumi-san invited us to visit a shrine on New Year's Day with her family. I had no idea what that entailed, but Izumi-san said it's important to start the year properly.

When we went back home, Grandma was quiet for a while. Then she took me into her room and opened her closet. There were boxes on the floor, and she showed me the one she wanted. "I found this while I was cleaning, and I think you should have it," she said.

There was a silk kimono inside, all folded and encased in storage paper. The fabric was red with white flowers. Kimonos are very expensive, so I was struggling to respond when she smiled and said, "It belonged to your mother when she was a little older than you."

I've always wondered why Mom left Japan, but I never had the courage to ask. My father hardly seems like someone who could draw a woman away from her home. Grandma was sitting on her bed and smiling sadly, so I figured she was waiting for me to say something. I asked her why my mom left Japan. She said, "It was so long ago, dear. And I'm afraid I never understood, myself."

Ah, the art of the understatement. Jokes aside, I feel so bad for grandma. She has no children in her country, I never even met her until I moved in, and her husband passed when I was small. She has a part time job taking phone calls for a company, and she has some friends, but it must be lonely.

Maybe I looked too sad, because she suddenly smiled and said, "You told me about your friends, but you never mentioned that Koushiro-kun is special to you."

"Grandma!" That was all I could say. I was so flabbergasted. Did I do anything while we were together to suggest that? I don't think so!

She laughed and toddled over. "Let me help you fold that. You want it to look nice when we go to the shrine with the Izumis."

So yeah, that happened. Zeus above, even my _Grandma_ is teasing me about Koushiro-kun now. I don't even know anymore...

On New Year's Eve, Mimi-chan held a bonenkai party. The old year and the new year are apparently viewed as completely separate in Japan, so you have a "year forgetting party" to leave last year's worries behind (usually there's lots of alcohol involved, apparently, but obviously we didn't drink). We ate soba and mochi, sang karaoke on Yama's machine, and watched the specials on TV. At midnight, we heard so many bells. The Buddhist temples ring their bells 108 times at midnight, and I sat out on Mimi-chan's balcony to listen. I guess the others have heard it often enough, but it was new to me, and beautiful.

On January first, Grandma and I visited a Shinto shrine with the Izumis. Izumi-san looked so pretty in her kimono, and her husband couldn't stop looking at her- they're so cute! That reminds me, Grandma insisted on doing my hair and makeup. I never would have guessed that she knew how, but she said, "I was a young once, too, dear, and my hands work as well as ever." She doesn't do it as well as Mimi-chan, but she's much better at it than I am. I was impressed, but also a bit confused. Is dressing up on New Year's something you do for the gods, or do people just like to look nice on holidays? Or is this more teasing about Koushiro-kun?

Koushiro-kun showed me how to purify myself at the fountain, where you rinse your hands and mouth. Even in Odaiba, the shrine was crowded, so we had to wait to pray. As I watched him clap, bow, and pray, I couldn't help but wonder what Koushiro-kun thinks of religion. Knowing him, he probably wants to show respect for his parents and their beliefs, regardless of what he thinks. I don't think he has to visit the shrine often (it might only be once per year). I should ask him sometime.

I tried to pray, but I felt a little weird about it. Am I allowed to just... show up and pray, even though I know nothing about Shintoism? I'm not sure I actually strung something coherent together. What did Koushiro-kun pray for?

Then we drew omikuji, which are sort of... luck forecasts for your year. I got "moderate good fortune." Poor Koushiro-kun got "bad fortune"! But apparently your luck will improve if you tie the fortune to the racks at the shrine. He had trouble finding an empty spot!

Grandma bought me an ema, which is a wooden plaque. She told me to write a wish on it and hang it with the others at the shrine. But just like when I was praying, I had no idea what to ask for, or if I had a right to ask! And Izumi-san was calling me to show me the good luck charms, so I scribbled something down and hung my ema with with others. I kind of feel like I blew my chance to receive blessings in the new year, but… Well, like I said, I don't know if I deserve to be blessed by a religion I don't follow, so it's alright. Besides, Izumi-san bought me a charm… But she didn't tell me until later that it's a charm for luck in love! Do I have "please tease me" stamped on my face?! Sigh… It's a tiny pink pouch on a looped lanyard. I'm supposed to keep it close to me and never open the pouch, which will make it lose its power.

But Koushiro-kun surprised me with a happiness charm, so I guess I don't mind the love charm. They look alike, except that the happiness charm is white, and they have different kanji stamped on the fabric. I don't know anything about the ideology behind them, and they aren't really that cute, but… I'm so blessed to have people thinking about my happiness. I'll be sure to take care of the charms and keep them with me.

Yeesh, and to think, I never celebrated New Year's at all in the states. Everything was closed from January first to the third in Japan, and I spent the time either at home relaxing with Grandma or doing homework and hanging out with whoever was available. Most of my friends were busy with their families, especially Sora-chan with her ikebana school, but I spent some time with my band mates, Koushiro-kun, and Jyou-kun.

Oh, that reminds me. I received cards on January first from all of my friends. Apparently it's tradition to send them, and I didn't even know! I hope they won't be mad. Maybe if I bring cookies to school or something… I'm sure Izumi-san knows a good recipe.

Happy New Year! Moving to Japan has been hard in a lot of ways, but now that I've adjusted for the most part, I've never been happier. I think this year will be great.

Oh, and I've also decided that kotatsu are the dreamiest things ever, and I will always own one, no matter where I live. So there! Basically it's a table with a heater beneath it, and you drape a blanket over the table to capture the heat, and you live there permanently. Or so I wish.

And it's really nice to sit beside Koushiro-kun and peel clementines for him…

Yours,

Eimi

**Cultural Notes:**

**-When Yamato asked about our karaoke date, I suggested Christmas Eve: **Christmas Eve is a date night in Japan, so by suggesting that date for their outing, Sora is voicing her intentions towards Yamato. Get it, girl!

**-Love charm:** Normally you should never buy a love charm for someone unless they either requested one or are your partner (they have paired love charms to help couples stay together). Picking up a charm for yourself if you're single and looking is one thing, but implying that someone needs the help of the gods to find a partner is a bit insulting! Obviously, Koushiro's mom is implying something else that Eimi just isn't picking up on. Good job, Eimi.


	20. January 1, Pt 2

**Voices**

January 1, Pt 2: 4th-10th

**16.01.08**

**Friday**

**Izumi Koushiro**

Christmas went well. I received the two textbooks I requested, as well as some new clothing: a sweater, a dress shirt, dress socks, slacks, a blazer, and a tie. I tried to politely inquire why my mother felt I needed dress clothing, but she dodged by saying I had outgrown what I already have. Curious…

My parents were surprised by their gifts, but they seemed happy. It must have been obvious that I had help, because Mom asked me how I chose the presents. Dad was easy, since he's been talking about a soccer team lately; I simply bought him tickets so we could watch a match together. I told Mom that Eimi-san helped me with her gift. She said she was very touched that I thought of them so much. It seems to have made them both happy, and I'm glad it went over well.

Usually New Year's is a quiet time for me, apart from the shrine visit. I've never participated in New Year's cleaning, attended a bonenkai party, or visited a shrine with someone other than my parents before. I typically program all break long, either in my room or at the kotatsu in the living room, eating clementines.

There's a first time for everything, I suppose. Mom volunteered me to help her clean Eimi-san's apartment, where she lives with her elderly grandmother. I can't say I was pleased, but it wasn't as onerous as I feared. I didn't expect Eimi-san to be so cheerful while cleaning, or to have so much to teach me about it. In fact, I felt rather humbled. I had no idea so much work went into keeping things tidy and hygienic in a home. I thought I appreciated all my mother does for me, but I didn't know the true scope of it. I should find a way to assist her at home.

The party was fairly standard fare for our group, with the addition of some traditional foods. Mimi-san and her mother have an… unusual way of cooking. Thankfully everything unorthodox was offered on the side. As much as I enjoy strawberries, I feel no desire to eat them with soba. Taichi-san seemed to find the options hilarious, and he spent a long time trading food opinions with Mimi-san and daring Yamato-san and Sora-san to eat over-the-top combinations. It would seem that Taichi-san is capable of consuming anything. I wonder what he eats at home? Jyou-san looked a bit ill just from watching him.

Speaking of my friends, my mother insisted that I send them personal cards. She always handles the New Year's cards, addressing them to my father's coworkers and her friends from the family. This year, I wrote and sent my own cards to everyone. At first I thought it was unnecessary, but she was correct; except for Eimi-san, who probably wasn't told about the cards, I received one from everyone. Even Taichi-san sent one, although I've seen his handwriting, and it isn't legible. I'm tempted to suspect that his sister sent them for him.

We visited the nearest Shinto shrine on New Year's Day, as usual, but in the company of Eimi-san and her grandmother. Although I didn't give it any thought beforehand, I was surprised to see Eimi-san wearing a kimono and makeup. Personally, I never understood the fuss over kimonos; they seem impractical and uncomfortable to wear. But I suppose she looked… I'm not sure what adjective the next boy would attribute to her. But I can't recall experiencing a particular urge to look at her in the past, and I'm at a loss to identify what has changed. Surely she looks the same as ever, save for her clothing.

Eimi-san has never visited a shrine, so I tried to explain things to her. But my parents seemed excited by the presence of more people in our group, and they taught her things, too. I suppose our unit has always consisted of the three of us, since my parents lack close family of their own, and I never had friends over in the past. I'm not sure what I think of welcoming more people into family functions.

I'm not interested in prayers and asking favors of the gods, but as always, I prayed for the safety of my family and for the peaceful rest of my biological parents. Mom always purchases an ema for me, and I write the same wish there. However, this year I saw Eimi-san frowning at her ema, then scribbling something down when my mother called her. I probably shouldn't have done this, but I couldn't help wondering what she wished for. I ensured that no one was watching and read her ema. It said, "Health and happiness for Koushiro-kun, my friends, and Grandma."

I don't understand. Didn't her grandmother explain that this was her chance to make a request of the gods for the year? I've never asked for anything for myself, but I only follow the religion on the surface once per year, so it only seems fair. I suppose Eimi-san might have similar reservations, as Shintoism isn't widely practiced in the states, but even so… Why did she specify me, independently of our friends?

It's embarrassing to admit this, even to paper, but her ema made me feel… I'm not sure there's an adequate word for it. Touched? Cared for? At the risk of sounding conceited, each time I encounter Eimi-san, her attachment to me grows more evident. I can't comprehend it; all I've been able to do thus far is observe. What have I done to encourage a particular regard? I know her well enough to guess that her feelings cannot be engaged on a whim.

For the first time, I made a wish for myself. My ema reads: "Improved relationships with friends and family." An ema is too small and public to expound further than that, but I want to be worthy of the people who care about me, despite my antisocial tendencies. I especially want to show my appreciation for the devotion of my parents and Eimi-san. I'm not sure I'll be able to reciprocate to their degree; they are naturally warmer, more loving people than I.

Of course, it's more of a resolution than a wish, and it's easier proposed than achieved. But I decided to begin with a small gesture. Since Eimi-san made no wishes for herself, I purchased a happiness charm for her, a second for my mother, and a traffic safety charm for my father, since he commutes daily. Besides, a happiness charm specifically for him seemed superfluous; while he has his own cares and hopes, he is happy when my mother and I are happy.

I never considered this before, but I wonder if my happiness will ever stem from someone else someday? I've always felt my best while working on my computer or learning something new. I always assumed that I will live alone someday, but… Would that be as desirable as I always expected?

But that is too far in the future to worry about now. I believe New Year's TV specials are still showing, and my parents enjoy them. I'll watch one or two with them.

**16/01/09**

**Saturday**

**Tachikawa Mimi**

Dear Diary,

I almost forgot how important the new year is in Japan! In the states, people mostly drink on New Year's Eve and buy a gym membership that they use for two weeks, and that's the end of it. Here everything shuts down for three days, and we have special traditions and TV shows and stuff. I missed it!

I was a little bored this break because Sora-chan was so busy, but I spent time with other friends, especially ones from elementary school. But things got realllly interesting when Sora-chan went on a date! On Christmas Eve! So bold! I'm so freaking proud of her. And naturally, I decided to have a New Year's Eve party instead of a Christmas Eve one.

She looked sooooo amazing when I was done with her. If Yamato-kun didn't topple head over heels for her, then he doesn't have a pulse! I took her picture before I left. Maybe I should send it to him as a souvenir? ;)

It sounds like they had a good time. Sora-chan doesn't gush as much as I do, but she was still pretty chatty. I think she has it pretty bad for him. Yamato-kun's a nice guy, and he's wrapped around her little finger, so I don't suspect him. But I swear, if he hurts her, I will _end_ him.

I haven't been on a date in a long time... I almost feel a little jealous. And I've never looked at someone the way Sora-chan looks at Yamato-kun. I used to date a lot, but then boys started talking about doing things with me that did _not _happen, thank you, and people started talking trash about me. I was like, "screw this!" because none of those boys were worth taking crap for.

People don't date as much in Japan, not in high school. So even though I'm older, the environment is so much stricter and less open. My parents would let me do whatever I want, but I guess... Well, some of the charm is gone after what happened in the states.

I know Jyou-kun would take me out without saying anything bad about me, but... I don't want to string him along. Still, I really hate how he seems to be pulling back from me lately. It's so frustrating, because I want his attention, but I don't know if I want to act on it. I don't even know what I'm thinking sometimes! It's so dumb.

Anyway, my parents love celebrating, so we went to a big shrine on Tokyo mainland on New Year's Day. It was soooo crowded, which made it hard to move in a kimono. But the shrine is famous for its charms for students, and... Well, I bombed our last exams, and I haven't been brave enough to tell my parents yet. I picked up charms for studies for everyone. I wish I could buy a thousand of them and never have to take a test again! Japanese tests are so hard... I just want to enjoy my youth!

Usually I pray for a fun, exciting year. And, well, I still did! But I also prayed to be a little more mature, like Sora-chan, and that everyone would be safe. Are you allowed that many prayers? I forget the rules after being away.

Oh, I had a great party on New Year's Eve with my friends! Mama cooked for us, and it was so fun to play with everyone. Taichi-kun ate until he nearly puked, Yamato-kun and Eimi-chan sang for us, Sora-chan smiled the whole time, and Koushiro-kun kicked our butts at a board game.

I only wish Jyou-kun had paid more attention to me. He wasn't mean, but he wasn't as attentive as usual. What's up with him? I don't like it. I mean- I'm not saying I expect anything from him, but... I don't want to become less close.

Ah, I'm getting a call from a friend. Bye!

XOXO,

Mimi

**16/01/10**

**Sunday**

**Ishida Yamato**

Sora picked Christmas Eve for our date. I couldn't believe it, but obviously I was happy about it. It was brave of her to put herself out there like that, and it made me feel a lot more comfortable. It was like tacit permission to treat her more like a girlfriend.

Naturally Takeru decided he had to see me off, so he showed up and tried to help me pick my clothes. Obviously that wasn't happening; I don't need to show up looking like a hipster or like I came from a break dancing class. Why is he so all over the place?

At least Dad was at work when I left. He's already been smirking at me and dropping random bits of advice. I'd be annoyed, except that I can tell he's happy for me. Same deal with Takeru, but it's hard to stay as patient with him when he followed me out of the apartment shouting advice. He's still in middle school, what the hell am I going to do with that kid…

I stopped by her place to pick her up, and God, I hope I didn't gape at her like an ass when she opened the door. She looked _incredible_ in a dark red dress, with her hair and makeup done. She had cat's eye eyeliner with a smoky effect around it. The result was mesmerizing, although I don't know how much to attribute to the makeup and how much of it was just her. Mimi sent me a picture of her later, and I was equal parts embarrassed, grateful, and pleased. Sora obviously asked Mimi to help her get ready for our date, and that means she was serious about it.

Things got a little easier when we were in our private karaoke room. Sora has a beautiful voice, but she doesn't know any technique, so we started with breath support. I might have abused the situation a bit to move in close, feeling for diaphragm movement. She was wearing some kind of fruity and floral perfume, and it was hard to focus on teaching her with her being so close. I think she enjoyed it, and she definitely improved, even in that short space. Breathing is everything when it comes to singing.

I spent a lot of time with Takeru in between Christmas and New Year's, and I also hung out with my band mates. We worked on composing a new song, and I also met up with Koushiro to talk about our recordings. It's crazy how good he is at anything remotely tech-oriented. He said he's never done it before, and I thought I must be imposing on him, but he kept saying that he enjoyed learning something new. Still, I should think of a way to repay him when the recordings are done. I guess I'll ask Eimi about what I should do for him?

Mimi had a party on New Year's Eve. I brought a karaoke machine that Dad dug out of his closet. It's easy to forget that he's musical. Hell, he plays a six string better than I can, or at least he could at some point. Probably rusty now… Anyway, we had another little singing show, and Sora was able to share what she learned. I was blessing Mimi and Eimi for saying that her singing improved.

I invited Sora to watch the first sunrise of the new year with me at the end of our date. I tried to make a comfortable spot on the roof of my building for us. I brought blankets and cushions, and I plugged a space heater into the outlet on the outside wall around the stairs. It was too cold to play my bass- my fingers would have gone stiff- but I played my harmonica for Sora, since she asked to hear it a while ago.

She huddled into me, and I wrapped the blankets around us. It was surprisingly warm in our cocoon, and she relaxed against me. We were quiet for a long time, and I couldn't believe how content I can feel just because she's there. I guess that's how the words slipped out on their own: "Sora? I hope we can spend a lot of time together this year."

Her head rose from my shoulder, and a small smile lifted the corners of her mouth. Her eyes were so warm, and I moved closer without thinking, like a cold man drawn to a hearth. Then her hand closed around mine and squeezed, and I felt her little fingertips brush my palms, and my pulse started thrumming in my head, working like a fast bassline. The pinks and reds of the sunrise tinted her hair and her skin, and everything felt unreal, and suddenly I was so close to her, and she closed her eyes, and her hand tightened around mine, and then we were kissing, and my memory is a little blurry from there.

I wish I could describe it, but… I guess it was like being walloped in the nervous system. Everything went into overdrive: nerves thrummed and sang like guitar strings, everything blazed and sizzled, and there was a sweeping sensation in my gut that shot straight up to my head. There was a faint strawberry flavor to her lip stain, and her taste... It was earthy and primal, or maybe that was just my own instincts rising.

Eventually my head stopped spinning long enough to realize that we couldn't keep going like that, not on top of the roof, and we drew apart. I felt myself smiling like an idiot, and she giggled, and she looked so damned happy that I had to laugh, too. We rested our foreheads together and sat like that for a minute, and I was just trying to digest everything and stop grinning.

It was tough to split up, even though we both had family obligations all day. And getting into a kimono takes some work, so even though it was early, Sora had to get back home. I'm starting to sense how hard it will be to balance myself as a member of my family, as a student, a Teenage Wolf, and as a boyfriend. Right now, my brain is so full of her, and I needed to be on my toes to meet up with my family- my _whole_ family.

So we kissed one more time, just a soft, warm touch, and I walked her home, even though she argued that she was perfectly capable of walking back on her own. I shrugged and said, "It's for me," and her mouth snapped shut, and I wish I could have taken a picture of her blushing.

A few hours later, Dad and I met Takeru and Mom at a shrine. It was awkward at first, especially between my parents, but Takeru worked so hard to act as a bridge between them. Although I think he understands that our family will never be what it was, Takeru is desperate for us all to get along, so I tried my best. I asked Mom about her work, talked about my band, and begrudgingly let her ask about Sora. Dad didn't say much, and he faltered a little when he couldn't avoid talking, but he smiled more than he usually does. It wasn't perfect, but it's an improvement.

I don't really believe in gods, but I also don't want to waste opportunities, or to offend anyone. And honestly, I feel like I've never had more to pray for. I always pray for Takeru's safety and happiness, and for my father's. This year I added my mother's and Sora's, and I asked for my band to be successful. I have no idea if that's too much.

Either way, I'm not relying on the gods alone. This year, I'm going to try to look beyond myself and my family more. I know we grow as people by interacting with the world, and I always prefer to pull back and look inward. That won't help me connect with Sora or mature into someone who deserves her.

I began this year with Sora and my family, and the next day I met up with my band to wish everyone a happy new year and to work on our songs. I hope I set the tone for the rest of the year.

**Author's Notes:** Hey all! I'm continuing my tradition of celebrating my birthday in the style of hobbits. That is, I'm giving gifts to you, my readers: words! Happy hobbit birthday! XD

Thanks for reading! I appreciate you reading and reviewing to tell me what you think. Have a good one!


	21. January 3

**Voices**

January 3: 18th-24th

**16/01/18**

**Monday**

**Tachikawa Mimi**

Dear Diary,

Ugghhh, I want to _cryyyy_. This is all _so_ dumb!

So remember how I bombed my exams? Well, the school contacted Mama and Papa, and we all went to meet with my homeroom teacher and the councilor. They said that I was in danger of failing the year and having to take remedial classes, or even being held back if those don't help!

My parents wanted to get me a tutor or put me in cram school, but I can't! I just can't! My whole life is school school school, I can't go to _more_ school afterward! But for once they wouldn't let me have my way, so I said the first thing that came to my mind: what if I study with Jyou-kun, Eimi-chan, and Koushiro-kun on the weekend, and get extra tutoring from Jyou-kun? I was sure he would do it, and if I really have to be tutored, at least it's by a friend, so it won't be as boring.

They said we could try that first, so today I asked my friends about it. Everyone was fine with my joining study sessions, but Jyou-kun got all uncomfortable when I asked about private tutoring. He didn't want to do it, can you believe it?! But I kept wearing him down, and finally he said we could try it, but he needs enough time to study on his own, so it might not work out.

I just have to make sure it works out somehow, then. I don't want to be stuck with some strict person I don't know! At least I can have fun teasing Jyou-kun. It's something, right? Besides, he's in the same class as me, so he'll be more familiar with the material than someone who learned it a while ago.

I want to call my friends and talk about this, but of course I have to study… This is the _worst_! There's more to life than grades, you know?! They can't prove how good or bad I'll be at a job when I'm an adult.

XOXOXO,

Mimi

**16/01/19**

**Tuesday**

**Ishida Yamato**

Koushiro finished tweaking our recordings, and they sound amazing. Takeru put them on the blog he runs for The Teenage Wolves, and people are asking for CDs. Seems like Sora knew what she was talking about. So I'm looking for someone to design the cover and the disc. In the meantime, the band is having heated discussions about song order on the CD, even though there are only four tracks.

I want to ask Sora on another date, but now that the holiday season is over, our routines are growing busy again. Plus, I think our parents were being a bit indulgent about it over the breaks. But I guess it's alright, since I can see her in class and during lunch. We decided to take it slow and win our parents over with patience. Besides, I get the sense that Sora's mother is trying to protect her, and that Dad is doing the same with me. I always think we're being discrete, but our parents know us. It's easy to worry about your kid being broken hearted because some other kid was playing with them. They'll come around.

We're keeping it quiet at school. It's no one's business anyway, but I've heard there's an… ugh. There's apparently a fan club for me. See, I'd like one for the band, but me personally? No thanks. Anyway, I don't want any of those girls giving Sora a hard time.

Ah, Aki's calling me. It's probably about lyrics again…

**January 20th, 2016**

**Wednesday**

**Anami Eimi**

Dear Kitty,

So our recordings are up on our site. I can't believe Koushiro-kun mixed them all by himself. He really can do anything, can't he? He's so admirable, and he acts like it's no big deal. I complimented him, and he blinked and said, "It was an interesting task. I enjoyed learning something new."

But he must have listened to my song a lot to work on it… When I think about that, I feel a little nervous. He really made it sound nice. I avoided listening to it for a while, since I was so worked up about it at the time. But I finally forced myself to, since he put time and effort into it, and… Did I have to sing it so earnestly? No wonder people teased me…

I've been looking into the next competition or performance for us. In the meantime, we've been working on new songs. Or at least, we try to. Lately the boys have been arguing about the track list for our CD. Does that even matter when our set list is so short? Sometimes I don't understand them.

I've been worrying about Jyou-kun lately. He seems down, and I don't know why. He did well on his exams, so I thought he'd be happy, or at least relieved. But sometimes he looks so sad and worn. I tried to talk to him, but he didn't want to go there. Maybe Sora-chan might have a guess? Koushiro-kun sure didn't. And Taichi-kun has been down, too, but I think I know why. It's about Sora-chan, right? Could Jyou-kun be sad about Mimi-chan? But it's not like she's dating anyone… Man, puberty is stomping all over our group. Er, I mean Eros. Cupid. Whatever. People say they're the same god, but they aren't accounting for Hesiod's _Theogony_, which-

Wow. See, usually someone else stops me around here. I guess you're defenseless, Kitty. Moving on.

Oh, so I fell at the very top of the stairs today. I would have been in big trouble if Taichi-kun wasn't walking up the stairs. He grabbed me before my head hit anything, and I think I only stumbled down three or four steps. I'm fine, but… I didn't fall on my own. At first I thought someone must have bumped into me by accident at the top of the stairs, but the more I think about it, the more I wonder if someone could have pushed so hard without meaning to.

I know that sounds crazy, but I still have that note telling me to stay away from Yamato… I hate to bring it up, but maybe I should consider it… It's probably nothing, though. I mean, seriously, people don't need to intimidate me _that_ badly, yeah? And anyway, do they have the wrong idea! Yamato's with Sora-chan, but they don't want us telling other people about it. It's not a secret, per se, but they're just private.

Ah, I'm getting a text from Mimi-chan about our English homework, gotta go!

Yours,

Eimi

**16.01.21**

**Thursday**

**Kido Jyou**

Am I cursed? I must be cursed. Is this karma? I try my best, universe. Give me a break, would you?

Alright. Just when I decided to try to get over Mimi-chan, she asked me to tutor her. I tried to turn her down, I really did. I mean, to be honest, I need to focus on my own grades. I'm not doing quite as well as I'd like, and time is already stretched thin with cram school, group studying, homework, and medical club.

But… I guess I also thought about what I decided over the new year. You know, how I might be missing out on things by obsessing over my grades. Ah, hell, who am I kidding. It's those damned eyes of hers. She just, I don't know, they get all big and sparkly, and that's it for me. Besides, I'd hate for her to be held back. Nothing should hold down someone like her.

So now I'm tutoring Mimi-chan. Great. You know, two weeks ago I would have given myself whiplash saying yes, but now I'm on edge about it. I just… At first I told myself I'd never be able to date Mimi-chan, so I admired her in a detached kind of way. But somewhere along the line I started thinking that maybe there was something there, like an idiot, and now I've gone and gotten my hopes up.

When will I learn that it's never a good idea to get my hopes up?

I need to try to relax. Stress makes people more susceptible to sickness, and there's a nasty flu going around.

**16/01/22**

**Friday**

**Takenouchi Sora**

Yamato's making CDs after all. Their recordings sound great, and I hope they make a lot of money. I wonder what they would buy with it? Things like amps and other equipment, maybe? You should see the website Takeru-kun made for The Teenage Wolves. They're such a cute pair. Neither of them would say it, but Takeru-kun looks up to Yamato so much, and I think Yamato would do anything to protect him and keep him happy. It makes me wish I had a sibling. Maybe then there wouldn't be so much pressure at home for me with the Takenouchi school situation. But I shouldn't complain, since things have improved so much with Mom recently.

She started acting a little strange with Yamato, though. At first she didn't seem to mind that we're dating, but now she's worried about it. I know it probably has to do with protecting me, but I wish she'd trust my judgment. Thankfully, Yamato is understanding about it. He recommended soothing her by going along with her wishes for now. I would really like to go out with him some more, though… Hopefully she'll understand soon that he's not going to hurt me.

I'm so worried about Mimi-chan. She didn't do well on her exams, and she's in danger of remedial classes at best and being held back a year at worst if they don't improve. So she went to Jyou-kun to ask for tutoring, and now I'm worried about him, too. I tried to remind Mimi-chan about his feelings for her, but she's so upset about her own situation that I don't think it got through to her. I was too gentle about it, because I don't want to push right now. What's the best thing to do?

Actually, a few of us seem pretty low right now… Even Taichi-kun seems to have lost his pep, and Eimi-chan seems kind of nervous sometimes? Naturally, they both say they're fine. I want to ask why everyone does that, but I've done it, too. I just hope they open up to someone soon.

Normally Mimi-chan and Taichi-kun pull us up when we're low. Where does that leave us if they're both down? I wonder if I could help somehow…

**16.01.23**

**Saturday**

**Izumi Koushiro**

I'm grateful that the holidays are over, and the standard routine has returned. I don't have to concern myself with any holiday preparations or activities for a while. Homework and computer club are my only obligations.

I completed the recordings for The Teenage Wolves. I'm glad that Yamato-san and his band seem to like them. I was offered a percentage of their CD sale profits. I tried to turn Yamato-san down, but he pushed his point. I capitulated in the end. I suppose it's fair to be paid for my work, although I wasn't expecting it. I should purchase a copy for my parents.

Mimi-san joined our study session today. It was a bit distracting, since she had so many questions, but I was surprised to find that I enjoyed teaching her. I had to try several angles for most topics until she understood. It's fascinating how our brains accept some explanations readily and reject others. The approaches I've developed for Eimi-san and Jyou-san differ, and I'm working on methods to reach Mimi-san.

I hope I can be of assistance. Apparently she is in somewhat dire need of improved marks. I'd hate to see her intellectually stagnate for a year. It would drive me mad to learn the same material a second time.

**16/01/24**

**Sunday**

**Yagami Taichi**

Damn, yesterday was crazy. I got a call from Hikari while I was hanging out at school after practice. She was with Takeru at the middle school, and he was barfing and burning up. The school nurse had already gone home for the day, his mom was at work, and apparently Yamato wasn't picking up (band practice was too loud, I guess?). The middle school is right next to our high school- most kids graduate from one to the other- so I ran over there.

They were in an empty classroom, and the kid was all flushed and doubled over a trashcan. He looked kind of drunk. I asked why the hell he went to school like that, but he said he didn't feel that sick in the morning. I couldn't leave him like that, but of course none of us had any money for a cab. I found a walk-in clinic with my phone within walking distance, so Hikari grabbed the trash liner, I hauled the kid onto my back, and we hoofed it. There were three puke breaks in a ten minute walk.

Hikari and I sat in the waiting room while Takeru saw a doctor. His phone went off while he was back there. Yamato was pretty frantic on the other end, so I explained everything to him, and he showed up like five minutes later gasping like a fish out of water. Man, dude can _book_ it.

I figured we should head out, but Hikari didn't want to leave until Takeru came back. It turns out he has the flu that's been going around, but he'll be fine with medicine and rest. The last thing I need is for Hikari to get sick, so we made sure Yamato had a ride, then we got out of there. I stopped and used Dad's emergency credit card for some immune system supplements.

So that was not really what I expected to happen yesterday. I'm glad Takeru's alright. Yamato kind of freaked out over it, but I guess I get it. He must have felt pretty bad about not answering his brother's call.

I really hope Hikari doesn't get sick. Her immune system isn't the greatest, and she was with him longer than I was. She's too nice for her own good…

**Author's Notes: **There you have it. Thanks for reading! See you next week. Er, this week?


	22. January 4

**Voices**

January 4: 25th-31st

**January 25, 2016**

**Monday**

**Anami Eimi**

Dear Kitty,

It's official: my life is an anime.

I went to my cubby in the genkan after band practice, and my street shoes were gone. Instead, I found a note saying, "Come to the roof." I've seen enough anime to know that this was a Bad Thing. (And seriously, why is my life suddenly taking cues from cartoons?!).

Well, I didn't want to go home in my school slippers, so I climbed up the stairs and opened the door to the roof. And, as I expected, girls from the unofficial Yamato Fan Club were there, leaning against the fence around the perimeter of the roof near the door. I left the door partially open, hoping I could call for help if I had to. Then I met them at the fence.

There were four girls there, and my shoes were between their feet on the ground. Three were from other classes in the first year. I know them all, but I've only spoken with my classmate, Watanabe Aiko. She stepped forward and said, "We _told_ you to stay away from Ishida-san."

I had to swallow a laugh. The girls are between 4'10" and 5'3," and they're petite all around. No matter how much they glare or how scary they try to make their flute-like voices, they just aren't intimidating. I guess that's why I smiled and said, "Kind of hard to avoid him when we're in the same club."

And Watanabe-kun _stamped her foot _like a five-year-old, and gods help me, I started laughing. She flushed and said, "We all asked to be his manager, and he said he didn't need one! Then he picked _you_!"

"So take it up with him," I said, shrugging.

I think that pissed them off. They started to make some vague threats, "or else" kind of things, and I lost my patience. "Look, have you thought this through?" I asked. "What are you going to do? First of all, I'm so much bigger than you. Do you really want to try to fight me? And anyway, if you hurt me over this, people will find out. Literally _everyone_ outside of your fan club is going to think less of you. If you want to be closer to Yamato, the only thing stopping you is _you_. Here's what you should do, okay? The love letters creep him out. Just _talk_ to him if you want to be friends with him. Stop threatening his female friends. And while you're at it, he would hate a fan club for himself, but he would _love_ a Teenage Wolves fan club. Change the focus of your club a little, support the boys as a band, show up to our next concert. I'll give you advance notice for our gigs so you get first dibs at tickets."

They glanced at each other, looking a bit nervous. I don't think I was intimidating, but… I kind of think they expected me to just roll over and take whatever they dished. Can you imagine? Anyway, I grabbed my shoes and turned around to leave. I heard them following me, but suddenly the door to the roof was thrown all the way open, and Taichi was standing there with his cell phone held out.

"Smile, ladies!" he said. "I got that whole conversation on camera. I bet Yamato would _love_ to see you threatening his manager. The teachers would probably like it, too!"

I've never been more shocked! He was grinning so hard, and suddenly, I was bent over at the waist and laughing until my eyes watered. I could hardly hear the girls clamoring at him, some threatening, some begging. "See, you _know_ you're being shitty," Taichi cried, talking over them. "If you were doing the right thing, it wouldn't matter if I showed off this video. So Eimi, what should I do with it?"

"Take it home," I said. "Save it to your computer. Keep it as leverage."

"Ahhh." I swear, no one grins quite like Taichi. He waggled an eyebrow and said, "If things end here, no one else has to know about this. But if you guys bully anyone else, then I'll have Takeru upload this straight to the Teenage Wolves's blog. Your choice!"

And _that_, Kitty, is how you handle crazy fangirls! Thank goodness Taichi noticed me in the genkan. He said he's been keeping an eye out when he can ever since I tripped down the stairs. While I was thanking him, he insisted that I stop using honorifics, which is nice. I guess it's easier for me, since I didn't use them growing up. The video was a great idea. I watched it, and you really can see their faces and hear what they're saying, so hopefully it will keep everyone in line. I'm so touched that he was looking out for me.

I think we both did great, and hopefully this is the end of the bullying for everyone. It's great that we found a solution before anyone found out that Sora-chan and Yamato are together.

Yours,

Eimi

**16/01/26**

**Tuesday**

**Takenouchi Sora**

Since my friends seem sad lately, I decided to throw a surprise party. I can't let Mimi-chan and Taichi know, since it's for them most of all, so I asked Yamato to help. He offered to make a hot pot, but he can only carry so much. I knew I needed more help.

I decided to ask Eimi-chan and Koushiro-kun, since Jyou-kun seems to have his hands full with cram school. Eimi-chan is making us a cake, and Koushiro-kun suggested having the party at his apartment. I thought it would be an imposition, but he said his mother often tells him that his friends are always welcome. When he asked her about it, she even volunteered to cook! She must be very kind.

So Yamato switched to bringing his karaoke machine and some board games, and I'm bringing snacks and soda. I think we're all set for this Sunday! Koushiro-kun said he'll have the weekly group study session at his house, so that Mimi-chan and Jyou-kun will be there already. I'll have to think of a way to bring Taichi.

Speaking of, Taichi told me about what happened between Eimi-chan and some of Yamato's fans. He even had a video! I'm so glad he followed Eimi-chan and backed her up. She handled it well, but who knows how it might have escalated? The video should prevent them from bullying anyone else.

It would have been so easy for Eimi-chan to say that I'm with Yamato. She never would have been targeted again. But she didn't mention me at all, and she even gave her bullies good advice. I'm so impressed with her, and with Taichi, too.

I'm so happy to be surrounded by people like my friends.

**16.01.27**

**Wednesday**

**Izumi Koushiro**

Somehow my club mates discovered that I mixed the recordings for The Teenage Wolves. Several members expressed an interest in learning about the program I used, and although I'm no expert, I'm suddenly in charge of another presentation. It's a bit troublesome to prep for, especially since I'll have to research the program more thoroughly, but... I admit that I enjoy teaching and being helpful to the club.

Our president announced a computer club outing today. I've never attended them in the past, but he specifically asked me to come after the meeting, since the outing is related to my presentation. Once I confirmed that I am willing to give my talk, our secretary contacted a recording studio requesting a tour so our members can see the equipment involved in the recording process. I'm not sure how interested I am. I like equipment, but I'm more interested in manipulating recorded sounds than in the recording process.

I mentioned it to Eimi-san as we walked home, and without really intending to, I found myself asking for advice. She said that I shouldn't feel pressured to attend, but it might be fun to see what the outings are like. She kept asking questions about it, and I realized that she was interested in the tour. I should have anticipated that.

I asked her if she'd like to come. The answer was obviously yes, but she hedged. Eventually I put together that she didn't want to go without me, since she is not friends with anyone else in my club. I suppose it's somewhat comparable to my situation with sales clerks.

I don't think I've ever contributed to someone's comfort before. I doubt it generally makes a difference to my classmates if I attend events or not, since I offer so little socially. I think the desire for my presence would have annoyed me in the past, or at least pressured me. But now... I wonder what changed, exactly? I told her that I would attend with her.

And the theme continues from there. When Sora-san approached us about help for her party, I recalled my mother's fondness for visitors and company. I asked her if she would be willing to host, and she seemed excited about it.

I suppose it will be a busy weekend. I hope I'll find some time to work independently. Despite my increased willingness to engage in social events, I still require time to myself. Hopefully I can fine some without staying up too late.

**16/01/28**

**Thursday**

**Tachikawa Mimi**

Dear Diary,

Ughhhh, I'm so stressed out! I want to play, but I've been studying with Jyou-kun in the evenings, and I spent a few hours last Sunday with him, Eimi-chan, and Koushiro-kun.

I hate studying, but it _is_ better with other people, and Jyou-kun and Koushiro-kun are really good teachers. They're so patient. They don't make me feel dumb or get annoyed if I don't get it. You know how teachers pretty much show you one way to do something and move on? The boys keep trying different things until I get it.

I'm already starting to do my homework faster, and I even follow lessons a little better. I'm not sure if it's their teaching, or if I'm just... Maybe learning how to focus more? I always thought moving around and being active was interesting, and being still and quiet was boring and lazy, but you should see the way the three of them focus. It's crazy!

I asked Eimi-chan how she studies for so long, and she said that you have to... What was it? "Work with a goal and remove distractions." She asked if I end up doing other things when I'm supposed to be doing homework or listening to the teacher. I said that it's mostly my phone. I'll get a text or a call, or I'll check social media, and then two hours have passed. It happens in class, too.

So now when I work, I always start by writing what I want to do (finish homework, memorize notes), and I leave my phone in another room. Then I know what I have to do and when I'm finished, and I don't get sidetracked.

Everyone is helping so much, but I feel so tired and stressed out. I'm not made for this, you know? I'm sorry I looked down on them a little for being nerds. It's a lot harder than it looks! They have so much discipline and concentration...

I really want to go play this weekend, but there's more studying to do. I feel like it will never end! Will I even survive to the end of the school year? It won't matter what my grades are if my brain pops!

Ughhh, I have to go memorize some science stuff.

XOXOXO,

Mimi

**16/01/29**

**Friday**

**Ishida Yamato**

Takeru is doing better every day. He has the flu, but he's not contagious anymore, and he started going to school again a few days ago. He was pretty miffed about wearing a facemask, as if anyone will notice that when he's wearing a purple fedora.

I spent Saturday night and Sunday at Mom's place, taking care of him while she caught up on her editing. She cooked dinner for us each night. I thought I had forgotten how her food tastes, but one bite brought it all flooding back. We're still a little stiff around each other, but it's getting better.

I couldn't hear my phone over my band playing when Takeru called me from his school on Saturday, but Hikari-chan was with him, and she called Taichi. I wish he had found me before he went to the middle school, but I guess I know how it is when a sibling calls for help. He carried Takeru to the doctor on his back, and apparently Takeru threw up a few times on the way.

I thanked Taichi, but I feel a little awkward about it. I'm indebted to him, which is weird after all of the strain between us earlier in the year. I've been trying to talk to him more. I don't have any issues with him now, so there's no reason to keep my distance.

Speaking of, suddenly I'm not getting any more love letters. It's been a relief. Watanabe Aiko approached me about starting a Teenage Wolves fan club (not as an actual school club, obviously), and I wonder if that's related to the love letters? Maybe they decided to stop sending them as a unit. I talked the club idea over with the others and gave her the go-ahead. Eimi is already coordinating with her about our upcoming appearances.

It's great for us to have an audience on standby for our gigs, but I wonder how this all came together so suddenly. Something about Eimi's smiles and tone tells me that she knows more than I do, but when I hint at questions, she becomes selectively mute. It's a little annoying, but… I trust her, so if she's not upset, it's fine.

Sora's having a party tomorrow for all of us, although it seems to especially be for Mimi, Jyou, and Taichi. She's always impressing me. I never would have thought of doing something like that if my friends were down, although I wonder if it's the best choice for Jyou. I already suspected as much, but it's great to know that the person you're with is so supportive.

My dad is already easing up on worrying about Sora potentially using me or hurting me. I knew she'd win him over right away. Now I just have to do the same with Sora's mom, and hopefully we'll be going out together soon. It's easier said than done, though. She's a tough lady, but we'll get there. If I can spend a weekend around my mom, then I can handle Sora's, right?

**16/01/30**

**Saturday**

**Yagami Taichi**

Hikari and I haven't gotten sick, and Yamato told me Takeru's getting better, so that's a relief. The last thing we need is to be out of commission for the end of the school year. My team is prepping for next year's tournaments, y'know? No time to lose. And obviously there is no good time for Hikari to be sick.

I've been kind of surprised lately because Yamato's been talking to me. He snapped and got all hissy in the beginning of the year, and then we sort of tolerated each other, but I guess it's been getting better. That's good, since we have a lot of the same friends. And it's not like I ever hated him. He just got so smug and pissy around me, and I could never figure out why.

But getting along suits me a lot better, so whatever. Water under the bridge.

I thought I was being a little paranoid, but I've been keeping an eye on Eimi lately. I dunno, she's just been acting kind of skittish. I've helped her with enough gym stuff to know that she's clumsy, but it's been ridiculous these last few days. I don't know, I can't put a finger on it, but I guess when Hikari seems a little weird, I look into it. Same deal for my friends.

Luckily soccer practice ended around the same time as band practice, and I saw her staring at a note in the genkan. She went back into the school, which was weird when she was about to leave. I saw that her shoes were gone and decided to follow her. I almost lost her in the time it took to change from shoes to slippers, but luckily a teammate saw her and told me which way to go.

When he said she was going up to the roof, I figured we had trouble. The door to the roof was open, and I wanted to go through, but I figured I should listen first. It was a bunch of crazy Yamato fangirls making stupid "leave him alone or else" threats. What the hell does "or else" mean, anyway? Only that you have no clue what you're doing.

If boys were bugging her, I could have intimidated them or fought them. That's not an option with girls, and I was starting to think I couldn't help when I realized that I had _exactly_ what I needed in my gym bag. They want Yamato to like them, and he won't if he knows that they're being shitty to Eimi. So I pulled my phone out, inched my phone past the door, and shot a video.

When Eimi told the girls to kiss her ass and started leaving, they started following her. I opened the door and stepped around Eimi, so she was behind me. It was pretty funny watching those girls turn colors when I told them about the video. Karma's a bitch sometimes!

I got a little carried away and said we should show it to Yamato, but Eimi said that no one has to see it if the girls stop bullying people. Damn, she's level headed. Now we can blackmail them into playing nice, and they'll never be able to go after anyone else. And that's awesome, especially since it should save Sora from dealing with this crap when it gets out that she's with Yamato.

Eimi was pretty damned cool, you know. Those girls wanted to intimidate her so much, but she was like, "Haha, bitch please." Only imagine that in a way that doesn't make the other person want to punch you. Somehow, it always comes out that way when I do it. What can I say?

Anyway, I think the League of Scary Yamato Fans is dead. Eimi told me they're re-branding themselves as The Teenage Wolves Fan Club, which I think will make everyone happier. Less drama, no worries about Sora, more ticket sales for the band.

Not bad, huh?

**16.01.31**

**Sunday**

**Kido Jyou**

I feel like I'm all over the place lately. I have so little time when I'm not at school, studying, or sleeping that I feel like I can't tell one day from the next. Working with Mimi-chan means I'm studying more than ever, and I feel like I'm reaching my limit.

But at the same time, I enjoy myself when she's with me. She asked me to teach her, so it's easier to talk to her than it used to be. I know what I'm supposed to be doing, and I feel more confident. And when I explain something to her, she sits so close to me. Her hair smells like fruit, and I think she wears some kind of floral and wood based perfume. At the risk of sounding creepy, she smells amazing.

And I can't help noticing that she keeps dressing up more and more when she comes over. The first few days, she wore her uniform, but now she's changing and doing her hair before she comes over. Does that mean anything? I don't know! I could ask Eimi-chan, but I doubt she'd have an answer.

Somehow, when Mimi-chan is around, it's less stressful to study. When Koushiro-kun and Eimi-chan are there too, we all end up talking and relaxing more. It seems like it would hurt productivity, but I think I work different parts of my brain explaining things to Mimi-chan than I do when I memorize. I end up seeing things differently and identifying areas I don't understand as well as I thought I did. Then I clear things up with a teacher. I think it's actually helpful to teach someone else.

And speaking of our study sessions being livlier... Somehow, today's turned into a surprise party. Mimi-chan was so happy when Sora-chan and the others showed up with cake, food, and games that she teared up and started hugging everyone.

I haven't seen her that happy since the New Year's party. It cut our study session in half, but it was nice.

**Author's Note: **It's February now, and you know what that means… Valentine's Day is approaching! That should be a pretty big deal for these kids. Stay tuned!


	23. February 1

**Voices**

February 1: 1st-7th

**16/02/01**

**Monday**

**Tachikawa Mimi**

Dear Diary,

I have the best friends in the world! They threw me a surprise party on Sunday because I've been so stressed out lately. We played card games, listened to music, hung out, and ate amazing food (Koushiro-kun's mom is an awesome cook!). I miss the states, where we had a big house and I could throw huge parties for all of my friends, but a small group is good if you have the right people. And there's no one like my Sora-chan and the others!

Also, Valentine's Day is coming up, and that means operation "Tease Everyone and Play Matchmaker" is _go_! I'm going to make sure Sora-chan's gift to Yamato-kun is a success, and so help me, I _will_ encourage my favorite little puppy girl to confess to Koushiro-kun! I taught her all about Valentine's Day in Japan so that she knows what she has to do. I'm a little worried, though. She's still pretending like she doesn't have a thing for him! It's _so_ frustrating! I'm doing what I can to push her along, but Sora-chan keeps telling me she has to take this at her own pace. But her pace is standing still, and when does that help anyone?!

I like the active role that girls play in Japanese Valentine's Day, but I'm a little sad that I'm not in the states now. I used to get so many presents on Valentine's Day, and I had my choice of boys to go on a date with, but now I have to _give_ the gifts. Well, I do like giving presents, but I'll miss the spotlight. Actually, I think the states suit me more in some ways. Maybe I'll try to go to college there… I don't know if Mama and Papa would like that, though. They want to be near me.

But for now, I'm here, so I'll make the best of it. I decided to tell my friends about American Valentine's Day over lunch. I hope it will give the boys ideas so we girls can get some love, too! Yamato-kun mentioned that Reverse Valentine's Day has popped up here over the last few years, so maybe there's hope!

I have to decide what to give everyone! There are so many choices, since the department stores make so many special items for the occasion. I have to pick the best things for my friends!

XOXOXO,

Mimi

**16/02/02**

**Tuesday**

**Ishida Yamato**

Sometimes I wish I were older, just so I'd have more experiences to write about. We're working on new songs, and mine are about love lately. I think my band mates are starting to suspect that I'm dating someone. It's not a problem if people know I'm with Sora, but... It's just kind of private. I'm still wrapping my head around it myself.

Speaking of, I'm looking into where I should take Sora next. I asked Mimi for advice, thinking that Sora might have mentioned something she'd like to do. Mimi listed the most expensive restaurants and activities in Tokyo, looking insanely pleased about it. Whoever dates her had better have an impressive bank account.

Eimi chose our next contest, and I'm talking to Sora about outfits for our performance. I really just wanted her help choosing clothes to buy, but she said she wants to make the clothes. I told her it would be a lot of work, but she insists. I've seen what she can do, and I'm excited, but the boys are a little wary. They'll come around when they see her work. I just hope she doesn't overexert herself...

I talked to Takeru's girlfriend about taking pictures of our band at the gig. I can't believe they've been dating almost the whole school year! I only got it out of Takeru because he was sick and clingy. I have no idea how he always stays a step ahead of me, despite being in middle school. I know I'm in over my head with him. But Hikari-chan's good for him, since she's so levelheaded and smart. Obviously they're just kids, but I hope he stays with her for a while. She'll do him good if he doesn't drive her insane.

Mom doesn't know (or at least he thinks she doesn't, so she probably does), so 'the talk' sort of fell to me. He's old enough to not need an explanation, so I focused more on protection, consequences, that kind of thing. I did what I could. It wasn't as awkward as I thought, but I'm not sure if it helped. He's so flippant, and it can be hard to tell when he's actually listening. I just hope they stay away from that stuff for a few years. They're so young, you know?

I'm counting on Hikari-chan to keep his ridiculous ass in line. I think she's got this.

I've been talking to Koushiro a lot more lately. I always thought he was nice enough, but kind of dull and hard to approach. Once you get him talking, though, he's actually pretty cool, and even a little funny. I can't believe how much he's already picked up about mixing music.

The computer club went to a recording studio, and Koushiro invited Eimi, who told the band about it (it's probably more accurate to say she made a report for us, which is very... Eimi). I want the band to go, too, so we can learn about recording our music. You can rent the studio, which is probably where our CD earnings will go. I'm waiting on the finalized art, and then the AV club will make them for us for a fee. We'll sell those CDs while we write enough music for a proper album, and then hopefully we'll have enough to rent the studio and record.

But first we have to be ready to win our next contest. We've been practicing harder than ever, going over our judge comments and recordings from our last contest and nailing all of our problem areas. This time, we'll be ready, and hopefully the fan club will come out to support us.

**February 3, 2016**

**Wednesday**

**Anami Eimi**

Dear Kitty,

We all had fun at Koushiro-kun's house on Saturday. Mimi-chan nearly hugged the stuffing out of me when I sat the cake on the table. She seems much more peppy lately, so hopefully she's feeling better.

Koushiro-kun invited me to join his club's outing last Sunday. I was a little surprised that he'd be willing to go at all, let alone invite me. I'm so glad he did, and I had a good time touring the recording studio. I saw a lot of interesting equipment, and I tried to take notes about things the band might find useful. Yamato wants to go see it with the band now, so I guess I may be going back.

But what really struck me was how much respect Koushiro-kun's club mates give him. I don't often see him interact with people outside of our group, but the computer club members obviously think highly of him. They kept directing attention to him and asking questions, and he was so patient and engaged… although sometimes he seemed a little edgy. I hate to admit this, but I was kind of jealous. When I first met him, I had to do research to be able to talk to him! But since the whole club is into computers, technology, and equipment, which Koushiro-kun is comfortable speaking about, they can all talk easily.

But I'm glad he's doing well in his club. And I felt like some of them were even close enough to Koushiro-kun to tease him, although they always stopped doing it when I was close enough to hear. I'm so curious! I wish I knew what they were talking about.

In other news, apparently Valentine's Day is a preeeeeetty big deal in Japan. You won't believe the ads everywhere, and there are even special events at the department stores! Yeesh! I asked Mimi-chan about it, and suddenly I found myself whisked away after school to be educated in the Art of the Japanese Valentine's Day Celebration, along with a bemused Sora-chan.

We went to a cafe, ordered sweets, and listened to Mimi-chan's lecture. She said that girls give chocolate in Japan, and there are three categories of gifts: honmei or true feeling chocolates for the boy you like, giri or obligation chocolates for your friends, relatives, and coworkers, and tomo or friend chocolates for your female friends.

And I was like, "Whoa, slow down! Back in the states, you buy a packet of cards and tape a piece of candy to each one and hand them out to your classroom. What is all this?!"

Mimi-chan sighed and crossed her arms. "Yeah. I'm really going to miss it. In America, I got so many presents on Valentine's Day... Now I have to figure out what to give all of our boys!"

We started chatting about who we need to cover. It was a nice conversation until Mimi-chan said, "So, Sora-chan, what are you giving Yamato-kun for your first Valentine's Day together? And what are you getting Koushiro-kun, Eimi-chan?"

Sora-chan said she's still thinking about it, so of course Mimi-chan zeroed in on me. I said I would probably bake chocolate chip cookies, since Izumi-san taught me that recently, and I don't think I can afford buying something for everyone. Mimi-chan said I need to give something special to Koushiro-kun for it to be honmei-choco.

I got embarrassed, and Mimi-chan kept pressing. "When you confess love in Japan, you can't be indirect like you can in the states. You have to give him the present and say it clearly: 'I like you' or 'I want to date you.'" And I tried to tell her that I _don't know_ if I like him or want to date him, and she said, "You know that someone else could give him honmei-choco, right? What then?"

I'm happy if people give him giri-choco, but honmei-choco? I felt like the floor fell out from under me. I grabbed the table for support and everything, like an idiot. I didn't know what to say, and Sora-chan jumped in and saved me by asking advice for what to give Yamato.

And suddenly girls are approaching me and asking me what kind of sweets The Teenage Wolves like. Dear Lord, you should have seen the boys when I made the mistake of asking them. Yamato and Hiro had identical smirks, Aki blushed and started stuttering about how anything would be good, and Naoki started pacing the room and listing off candy names like he was already on a sugar high. I finally got answers out of them and posted the info to our site so people would stop asking me.

Only they _haven't_ stopped asking me. I've started delivering it in an annoyed sort of monotone: "Yamato, dark chocolate, Hiro, pastries, Aki, anything, Naoki, gummy candy." There's more on the site, but I'm kind of done with being specific in person.

I keep trying not to ask myself what I will do if someone confesses to Koushiro-kun on Valentine's Day, but it picks at me anyway. I am _so_ done with this holiday.

Yours,

Eimi

**16/02/04**

**Thursday**

**Yagami Taichi**

Holy shit, I'm seeing red at school. And pink. And white. It's like cupid sneezed everywhere...

Soooo, my teammates are already starting up a betting pool for who will receive giri chocolate, and who will receive honmei chocolate, and who will get zip. Are they serious? Apparently our manager, Momoe-chan, gives the team giri chocolate every year, so that doesn't count for the betting. I'm trying to stay out of it, but they keep talking.

Who cares about that stuff? It's just chocolate, right? No big deal. I asked Koushiro, Jyou, and Yamato, and only Yamato has ever gotten honmei chocolate anyway. It's not something you should freak out about.

I wonder if Sora, Eimi, and Mimi will give us chocolate? They might! Hikari and Mom always give me chocolate, and I got a lot in elementary school, when my soccer club was co-ed, but it's been pretty dry the last few years.

I've been helping Sora practice tennis in my free time. The third years in her club will be graduating soon, so they'll need to replace some people who usually play in matches. She wants one of those spots, and I know she can get there.

Tennis doesn't look so hard on TV, but when you see it in person, you really notice how fast the athletes have to react, and how much they're moving on that court. And my arms killed me after a while. I guess I don't use those as much for soccer, huh? It's really good training! Maybe I should suggest that my team try different sports out, so we can learn some new movements and work some muscle groups we don't regularly use?

**16.02.05**

**Friday**

**Izumi Koushiro**

I believe the party was successful. Mom praised my friends afterward and seemed pleased. As I predicted, I feel exhausted from all of the recent activities. Although I enjoyed myself, I keep grasping at moments alone.

While the computer club outing was interesting, it proved far more trying than anticipated. The president and secretary were rather shocked when I asked if Eimi-san could attend, and that reaction was nearly palpable among the rest of the club when she joined us on Sunday. The male members kept taking me aside to ask how I acquired a girlfriend, and how they might do the same. I was also asked for advice on how to receive chocolates on Valentine's Day.

The only mercy was that no one openly teased me within Eimi-san's hearing. I sincerely hope she failed to notice, but I somehow doubt she missed my agitated behavior.

I'm not sure why the teasing flustered me so much. Surely there would be nothing inherently embarrassing about dating Eimi-san. But I wasn't comfortable discussing it, especially in close proximity to her. And obviously I have no advice on the subject, since we aren't dating. Is it so unusual to be close to a female classmate? I suppose I never have been before now.

I can't help recalling the times my friends have claimed that Eimi-san is interested in me. I'm convinced now that I am important to her, but the topic of romance has never come up between us. I don't know what I would say if it did. I regard her highly and value her company, and there have been times when I thought I perceived a flicker of some foreign emotion around her, but the evidence for romantic attachment is inconclusive. Frankly, I don't even know how to measure or detect it. I fear I may simply lack the capacity for romance, and I hope I don't somehow cause her pain.

At any rate, I hoped the theme of fixating on females would end there, but I was sadly disappointed. The student body is abuzz with speculation regarding who will give what to whom on Valentine's Day. I had forgotten how vexing this holiday can be.

Mimi-san treated us to a discussion on Valentine's Day in America over lunch. It sounded a bit like the Reverse Valentine's Day that has recently surfaced in Japan. It would appear that, in the states, men typically give gifts to women.

I wonder if Eimi-san received gifts in the past? She doesn't speak of the states very often, so it's difficult to say. I know I shouldn't be curious about her business, but Mimi-san mentioned to me in private that, since Eimi-san is American, someone might use the opportunity to give her chocolate. In theory, that possibility shouldn't bother me, but... I suppose it does.

Perhaps I'm just unsettled by the atmosphere. It's difficult to spend half a month surrounded by a celebration of feelings that are alien and uncomfortable to me. Hopefully, I can brush off the barrage of hearts and candy and find some time to program.

**16.02.06**

**Saturday**

**Kido Jyou**

I don't like Valentine's Day... No one is focused on school work the day of, and I would get more done studying at home. Even worse, everyone is distracted by it from the moment they tear January off the calendar. I just want to learn. I don't need to listen to people speculate about who will receive what and what they should give to whom.

I wonder if this will be the first year I receive something from someone other than Mom... I'm trying to tell myself that I won't, but I keep getting my hopes up that Mimi-chan might give me something. The tutoring has been going really well, and her homework marks are improving. And a few days ago, she started calling me by name, just "Jyou." Should I call her "Mimi"? I don't know if I have the nerve. In a lot of ways, I've been a lot happier lately. But I guess I'm aware of the possibility that her grades will improve, and everything will go back to how it was. What are the odds that we'll keep growing closer?

I know myself: uptight, plain, nerdy, not interested in things most people think are fun. I know her: gorgeous, fun-loving, cheerful, extroverted. So those odds are probably pretty low. I guess that's why it hurt when Taichi-kun bugged us about whether we've gotten chocolate in the past or not. I know he didn't mean it badly, so I'm trying not to be annoyed, but... Honestly, it's my fault. I'm too touchy. I should feel better, since only one of the four of us has received honmei-choco before. Misery loves company and all that.

On a happier note, my mock test scores have improved lately at cram school. Mom, Dad, and Mimi-chan have been praising me, which is nice.

The medical club asked me to hold a CPR demonstration. At first, I didn't really want to. But Dad reminded me that it's a simple skill that can easily save lives, so I decided to do it. Our secretary will take care of getting a CPR dummy and the sanitary wrap, so all I have to do is brush up with Dad.

I wonder if I could give a talk on emergency preparedness at some point? It's amazing how much people overlook that.

**16.02.07**

**Sunday**

**Takenouchi Sora**

I've been practicing tennis with Mom and Taichi whenever I can. I was so shocked when I played with Mom the first time! At home, her movements are slow and measured. But she was all speed and grace on the court, even though she's out of practice. I wonder how much she'll improve? I hope it's not too hard on her. I enjoy playing with her, but I don't want to strain her.

Taichi has so much stamina, but he obviously isn't used to using his arms. The first time he hit a tennis ball, he sent it soaring clear out of the court. We couldn't even see where it landed. It took him a while to learn precision and control. I can beat him easily for now, but once he gets a knack for the game, I think I'll have trouble.

Mom has been slowly talking about Yamato more, which I took as a sign that she's more comfortable with the idea of us dating. I got her permission to have him over for dinner Saturday night. It went well, but he was trying a little too hard. He was just a little too well dressed, a little too gracious, a little too charming. When Mom was busy getting drinks, I told him to relax and be himself, and I think it helped a lot.

Isn't that sweet? I'm so glad that he wants to make a good impression on Mom. I think she already likes him, but I also know she worries about me. But I think it was obvious that he wants her to approve of him, and that helped. She didn't talk much at dinner, but she was listening, and that tiny smile was at the corners of her mouth. Those are small signs, but I know her.

I'm a little worried about the Valentine's Day buzz around The Teenage Wolves... Poor Eimi-chan is being flooded with questions about what kind of treats they like, and I know Yamato will get a lot of presents. I'm not jealous, but... I just hope my gift isn't lost among the masses.

What should I make for him? It should be something personal and unique, but that's hard to accomplish with food. I can bake, but I'm no professional. And am I supposed to give the whole band gifts, since I'm dating the club president? I think only our closest friends know, but you can never guess what people have picked up on.

I'd ask Mimi-chan and Eimi-chan for advice, but Eimi-chan seems to have her hands full with the band and wondering what to give Koushiro-kun. As for Mimi-chan, well, I'm almost afraid to ask. She's crazy for Valentine's Day, and I'm not sure if I'm brave enough to hear her suggestion! Or if I could find enough paper to contain her ideas!

I'll admit that the holiday is a little stressful. I hope it all works out for the best for my friends.


	24. February 2

**Voices**

February 2: 8th-14th

**16/02/08**

**Monday**

**Yagami Taichi**

So today was kinda weird.

I played tennis for a long time with Sora on Sunday. I noticed some muscle soreness in my right shoulder this morning, but it wasn't until soccer practice that it really started to kill me.

I tried to ignore the pain, since it's not like I'm using my arms. But when I ran and kicked, there was this jabbing pain shooting down my shoulder, and I started to wear down. I guess Momoe noticed, because she took me aside during a break and asked me what was wrong. I tried to tell her I was fine, but she sent me to the nurse. Normally she's laid back, but she's scary about injuries.

So I went, and Jyou was the nurse's attendant that day. The nurse was focused on a bleeding kid from the kendo club, so Jyou took a look at me. He poked around a little and said it was just muscle strain. He gave me pain killers, then told me to lay down on the bed.

I had no idea he knew physical therapy, but apparently he has some basics. He said his mom did it before she had kids, and that she does it part time now that two out of three are out of the house. It hurt like hell at first, but then some of the tenseness left, and the pain nose-dived.

Anyway, while he was working the muscle, he asked me how I injured myself. So I started talking about playing tennis with Sora. Jyou asked how things are between us, and I was pretty surprised. I didn't realize that he knew I had a thing for her, and now I have this kind of sick feeling, wondering who else might know.

I told him that I'm just trying to wish them well and move on. I was hoping he'd let it go, but he asked how moving on was going. I dunno... I keep telling myself that I'm fine and trying to ignore it. Looking back over my journal, I haven't talked about it much lately. And it has gotten easier, but the truth is that it still hurts a lot.

So I told him that, but I also told him that I'm going to be fine. I have a high school crush that didn't work out. I'm pretty sure that's standard life stuff. I'll get over it, and at least we're still friends. It never got awkward, you know?

By the time he finished his massage, club events were over. I helped him clean up the clinic, and then I was in for a shock. Jyou asked if I wanted to grab some food, so we ended up stuffing our faces at a cafe. Well, I stuffed my face, anyway. He ate a salad and water. Live a little, dude.

We talked about our families, school, our friends, stuff like that. Even though we've been lab partners this year, I've never talked to him this much one-on-one. I dunno, the more I talk to him, the more I realize that he's a really nice guy under all of the freaking out and bossiness. I mean, he didn't have to massage some dude's strained muscle and listen to his problems, you know?

Anyway, I've been trying to cheer myself up about Valentine's Day. I wonder what Hikari, Mom, and my friends will get me? And hey, you never know! This could be the year I get honmei-choco. It could happen! Why the hell not, right?

**16.02.09**

**Tuesday**

**Izumi Koushiro**

I feel worn down lately. My club mates have been engaging me more during meetings, and even outside of them. I've also been talking to Yamato-san about the recording software and working with Sora-san on her clothing site. I'm beginning to feel overwhelmed and in need of solitude.

Jyou-san reminded me that the flu is still a concern. I've been forcing myself to sleep, drink, and eat, despite my lack of appetite and my desire to work on my programming projects. Mom gave me vitamins and immune system supplements, but I still feel sluggish.

I've been trying to forget about Valentine's Day, but I'm afraid the topic continues to prey upon my mind. I've been weighing my desire to show my appreciation for Eimi-san against my fear of indicating romantic interest with a gift.

However... I can't help analyzing my sudden desire to engage in Reverse Valentine's Day, and specifically for Eimi-san alone. I haven't considered preparing a gift for Sora-san and Mimi-san. If I receive something from them, of course I will return their kindness on White Day. But I feel no pull to give them something the day of. What is the difference?

The natural answer is that I'm showing respect for a close female friend in a way that is culturally appropriate for her. But is her nationality really the issue? Mimi-san's comment about another boy potentially giving Eimi-san a gift on Valentine's Day keeps needling me. There's no reason for that to be the case if my goal is to express gratitude to Eimi-san.

That break in logic is forcing me to reevaluate my motives. I lack social experience in general and know nothing about love, save for the example of my parents and the influence of media. The best I can do is compare one friend to another. For example, I generally enjoy Jyou-san's company. He possesses many admirable traits and is easy to get along with, excluding his more anxious moments. He is a positive presence in my life.

That is true of Eimi-san as well, but... Looking through my phone and my emails, it's obvious that I go out of my way to contact her. However, most of these are responses to her messages, so it could simply reflect her attitude towards me.

I don't have much in the way of actual evidence. I have noticed shifts in my behavior towards her, but they are difficult to gauge. For one, she is becoming more visually appealing to me, although rationally I know her appearance hasn't changed. I particularly respond to her smiles and laughter; if she smiles, I return it, and not out of politeness. It happens autonomously, a mimicry I haven't experienced before. I find myself concerned with her welfare; when she is listless, I can't help suggesting that she rest and inquiring after her health in the evening. But while those cues do suggest an attachment of some sort, they don't line up with traditional interpretations of love, at least as I've come to understand it.

Still, I suspect that giving her something would make her happy, and that is a strong argument for doing so. I worry about hurting her, about not being able to return whatever feelings she reportedly has for me. But I also feel a strong urge to contribute to her happiness.

I looked up the American Valentine's Day cards that Mimi-san mentioned. They are uniformly covered in hearts bearing phrases like, "Be mine," "I love you," "Be True," and so on. A more accurate card for me would be, "Our relationship baffles me, but despite my better judgment, I hope the puzzle continues indefinitely."

I somehow doubt that card is available for sale.

**16/02/10**

**Wednesday**

**Tachikawa Mimi**

Dear Diary,

I had another meeting with my parents and my homeroom teacher. My homework and quiz scores are much better, so everyone's hoping that I can get good grades on finals and pass on to my second year normally. Part of me is happy, because I definitely don't want to fail! But I also know that I'm going to have to keep studying so hard every day, and that's killing me. It's _soooo borrrringggg_!

At least I'm not doing it by myself. I'm so grateful to the others, especially Jyou. He's been so nice, always helping me, even though he has to study, too. I'm going to buy everyone chocolates from this trendy gourmet candy place, but... I wonder if I should do something extra for him? I wonder what he likes? Maybe I can get Sora-chan to ask him, so he's surprised when I give it to him.

Speaking of Jyou, I was so shocked the other day! A girl from his medical club came up to him during lunch and was asking about a CPR demonstration he did. Then I saw her talking to him again in the genkan! I teased him about it, but I was mostly trying to get info out of him. Is she into him? Can you imagine? He didn't look embarrassed or flustered or anything, and if anyone can tell if he's worked up, it's me. I wonder...

Sora-chan seems like she's set for Valentine's Day, but Eimi-chan is still waffling. She mentioned that she might give Koushiro-kun an additional present, but she's waffling. I'm trying to convince her to _do it_ already! Sora-chan said I should leave her be, and that she can handle it, but I'm not really sure...

Oh, I had better go out tonight and get my chocolates! I don't want them to run out!

XOXOXO,

Mimi

**16/02/11**

**Thursday**

**Ishida Yamato**

So apparently, lots of girls are asking Eimi what to get The Teenage Wolves for Valentine's Day. I can't say I'm not happy about that, and I know the other boys are, too. But I hope Sora is alright with it. Is there a way to show her that her gift is the one that matters? I'm not sure how I would feel about a bunch of guys potentially giving her Valentine's Day chocolate. Eimi seems a bit high strung about it, too. I guess being constantly asked about presents for us and knowing she won't get one is probably not the best feeling.

Anyway, I want to be sure that Sora won't feel bad on Valentine's Day. I decided to make macarons for her. Mom hasn't made me chocolate since the divorce, but... I guess I'll send a few macarons to her, since I'm making them anyway.

When did Valentine's Day get complicated? God, and that's all before what happened today. Hiro asked me if Sora is going to give the whole band chocolates. I was shocked, and it must have shown, because everyone started laughing. Hiro said that they know Sora and I are together. I think the exact quote was, "You only talk to three girls, and you only make googly eyes at one." Eimi started giggling so hard that I thought she would fall over.

Damn, it's so embarrassing to think that I'm that obvious. But at the same time... I'm kind of glad that they know, and that my friends can tell Sora's important to me. But I'd still rather keep it among my friends for now, so I asked them to keep it quiet.

Hikari texted me asking what she should get for Takeru. I told her about the jelly beans he's addicted to, but she might already know about that. I sent her some recipes for his favorite baked goods, too, just in case. I hope she knows how to bake, though. She's pretty young.

I told Takeru that we're writing songs, and he said he wants to write lyrics for one. I have... reservations. I told him we'll try to write one together, but no promises. I knew about his blogging, but I had no idea he writes poems. They're pretty good for a middle schooler, so... I guess we'll see how it goes.

**16.02.12**

**Friday**

**Kido Jyou**

We took mock tests at cram school the other day, and I moved up two slots from my highest score so far. It doesn't sound like a big deal, I know, but there are a lot of third years in my cram school. They know more than me, so improving relative to them is a good sign. And I really think I got there by tutoring Mimi-chan and filling in gaps in my knowledge based on her questions.

Some of my friends seem a little out of it lately. It's mostly Koushiro-kun and Eimi-chan, but even Sora-chan seems a little distracted. Is this all because of Valentine's Day? I want to ask, but I also really don't want to... I'm trying to keep my head down on the subject.

My CPR demonstration went well. Everyone seemed to understand how to do it. I was even able to distribute some pamphlets and mini emergency kits that the hospital sent with the practice dummy. I've had a few people approach me about learning more practical first aid techniques, so I'm trying to think of ideas. I don't have much free time for it, but this kind of thing is important.

Speaking of first aid, I helped Taichi-kun with a strained muscle the other day. He pulled it pretty badly, but it will be fine. I hope he's actually resting for a few days. I used some of the physical therapy my mom taught me, but I realized that I could use more lessons from her. My friends are a little too accident prone for comfort.

While I was working on his back, Taichi-kun and I ended up talking about Sora-chan, of all things. I suspected that he had a crush on her, and I guess I've been wondering how he's feeling since she started dating Yamato-kun. Honestly, I was surprised by how mature he's being about it. He said it hurts, but he's trying to get over it and feel happy for them. It annoys me sometimes, but I admire Taichi-kun's active side. He made his decision to move on, and he's conscious of it. I keep telling myself to do that and wavering every time Mimi-chan smiles at me. Taichi-kun is a strong person in a lot of ways, and I don't know if I ever will be.

Even though he probably doesn't know about my problem, it was such a relief to talk to someone who is experiencing something similar. We ended up eating dinner together, and I have to say that I like him a lot more when he's calm. When the situation is active, he has a tendency to get too pumped up, but this conversation was helpful, at least for me.

In retrospect, I hope he doesn't mind my poking at his wounds. Maybe I was too focused on my needs... But he does seem like the type who is alright with talking about things in the right environment, unlike Koushiro-kun and Eimi-chan.

I'm sorry for Taichi-kun, but it helps a lot to reinforce that this is all a normal part of growing up.

**February 13, 2016**

**Saturday**

**Anami Eimi**

Dear Kitty,

This was one of the craziest days of my life. Since Valentine's Day is on a Sunday this year, we celebrated it at school today. I should probably back up a little, though.

A few days ago, Jyou-kun, Mimi-chan, Sora-chan, and I studied at Koushiro-kun's apartment after school. At some point, I left Koushiro-kun's room to refill our water pitcher. His mom was in the living room, and she asked me why I seemed so down.

I twitched and froze because I didn't realize I was acting strangely. I'm not sure if I'm obvious, or if Izumi-san is just a really impressive lady. Either way, I didn't know what to say. I think I stood there for a few seconds, holding the pitcher up and not doing anything with it. And I mean, even if I wanted to, I couldn't just say, "I might have a crush on your son, but honestly I don't really know, and aren't you supposed to know?"

So instead I muttered something about being fine. But I realized that she would have an answer to one of the questions that have commandeered my brain lately, and it just popped right out. I asked her what kind of sweets Koushiro-kun likes.

And then I felt heat just, just _explode _all over my skin, because stars, why don't I just make a banner that says 'I like Koushiro-kun' and wave it around? That actually might be more subtle!

And then this slow smile crossed her face, and I thought, _she knows_, and of _course _she knows, because I pretty much told her! She got up from the couch and took the pitcher from me, and that's when I noticed that my hands where shaking.

While she filled it, Izumi-san told me that Koushiro-kun loves strawberries. She suggested that I melt or make chocolate and dip some in it for him, and she explained how to do it and sent me online instructions later.

Is that normal? Is that typically done? I mean, I don't know the etiquette here, but, uh... Ahahaha? I don't know what to make of our conversation. She was pleasant and matter-of-fact about it, but like... Was that supposed to be encouragement? Or was she just answering my question? I was so frazzled!

I knew that if I gave Koushiro-kun chocolate-covered strawberries and gave cookies to everyone else, it would imply that his gift is honmei-choco. Mimi-chan said you're supposed to confess when you give one of those, but I had no clue what the heck was I supposed to confess! "Hey, Koushiro-kun. I think you're amazing, I always want to be around you, and I'm creepily possessive of you. Also, you keep getting cuter, and I don't know what to do. So, uh, maybe I like you?"

I felt like I was setting myself up for disaster, but at the same time... I wanted to do it. I wanted to give him something special on Valentine's Day. I wish I knew exactly why... I think it's mostly gratitude and admiration, but why do I have to be so keyed up about it? My nerves are fried. I'm like Mrs. Bennet ("Such spasms, all over me!").

So yeah, without knowing what I was going to do, or even why, I bought the ingredients and made the strawberries and cookies. And when I woke up this morning, I was shaking and jittery, and I told myself to just forget the strawberries, but I already bought them, and they'll just go bad, and... I took them with me.

I felt a little better when I arrived at school, because the boys were so hilarious! They were all sort of... lingering around, you know? Hovering in the hallways, trying and failing to look nonchalant. I could feel their tension. They all wanted to receive a gift so badly! And I figured that, if all the other boys want chocolate so much, then I was sure to make Koushiro-kun happy.

That's what I told myself, anyway.

It was a half day, so there really wasn't a convenient window to give everyone their cookies. I just handed them out in homeroom before classes started. I gave some to the girls, too. I got treats from Sora-chan and Mimi-chan, and they look really good!

I really liked watching the boys when they received their gifts from us. They looked so happy, especially Taichi-kun and Jyou-kun. But then I was finished handing out the giri-choco, and I turned to Koushiro-kun, and my face got hot and my hands went cold, and I realized that there was no way I could give him his present in front of the others.

And while I was blushing and stumbling over what to say, he asked if I'd meet him in the computer club room after his meeting let out. I was _stunned_. It seemed like something I was supposed to say, not him! I agreed, and then our teacher asked us to return to our seats, so I couldn't ask any questions.

I was a ball of nerves all day, and then I had a different set of problems during band practice. I wasn't even finished giving the boys their cookies when someone knocked at the door to the club room. I answered it and found a queue of girls. I clamped my lips together so I wouldn't laugh or groan. The were giggly and nervous, and they were holding gifts.

What could I do? I stood aside and let them in. It turned into some kind of gift ceremony, and practice was completely shut down while the girls distributed gifts. I was baffled. How are the boys supposed to know which gifts were fan gifts and which ones were honmei? Some of the girls gave _extra_ gifts in addition to treats, and I think that might have been the difference? Geez, can you even imagine having to give an extra gift just to be noticed among all of the other presents?! What a world! I couldn't believe it!

After the first rush, girls kept trickling in, and we ended up propping the door open and canceling practice. Another line formed at the end of the club meeting, and I realized that girls were hoping to have a more private setting by arriving later. Er, sorry, ladies. Not going to happen.

I think some more girls arrived after I left, but the boys already had piles of gifts by then. Aki looked stunned, Yamato looked embarrassed, but happy, and Hiro was grinning from ear to ear. Naoki was about to rip open a package during a lull when I grabbed his hand and told him to stop. I pointed out that he can't just eat the candy and toss the packaging. He had to write down who gave him things for White Day. The boys went pale, and I completely lost it laughing. They have to give _soooo_ many presents on White Day! How the heck will they even carry it all?!

"You're going to have to host a party in here," I choked.

Yamato frowned and looked at his stash. Everyone received a lot, but his pile was basically Mount Choco. "There's no way we can respond individually," he said. "We'll have to bake things and just invite everyone in."

"Is that allowed?" I asked. "You're supposed to reciprocate evenly, and they all addressed the presents directly to you."

"It's not possible," Hiro said. "We'll bake for them and play for them."

"I'm not sure that's even," Aki said. Yamato suggested that they debut a new song to them at the party, and I had to admit that it's a great idea. But I somehow think that Yamato and I will be suckered into baking for all of the girls... I wonder if he'll ask Sora-chan for help?

Oh man, I hope he does something super nice for her. I would feel so insecure if my boyfriend carried two big shopping bags filled with chocolates home on Valentine's Day. He knows he should do something for her, right? Zeus, I hope so. I was too caught up in my own drama to ask.

Anyway... Then I slipped out of band practice and went to the computer club room. The meeting was already over, and Koushiro-kun was the only person there. I don't know what happened, but… the sun was setting beyond the windows, and the room was filled with red-gold light, and when he looked at me, I just… Somehow I _felt_ his glance, and it was like a little jolt all over me. Then I heard my pulse beating between my ears (how did it get up there?!), and suddenly I was too hot, and then too cold, and my body kept flipping between the two like it was attached to taps that someone kept twirling around, just to screw with me.

Have I mentioned how he looks lately? He stood and walked towards me (stupidly, I didn't move into the room, I just stood in the doorway like a twit), and he's practically as tall as I am, maybe just three centimeters shorter. And his eyes are so mature and calm, and sometimes when he looks at me, I feel like he knows _everything_, and I'm at such a disadvantage, because what do I know?! _Nothing_, that's what, not when we're alone and it's Valentine's Day, and he called me out for some reason, and his hair is cute and fluffy and _so_ red, and suddenly I remembered that trail of red hair on his abdomen, and then the whole too hot/too cold thing shifted to volcano and got stuck there.

He stopped by one of the computer stations and picked up a tote bag. I remembered that I had something for him, so I kind of stumbled towards him (suddenly my body forgot that I've been walking like a champ for years). I turned to my bag, and when we straightened, we were both holding a package! I was confused, because girls get presents on White Day, so I kind of stared at him. Then there was this awful silence, and I realized that he looked really tense and uncomfortable. Definitely not all-knowing anymore.

I wanted to end the silence, but I really wasn't prepared to say anything, so I just blurted, "Happy Valentine's Day," and held my box out to him. He took it robotically, and there was another pause. I said, "Uh, Mimi-chan told me that I'm supposed to… say something when I give this to you?"

Koushiro tipped his head and said, "I beg your pardon?" That's when I realized that I was _speaking English _like an idiot_._ The room got even hotter as I stared at the floor and translated. I waited for him to tell me that Mimi-chan was just teasing me, but he never did. It was sort of a sink or swim moment, or at least, that's how it felt.

My throat went dry, and I felt like I was going to choke. Ever since I decided to make Koushiro-kun something special, I knew I had to have some kind of explanation ready. But I never managed to assemble one that didn't sound too weird, too romantic, or both. All I could do was tell him the truth, as fractured and hazy as it was. I can't remember exactly what I said, but it was something like, "Mimi-chan said I'm supposed to tell you that I like you, but... I don't really know what that means, and I don't even know what I feel. But I want to thank you for everything you've done for me, and to tell you that I respect you and admire you so much."

And then I realized that 'admire' can mean 'have a crush on' in English (secret admirer, yeah?), and I panicked and tried to remember if that carries into Japanese. Then Koushiro smiled, and my brain sputtered out. He opened the package, and suddenly I kind of wanted to grab it back and run. His smile vanished when he saw the strawberries, and for a second I thought he didn't like them. Then I noticed that his expression was strange, something I've never really seen before.

"You made cookies for everyone else," he said.

His tone was incomprehensible to me, kind of strained, but with other overtones I couldn't pinpoint. "Uh, would you rather have cookies? I can, I can make more. I just, your mom recommended that I make this for you?"

His eyes widened. "You inquired after my tastes with my mother."

"Is, is that okay? I thought she would have the best answer." At this point, I was convinced I had done something wrong, and I was trying not to panic.

His expression softened, and I finally realized that he was touched. I've never seen him looking so emotional before, so it was foreign. And compared to someone like Mimi-chan or Taichi-kun, it was nothing. Just a pinch of color in the cheeks, a slackening to the mouth, and warmth and softness in his eyes. But it seemed like such a big deal to me, and I was suddenly a little breathless.

"Thank you," he said. "This was very kind of you. I'm afraid my gift isn't as thoughtful as yours, but I hope you'll enjoy it, regardless."

I had forgotten about his present, and I felt my face get so hot that I went a little light-headed. I started babbling about how he didn't have to get me anything, and about how I was sure to like it, and I even mentioned how I'm still carrying the happiness charm he gave me, because _I could not stop talking_ for the life of me.

He cleared his throat and glanced away. "Yes, I've noticed," he said, and I realized that he was getting a little red, too. He handed me a plain rectangular box. It was filled with round chocolates covered with different toppings, things like sprinkles, coconut, chocolate shavings, and crushed pretzels.

"I made truffles. I'm afraid they're quite simple, just ganache, really, but I have very little experience in a kitchen, and-" Maybe he realized that he was babbling, too, because I recognized that look of embarrassment when his mouth snapped shut.

"I, I don't understand. I thought boys gave gifts on White Day?"

He shifted and started looking anywhere but at me. "Ah, well, yes. But I'm told that men typically give gifts today in the states. You've had to make so many adjustments since you moved here. I thought it might be nice to experience something more familiar."

I might have laughed under different circumstances. "Um, this isn't really familiar. I've never gotten such a nice Valentine's Day gift before."

He glanced back down at his box, and I could hear him swallow. "Neither have I."

The atmosphere was really… It was… Oh, boy. I was starting to lose it, and even though I was thrilled to receive so much one-on-one attention from Koushiro-kun, I felt like I needed to run away and regroup. I started to thank him, and he shook his head and said, "Please, Eimi-san. My gift was meant to show my appreciation for you." He started gathering his things, and I put his gift in my backpack.

I thought we were done, and I was almost at the door when he said, "You mentioned some confusion regarding the nature of our relationship. I admit that my feelings towards you are also… complex." He tipped his head and frowned at me, making the exact expression he has in class when he doesn't understand something, that cute puzzled look I like so much. A high-pitched squeak slid up my throat. He must have heard it, because he grinned and said, "If you're willing, I would benefit from more data."

I'm not even sure if I had enough wits left to stutter at him. I might have just stared. He asked if we could walk home together, and I nodded and fell into step with him, more like an automaton than a person. And when we were out of the school building, he offered me his arm.

Several hours later, I'm still expecting to wake up and find that none of this actually happened. I can't even say how I feel about it. Thank goodness I have a day off to try and process this.

I'm going to go lay down.

Yours,

Eimi

**16/02/14**

**Sunday **

**Takenouchi Sora**

We celebrated Valentine's Day at school yesterday, but Yamato and I agreed to celebrate it together today, the day of. I tried so hard not to notice the girls talking about Yamato and The Teenage Wolves yesterday, but it was impossible... So many girls wanted to give him something. I couldn't help wondering how many of them were giving gifts as fans, and how many were trying to confess.

Yamato told me that his band mates know we're together. I'm glad... It makes me a little more comfortable with the fan situation knowing that his friends won't tease him about whose gifts he should focus on. The acknowledgment is a big relief. Plus, my gift to the band made more sense that way. I made brownies for them and my friends, including the girls. Mom and I also mailed Dad chocolates that we made together. We did it a few days ago... I hope he received them on time.

Yamato and I walked home together, and he had two huge shopping bags filled with gifts. He was tense and a little awkward because of it. It was so hard not to feel jealous or upset, but I told myself to see what happens on Valentine's Day before I react. Besides, I trust him.

He told me about the White Day party the band is planning to repay the girls for their gifts. Trust a bunch of boys to find a way to avoid writing all of those individual cards! But they're right... We'll be so happy to hear the new song, eat the sweets they made, and hang out with them that we won't mind.

Since Valentine's Day fell on a Sunday this year, Yamato took me out on a date. Everyone else had the same plan; everywhere was so crowded! We spent the day shopping, and after lunch, I taught Yamato a bit about tennis. I would love to be able to practice with him. It will take some time for him to get used to it, but he improved a lot just during the hour or so that we played. He has great instincts for it, always moving in the right direction.

I thought we would go out for dinner, but Yamato asked me to come to his place. When we arrived, the table was set with a tablecloth, full service, and candles, and there was a bouquet of roses in a vase. I was shocked! I've never received a present on Valentine's Day before.

Yamato put his arms around me and said, "I want to thank you for everything you've done for me this year. And, just so you know... All of that stuff yesterday? I'm glad the band is doing well, but this is what matters." He glanced at those bags from yesterday, which were next to the couch, and chuckled. "Also, if you'd like some candy, go for it. I've been trying to share it with my family so I don't go diabetic."

I was suddenly very glad that I didn't pick at him yesterday. I didn't really know what to say, so I kissed him, then asked what was for dinner. He smirked (I hate to say this, but sometimes I lose it a little when he smirks and gets that gleam in his eye) and walked into the kitchen. "I'm cooking for you. My Dad's working until late."

I was already blushing, but that really made my face hot. I negotiated staying out until nine with Mom, which meant we had a few hours alone, the longest stretch so far. And Mom is the only person who has cooked for me before, so having a meal made by him was extra exciting.

Yamato told me to relax and turned on some music with his laptop, but I didn't want to just wait in the living room. I asked if he had another apron, and we made beef sukiyaki together. I did most of the prep while he worked with the skillet. But apparently my knife technique didn't make the cut, because he stood behind me, reached around me, and showed me how to slice the mushrooms, leeks, and veggies. Between the two of us, I think I was cutting them just fine, but I let him be opportunistic this time.

We ate and cleaned up, and he set aside some for his dad. He must do that a lot... My father is away for work so often, and Mom can be distant, but spending time with Yamato at his place reinforced that he grew up alone. Feeding himself, doing the chores, feeding his father... I don't know if I could have done that. In some ways, he's so strong... But sometimes, he doesn't allow himself to be weak, and that causes its own problems.

But I'm getting off topic. I just wanted to say that it's so sweet of him to take care of his father. I hope that I can make him feel a little less lonely.

After dinner, I gave him the raspberry-filled dark chocolate truffles I made for him. He seemed impressed, and they _were_ hard to make, but of course I didn't tell him that! Then he gave me a box of home made macarons! I couldn't believe it, after everything else he already did. Even stranger, the macarons were dark chocolate with a raspberry layer in the middle! He basically French-ified my gift to him, and they are _delicious_.

We spent the rest of the evening cuddling, talking, eating sweets, and doing other things I won't mention. By the time Yamato walked me home, I think my blood sugar was up by about 200%. Don't tell Jyou-kun.

I know I'm just starting out with Yamato, and we're definitely in that "new couple" stage. But I hope we can have lots of Valentine's Days just like this one. I was supposed to treat Yamato today, but he did so much for me... You should have seen my mother's expression when she saw my roses. She made an arrangement out of them for me, and it made me so happy. I'm taking it as a sign that she's beginning to trust Yamato, too.

I know we're so young, and I should try not to fall as hard as I am. But it's already too late for wisdom and wariness. I love him, and I can't help but feel hopeful for the future.

I wonder what's going to happen on White Day? Should I get him another present? It's a bit confusing, really! Maybe we'll go on a date instead of exchanging gifts again. I would love another full day with him.

**Author's Notes: **Thanks for reading! You've read over 90,000 words of _Voices _now! Thank you :D I would really love to hear from you! I kind of assume you like the story at this point, haha! Encouragement is always so helpful for fanfic writers. It's basically our only currency and metric of how we're doing.

So finally, the next chapter will conclude our Valentine's Day coverage. Whew! I'm getting burnt out on this. Only six more updates remain, so please stick around and enjoy :) Have a lovely day!


	25. February 3

**Voices**

February 3: 15th-21st

**16.02.15**

**Monday**

**Kido Jyou**

So, uh... Wow. Where do I start?

On Saturday, Sora-chan and Eimi-chan gave me treats during homeroom. They're the first I've gotten from someone besides Mom, so I was thrilled. But when Mimi-chan distributed her gifts, she told me that I'd have to wait for mine. She winked, and it was the most mischievous expression, I felt my knees go watery. Thank god I was sitting down!

I won't lie, I was jittery about it during school and my club. I'll have to ask Koushiro-kun and Eimi-chan for their notes, so I can see if I missed anything. Just the memory of that wink makes my heart jump. This has to be bad for my nerves...

That afternoon, Mom opened my bedroom door while I was studying and let Mimi-chan in. Even though I was half expecting her, I kind of panicked. She was wearing the cutest red dress and carrying a huge cake holder. She held it out to me and cried, "Happy Valentine's Day!"

I stumbled forward to take the cake, since it looked heavy. She smiled and said, "I made you something special to thank you for all of your help. Tell me what you think of it, okay? It's a new Mimi recipe!"

As shocked and happy as I was, I still managed to feel a little wary. I've seen what can happen when Mimi-chan gets creative in the kitchen. I tried to than her, but of course I got tongue tied. She looked at me for a few seconds, and I thought she was going to start teasing me. But her smile was kind of... different. Not playful.

Suddenly, she put her hand on my shoulder, stood on her toes, and kissed my cheek. Then she giggled, turned towards the door with the perfect skirt twirl, said goodbye, and left.

I don't even know if I managed to say goodbye to her. Everything kind of shut down, and at last I realized that I had food, and food belongs in the kitchen. So I shambled over there and put it on the counter.

My parents and Shin were home, and they crowded me, asking about what I got and teasing me about Mimi-chan. I opened the cake carrier and took off the lid. The scent of chocolate slammed into me, along with a bunch of undertones that I couldn't place, and that made me nervous.

My family was stunned, and I guess I can't blame them. The cake was enormous, and of course they all know Mimi-chan by now. How could I go from no chocolate one year to three presents from classmates, with one of those being this massive cake?!

Shin said he wanted a piece, and I almost told him no. I wanted to keep it to myself- when have I ever gotten something like this? But obviously I'd go into diabetic shock if I tried to eat the whole thing. I cut the cake and was alarmed to see that different sections of the cake had different types of frosting and garnishing, although the outer icing was all chocolate. But like I said, I knew I would need help eating the cake, so... I handed out slices without mentioning anything.

At first, everyone said it was good. But eventually, Shin made a choking sound, and his face went all pinched in, like he had eaten something sour. I asked him what was wrong, and he gasped, "It's umeboshi!"

Umeboshi. Mimi-chan put pickled salt plums in the cake. Made icing out of it, somehow, in fact. It was so ridiculous, so random, so like her... I completely lost it laughing. "What does yours taste like, then?" he asked. "Here, where the icing is red between layers."

That shut me up. But what could I do? I knew Mimi-chan would ask if I liked it, so there was no choice. I ate a piece of red icing and cake. The first thing that hit me was a punch of saltiness, followed by heat and the sweet bitterness of dark chocolate. I coughed and dove for my water cup.

"Salt and jalapenos," I gasped. Mom giggled, but Shin and Dad asked for a bite. And you know, it was good! The flavor profile was really strong and complex. It definitely helps to have a warning, though. Otherwise, your taste buds short circuit.

My parents ended up with a more conventional raspberry flavor. The umeboshi slice wasn't too good. I like the sour saltiness of umeboshi in small doses, but it didn't pair well with the cake. But the jalapeno section is shockingly good. I told Mimi-chan about our reactions, and apparently she wants to try making jalapeno chocolates.

I'll be honest, I really don't know what to make of Mimi-chan's gift. It was way bigger than what she gave the others, but I have spent a lot of time tutoring her. And while the kiss was a lot by Japanese standards, that sort of thing is more common in the states. I'm trying not to torture myself with picking it apart. I just want to be happy about it.

But I probably should do something to counteract my sugar intake recently... Maybe I should jog…

**16/02/16**

**Tuesday**

**Yagami Taichi**

I _told_ you this could be my year!

When Momoe-chan handed out her gifts for the team on Saturday, she gave everyone a little box of homemade chocolates. I got cupcakes. Yes, multiple cupcakes. _Packaged in a heart-shaped box_.

I wish she hadn't given it to me in front of everyone, but I guess Momoe-chan is upfront like that. My teammates teased me about it, but... Hey, who's embarrassed by getting a honmei gift from a cute girl? They're just jealous.

Geez, I was already doing really well. Hikari and Mom gave me nice gifts, and I got something from Sora-chan, Eimi-chan, and Mimi-chan. Haha, I'll finally have enough to eat for a few days! I'm usually hungry all the damned time.

Anyway, I guess I have to think about how I feel about Momoe-chan. She didn't say anything in particular, but I'm pretty sure that counts as a confession. I've never thought about her like that before, but she's cute, nice, she likes sports, and then there's those legs... Maybe I should ask her out, you know, just something casual. See how it goes. I think it would at least be fun for both of us, and there might be something there.

I was feeling pretty damned good until I ran into Yamato and his brother on the way home. They each had two enormous bags stuffed with presents! What the hell! Why would you pile more stuff onto a guy who has so many girls after him? I don't get it.

But I saw Hikari's gift to Takeru on top of one of his piles. Mine is still bigger, so try harder, kid. Onii-chan wins this round.

I hope I do this well next year, too! But what should I do for White Day?

**February 17th, 2016**

**Wednesday**

**Anami Eimi**

Dear Kitty,

It's been days, and I'm still trying to process everything. I feel like my whole world shifted, and I haven't figured out the new configuration yet.

I like Koushiro-kun. It's the only interpretation that makes sense. And he might like me, too. That's what he said on Saturday, more or less, and lately he's been paying more attention to me, initiating on his own, and we held hands under the table at the study group the other day, and I must have done it by accident, but he didn't move away, and, and-

It's kind of a big deal, okay? To me. I think it is. And, uh... Yeah, that's all my brain is giving me right now, because that's all it's been able to do since Saturday. So... bye.

Yours,

Eimi

**16/02/18**

**Thursday**

**Ishida Yamato**

I cannot _believe_ the number of chocolates I received on Saturday. The apartment smells like a candy store. Dad and I don't even like sweets that much...

We celebrated Valentine's Day at school on Saturday, and band practice got overrun by girls bringing The Teenage Wolves gifts. I've gotten treats on Valentine's Day before, including honmei, but _this_... I think nearly half the girls in the school showed up to drop something off for at least one of the four of us. There was a line out the club room door. I think we were all feeling pretty damned pleased with ourselves until Eimi pointed out that we have to reciprocate on White Day.

We decided to hold an event with treats and new music for the girls, but I'm already wondering how much of the baking will be left up to Eimi and me. I hope I can get the whole band to help. Maybe we can use the home ec lab... We'll need a lot of prep space.

Sora and I met up with Takeru on the way home to give him presents for him and Mom. I was shocked to see that he had just as much chocolate as I did! He's not even in a band! He's a member of the basketball team. That's not normally something girls go crazy over, is it? Dear God. Maybe I should recruit him for my band...

Apparently Hikari gave him jelly beans and handmade chocolate. Sora was there, so I couldn't say it then, but I called to tell him to make sure that Hikari isn't intimidated by all of the other gifts he received. I hope he listened. Although he's younger than me, he'd rather give advice than take it.

I wasn't expecting anything from Mom, but Takeru gave me chocolates from her. It's been a long time, but I think she's changed the recipe from years ago. The taste was fuller and more bitter. She called to thank me for the macarons.

I spent Sunday with Sora. We spent the morning shopping and looking at fashion sites, trying to get ideas for Teenage Wolves outfits. Afterward, we played tennis. I was surprised by how intense the game is. I've seen the players moving so much and so quickly, but I didn't realize how hard it really is until I tried it. There's a lot of mental demand, too. There's hand-eye coordination to hit the ball, but your whole body needs to anticipate where the ball will be and start moving in an instant.

It was tough, especially when there was so much temptation to look at Sora. God, I love her in tennis skirts, even with the leggings for cold weather. Especially with them. It doesn't matter. She's so beautiful, and I love her focused expression on the court.

I want to keep practicing with her. Obviously there are… perks, but I haven't put enough time into fitness in general. I can't nag Takeru about his diet and habits if I'm not exercising.

After tennis, I invited her to my place. I have some French in my background, and I wanted to be very clear about what Sora means to me after all of those gifts from Saturday. I figured, why not celebrate Valentine's Day as a European man would?

I did some research and did the whole thing: sweets, roses, candles, music, and a home-cooked meal. Sora's not the type to squeal or swoon, but I think it went over really well.

I wanted to do all of the cooking, but she asked to help, and I figured it's best to let the lady do as she pleases. I haven't cooked with anyone since I lived with Mom. It's weird how much I enjoyed a mundane task with Sora there. Teasing her, making excuses to touch her, just talking to her and hearing her voice... I wish she could always be around. I don't dislike being alone- in fact, it's preferable to being with most people- but with her... I guess this is why people like having other people around.

I wonder why Sora's an exception? Before her, I was happy to keep my distance from everyone except my nuclear family. Lately I've made a few more friends, and I do like them. But if I had to part with them, it wouldn't kill me.

Sora's different. Why? I never thought anyone would approach being as important to me as Takeru is, and of course it's different with Sora, but... Here we are. I could sit here and list her positive traits, but I could make other lists for other people. There's still a sense that Sora is more. Almost other, but also like me. And when you add how it feels to kiss her until I can't think- Well, I should probably leave it at that.

I wonder what we should do for White Day? I tried to dance with her on Sunday, but we don't know much about it. Maybe I should sign us up for a dancing class? I've never been interested in dancing, but that was before I had Sora to partner with.

I could definitely get into learning how to move with her.

**16/02/19**

**Friday**

**Tachikawa Mimi**

Dear Diary,

I had a great time delivering Jyou's present on Saturday! He went all slack jawed when he saw my gift, and I couldn't help myself. I kissed his cheek, and he turned so red in an instant! It was like someone spilled red paint on his face, omg, _toooooo cuuuuute!_

I delivered the cake in person because it was too big to carry at school, but also because it gave me a chance to see his bedroom. I checked, but I didn't see any bags or boxes in there besides the ones from Sora-chan and Eimi-chan, so I don't think he got other presents. Go, Detective Mimi!

I don't like to think about this stuff too much, but I keep remembering what Sora-chan told me about hurting Jyou. I would never! But I can't help liking the way he fusses over me. Any girl would! I'm not sure if that means I like him.

I've definitely been more attracted to other guys. For example, I went with Sora-chan to watch when she brought some prototype clothing to a Teenage Wolves practice to check the sizes. Those boys looked amazing! Sora-chan really knows how to play up their natural vibes, and she had Yamato-kun looking particularly drool-worthy.

I don't really feel that when I look at Jyou. I mean, he's tall. That's nice. And his body shape is good, broad in the shoulders and narrow through the hips. But he doesn't have Taichi-kun's athletic definition or Yamato-kun's good looks and presence. He's not bad looking at all, although I hope for his sake that he grows out of his gawky, lanky stage.

I guess back in the states, I kind of went for the bad boys. Cool, tough, popular, handsome, edgy, you know. But... Well, maybe that's how my problems with rumors got started. I don't know. I've been kind of turned off towards dating since then, anyway.

But if I really think about it, I never respected anyone I dated the way I respect him. Really, I don't know if I've respected any boy my age the way I respect him. He's nice, patient, smart, caring, and mature. He's definitely wound too tight, though! Would I even have fun with him? But he makes studying almost not bad...

But what's the point of thinking about this stuff? If there's no chemistry, there's no chemistry. I'm starting to sound like Eimi-chan, going back and forth like this!

Oh, speaking of, I think there's something going on between her and Koushiro-kun, _finally_! I haven't gotten much out of her yet, but I'm a girl! I know these things! I should text her and see if I can get her to talk!

XOXOXO,

Mimi

**16/02/20**

**Saturday**

**Takenouchi Sora**

I've been designing clothes for Yamato's band. I had no idea I'd enjoy men's fashion this much! I only hope it isn't because of the quality of my models. The Teenage Wolves are a good looking bunch, and outfitting them in rock band clothing has been so fun!

I wonder if I could convince them to model street clothing designs for my site? I don't think I'd ever be without a wait list if they did. Just Yamato and Takeru-kun would probably be enough, though. I had no idea he was so popular, but he got just as much chocolate as Yamato on Valentine's Day. The more I get to know Takeru-kun, the more I wonder how Yamato's stayed sane so far. Takeru-kun's really something else.

Dad called to thank me for his chocolates. Mom must have mentioned Yamato to him, because he asked about him. I was a little embarrassed on on-the-spot, because I'm his little girl. I was afraid he'd feel put out by me having a special boy in my life, especially since I so rarely see Dad. I ended up rambling about Yamato for a while, probably saying a lot more than I should have out of nerves.

In the end, Dad told me to be careful, but he said that he trusts me. I really wish he could meet Yamato, so that he'll know he doesn't have to worry.

I was playing tennis with Mom the other day, and I was shocked when she challenged me to a contest! She said the loser of our match would have to make dinner. I agreed, mostly to see what would happen. I had no idea Mom was so good at tennis. She played harder than she has with me so far, and I had to go all out. I wonder if this was her way of letting me know that I was going too easy on her? We're playing together so that I can improve, so it's no good if I hold back because I think she can't keep up with me.

I won, but just barely. I said that we should shop and cook together, since Yamato taught me that it's more fun than cooking alone. And I'm grateful to Mom for helping me with tennis, even if I wish she would directly tell me to play harder.

Maybe moms want their kids to step up on their own? I wish I understood her better, but I'm glad that I've made progress.

**16.02.21**

**Sunday**

**Izumi Koushiro**

I believe I might have inadvertently set something in motion.

My school celebrated Valentine's Day last Saturday. Eimi-san distributed her treats during homeroom, but I knew I would be unable to explain my gift at all, let alone in front of others. When she approached me, I requested a meeting in the computer lab after my club meeting to spare myself the embarrassment of publicly flubbing the exchange.

Despite time spent systematically searching for an acceptable explanation for my motive in giving her a gift, I had nothing ready. My plan was to give her the chocolates and hope she didn't ask. Brilliant, I know, but I conceived of no better option.

As unskilled as I am at reading social cues, I knew Eimi-san was unsettled as soon as she entered the computer lab. Her color was high, and she was twitchy, which was starkly at odds with her typical comfortable behavior around me. This confirmed my fear that I might be unable to restrict the encounter to strictly platonic exchanges. I admit that my nerves were engaged, along with some other emotion strangely akin to excitement.

There was a horrible silence as we faced each other holding our gifts. I began to falter, even before an exchange of greetings or... any sort of acknowledgment of one another, really. I froze up, and Eimi-san was forced to move the encounter along.

I've never seen her quite like that before, crimson and jittery. Her skin is so pale, it has a nearly translucent quality, and the flushing was so visible. The effect was... charming? Attractive? Endearing? Regardless of how I categorize it, those odd feelings further incapacitated me.

Eimi offered me her gift and began to babble in English. My understanding is that defaulting to one's mother language is a sign of emotional strain, and I wondered if I had placed to much pressure on her with my request for a private meeting.

As I opened the package, she said that Mimi-san told her it was important to explain a Valentine's Gift. That was a bit of subterfuge on Mimi-san's part that I (somewhat uncharitably, I fear) neglected to correct. With much stuttering and staring anywhere but at me, she told me that she likes, admires, and respects me.

Such an admission can hardly fail to please, especially when delivered so earnestly. Although I was uncomfortable, I couldn't help but smile. Then I found that her gift was chocolate-covered strawberries, in contrast to the cookies she gave everyone else.

Somehow, this reinforced all of the times when Eimi-san has paid me particular care and attention, and I experienced a swelling sensation shooting from my chest to my throat. It was hard to think, and harder still to speak. I'm afraid I can't exactly recall the rest of our conversation. It was veiled to me even at the time, half drowned out by a vexing distortion of my senses.

I did manage to register that we're both drawn to one another, and that this pull confuses and disorients us. And when something puzzles me, I can't help but investigate. I asked her to provide me with more data, and her response of blushing and squeaking was extremely satisfying.

I've been making an effort to engage her more frequently since then, and while these unfamiliar emotions strain me, I can't deny that I've been enjoying myself. I'm suddenly pleased to attend classes, rather than enduring school when I'd rather be programming at home. And if my mother's smiles and gently teasing questions are any indication, the difference is noticeable.

While we were studying at Jyou-san's apartment the other day, Eimi-san's hand brushed me under the kotatsu. I truly doubt she noticed her hand closing around mine; she was focused on a math problem. I faltered over how to react for so long that I lost the option of backing out smoothly. I felt the moment when she realized what had happened; she twitched, glanced at me, colored, and tightened her grip. She didn't release me for a long interval. Generally, I would strongly prefer not be touched, but in Eimi-san's case... I've found contact from her is simultaneously stimulating and comforting. In a word, enjoyable, to the point where I've wondered if more contact might yield a stronger reaction.

I still have no idea how to categorize our relationship. I'm no longer sure if that matters. Whatever we are, it's pleasant and worth pursuing. My goal now is to try to still my mind and enjoy her company, but I fear that I remain awkward. It's fortunate and comforting that she doesn't seem to mind.

I only wish I could help her relax. This seems to be as intimidating to her as it is to me, and her emotions clearly run stronger than mine. I wish I knew how to open a discussion about it with her, but I can't begin to conceive of what to say.

It's infuriating how something that comes so naturally to some people is nearly impossible for others.

**Author's Notes: **There are four chapter left of Voices! Please stick around and tell me what you think :) Thanks for reading!


	26. March 1

**Voices**

March 1: 29th-6th

**16/02/29**

**Monday**

**Takenouchi Sora**

All of my tennis practice with Mom, Yamato, and Taichi paid off! I was added to the roster for our competitive games, and I won my match on Saturday! It was a close game, but I didn't want to disappoint my seniors, and I knew Yamato and Taichi were watching. Somehow, I pulled ahead at the end. I've played before, but those were practice matches that didn't count for our competitive standing. I'm so grateful that my seniors gave me this chance.

I joined Yamato for dinner with his brother and mother on Sunday. He's told me that he rarely saw her after he went to live with his father. It must have been a hard time for everyone, but I wish he could have seen his mother more often growing up. It was lonely for him, and so much tension developed between them during the separation. I know Japanese divorce culture is rigid, especially compared to the states, but I don't understand why Takaishi-san dropped out of Yamato's life like that.

But it seems like Takeru is insisting that they repair some of that damage. From what I can tell, Yamato is willing, but the bitterness and loneliness of growing up without half of his family is standing in the way.

I hope I'm not being presumptuous, but I think he wanted my presence to ease some of that pressure. I tried to be as friendly as possible. I can see so much of Yamato in his mother that I liked her right away, despite some misgivings. She's kind, but introverted and guarded. It took some doing to convince her to speak freely; she was a little brusque at first, although that might be a reporter's instinct. Takeru wanted it to go well so badly, he kept adding on to what his mother said and softening things.

I've seen Takeru a few times now, and I think he's wonderful. I'm an only child, and I've always wondered what it would be like to have a sibling. He's mischievous and has a tendency to do whatever he wants to do, but he's good-hearted, smart, and cheerful, and he's so eager to see the rift heal between his family members. How could I not like him?

The dinner took a bit of effort socially, but it was fun. I really hope they liked me... Yamato says they do, but that kind of assurance never seems to be enough. I want to know for sure!

My stage outfits for the Teenage Wolves are almost complete! The boys look amazing in them. All of this research into male fashion gave me so many ideas for street clothes. I showed my sketches to Mimi-chan, and she told me I should make them and have a fashion show. She even wants me to sell tickets! I think she might be overestimating me (and people's interest in my work!), but she talks about it often and seems so excited...

What should I do?

**16/03/01**

**Tuesday**

**Yagami Taichi**

So I've been hanging out with Momoe-chan after practices lately, trying to get to know her better. You know, trying to see if we're compatible, figuring out what she likes for White Day, that kind of thing.

She's serious about the soccer team, and she's really focused and strict about it, kind of like Eimi. But she's chill and friendly otherwise, like Mimi, and she's super nice and mature, like Sora. She knows a lot about sports, and she says she likes to jog. I asked if I could join her one day this week after school, and she said yes.

Until now, I haven't spoken to her much beyond club stuff, but she seems really cool. Fingers crossed that we hit it off! I wonder where she would want to go on a date, if it gets to that? Maybe an amusement park or a soccer game? Maybe I shouldn't start with soccer. Mimi says I talk about it too much, so I don't want to drown her in it, even if she likes it.

I went to Sora's first competitive tennis match. She invited me specifically, since I helped her train, and I didn't realize that I was going to end up sitting next to Yamato for an hour. He was stiff at first, but it's not like me to just sit there and ignore someone (unless they pissed me off), so I started talking. I was surprised when he responded. We talked about a lot of stuff, mostly about my team, his band, and the last month of school. I've seen his test scores, and I know they're good, but I never noticed how quick-witted he is. He always has some snappy comeback, and honestly it was a pretty fun conversation. I don't know, it feels like we might somehow shift from tolerating each other to being friends. That's good news. I'm tired of radio silence on his end whenever I say something in our group.

Sora ended up winning, but of course she did. She's awesome. No surprises there!

Oh, speaking of, Mimi keeps talking about Sora needing me to model for her fashion show. It sounds embarrassing, but I'm kinda flattered, too. Haha, I wonder if Mimi's going to try to rope Koushiro and Jyou into it? That would be freaking hilarious!

**16.03.02**

**Wednesday**

**Izumi Koushiro**

I'm exhausted. Lately, I've been tutoring Mimi-san, studying with Jyou-san and Eimi-san, and working on soccer strategies with Taichi-san. Yamato-san approached me about recording the next Teenage Wolves performance, which wouldn't be too bad, I suppose. But Mimi-san has asked me to... to model in Sora-san's fashion show, and I am _not_ inclined to accept.

I tried to refuse outright, but Mimi-san has a way of steamrolling through a conversation and hearing what she wants to hear. I want to be helpful to Sora-san, but... modeling? I doubt there is a task that I'm less inclined and able to perform. On the other hand, my New Year's resolution was to foster relationships with my friends. Refusal seems counter-productive. I'm not sure what I should do. Is Sora-san even aware that Mimi-san is enlisting models?

I (generally) enjoy assisting my friends, but I'm afraid my tolerance for social interactions is depleting.

Eimi-san has been spending more time at my apartment, remaining behind after Jyou-san and Mimi-san depart from study sessions. She often reads beside me at the kotatsu while I work on my computer. It's strange how easily she assimilated to my family's microculture. My parents always chat with her a bit, and sometimes she helps my mother cook and stays for dinner. I find that her presence doesn't take a toll on me, as social interactions often do. Is this a normal progression? I fear an individual of my personality has no base for "normal" in social situations.

I'm feeling stressed and fatigued, so I suppose I should turn in early.

**16/03/03**

**Thursday**

**Tachikawa Mimi**

Dear Diary,

I can't believe it, but the school year is almost over! Usually I would say, "It's time for a party over break!". But I need good grades if I want to become a second year with Sora-chan and the others. I'm so sick of studying, my head feels like it's full of cotton! But I have to do it.

It would be so terrible without my friends... Jyou helps me so much, and so do Eimi-chan, Koushiro-kun, and Sora-chan. And they all keep me cheerful, since we're together. There's nothing worse than being shut up in my room by myself at a desk!

I want to thank them... Maybe I can put together a sakura viewing party? I haven't done hanami since I left Japan. I checked the sakura forecast, and the blooms are at their peak in Tokyo during our spring break this year. I'm sure we could put together a nice picnic beneath the flowers.

But I'll worry about that later. Right now, Sora-chan has sooooo many design sketches, and they look amazing! I think she's got double inspiration right now. I don't think she's ever designed male clothing before now, and she's got _quiiiiite_ the model to give her ideas! Plus, Sora-chan is so sensitive to the seasons. She keeps talking about flowers blooming and spring colors and outdoor activities she's hoping she can do soon.

Her designs are totes adorbs, and I told her that she needs to get those clothes out there! But it IS almost the end of the year, so she can't sew all of that by herself in time, especially with finals. Sooooo, guess what I did?

My fashion club friends are fans of Sora-chan's work, so I borrowed her sketchbook and brought it to a meeting. Most of them said they would love to throw a fashion show using her designs as a club function! Wouldn't that be _so cool?!_

We have lots of female model volunteers, but we need more boys! There aren't many in the club. And I want all of my friends involved, so I've been asking them to help. I can't sew as well as most of my club mates, but I can do the event organization and prep the models.

I want to surprise Sora-chan... Won't she be shocked when she finds out I put together a fashion show for her?! But Jyou told me I really need to ask her first. He said that she might not want other people handling her designs and said something about artist pride. Plus, apparently it might overwhelm her. I don't know... I respect his opinion, and I definitely don't want to upset Sora-chan, but wouldn't a surprise be more fun? Jyou said I probably wouldn't be able to keep it quiet with so many people involved, anyway.

He's probably right. If it's going to get out anyway, I'd rather tell her and make sure it's okay. It's nice of him to think about Sora-chan's feelings, but I guess that's like him.

I keep trying to tease Eimi-chan about Koushiro-kun. Something's up with them, I know it. I saw them holding hands under the table during a study session when I dropped my pen beneath the kotatsu blanket. I almost squealed out loud, but I knew Eimi-chan would get self-conscious and let go of him if I did that. Ahhh, I wanted to bring it up _sooooo baaaaad_! God, I bet that's as far as they've gotten after a year of mooning after each other. They are just such sweet little later bloomers!

But anyway, she won't tell me anything about it, ughhhhhh! This is what girlfriends _doooo_! And again, when I was alone with Jyou, he asked me to stop teasing Eimi-chan about it. And I mean... I guess he has a point. She turns bright red and starts mumbling and tries to get out of the conversation. But why would she get upset about talking about something good? I just want to share it with her and be happy together.

I told Jyou that, and he said I should ask her why she gets upset and respect her answer. Geez... I don't know if I'm ready to be so grown up. How has he been doing this for so long? Doesn't he ever get tired of always looking out for people? I wonder who looks out for him... Maybe no one except his family. Maybe that's why he's all uptight.

Uggghhh can't I just think about fashion shows and hanami celebrations?!

XOXOXO,

Mimi

**16/03/04**

**Friday**

**Ishida Yamato**

I had another dinner with Takeru and Mom over the weekend. They've been getting better, but it's still a little awkward. I invited Sora, both because my Mom asked to meet her, and because I hoped she could help it go more smoothly.

It was definitely the easiest one of these dinners. Sora kept the conversation flowing without Takeru's constant chatter, and without polite questions and short answers between Mom and me. Sora's not extroverted, but she's so much friendlier than I am.

I know Takeru likes her, and I think Mom does, too. I don't see how you couldn't. I wonder if I could talk to Mom as easily as she did someday? I know Mom's a likable person, but... I guess I still have some baggage to get over. At least it's getting better.

Eimi signed us up for our next contest last week, and we're working really hard to prepare. I've been sending her all over, coordinating with our fan club, posting event fliers, recording our practices and spotting weak areas, that kind of thing. Meanwhile, we're practicing until our fingers ache.

I watched Sora's first competitive tennis match with Taichi. At first, I wished I could just watch Sora by myself, but the matches are pretty long. I'm impressed by how mature he's being about everything. We talked about school and our friends, and I enjoyed his company. I guess he has to be alright after all, if Sora's friends with him.

I've been thinking about White Day. I'm set for Sora, but I'm still trying to decide what to bake for our fans. Probably easy things, like brownies. But we also need to do something for Eimi, who does so much thankless work for The Teenage Wolves. I'll brainstorm with the guys, but I don't know if they'll have any good ideas, especially now. We're really focused on the contest. Sora might be a better person to ask.

**March 5, 2016**

**Saturday**

**Anami Eimi**

Dear Kitty,

I'm so tired. My emotions are rioting lately, and I feel like I'm drowning under them, getting yanked from one extreme to the next. I'm trying to focus on studying for finals and preparing for our contest, but my brain keeps migrating back to Koushiro-kun.

I know it's so silly, because adolescent romances are such... Such a cliche topic. It literally happens all the time; there's _always_ a young heart in its first throes somewhere around the world. But it's like someone flipped a switch, and I went from liking Koushiro-kun as a person to having this enormous crush on him (speaking of, now I know why it's called a 'crush'. It's because it flattens all of your other thoughts to itty bitty pieces, _especially_ the rational ones). Logically, I know these feelings were probably there for a long time, quietly building where I couldn't sense them. Why can't I be like everyone else? Most people see someone, feel a pull, and go from there. For me, it was like using a slow cooker, marinating over time and adding ingredients at intervals. And then eventually, _bam_, the meal was ready, and I was like, "Who even put this in the crock pot?!".

I never used to think that he was cute, or that I wanted to touch him. I used to feel so comfortable around him, but suddenly my heart's doing double time when he's near, and I'm self-conscious, and it's exciting, but it's also terrible, and what if all of this falls apart before I even understand it?

I love being at his apartment so much. His parents are so kind, and sometimes I get to hang out with him alone, and even though I'm nervous, I feel so happy. And sometimes I wonder where we'll go from here. Are we going to end up dating? Where exactly are we? What if he decides that the whole romance thing isn't for him? So far, we've only held hands, and that's pretty rare.

I don't mind. Actually, my brain kind of short-circuits if I try to imagine anything else. But I guess... He's so important to me, and I feel vulnerable in a way I never did before. I'm starting to sense how much it would hurt if he stepped back from where we are now.

How does everyone else do this? You know, like somebody, give up on that, like someone else, on and on. How did I let myself fall into this position where I'm so invested in a sixteen-year-old?

Thank goodness I have the band contest to focus on. I'm a little annoyed at being the liaison between the boys and the fan club, though. They gave me so much crap, you know? At least the girls are nice to me now... I secured enough event tickets for everyone in the club who wanted to attend.

I wonder if any remaining animosity would disappear if I told them that Koushiro-kun is my boyfriend? I'm not sure that he is, though. And anyway, people aren't nearly as open about that kind of thing here are they are in Japan.

I wonder if I could go visit Koushiro-kun tonight? I was there two days ago, though. I shouldn't overstep my bounds. He's probably programming right now...

Yours,

Eimi

**16.03.06**

**Sunday**

**Kido Jyou**

I have to keep reminding myself to take deep breaths. The year is ending, finals are approaching, and there's so much material to cover! I've been meditating like Shuu taught me, but I don't know how much it's helping.

Speaking of, both of my brothers visited for the weekend. I think Mom put them up to it. They talked to me about how my grades are good, and I shouldn't be so stressed out. They took me out with them for a movie and a long dinner. It was nice to catch up with them, but I don't know how to make them understand that I can't ease up now. After all, if Mimi-chan is working so hard, I should, too.

I really admire how much she's improved. She can concentrate for much longer these days, and her mock exam scores and homework grades are going up. And she's been talking to me about a lot of social things lately. In the past, I couldn't get a word in edgewise, but now she's listening, asking questions, trying to understand my perspective.

She asked me to model for Sora-chan's fashion show, and obviously I wanted no part of that. But she said that she chose my outfit design personally and worked with Sora-chan to tailor it more "to my tastes" (whatever she thinks those are, oh boy), and... Well, I don't know. If she can improve so much with her classes, why can't I try something I'm not really inclined towards? I'm going to look ridiculous, of course, but if it's so important to her, then... fine.

And is it my imagination, or is she touching me a lot recently? Stuff like pulling me towards the group by the hand and hugging me before she leaves a tutoring session. I keep telling myself not to read into it, but she doesn't hug Koushiro-kun, and he helps her too. She does hug Eimi-chan and Sora-chan, though...

I should probably stop obsessing and focus on my homework.

**Author's Notes:** Three chapters remain! Thank you for reading :) Feedback is extremely appreciated.

Just as a quick note, I didn't have Jyou call Shuu "Onii-san" because he has two brothers, and I wanted to specify which one he's speaking to. I have no idea how a younger sibling with two same-sex older siblings addresses them. Does anyone know? I'd love to learn.


	27. March 2

**Voices**

March 2: 7th-13th

**March 7, 2016**

**Monday**

**Anami Eimi**

Dear Kitty,

Sweet Aphrodite, my brain is still a pile of useless mush. I don't- where do I even start?

All of my friends studied at Koushiro's place on Sunday. We were there for a long time, split between the kitchen table and the kotatsu. Lately I've been lingering after everyone else leaves, and today I followed Koushiro back into his bedroom after the session. He plopped down on the edge of his bed, which is weird because he usually sits softly and politely.

He leaned forward and started rubbing his temples, so I sat next to him and asked what was wrong. "I'm exhausted," he said. "I've been so busy with our friends lately, and I'm afraid social interactions take a toll on me. I haven't had enough time to recharge alone."

I felt terrible, because I know I've been taking up even more of his time after we study. I told him I would leave so he could rest. But he made that cute puzzled face with the vertical line between his brows and shook his head.

"There's no need," he said. "You're the exception."

I swear I don't know how it happened. One second, I was looking at him and feeling all wibbly inside, like my heart was growing warm and fuzzy. And then, uh... _Well…_

And then I was kissing him.

Well, I don't know! I didn't do it on purpose! It just _happened_! And, and- I didn't, you know, just give him a peck and pull back. It was like one of those movie kisses that always felt so awkward for me to watch, because I was always thinking, "Why would you want to do that? What's the point? Isn't that kind of gross and unhygienic?"

It wasn't gross. Not even a little. I'm so- ugh, my face is so hot- I'm so surprised, because I didn't know, I had no idea I could feel the way I did, both physically and emotionally.

So uh, it turns out that when you... er... Well, when you put your tongue in someone's mouth, you taste them, their breath and their tongue and _their_ mouth. And I mean, I don't know how to describe Koushiro's taste, except that there was a definite tang of oolong tea in there. But mostly it's sort of... A very potent dose of his natural smell (I'm not saying he stinks! We all have a smell!). And I don't know, when that hit my brain, I kind of... Intellectually, I was completely gone. I felt that kiss all over, like a shivering heat singing down my nerves. It was scorching pandemonium, especially because he kissed me back just as hard, and his hands were in my hair, and mine were running along his back, and I could feel him heating up beneath my palms- or was that just my heat?

And then I had to stop kissing him, because suddenly I felt light-headed. Then we sort of... stared at each other, all dumbstruck, I think, and I realized what I had done- what _we_ had done- and then the panic hit. I made a sputtering sound, and I think I was trying to apologize, but I couldn't get the words out, and my face nearly ached from burning. His lips were really pink, and I realized that it was because of all the contact and pressure. And gods, I had mussed his hair up so much, it was almost like bed head, and he looked so, _so_ good.

He seemed a little overwrought himself, which is _really_ weird for him. "I had no idea," he muttered. "I begin to understand why our peers are so interested in..." Then, something shifted back into focus in his eyes. He looked away, but reached for my hand and held it.

"That was very... I don't suppose we could..." His fingers curled, squeezing mine, and I finally understood what he was trying to ask for.

"Y-you don't have to ask," I said. Which sounds braver than it was, because I said it to my lap and half-whispered, but I guess it worked anyway. He cupped my cheek and leaned in, and it was_ so cute_, because it was like he was too shy to look me in the eye, and it made me smile, and I felt a little less panicked.

The second kiss was gentler, and it was just as nice in a different way. We… I guess embraced is the right word? Geez… It felt so intimate and warm, and I don't know if I've ever felt that way before, just totally accepted and wanted and close. And um, when he ended the kiss, he ran his fingertips down my cheek and said my name. _Just_ my name, no honorific, which I have _never_ heard him do for anyone. It felt like my heart jumped straight up my throat and clogged it. Somehow that's freaking me out almost as much as the kisses!

It's like someone flipped a switch, and I finally understand so much now. This is why people are so crazy about romance and relationships and attraction and all of that. I spent sixteen years wondering what arousal even is, Googling "Why aren't I attracted to anyone?" and "How do you get turned on?". _Sixteen years_ without a flicker of romantic interest or desire. And suddenly, suddenly I put my mouth on Koushiro's, and it's like, _Oh. Oh! Yeah, that is pretty great. Sign me the hell up._

In a way, things were easier back then. I'm not saying I could control my feelings, because those just happen, but I could think about how I felt and decide what to do. I was mistress of myself, like Elinor Dashwood. Now I'm pining and careening around like Marianne, can you _imagine_? I don't like it. I don't like how vulnerable I feel, how much my happiness depends on Koushiro continuing to want to kiss my face and call me by just my name.

But at the same time… If I could choose to back away from this, I wouldn't. I've had friends who like me before, but I've never felt so close to anyone. I know this is dangerous territory, because there are plenty of boys who will pretend to like you so they can kiss you and so on, but Koushiro isn't one of them. I'm fairly sure he's like me, and wouldn't even think of kissing someone unless… Well, I guess it's hard for me to say for sure.

Koushiro's mom called us for dinner after that, and then I went back home. I didn't know what to do with myself, so I sat down and wrote this.

It's a good thing I have Sora-chan's fashion show and the next Teenage Wolves concert to think about. Otherwise, I think I'd just be a wreck. I mean, what happens now? Do I get to kiss him again? Are we together now? That's a fair assumption, right? And what if…

You know what? I'd better stop thinking before I get too far ahead of myself here…

Yours,

Eimi

**16/03/08**

**Tuesday**

**Tachikawa Mimi**

Dear Diary,

I talked to Sora-chan last week, and the fashion show is set! The fashion club split into groups of three to create Sora-chan's best designs. Sora-chan has a few already made, so we think we'll have everything put together for a show on the school stage on Thursday!

I'm not doing any sewing, but I'm having so much fun dreaming up makeup and hair for each model to complement their outfit. You'd better believe that I have special plans for Yamato-kun. And I'm going all out on Koushiro-kun's hair and makeup, just to have fun with him, haha! He's gonna be soooo annoyed!

I worked with Sora-chan to tailor Jyou's outfit to his style. Even at home, he dresses sort of business casual. I told Sora-chan we need some kind of blazer, button-down shirt, sweater, and slacks outfit for him. Don't worry, though. I'll make sure he doesn't look stiff or too formal. I think he'll really like what we came up with!

It's a lot of work, but I'm having so much fun with Sora-chan and the fashion club, and I can't wait to see my friends dressed and made up!

Ahhhh, I'm having so much fun teasing Eimi-chan right now! I caught her staring at nothing, all starry-eyed and wistful, and I know a lovestruck girl when I see one! So I cornered her after school in the genkan and told her that we're having a girl meeting after our clubs. She knows me too well by now! She turned pink and tried to get out of it, but no way!

After fashion club, I met up with Sora-chan and Eimi-chan, and we went to my place. Eimi-chan didn't want to say anything, so I remembered Jyou's advice and asked why she's so quiet about stuff. She looked at Sora-chan, like she expected her to answer for her, and I swear, she was about to do it! But I held a hand up, and Sora-chan waited.

Eimi-chan made one of those cute, big-eyed faces and said, "It's just... special. Private."

And I knew it had to be something _really_ juicy, and of course I wanted to know! So I said, "Friends tell each other stuff, Eimi-chan. I want to help you if you're sad and be happy with you if something good happens. We can't support each other if you don't tell us stuff."

She tipped her head (I swear she's so much like a puppy sometimes, I just want to pet her and squish her cheeks) and said, "It's not that I don't... It's just... Of course you're my friends." Then she took a deep breath and turned her eyes anywhere but at us, even though we were all squished on my bed.

She turned bright red and said, "IkissedKoushiro," all in a rush, and it took me a second to understand her. And then I squealed and hugged her because I was so happy, and Sora-chan hid a smile behind her hand, and Eimi-chan tried to hide her face in my shoulder.

And then I was like, "Wait, YOU kissed him? Get it gurrrrrrlllll!" Man, the quiet ones can always surprise you! But I guess I'm not_ too_ surprised. All of my girls are tough!

So anyway, we gossiped for a while, and I tried to be helpful. I told her about some fun places for dates and some of the stuff I learned about dating in the states. I was so happy when Eimi-chan asked me some questions, all unsure and cute, like a little lamb. She's so innocent and new to romance, I'd better keep an eye on her.

Everything is so fun right now, I almost don't mind studying until I pass out at night.

XOXOXO,

Mimi

**16.03.09**

**Wednesday**

**Izumi Koushiro**

I've been staring at this blank page for nearly ten minutes now. I've no idea how to phrase this or organize my thoughts.

Eimi kissed me after a group study session on Monday. At the time, I had no idea why, and it came as an enormous shock. In retrospect, I realize that she was responding to my words. I mentioned being socially exhausted, then added that her presence doesn't strain me. As I spoke, I didn't realize that I was saying anything affectionate, but I suppose it was very much so, despite being a bald statement of fact.

Over the past few weeks, I've been slowly realizing that company and physical interactions can be worth seeking out. I've rarely spared a thought for romantic relationships in the past, save to wonder what certain interactions might feel like, but recently I've been considering experimenting with Eimi.

Hm, I didn't intend for that to sound so clinical. I meant that I'm suddenly thinking about things I haven't before, and my curiosity shifted from mild to acute. But I had no idea how to broach the subject, so I'm fortunate that she took the matter into hand in such a... demonstrative fashion.

There was no way I could have prepared myself for my body's response to that kiss. It seems such a simple thing, but the sensation disrupted my system like a power surge. I imagine my reaction to the stimulus will decrease with repetition, but still, the connection and intimacy involved has its own value.

As always, I lacked the words to explain myself. I wanted to tell her how much I enjoyed kissing her, how much I've come to admire her, and how tender and strange it is to care for her as I do. But listing those points off like an exam answer could hardly convey the emotions behind them.

Instead, I dropped the honorific and asked for another kiss, to communicate that I liked it. It felt simultaneously too rude and too familiar to address her like that, but she smiled so brilliantly in response. Somehow, with just one word, I think I made myself understood.

I can't help but feel optimistic about the future, and grateful that things have somehow developed this way. I've no idea how we wandered to this point, and where we will go from here. I tried looking up advice online, but predictably, it seems there is no universal course to follow. I'd ask my friends, but they don't seem much more experienced than myself, and I'm reluctant to discuss the matter.

I hope Eimi will be patient with me.

**16/03/10**

**Thursday**

**Takenouchi Sora**

What a day! I feel so breathless!

I can't believe it, but Mimi-chan coordinated a fashion show using my designs with her club mates. I'm so touched by how much she believes in me and my designs, and by how much effort she put into it. Everyone has been so busy prepping for the show, but it seemed like they were having fun. And I'm shocked that my friends agreed to model, even Koushiro-kun and Jyou-kun!

I was excused from tennis club today after school to go to the auditorium and help. Mimi-chan worked so hard doing hair and makeup with some of her fashion club friends. I didn't think we'd have an audience, but the whole Teenage Wolves fan club was there, and a lot of students showed up, too! I was so surprised! I wonder who spread the word about the show?

It was so kind of the Teenage Wolves to model for the show when they have their own contest this weekend, but they said it was the least they could do after I made their stage outfits. I wasn't expecting anything in return, but I'm grateful.

I thought the show would be great advertisement for my clothing site, so I asked Taichi's sister and Takeru to record the show for me. Apparently Hikari-chan worked the camera and Takeru is writing an article. I can't wait to see everything on my site, especially since I was too busy helping Mimi-chan and the others prep the models to really watch the show.

I'm worried that I might have tried Yamato's patience... I had him try on the most clothing, so he kept dressing and being styled over and over. I couldn't help it... Somehow so many of my designs skewed towards his style, and of course the audience loved him. Mimi-chan and I kept playing with his hair, and honestly he's pretty particular about how he does it. He definitely slunk off at the end of the show to fix his hair and recharge alone. I'll have to do something nice for him...

Mimi-chan wore a daring dress with a halter top and a short skirt. I swear I designed it longer than it was... I can almost hear her saying, "Shorter, shorter!" to the seamstress. Then she strut down the stage radiating confidence, something I can only admire and try not to envy. She was mesmerizing. I made a form-fitting dress for Eimi-chan to show off her body type. She looked so grown-up, but she was definitely self-conscious! I tried to dress Taichi up just little while keeping his athletic style in mind. He ended up with a polo shirt and cargo pants instead of his usual tee shirts and jerseys. I was so impressed with what Mimi-chan did with Jyou-kun! Somehow, she styled his blazer outfit so that he looked casual, but dressed up. I wonder if it had to do with how she styled his hair and partially untucked his shirt? I'll have to ask her. But poor Koushiro-kun! I think Mimi-chan had a little too much fun with him. She painstakingly styled his hair and put thick-rimmed glasses on him! I designed a tailored hooded sweater for him and khakis with lots of pockets. Mimi-chan must have added the "K" iron-on patch to the shoulder. He seemed irritated, but he mellowed out a little when Eimi-chan said he was handsome and took his picture. She was so googly-eyed around him, it was adorable. I think the glasses were a hit with her; they did suit him.

I wonder if they would accept the clothes as thanks for their modeling? I don't have anything to give the fashion club members who helped, though. They all said it was fun, but I feel indebted to them. Maybe Mimi-chan will have ideas?

Organizing the show was such a rush! I spent the whole time tweaking styling details and coordinating the models on the runway. There was so much activity and energy, and the crowd seemed to enjoy it. I can't wait to see the video!

I want to do something great for Mimi-chan. The show wouldn't have happened if she hadn't thought of it and brought the fashion club and our friends together. I wonder what I can do to repay her? I'm so lucky to be her best friend.

**16/03/11**

**Friday**

**Yagami Taichi**

I invited Momoe-chan to Sora's fashion show. She said I looked great, and she showed me the picture she took of me. She set it to my name, so that it pops up when I call her. I actually haven't called her before... Is that her way of telling me that I should? Hmm.

Man, we have some talented kids at our school. The clothes were really well made, and they put the show together so fast. Mimi-chan was like a hurricane backstage, making everyone up. Haha, I lost my shit when she put makeup on Koushiro! He looked like he was eating a lemon while she did it, but she did a good job. I guess she was trying to press a nerdy girl's buttons with him, and I totally saw Eimi walk into someone else while she was looking at him. For someone who won't talk about her feelings, she sucks at hiding them.

Hikari's movie and pictures look amazing. I thought it was kind of nerdy at first, but I guess film club is working out for her. I'm glad she had fun.

The school year is almost over, but the soccer club is still working hard. I've been talking to Momoe-chan and Koushiro to piece together a strategy with the data for our team's players. She knows a lot about our individual strengths and weaknesses, and it's helping us make plans that suit us as a team.

I also kind of want to know what Koushiro thinks about Momoe. He's not the type to compliment readily, but he seems to like her alright. He's a genius, so he probably has pretty good judgment, right? I trust him, anyway.

That reminds me, Koushiro kept turning me down to meet up after our clubs, and when I asked him why, he said he had study sessions. So I said, "Fine, how about after," and his lips pressed together and got all thin. I knew it was something worth hearing, so I bugged him until he said that he has plans with Eimi then. And he got all red and stiff, and I know what that means.

Damn! Good for him! I was shocked, because it's Koushiro, but also not shocked, because it's Eimi. Still, even though she's been crushing on him for a while, I'm impressed with Koushiro for going for it. Whatever they're doing- I couldn't get much more out of him- I hope it works out for them.

Mimi-chan's been brainstorming ideas for a hanami celebration with me. I wonder where she gets all of this energy? Didn't she plan the fashion show while keeping up with her study group?

Anyway, I can't cook, so I offered to get there early to save the spot and carry stuff. I hope she doesn't turn me into a pack horse… I wonder if I can invite Momoe? Would she want to go?

**16.03.12**

**Saturday**

**Kido Jyou**

The fashion show was mortifying. I just kind of... desperately ignored the crowd and stared offstage as I walked across it. I'm just not meant for this kind of thing.

But... it's not as if anything bad happened, and it was worth it. When Mimi-chan finally stopped fussing over my outfit and my hair, she took a step back and looked me over. Her expression was so focused that I started to sweat. Finally, she grinned and said I looked handsome. Then she kissed my cheek and said, "That's for luck!"

So I guess I can't complain. I don't think anyone's ever called me handsome before. I'm not sure if I agree, but it _is_ a really nice outfit, and that does help. Sora-chan gave all of us our outfits, saying that they were designed for us and made to our measurements anyway, but we insisted on covering the club's fabric costs as a group. But it turns out they raised the money by charging admission to the show! Apparently, the club made a small profit. I didn't expect Mimi-chan to think of something like that, but maybe she's more practical than I thought? Or maybe someone else added that idea? I'm not sure if I should bother asking.

It was a bit trying, but I didn't mind Mimi-chan hovering over me. I like her attention, I guess. But poor Koushiro-kun was so ruffled. I hate to say it, but it was hilarious to watch him back away from Mimi-chan's hands when she worked on him. And was it my imagination, or did she do the most to him? I think she saw her chance to give him a hard time and took it. They have kind of an interesting relationship.

But as I'm sitting here writing about this, the exam clock is ticking. I'm trying not to freak out, but you know how that goes. I have to go study.

**16/03/13**

**Sunday**

**Ishida Yamato**

I'm sitting here staring at the award cheque, and I still can't believe it. The Teenage Wolves won our first contest today.

It wasn't a very big contest, and the reward wasn't anything ridiculous. I shouldn't emphasize it too much. There were only eight bands, all local high school students. But still, we won, and it feels amazing.

Eimi has been promoting our appearance at school, with our fan club, and on our site and social media for a while now, and the turnout was great. It seemed like the whole fan club was there, along with some students from our school and some of our friends. So we had a lot of support, and the noise from the crowd when we went onstage was a nice boost.

We played a three song set, the same one from our first contest. This time, there weren't any problems; we've played them almost every day for months now. We were _on_ up there, and it paid off.

The band returned to the green room after we won, and Sora came in to congratulate us. I still can't believe I did this- normally I wouldn't, but I guess I was worked up. I walked straight to her and hugged her, and I was about to kiss her when I realized that she wasn't the only person coming in. The other bands were in there, but the bigger problem was that the fan club leaders came in after her. They only stayed long enough to congratulate us and take a picture of the band, but I'm sure they put two and two together.

I'm worried about there being some kind of backlash, but so far Sora says there haven't been any issues. Still, that was so thoughtless of me. It's unlike me to slip like that, but... I guess that's just a part of what Sora does to me sometimes. I forget myself every now and then.

Takeru graffitied our website with pictures that Hikari took at the show. He added a comment section to the photo album, and we have some requests for merchandise, stuff like posters, shirts, and post cards. I'm going to ask Eimi to talk to the graphic design club. I wonder if the stuff would actually sell?

The prize money is going towards recording our first CD. Every bit helps, but we need more, and we don't have enough songs yet, anyway.

The band and some of our friends went out to dinner to celebrate. Everyone was wired, so it got a little rowdy, but I guess that's alright every now and then.

Sora's fashion show on Friday was amazing. She's so talented, and the band looked great in their performance gear. Takeru says we're dressed too "edgy," but he was wearing a white bucket hat at the time, so I responded with my finest eye roll. Where does he even store all of those hats?!

Anyway, I'm proud of Sora. When I met her, she had a sketchbook full of designs, but no plans to do anything with them. Now she has an online store that routinely reaches its order limit, she dressed a whole band for our show, and she had a club full of seamstresses working under her to make her designs. I brought up how far she's come, and she said a lot of it is due to Mimi-chan supporting and pushing her. Mimi-chan can be a bit much sometimes, but I'm glad Sora has her.

Sora insists that I keep all of the clothes she made me, but it's four outfits! She says there's no point in giving them back, since they were made for me. I'd better add something to my White Day plans…

But that can wait for now. I'm going to sleep before I pass out at my desk.

**Author's Notes**: Thanks for reading! Two chapters remain. I always appreciate it very much when people leave feedback. What are you hoping to see in the last two chapters? Have a great day!


	28. March 3

**Voices**

March 3: 14th-20th

**16.03.14**

**Monday**

**Kido Jyou**

There's this hollow ringing in my ears, and I think I've been sitting at my desk and staring at my notebook for the last ten minutes. I might need a shock blanket.

It's White Day, and I visited Mimi-chan after our clubs with her gift. I figured since she gave me a cake, I'd give her one. I bought a coconut cake to go with the white theme. When I dropped it off, she grabbed my wrist and said, "I want to go shopping! Will you escort me?"

Monday night seemed like a strange time to shop, but I didn't want her to go alone. I went with her and did all of those things I've heard about: following her through aisles like a duckling, waiting outside of changing rooms, and carrying her bags. I want to ask how she has so much spending money, but I know better. I wonder what her father does for a living? Her mom is a housewife.

On our way home, a little boy fell while he was running past us on the sidewalk. He promptly sat up and started bawling, and no wonder. He had scraped the skin off of his hands and knees. Thankfully, I had my travel first aid kit in my bag, so I apologized to Mimi-chan for the delay and patched him up. She was really good with him, smiling and telling him jokes until he stopped crying. Based on that, I would have guessed that she had a younger sibling, but it's just her natural charm.

The boy had wandered away from his family, but thankfully he knew his mother's mobile number. Mimi-chan and I left her packages with a shop keeper, and I called his mother and carried him to a store a few blocks down.

I figured this wasn't a very good addition to her outing, especially since the kid cried so much. Mimi-chan was very quiet on the walk home. So I tried to apologize and leave quickly after I carried her bags to her room, but she closed her bedroom door when I mentioned leaving.

Then she put her arms around me, stood on her toes, and kissed me.

I can't blame you if you think you're accidentally reading someone else's journal, but that's what happened. She kissed me, and it was just, just shock. Complete system failure. I froze while lightning jumped up and down my nerves.

She giggled and said I was "so cute," which is news to me, since I never defined cute as 'stiff and slack-jawed.' Then she gave me a few more little kisses, smacked my back, and said, "Go home and sit down, Jyou."

I nodded, wide-eyed and dazed, and put my hand on the door knob. But I paused like that, because I just... I guess I needed confirmation. It felt like reality ruptured when she put her mouth on mine, and I had to make sure I hadn't dreamed up everything somehow. So I said, "Mimi-chan... You're sure?"

Her expression shifted from playful to tender, and I was pretty sure I was starting to melt. I've never seen her looking like that before- usually it's cheer, energy, pique, mischief, something vibrant and not serious. This was altogether different, warm and soft and affectionate. I swallowed the wrong way and choked down a cough.

She hugged me and said yes, just yes. My legs went kind of gooey, but she said goodbye, so I knew I had to get out of the apartment somehow.

I don't remember walking home, and I don't remember falling into my desk chair, but here I am. I think my emotions are just starting to catch up with me now. Maybe it's for the best; I can flip out in private.

**March 15, 2016**

**Tuesday**

**Anami Eimi**

Dear Kitty,

I can't seem to focus these days... I keep wondering what's going on between Koushiro and me. It's been so busy with the concert and fashion show and baking that we haven't had a chance to be alone together again. And I realized that Koushiro never mentioned being my boyfriend or dating, and I guess we haven't gone out together, except for that time before Christmas, which wasn't a date.

At first, I figured it was just Koushiro being... well, Koushiro. I don't know what I'm doing either, but he really has no handle on social stuff. But yesterday was White Day, and he didn't mention it at all... I keep telling myself that it's because we mutually exchanged gifts on Valentine's Day, but I keep getting these nagging doubts... What if it means something? I need to work up the nerve to ask, but I'm scared.

Uh... What else? The Teenage Wolves won their first contest. It was really fun, especially since so many kids from our school came out to support us. I'm so proud of how far the boys have come so fast. And now people are asking about TW merchandise! I feel like this is starting to go over my head a little, but it's probably not as big of a deal as it seems. It's easy to get carried away with an audience full of screaming girls egging you on, haha.

Everyone looked so good at Sora-chan's fashion show. I liked Koushiro's outfit the most. He looked so cute in glasses (where did those come from?), and I liked how Mimi-chan did his hair. She gave him eye makeup... He didn't like that at all, but it looked good. I wonder if I looked okay? No one said anything like that... I think Sora-chan might have overestimated me when she was designing my dress. I wish I could be like Mimi-chan and Sora-chan...

The Teenage Wolves, Mimi-chan, and Sora-chan baked today for our White Day party tomorrow. I hope it goes well. I'm glad the girls came to help. Except for Yamato, the boys were... not helpful. Aki got so distracted, he added salt twice to his cookies instead of salt and white sugar, and Hiro scolded him for the next fifteen minutes instead of tossing it and moving on.

Sigh.

Yours,

Eimi

PS: It was Pi Day yesterday! I wanted to celebrate by getting pie with Koushiro, but I was busy with party prep...

**16/03/16**

**Wednesday**

**Ishida Yamato**

The White Day party turned into a huge thing somehow.

We couldn't have it on White Day because of the concert the day before, so we scheduled it for today and prepped on Monday and Tuesday. The other boys were useless in the kitchen, so I enlisted Sora and Mimi-chan to help Eimi and me. We spent hours making cupcakes, brownies, and cookies. It's a good thing we had Mimi-chan. She kept playing music and breaking into singing and dancing contests, which helped when time started to drag. Plus, I got to watch Sora dance and see Mimi pester Eimi about shaking her hips "properly," whatever that means.

The club room was packed the next day. There was barely room to walk, and I had to ask Eimi to work the crowd distributing sweets. We're going to owe her for that; slinking through a crowd is definitely on her 'no thank you' list. We debuted our two newest songs, then hung out with the fan club. It seemed to go over well, although if you ask me, Naoki could have stood to calm down, and Hiro overplayed his hand flirting. But that's just them; we're used to each other by now.

When the girls left, we played one more song for Eimi and Sora. I promised Eimi two songs a year when she agreed to be our manager, so we played her second one for her. We've been practicing it whenever we sent her on an errand (and whenever Mimi kidnapped her), so she didn't know about it. It doesn't have lyrics- she'll write them again- but otherwise it's ready to go. Even though we were really just delivering on our promise, she got all teary eyed (which, of course, meant that Aki teared up, too).

We also offered to start writing rhythm guitar parts for her in future songs, since she's improved under Hiro's guidance, but she turned it down. "We have the wrong audience demographic," she said. I guess it is true that we've somehow become a boy band... She also said that she's busy taking care of administrative stuff for the band, and, well, that's true too.

Afterward, we treated Eimi and Sora to dinner and gave them gourmet chocolates. They seemed happy, although something was a little off with Eimi. I wonder if Koushiro forgot about White Day? Sora didn't mention getting anything from him in return for her gift, either.

When the others left, I told Sora about the couples dancing lessons I signed us up for. I'm not sure what to make of that smile she gave me when she said she couldn't wait to see me dance. I guess I've never done it before, but I can't be that bad, can I?

I hate to admit it, but of course I'm hoping to impress her. I wonder if I know anyone who can teach me something? Dad might actually know a little. You'd be surprised at what he knows.

Hm, I just realized that I had better keep this from Takeru. The last thing I need is him showing up at the lessons to get god knows what out of them...

**16/03/17**

**Thursday**

**Tachikawa Mimi**

Dear Diary,

Oh my goooooood, you won't even _belieeeeeve thiiiiiiis_.

So Jyou came over on White Day to bring me a cake. I don't know, I guess when I saw him, I thought that it would be a pity for him to just leave. Besides, I have a lot of energy from all of the fun things that have been happening, and I couldn't sit still!

So I asked him to go shopping with me, and I was surprised when he said yes, since exams are so close. We went out and had lots of fun! I made him do all kinds of typical date stuff, like looking at my outfits and carrying bags. He was good about it, too! I half expected him to complain, especially since it wasn't even a date. I did see him putting a textbook away when I came out of the changing room, but that's fine. I can compromise, as long as he puts it away when I'm around.

Anyway, a little boy fell over and skinned his hands and knees while we were walking home. Jyou didn't miss a beat; he got on his knees beside the boy and asked if he was okay. He had a first aid kit in his bag, which would be unbelievable for anyone else, but is totally normal for him.

The poor kid was crying- it looked like it hurt! So I tried to talk to him while Jyou took him aside and cleaned his scrapes. He even had different kinds of band-aids for him to chose from! It was so, _so_ sweet to watch.

Eventually, the boy calmed down enough to say that he was lost. I was about to run off and start looking, but Jyou asked if he knew his mom's cell number, and he did! He's so calm and smart about that stuff. Jyou called her and carried the boy back to his mama.

I want to gush about how cute and sweet it was, but you know what? That's just Jyou. He's always like that, always stepping up where other people would walk by. I mean, I can name so many times he went out of his way for other people without even thinking. He ran to find me at the courage contest, even though he didn't want to go inside the factory at night. He supported everyone at the culture fair and teaches first aid demos for his club. And he tutors me, even though he's so focused on his own studies, and he always watches over me and gives me good advice.

What I'm trying to say is that today wasn't the first time I looked at Jyou and thought, _This is what a man should be_. But... I guess it was the first time I realized what that meant to me.

I mean, I thought he looked great at the fashion show, but this was different. My heart skipped a beat when he got on his knees besides that kid and took care of him. I can't stop thinking about it, and about how good he is.

And when he dropped off my shopping bags in my room, I kissed him. I couldn't help it!

He's a terrible kisser, but he'll learn! I'll practice with him as _muuuuch_ as he needs ;) And watching him turn brick red was a nice bonus, hehe! Still, even though I've had much better kisses in a technical way, this one felt a lot more... special. Like I really, really wanted to do it- needed to!- and not just because it would feel nice.

Even though dating kind of burned me in the past, I know I'm safe with Jyou. He cares about me so much, and he's naturally such a nice guy. I'm going to have as much fun as possible with him, and not sweat the details!

But now I feel like I should maybe apologize to Eimi-chan, because after making her talk about Koushiro-kun, I kind of want to keep this to myself for a few days. A special secret... I understand that now. But don't worry, I won't be able to keep it to myself for long, even if I wanted to!

I can't wait until tests are over, and I can go on a date with Jyou and start teaching him a thing or two about kissing ;)

XOXOXO,

Mimi

**16/03/18**

**Friday**

**Takenouchi Sora**

The photos and video from my fashion show are up on my site! Hikari-chan did such a great job, and Takeru's write up is so sweet. Koushiro-kun helped edit and post the video. They're all so capable.

My mom watched the video and complimented me on my designs. But she teased me in that quiet way about "my cute friends" and Yamato's multiple outfits. It's true that everyone looked great in the video, but it's not as if... But there's no use fretting over it. She's just teasing me.

Dad called to congratulate me. He asked me if I would make him a blazer for his lectures, and of course I said yes. I know it's such a little thing, but it makes me feel good to take care of him, and to know that he'll be working in something I made for him. I can't wait until he comes home for spring break, since his lectures are closed then. I'll measure him and make it then.

I made listings for my male designs, and the ordering list is already filled and closed. I was so surprised when I saw that Koushiro-kun and Takeru placed orders! I wonder if Koushiro-kun's order has to do with Eimi-chan's reaction to his outfit from the show... Maybe I should try to tweak the details to her tastes? I think I have a good idea of what she liked about the outfit. She's so... I hate to sound like I'm infantilizing her, but she's just so cute around him, and I can't help watching over them and smiling.

Mimi-chan and I helped the Teenage Wolves prepare for their White Day celebration. It went really well, although it was so crowded! I was worried we had made too many sweets, but they were all eaten!

Their new songs are really good, although I was a little embarrassed by one of them. It was a love song, and... I wonder if Yamato knew he was blushing while he sang? He kept glancing at me and then looking away. I'm not sure if I think it's cute, or if I was embarrassed, too!

And their song for Eimi-chan was so dreamy and mellow. I can tell they were thinking hard about what would suit her when they wrote it. I can't wait to hear her vocals for it. It's so sweet how touched she was over the song, especially when Yamato told me that he promised her two songs per year back in May. I wonder if she forgot, or if she's just grateful by nature? It could go either way with her.

The boys took us to dinner afterward for White Day, and I'm so glad to have these chances to get to know Yamato's friends better. They're an interesting group. Hiro-kun can be arrogant and temperamental, and sometimes Naoki-kun has more energy than he can deal with. Akihiko-kun has a bad habit of drifting off, even when you're talking to him. But they're all good hearted and hard working, and I can tell they all care about each other. I laugh and enjoy myself around them, and I'm so glad Yamato has them. And it was a very classy touch to give us chocolates on top of the dinner! I wonder whose idea that was?

Yamato signed us up for couple's dancing lessons! I can hardly believe it. Somehow, I think he'll either be amazing or terrible at dancing, and I'm not sure which. I don't think I'll mind, regardless. I tried not to notice his little hints, but I know dancing is a physical interaction, and it's often a prelude to... Well, other physical interactions.

I have to keep an eye on this boy...

Speaking of, I noticed that Eimi-chan has been a little distracted lately, and I can't help but wonder if it has to do with Koushiro-kun. I think he forgot about White Day, which I imagine isn't very encouraging to his... girlfriend? Are they dating? Eimi-chan seems confused, herself.

I started Koushiro-kun's order first, since he helped so much with my clothing site. I wonder if I can... gently intervene somehow when I make the clothing delivery. I think I can finish his order tonight.

**16.03.19**

**Saturday**

**Izumi Koushiro**

It would appear I'm already making romantic errors.

Sora-san delivered my clothing order in person after school today. I tried to tell her that there was no need, but she turned the subject and asked what Eimi and I did for White Day.

My stomach lurched. I forgot White Day, which is poor form as a friend, and worse as... Worse for Eimi. I suppose with all of the recent excitement, it slipped my mind.

I apologized to Sora-san, whom I owe a treat. She replied that she's more concerned about Eimi, and I asked Sora-san how I could make amends with her. She suggested that I take Eimi on a date, and she kept repeating that word over and over, slipping it in as much as possible.

"Are you trying to tell me something?" I asked. I suppose I had enough social awareness to find her speech patterns odd, but not enough to understand what she was communicating.

Sora-san smiled and said, "I'm saying you should be upfront with your intentions towards Eimi-chan."

I was still trying to process that when she said goodbye and moved towards the door. But before she left, she grinned and said, "You should wear your fashion show outfit when you take Eimi-chan out. She likes it."

As you can imagine, she left me feeling ruffled and confused.

I'm embarrassed to admit this, but I'm aware that Eimi is fond of that outfit. It's even more unsettling to acknowledge that I enjoyed her interest. That's why I purchased more of Sora-san's clothing. I've never felt attractive or desirable before, but the way she looks at me... How long has she been looking at me like that without my noticing? Is this what Jyou-san kept trying to point out to me?

As strange as it sounds, the evidence speaks for itself: Eimi is attracted to me. She collided with one of Mimi-san's club mates while staring at me, she flushed and asked if she could take my picture, and she said it outright: "You're so handsome."

I'm not. I suppose I'm not actively bad looking, but I'm scrawny and nondescript, save for the red hair. No one's ever- Before this year, I only had friends online, often people much older than me who didn't realize I was so young. We talked about technology, science, and math on forums. I never had much else to offer, and I stuck to the background whenever I could.

And now my club mates are interacting easily with me, I have friends offline, and there's a girl who looks at me with her whole heart in her eyes. I don't know what's happening or how it happened.

But I do know I erred with her, and I need to address that. I was mortified to ask, but I approached Mom for advice. She told me to put on the suit she got me for Christmas, bring Eimi white flowers, and ask her on a date.

That was_ not_ what I wanted to hear. I felt my entire face and neck redden at the thought. But I changed regardless, and Mom smiled and said, "I knew you'd find a use for that suit." Are all mothers omniscient, or is it just mine? Girls are dangerous enough, but women are truly formidable creatures.

I followed her instructions and knocked on the door to Eimi's apartment. Her grandmother answered, and a huge grin broke over her face when she saw me. I'm interpreting this as evidence for my "all women are omniscient" theory.

Thankfully, she let me in without asking questions. I knocked on the door to Eimi's bedroom, and she called, "Come in." I believe my appearance was somewhat of a shock for her; she swiveled her desk chair towards the door, likely expecting her grandmother, and found me, instead. Her eyes widened, and she shifted from a friendly smile to flushing and fidgeting. I felt myself coloring, as well. Not only was I nervous about my task, but she was wearing lounge clothing, tiny shorts and some kind of... cropped shirt beneath a cocoon sweater.

I'm afraid I was extremely stiff, bordering on robotic, and far too polite. I apologized for forgetting White Day and gave her the flowers, and she stood and kissed my cheek. Some of my nerves faded when she accepted the gift and the apology. I suppose I feared that she wouldn't.

She offered to help me make treats for Sora-san and Mimi-san, and I recalled the second half of my instructions. I didn't have much time to plan anything, so I said the first thing that came to mind and asked if she would like to go on a date to the natural history museum tomorrow.

I regretted the words as soon as I spoke them- what kind of suggestion is that, especially for a first date?- but thankfully, somehow, she responded with enthusiasm. She looked so happy... For a moment, I assumed that she must be quite fond of museums.

Then she sat the flowers on her desk and approached me. When we first met, she was taller than me, but I've grown to the point of needing a new uniform, and now I'm slightly taller. She put her arms around me and glanced up into my eyes, and I doubt I could have looked away if I attempted it.

"So tomorrow, um..." Eimi always says "um" or "uh," never "ano" or "eto." I suppose I haven't noticed until recently, not that it- I'm digressing.

Eimi hid her face against my shoulder and said, "Tomorrow, I have a date with my boyfriend?"

I wouldn't be surprised if my body temperature spiked measurably. It's just words, boyfriend and girlfriend, merely labels used for convenience in conversation. I shouldn't concern myself with nomenclature. But the terms are meant to convey information quickly, and that content is the stimulus I'm sensitive to.

But I'm obliged to end there. Taichi-san is calling me, likely to talk about Momoe-san again. I don't know why he's of the opinion that my having a girlfriend makes me some sort of... authority on females. Perhaps he simply likes to talk about her. I'd rather keep such things private, but it seems to be a common compulsion.

**16/03/20**

**Sunday**

**Yagami Taichi**

I took Momoe out to an amusement park for White Day today. I guess that makes it my first date. Sounds a little formal to say it that way.

She was dressed so damned cute, with a newsie cap and little shorts with thigh-high socks. The socks killed me, I don't even know why. And she did her hair differently, I don't know how to describe it, but that's good, right? Making herself up or whatever for our date? I'm glad I wore Sora's clothes, seriously. I would have felt like an idiot if I was next to her in a tee shirt or something, and I don't even think about that stuff.

It turns out that Momoe really likes roller coasters. Oh, and she can put away food like no one's business! Where does she put it?! She ate my last doughnut when I wasn't looking. And uh, somehow this is kind of embarrassing, but she whooped my ass at the game booths. Not that I'm salty or anything. She won me a prize at the ring toss game. I was going to give it to Hikari, since I don't need a stuffed toy, but Sora said my ass will be grass if Momoe ever comes to my place and finds out that I gave someone else that plushie.

Anyway, we did all of the stereotypical date stuff, and I guess it kind of sounds like it would be boring or too common or whatever, but... I had a great time. I held her hand, and she wasn't nervous or awkward about it. She looked so happy, and she was so damned cute and so easy to talk to. I'm a little worried that she, uh, might be out of my league. She's smart as hell, always ready with a grin and a comeback. I dunno, she just strikes me as one of those girls who will grow into a woman that gets shit done and kicks drinks back after hours, then does it again like it's nothing the next day.

And when I walked her back home, she grabbed my collar, got on her tip toes, and kissed me. _Damn!_

Goddammit, I'm not going to be able to stop grinning, and one of my teammates saw us at the theme park. He's going to give me so much shit. But what can you do? I'll just smirk and let them think what they will.

It turns out this girl/dating stuff isn't as hard as I thought it was! I wonder what we should do next, after our exams? Momoe said she'd come to the hanami party, so I guess it's that. She's in a different class, so she doesn't know my friends that well outside of our club. They'll all like her, but uh... I think I had better make sure she doesn't sit next to Mimi. That seems... dangerous. Momoe's too competitive, I feel like something might start between them before I can stop it. All this time I thought Momoe was so chill outside of soccer stuff, but it's pretty easy to rile her up.

Haha, I can see us causing lots of trouble together. That's what makes it fun.

**Author's note:** One chapter remains! Since the kids are taking exams, it will be a bit short and reflective. I'll try to post it within a week. Thanks for reading, and please remember to share your thoughts with me :D


	29. March 4

**Voices**

March 4: 21st-27th

**16/03/21**

**Monday**

**Takenouchi Sora**

We're taking finals, so I don't have too much time to write. But I wanted to write one last entry, just for the sake of completion and reflection.

But first, let me say that our first dance lesson was so fun! At first, Yamato was stiff and uncomfortable. But eventually, his focus shifted from being self-conscious to dancing, and that's when everything clicked. I've mentioned this before, but he's very... gentlemanly. He focuses on making sure I'm happy, and on presenting his best self. That makes him a great dancing partner in itself. I'm not much of a judge, but once he got into that head space, I think he was great. I can't wait to learn all kinds of dances with him. I hope I'm doing alright! Yamato said I did well, but you know how that is.

It's mind-blowing to compare myself in April 2015 to myself now. I only knew a few people in my class, there was so much friction at home with Mom, and I had never shown anyone my design sketches or mentioned making clothing. Now, my Mom and I are on friendly terms, and although I'm still struggling to understand her, it's a huge improvement. I have lots of friends in my class, in tennis club, and in the fashion club, too. And I've never had a closer friend than Mimi-chan.

My clothing line is doing really well, and I've saved up a lot of money already. I'm even investing with Mom's guidance! I'm hoping to save it for college, although I won't lie- I've bought a lot of sewing materials and fashion books. I never used to have any confidence that I could make my dream of designing clothing come true, but now... Well, it may be small scale, but I'm already making my own lines! And I held my own fashion show, too, with lots of help from my friends. I really believe I can do this now, which is such a wonderful feeling.

I want to make some new designs over break, plus the blazer for Dad. I'm really looking forward to introducing him to Yamato... Which is another new aspect to my life this year.

I'm not sure what to say about that. I never thought about having a boyfriend before, and suddenly I have one. Because of how young we are, we can't spend that much time alone together, and we're at the age where figuring ourselves out is the priority. But still, he's so important to me, and his support and love mean so much. It's more than just having fun together. I'm always looking forward to what comes next with him.

There are four classes per grade level, so the odds of all of us being in the same class next year are low. I really hope I can be with Yamato and Mimi-chan. Whichever class has her in it is sure to be the most fun! And I prayed for her exam success over the weekend, since so much is riding on her scores. Please let Mimi-chan pass! She's worked so hard, and she's done so much for me, I want to see her be happy.

If I can be even half as blessed next year as I was this year, I'll be set for happiness. I'm going to keep enjoying my present with an eye towards my future. When we finish our exams, I have to be sure to thank my friends, my family, and my club mates for a wonderful year.

**16.03.22**

**Tuesday**

**Kido Jyou**

Mimi-chan and I studied all weekend for our finals, and we prayed at a shrine for exam success, too. I really hope she does well. She's worked so hard and learned so much about studying and note-taking and concentration. It would be such a blow for her if she's not rewarded for all of that work. And obviously I want to be in the same year as her.

Even though we're together now, we've been too focused on exam prep these last few days to think about it. That's fine; frankly, I still don't believe it myself. Still, I was annoyed when my family and friends didn't believe that we're together. Sora-chan and Eimi-chan were the only ones to calmly accept it without questions or teasing. At least _they_ congratulated us... Koushiro-kun had the nerve to ask me if I wasn't sure that I was mistaken somehow, and don't get me started on Taichi-kun. And my brothers! Hmph.

Anyway... I guess we're all splitting up next year. I hope Mimi-chan, Eimi-chan, and Koushiro-kun can be in my class, at least, but there's no telling how we'll be distributed. What's most important is that Mimi-chan should be with Sora-chan. She cares about her so much, I know she'd miss her.

I made a lot more friends than I've had in the past this year, and we did a lot of fun things. I found that I enjoy group study, as well. It's a great way to learn while avoiding being a complete hermit. And then there's Mimi-chan... I still don't know how this happened, and what will happen next, but I'm so happy about it that sometimes it's like I can't believe it myself, either. I told Mimi-chan that when she asked me why I was suddenly turning red and having trouble talking to her. The next day, she brought me a framed picture of her. She wrote, "I love you, Jyou" on it with a pink marker. She's... she's so frank. How does she just say things like that?

I keep it on my desk. It helps, but I'm still wrapping my head around things.

Next year, I want to maintain my friendships and relax a little more. But not too much! College entrance exams are a year closer. Anyway, I think I'll be forced to take it a little easier, regardless. Mimi-chan will want to go on dates. That's fine, as long as some of them are study dates. I wonder how I can negotiate that...

I'm starting to realize that I'm in over my head with Mimi-chan. Oh, boy...

Well, my immediate concern is to survive my lab practical with Taichi-kun, and to see Mimi-chan pass. I need to go so I can study, get to bed, and stop by a shrine early in the morning to get one last prayer in for her.

**March 23, 2016**

**Wednesday**

**Anami Eimi**

Dear Kitty,

I can't believe it's been a whole school year already. Last April, I could barely read kanji, and I was a stranger in Japan. I remember having days when I fell into bed after my club meetings and cried, because I felt so alone and lost.

Now, I've never felt more happy and at home. So much has happened and changed, and... I made so many incredible friends, and I have a great relationship with my Grandma. I've never felt so peaceful and at ease in my living space before, and it's all thanks to her. I learned so much about music and playing guitar, and I navigated the emotions and whims of four teenage boys and watched them become a contest-winning band. Oh, and I dealt with the Yamato fan girls with Taichi at my back, and then I made peace with them, which was such a relief. I went on summer group activities, got my first job, and learned so much about Japan.

And then there's Koushiro... We should have studied on Sunday, but we went on a date- a real date this time!- and then studied together in the late afternoon and evening. And Zeus above, I know this sounds like I'm making it up, but he brought me flowers and asked me to go out with him- he wore a suit and everything! I swear! It was so awkward and so perfect, and those were my first flowers ever, and Sora-chan pressed one for me so I can frame it and keep it, and I'm deliriously happy, and I spent hours pointing out what skeletal structures and teeth shapes imply for the behaviors of extinct animals at the natural history museum to Koushiro on Sunday, and he was interested, can you even believe it? I mean, yes, I guess you can, but... He wore his fashion show outfit, even the glasses with the blank lenses, he was _so _cute and I held his arm and he got me lunch and a pretty amethyst chunk at the museum and I don't even know what's happening, but I'm his girlfriend, and a girlfriend gets to kiss her boyfriend's cute nerdy face, and good lord is there no end to this sentence.

Okay. Okay, I'm good. Look, obviously I'm freaking out, but I'm trying to remember that we're just kids, and we're years away from knowing where we'll end up. But I can't... I love him more than I should. I keep telling myself to be careful and wise, but I know I already handed my heart over to him. Maybe I should talk to Sora-chan about this... I feel like she'll know what I mean, somehow.

I'm so sad that our group will be split up soon. I know we can all hang out and study together, but it won't be quite the same. I really hope I can be with Koushiro and Jyou-kun, but... Geez, I can't imagine being without any of them. At least I know I'll keep seeing the Teenage Wolves every day.

Jyou-kun and Mimi-chan mentioned going to a shrine to pray for exam success. Since Koushiro and I missed some studying for our date, we studied instead. But before school on Monday, I went to a shrine and prayed for Mimi-chan's success. But... Well, I was greedy and asked to continue to grow, to spend time with my friends and Koushiro, to be good to Grandma, to learn new recipes with Izumi-san... I asked for so much. But that's because there's so much to look forward to!

I want to thank everyone I met here from the bottom of my heart. I wish I knew how! Maybe if I make something really good for the hanami party? How about a strawberry shortcake?

Yours,

Eimi

**16/03/24**

**Thursday**

**Ishida Yamato**

Finals ended today, so I guess that's it, really. Just a day and a half of ceremonies for the graduating class and hanging out for everyone else. I can't believe the year is over.

It's surreal to think that, when I started this school year, I hardly knew anyone, and I was struggling to form a band. People were showing up with violins, and I needed a fifth member to qualify as a club. Man, now we have a fan club, some merchandise, a contest win, and we're saving and working towards recording a studio-quality CD. That's crazy- I can't believe we did so much.

I'm not sure if I've ever had this many close friends, either. It's trying sometimes, especially when you're dealing with over-sized personalities like Hiro, Mimi-chan, and Taichi, but it's been fun. I saw Takeru a lot this year, which is great, but also a little alarming. Did I mention that he brought about six female friends to our last show? Sometimes I feel like I can't get my bearings with him. What happened to that kid who used to build intricate block fortresses with me?

Anyway, things are going much better with Mom, too. She wasn't really in my life at all last April, but now I see her once a month, and I'm almost able to talk comfortably with her. It's a process, I guess. Sometimes I wonder if it would have been easier to continue as we were, but... When I see Sora growing closer to her Mom and being so happy about it, I know I'm doing the right thing, too.

Speaking of Sora... I never could have anticipated what was coming with her. If someone told me that I would meet someone else I cared for like Takeru and Dad, I would have shook my head and ignored them. Making friends like the Teenage Wolves and the others was a slight stretch already, but Sora? Every time I'm alone with her, I end up letting her in more and more, telling her things I've never told anyone, trusting her to help bridge the gap between myself and my mother, and asking for her advice with Takeru. Even letting her dress the band up for the concert is something I never would have allowed in the past. I mean, where is this going to go? I know we're only high schoolers, but I just... I can't imagine stepping back from her.

Dancing with her was amazing, and we hardly know what we're doing. At first I felt a little awkward, since there were other couples and I didn't know the steps, like I did with the folk dance on Sports Day. But seeing her smiling in my arms like that was... I'd say that I'm worried about how bad I have it for her, but I'm not. I trust her, end of story.

So next year, I want to spend a lot of time with Sora, stay close to my family, and feel completely comfortable with Mom, even if that takes all year. I want to hang out with Takeru and make sure no more neon purple hats end up on his head. And we're hoping to record our first CD somewhere around autumn. Maybe we can have some kind of band retreat over summer break? I want to keep moving forward as a band; we can't get complacent because we accomplished a lot this year.

But first, I have Mimi-chan's hanami party to think of. Maybe I could convince Sora to help me cook something for it...

**16.03.25**

**Friday**

**Izumi Koushiro**

Finals have ended, and the student body is breathing a collective sigh of relief. I believe I did well, and a break from studying is welcome. I was able to program at home directly after my club meeting today.

My date with Eimi went well. We were at the museum for hours, teaching one another whatever we knew about the exhibits. I was impressed by Eimi's knowledge and enthusiasm for animals and evolutionary history. She seemed to enjoy it so much that I suggested visiting an airspace or technology museum next, which she readily agreed to.

Taichi-san suggested that she might prefer something more stimulating. I assumed he meant 'anything but more museums,' but he specified a theme park. That sounds enjoyable, too. I told him that I'm in no rush; Eimi and I will get to everything in time.

Now that my parents know we're together, they're offering advice. Mom promised to remind me of important dates in the future, and Dad's been telling me things like, "Make sure you tell her she looks nice if you have that thought." I'm trying to remember everything they tell me, but it's overwhelming. Fortunately, Eimi is patient with me.

The rising computer club president spoke to me today about planning presentations, discussions, and an outing for next year. I don't want to become fully responsible for those matters, as I value time with my personal projects, my parents, and Eimi, but I do want to help.

I'm looking forward to having time alone over break, but Mimi-san's hanami party will be enjoyable, I'm sure. Eimi asked me if we could prepare something for it with Mom. I'm sure Eimi will appear at my apartment over spring break regardless, but I'll be sure to ask her out, as well.

I believe I mentioned this previously, so I won't expound here, but... I hope I can continue to improve my relationships with my family and friends. I've come a long way recently, but there's still plenty of room to grow. This year, I hope to approach it more willingly, to offer my time without resentment, but to also value my needs and health. Balance is key, it would seem.

I suspect my parents, Eimi, and Jyou-san won't allow me to neglect my health, regardless. Strange how easy it is to forget that they're here for me, along with the others. Despite everything, I've found myself surrounded and supported by friends and family.

I'll endeavor to be more cognizant of that.

**16/03/26**

**Saturday**

**Tachikawa Mimi**

Dear Diary,

I did it! I passed! I'm going to move on to year two with my friends! I'm so happy!

I studied _so_ much for _so_ long, it was awful! All of those pretty, perfect Sundays when I had to sit at a desk and study, ugh. But Jyou and my friends made it tolerable, and I learned stuff from them that will keep me out of this situation in the future, I hope.

My parents have met Jyou, but I introduced him to them as my boyfriend today, and I told them about everything he's done to help me pass. They were so grateful to him and supportive of us. Haha, I can see where they would like him more than any other boy I've shown them. Poor Jyou didn't know how to act, especially when my parents invited him out to a fancy dinner! I have the best parents ever.

Today was our last day of school as first years. I cried! I mean, my friends are going to be split up in different classes, and the third years left my club, and ahhhh, it's so sad. I want to play with everyone every day!

But I'll make sure we have lots of fun together, no matter what! That's what you do for friends like these. We really came together this year, you know? I made friends with Sora-chan, and she's been my best friend ever, so sweet and amazing and perfect and cute. I drew Eimi-chan out of her shell, patched things up with Koushiro-kun to the point where he sat still while I did his makeup (hehe!), scoped out Yamato-kun and decided he might just _almost_ deserve Sora-chan, and planned events and schemes with Taichi-kun. And that doesn't even touch on my fashion club friends and everyone I knew before I left Japan! It's been a fun time, except for all of the studying.

I feel pumped just thinking of things like our beach trip, cheer leading with Eimi-chan, running the class bazaar for the culture festival, my New Year's party, and putting together Sora-chan's fashion show. We're gonna go even bigger next year! Watch out!

I wish I could be with all of my friends next year, but at least give me Sora-chan and Jyou! Either way, I'll make lots of friends and keep playing with the old ones.

I gotta call the others about the hanami party! Don't worry! This assignment might be over, but I'll keep writing in you, diary. How else will I remember all of the fun stuff I do with my friends and Jyou?

XOXOXO,

Mimi

**16/03/27**

**Sunday**

**Yagami Taichi**

Yes, spring break! The weather's fine, we're free, and it's time to play soccer and hang out!

I've been talking a lot with the captain about becoming the new captain next year. I'm a little nervous, but mostly pumped. I want to help the team work to our strengths and be at our best, and thankfully I have Koushiro, Momoe, and the team to help me. As long as I keep everyone in the loop, it will work out, right? I'm trying not to sweat it.

I'm bummed about our class splitting up. We got along really well, and our group stuff was successful. But we can always hang out- actually, I think Mimi-chan will force us, regardless.

Speaking of, I want to organize a soccer game with my friends and some teammates over the break. And I should talk to our nerd herd. If Koushiro and the others help me out, I might actually complete my homework assignments. Or, you know. Maybe not.

My friends did so many awesome things this year... Fashion shows, band contests, software development, first aid demonstrations... I hate to go there, but maybe I should think about what I want to do in the future. I have no clue, man. Pro athlete? Am I good enough? I bet my friends have more certain answers. Maybe I should talk to them. Haha, what does Koushiro want to do? Take over the world? (I'm not entirely joking. Kid's one step away from mad scientist territory. I'd better stay on his good side, haha).

As I thought, Mimi-chan is completely loading me up on things to carry to the hanami party. Yamato's helping me haul it all, and I'm enlisting Jyou, too. I asked Momoe to bring some drinks, and I'm sending Takeru and Hikari to help her carry them. The more the merrier, yeah? Plus, Hikari wants to meet Momoe. I wonder if she's protective of me, too? It feels kind of weird to write that.

This year was hard in some spots, but a lot of good stuff happened, too. I'm looking forward to having a great time as a second year student.

And hey, I'm sure our group can keep things interesting.

**Author's notes:** And there you have it! Thanks for reading, and an enormous thank you to everyone who sent me reviews! I appreciate them so much. Somehow, this story grew to be over 100,000 words long! If you enjoyed the story, please leave me feedback. I put a lot of work into this one, week in and week out for a year.

It was really weird how this story didn't have, you know… A clean conclusion or closing arc. It just hit the time of the year when the journal assignment ended. I tried to give it a sense of closure, but it's just the nature of the story I set up, I guess.

If you're wondering what to read next, check out my other Digimon stories! They all feature the Adventure 01 and 02 cast, and Eimi is around in most of them, too. I have a story set in an American college, a story that is not an AU (gasp), a story featuring the Chosen as adults, and some Daiken stuff. Something for everyone!

Thanks again for reading, and have an awesome day!


End file.
